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Past Shadows; [P] Seia Doon D'Aiel
Topic Started: Oct 4 2009, 09:30 PM (414 Views)
E'doa A'nii
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[ *  *  *  *  * ]
"I am Seia Doon D'Aiel" She responded. Her large endless black eyes seemed to absorb his person. The priest found that he had to look away ocassionally to reassure himself that he really wasn't falling into an endless pit of darkness. The girl--she couldn't have been older then 18-- was in pretty poor condition. Her clothes were dirty and tattered about the edges. Physically though, she looked like she hadn't eaten in weeks. Gaunt, hollow; sunken eyed. She almost looked like a monser who crawled out of the woods. She practically had crawled out of the woods.

The girl was too weak to walk for long.

"How did you come to be here?" He asked, handing her a bowl of soup and a piece of bread. Being a priest, he often kept food around for just such occasions as this. The girl took the food reluctantly, but with much gratitude and proceeded to devour it all at once. It was good to see that her thiness was not from a lack of desire to eat.

When she had gotton some of the food inside of her, she responded: "I ran away". Which was all she had time to say before the next spoonful of soup entered her mouth. "Ran away from where?"

"My village." She gulped down a large bite of bread.

"Why?" That question bore as much concern and genuine interest as it did plain curiosity. The aged priest settled himself down in his chair; crossed his knobby ankles and folded his arms. His air was of one who was prepared to listen as long as necessary. Indeed he was. His wise blue eyes watched her in much the same way a mother watches a sick or injured child.

His patient set the bowl down. Obviously considering asking for seconds. She certainly needed seconds. The priest got up to get her more, but she stopped him.

"Thank you, father. I'll be fine.--I ran away because I wasn't wanted."

He'd heard that before. It was an effort not to say what he always said and wait for her to finish her story. But he asked anyway: "What makes you say that?"

"My village hates me. The one woman I trusted has been using me my whole life." Seia shrugged. A display of not caring which totally belied her actions.

"Why don't you tell me your story?"

"It would be poor repayment for your kindness."

"Nonesense. It would be the greatest favor you could do me. I enjoy listening about other people, no matter how depressing their stories."

Seia wasn't sure if he was just saying that, or if he really meant it. But if he insisted, well, she owed him that much. "It's a long story, father." She warned him.

He chuckled, "I am prepared."
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"It all started when I was six years old... "

It had been an unusually bad day. Mother was cross, because Seia had let the chickens out of the coop, and daddy had beat her. Daddy was drunk again... He was always drunk monday morning. Seia had managed to stay out of daddy's way, but now she was bored. The big boys were playing, and she decided that she would hang out with them. It was better than doing chores. Maybe she would learn something new?

She sat on the green while they played soccer, and watched them while they played at marbles. (They wouldn't let her play 'cause she was a girl.) And generally followed them about town. Right about noon she followed them into the bar. She had no idea it was a bar, muchless that they served beer there. She was too young to know what 'drunk' was, except that that's what mommy called daddy when he came home acting mean, and talking funny. So it was that after the boys had had a few pints, they got an idea: Seia was small. She obviously wanted to be part of their games, well, they would start up a game of midget tossing with some more of the boys. Seia would be the midget. That was something she could play; and it did not matter if she was a girl or not.

So one of them scooped her up and tossed as high as he could. Seia was terrified by this game. It reminded her too much of the time daddy had actually caught her, picked her up and tossed her at mommy. (Who could not catch her, because Seia was too heavy). She had hit the ground pretty hard and was very sore for quite some time. She immediately began crying and flailing, which only amused the boys more. At length they stopped catching Seia by her waist and went for the more easy to grab appendages. She began trying to pummel and kick them. She was too small to do any damage. They simply chuckled, returned a friendly cuff (probably a little harder then they intended) and tossed her again. Finally terror, pain and the general abuse of the game got to her and she passed out.

When she awoke they were all dead; slaughtered. The townsfolk who had not been playing were all gathered about her staring and pointing and whispering in frightened tones. Seia herself was was stained with blood, and quite sore. She was covered in bruises, her left shoulder had been dislocated and her ankle was sprained. Weak, but otherwise alright, she struggled to get up. The bodies of the dead men frightened her as much as her prior experience and she began to cry again.

For a moment she simply stared at the corpses, blubbering and sucking on one finger; and then she turned and ran. She bumped into someone who scooped her up. Long spidery fingers tickled her under chin.

Mother was saying something. Seia had buried her face into the shoulder of whoever it was that had picked her up; so she could not hear.

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"I awoke to find myself in a dark little cottage. I did not recognize my surroundings..."

Little cobwebs hung in the corner, puddle drips stained the floor. A gaunt hungry looking dog lay down by the door and stared at her in an unfriendly manner. When Sia moved to sit up and look about the dog began to growl. An old woman came in. She struck terror into Seia instantly. The hag was bent over double, for her backbone had cemented that way. Her wrinkled baggy skin clung tightly to her bones; so much so that she seemed incredibly thin and undernourished. She walked on a wooden cane. Her bony knuckles grasped the wooden skull carved on top and brandished the cane at the dog.

"Shut up you old beast." The dog lay back down and eyed Seia in a friendlier manner.

Seia began to cry as the old hag approached. The little girl was picke dup and carried kicking and screaming to the breakfast table, where she was given a bowl of porridge and commanded to eat it. She did exactly as she was told, because she was scared. The oatmeal was sticky and tasteless.

During breakfast the old woman said themost horrible things, about how Seia was going to stay with her; and how she would never get to see her mother again. Seia cried all through breakfast. After breakfast, the old hag brought out a jar of paint and a paintbrush. She proceeded to paint a rune on Seia's shoulder. A process which fascinated the girl enough to quiet her down some.

Seia was not allowed to use paint. It surprised her that the old woman would go far as to paint on her. But the surprise quickly gave way to pain. The paint hurt. Searing hot pain shot like knives through Seia's tiny body, causing her to writhe in pain for what seemed an agonizingly long time.

After a minute the pain passed. Seia was frightened but alright. She never got to see her parents; and after about a year, hope began to fade, and affection for, Vanessa, the old woman grew. Vanessa was not unkind, and it was not hard for one so young, and so unattached to tranferr her feelings to another.
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"The woman who took me in was a witch. And she ruled the village with a vengeance. People didn't disagree when she said 'boo'; but they hated her guts. They couldn't fight her, so they fought me instead. Now, I know why. But then, it puzzled me and frustrated me." Seia adjusted herself on her seat; her thin frame curled up in the large chair. The priest had handed her a shawl, which she now wore to keep out the evening cold. She hoped he would not ask her to stay. It would be a risk for him.

More of a risk than he knew.

Her voice was very steady as she talked on. She was used to it. It did not matter anymore. "But more then that, they hated me too; I carry two burdens. The first is a great beast which perpetually hunts me. It is attracted by my power, for my powers anger it. I cannot kill it. It will not kill me, thanks to Vanessa, but it does not make my life any easier. Instead, because it cannot get at me, it attacks and kills others.

The second is that anyone who befriends me must die. That is the curse of the beast. I would not have run away; the unkindness of the village I could bear. At least it kept them from dying too. Well, some of them. Those who tried to kill me..." Here her voice quivered and Seia looked a little sick.

"...they died. The beast--it comes. It will not let anyone hurt me except itself." Her facial expression changed from a sick look to one of terror and disgust. Those abysmal black eyes got darker. If that was possible. Her mouth hung open and her voice came out a little breathily, as her fingers clutched the edge of the chair so hard that her knuckles turned white. Infact the effort to acknowledge this fact was so great that Seia swayed in her chair a bit.

The good father became concerned and moved to steady her. He was about to say someting about continuing the story when she was well, but she shook her head and smiled tiredly. "I'm fine, father. Thank you."

She shook her head to clear it. He didn't really want to hear about all the horrible ways the people had died; or how she had found some of her best friends... Seia shuddered again and suppressed that thought. "To make a long story short...I discovered that Vanessa was using me to manipulate the village. She delighted in their destruction and the pain they brought me. More importantly, she liked that they drove me back to her. I would do whatever she asked me to; because she was the only one who was kind to me. And then...one day...I found out that she was killing my friends too."



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That last little part was uttered very softly; a tone that carried a world of pain and a hint of a great anger that had only barely been discovered.

"I am going to get you away from here."

Seia looked into his brown eyes and saw that he meant it.

"Why?" She asked him.

"She's not good for you, Se-Se. She teaches you bad things, like how to hurt people;keeps you locked up in that house when you're not running errands.

He was genuinely concerned. Seia didn't understand why. Hurting people was only fair. Vanessa said so. They hurt her didn't they? Didn't they deserve some of it? Ok... so maybe she had gone to far with Clayton. She hadn't needed to shame him like that. His pride was a weakness though. Clayton had killed himself accidentally in an effort to prove himself after Seia had pretty much emasculated him. She had chuckled at that once. What a fool. Now, she fingered Qiedra's hilt uncomfortably and looked at the ground. With her other hand she rubbed her shoulder absently. Yeah... Clayton. And he was one of the nicer ones...

Jordan was getting to her. Usually she wouldn't have cared. But Jordan was so... nice. He wasn't like Vanessa. Vanessa gave her food and clothes and kept the beast away. She fed Seia's bitterness and pointed wrongs done. Vanessa was forever reminding Seia of how much she owed her, and always explaining why huting others was for her own good. Vanessa called that it love. Jordan hugged her and held her and kept lonliness away. He thought Seia was special. He taught her how to defend herself, and stood up to the village for her. He was teaching her how to read and write, and the difference between good and evil. He was teaching her forgiveness and the meaning of sacrifice. He called that love.

Somehow Jordan was winning over Vanessa. Seia didn't understand it. The feeling of really belonging frightened and delighted her all at once. Jordan's concepts didn't always makes sense, but they worked. She was starting to see some changes in the villagers. Reading was hard, and writing was worse; but she did them for Jordan because they pleased him. The same reason she had destroyed Clayton; it pleased Vanessa.

But the difference in worldviews was confusing; and Seia often lost patience with Jordan. She was meaner to him then he deserved; what was worse was that sometimes she wanted to be mean to him. Just to see if he would give up on his worldview and throw her out like the others. But Jordan was faithful and very forgiving. He always managed to show Seia why she was wrong without making her feel like a total idiot; yet he always made her feel ashamed anyway. He said she should feel ashamed when she was wrong. It was one of the ways you knew you were wrong.

Jordan knew how she felt; and understood her confusion. Right now he--much to Seia's relief-- did not make any comment about Clayton. Instead he simply put a hand under her chin and gently raised her eyes to his. "We can go tonight if you like. You can stay with me."

Part of her wanted this moment to last forever. Clayton had such pretty brown eyes. Eyes that never accused; never belittled; never condescended. Eyes that always cared; always thought. He could always see the bright side.

Part of her wanted to say yes. She could stay the night there. No one would pick on her while Jordan was around. He wouldn't let them. She wouldn't have to go back home to the dingy cottage and nagging Vanessa. Odd that. Home always seemed so ...burdensome when she was with Jordan.

Part of her wanted to say no. Vanessa would be furious. She was possesive at best; down right jealous at worst. Especially of Jordan. Most of the villagers, Vanessa talked of with contempt. If they were kind to Seia, they wanted something. They would dump her when they got it. For the most part that was true; but Seia had found people who weren't like that. Strangely enough, they always died. So it had been that Seia had been reluctant in making friends with Jordan. The witch had done her part to help that reluctance; pointing out everylittle thing and shadowing it in suspicion of Jordan's ulterior motives.

But Jordan had weedled his way into Seia's lonely, broken heart, taken root and refused to budge. Vanessa had since showered him in contempt and ensured that his life was pretty miserable. Seia had refused to see it at first, and Jordan did not press the matter. But as time went on Seia became suspicious of Vanessa's influence. Now she was worried for Jordan. He might die like the others, and this time it wouldn't be the beast. Vanessa was quite good at pinpointing when and how the beast had killed the others.

But Seia wasn't sure the witch would wait for the beast. Jordan had already assured Seia that the beast would not hurt him. Seia doubted it; everything else Jordan had said had been true. She hoped he was right on that one. Whatever the case, Jordan had irked Vanessa's wrath, and the witch was no longer hiding her outright displeasure with Seia's association. Seia had been horribly abused simply for seeing Jordan, and the witch had explained that if she did not see sense soon more drastic measures would be taken.

If she stayed the night with Jordan, they both might get it. She was going to have a hard enough time explaining herself as it was. And it wasn't certain that if she went home Jordan would be spared. Her friend was aware of her vacillation and worry. He simply shrugged.

"You don't have to make up your mind all at once now. I can always take you away another day."

Good old Jordan. She almost said yes right there. Instead, she simply nodded and smiled gratefully and turned to walk away.
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Seia lay as gingerly on her cot as was humanly possible without levitation of some kind. Vanessa had whipped her from head to toe, till she could no longer support herself. Then she had set about using her powers so that everytime Seia so much as contemplated the name 'Jordan' she would recieve pain. So it was that Seia had a throbbing headache as she decided whether she should go outside and see Jordan, and make sure he was ok.

Carefully, she walked outside. The shadows seemed to draw around her as she went, blending her person neatly into the darkness. Seia hated darkness. She feared it more than heights. Darkness was where the beast hid; when it most often attacked her. Darkness was where she was kept when she was unusally bad. Locked in the dark with strange frightening creatures that made terrible noises and often tried -fortunately, without success- to do her harm. It was in darkness that Seia was subjected to living out her most horrible nightmares and experiencing ones she had not yet imagined.

It took her hours to get to sleep at night; the slightest sound woke her. But she was going to be brave tonight and try and visit Jordan. She hardly dared to breathe as she stepped outside.The stars which most considered so bright, were not nearly enough illumination to calm Seia's fears; even coupled with the moon. It was so terribly quiet. Others might have found it peaceful, with the rustling of the leaves and the owl calls. But not Seia. Every little noise made her jump and moan as she made her way through the village.

Fear and pain do not mix well, and Seia arrived at Jordan's house sweating profusely, trembling violently and panting hard. A little shadow hugging the wall. Seia stepped inside gritting her teeth against the pain inflicted by the witch's spell. She hurt from head to toe now; like the skin was being flayed off her bones. Tears of pain streamed from her eyes. Her breath came in ragged gasps.

The village girl was just in time to see Vanessa hovering like the Grim Reaper over Jordan's still frame.

"Y-you...didn't!" She murmered. It was hard to be forceful when you could barely breath, and were trying to keep from screaming/crying and thrashing about on the floor. The sound was enough. The witch turned about quite suddenly, her eyes wide in surprise.

She was a terrible sight. Darkness seemed to bring out all the worst features in Vanessa, giving her the appearance of otherworldliness and evil. Her long slender fingers looked very much like talons; her humped back ever so much more so, the shadows elongating her profile so that she seemed to be stretching out very much like a snake does when it stands on it's tail; her long nose and angular chin gave her the beak of a vulture. She was indeed a sight to behold.

Seia shrank back a little giving a whimper of terror. Jordan woke up only to leap out of bed in terror before he realized what was going on.

"Leave her alone!" He bellowed.

"Jordan!" Seia screamed as he leapt at Vanessa, only to be slaughtered on impact. A ball of neon green fire vaporized him instantly.

"You killed him!" Seia was angry now. The pain and fear combined with the fresh hurt of losing her friend had finally snapped something inside of her. "And I trusted you!" The rune on her shoulder began to pulse a bright red, washing the dark cabin in light the color of blood. More pain seared through her body. Seia felt like she was going to faint. It was comming. Seia almost did faint, as a new wave of terror washed over her.

Vanessa grabbed Seia by her hair and foced her to her knees. "You ungrateful wretch." She hissed. "He was hurting you."

Seia said nothing for a moment, except to sit there and cry. The room spun around her at dizzying speeds. The ground beneath her shook. She was so weak. She could hardly move. Breathing itself was a labor. The pain of Vanessa's nails in her scalp was but a drop in the ocean of pain she was experiencing. Infact the iron grip was probably the only thing keeping her up. "...he was good to me..." She muttered after a time. The beast was comming. It was going to get her... if she didn't die first. Jordan was gone, the pain of the witch's spell was replaced by the pain of the rune. It was hard to tell which was worse.

"You fool! Don't you see he had his hooks in you?! After all I've done!" The witch rattled Seia mercilessly. "I should have killed you." She muttered in exasperation.

"What?" Seia heard that. She was not so far gone as to have heard--"What did you say?!"

"You can't see it bec--"

"I heard that! I heard that! You--! You--! You were going to kill me!" Seia sputtered. She was so angry she could barely see. Without even thinking she drew Qiedra and sliced off the witch's hand. It fell limply to the floor. The witch simply picked it up and refastened it. It would take more then a little poison on a dagger to kill Vanessa. Seia was advancing now, her gait extremely cat-like in grace, her motions smooth as butter, her reflexes attuned. A killing machine.

She had killed Jordan. Jordan. He had been good to her. The witch was going to kill her. Her! Well, now she would kill Vanessa. She had killed others for less. Suddenly she stopped. She was doing exactly what Vanessa wanted. She did not want to be like Vanessa, full of pain and fear and hate. She wanted to be like Jordan. Jordan would forgive Vanessa. He would run away; but he would not kill her.

Vanessa threw back her head and laughed. Chuckled in delight really. This was too good. "I would not have killed you yet."

Seia kept advancing, her shoulder throbbing blindingly and painfully. The witch was satisfied that the rune would hold no matter how hard Seia tried to break it.

"And you will now?!"

"No."

"Why would you kill me?" The tone was dangerously soft, as Seia leaned her face quite close to Vanessa's. The woman had backed herself up against the wall, and was staring back quite unconcernedly.

"Because you must die." Was the profoundly simple, yet profoundly complicated answer.

"Why?!" Seia rattled Vanessa by the shoulders till the witch's teeth rattled.

The old woman chuckled and shook her head. "You would not want to be like them, would you? I killed them." The last part was almost a whisper. "They were tainted. They did you harm." Changing the subject. She did not want to answer the question. It worked too. Seia began to sputter incoherentlyas she drove her dagger into the wall. She really didn't need to use as much force as she did because the blade sliced through the wood like a solid object disrupts the atmosphere. She had meant to drive it through the old hag's head; Vanessa was to swift, like the moving of a shadow.

She had killed them! All of them! Everyone Seia had ever cared for in the slightest bit. Serena and Craig and Evans and--and-- Seia screamed and turned to attack Vanessa again; but the witch was gone. All that remained was the faint whisper of the wind on the trees outside, and the swinging door that spoke of her exit.

The air around her seemed to carry Vanessa's voice 'You are mine. You will always be mine." A mirthful, horrible chuckle followed,"And one day...I will kill you..." The chouckle broke into cruel mocking laughter, and then all was darkness.
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Seia awoke the next morning to find herself on the floor of Jordan's house. She must have passed out sometime during the night. Dead leaves blew around her and scrittled along the wooden floor. The door was still open. It creacked and groaned as it swayed back and forth in the breeze. Seia had a throbbing headache. Her shoulder felt as if it had been beaten many many times with a hard stick. It hurt to even think about moving it. Forget using that arm for awhile.

She sat up and pulled her legs up under chin. She had to think. In one night the world she knew had crumbled about her. Jordan was dead and the woman who had raised her had betrayed her. Infact that woman was going to kill her some day. She had all but promised it.

So... everything she had known was a lie. Jordan and Vanessa could not both be right. But...who was? Vanessa had said that everyone wanted something from everyone else and used everyone to acheive that end. Jordan had said that people were not to be used but honored.

Vanessa had said that doing what you wanted was the way to go. Tit for tat and so on. Jordan had said to do the right thing was best. Vanessa said Jordan just wanted her for her body. He was hugging her wasn't he? That proved it. And yet Jordan had never so much as asked for free love; nor had she given it. Vanessa had said Jordan was manipulating her. Using her to acheive his own ends of self-glorification and satisfaction. He was making her a doormat. Putting her at the whim of others. In a way, he had. She was not to seek revenge. She was to help those who wronged her. But at the same time she could stand up for herself... and she had been earning respect; so she thought.

Jordan had said that Vanessa was making her do bad things. Like killing people and stealing. Well, that was true. But they had deserved it, hadn't they? She had had respect then too though; though of a different sort. People had begun to walk lightly, if not lightly enough. They were hating her too. Vanessa had her hooks in her. She was going to kill Seia.

But if she did, then Jordan was right. If Jordan did, Vanessa was right. They could not both be right. Seia groaned. Her world was gone; the one person she had trusted more than any other was going to kill her; she had no way of telling who was right....

She was all alone...

...And so very, very lost.

One by one the tears finally came. A slow torrent at first, and then a wave of truly heart rending sobs. She wasn't wanted, she had never been loved; not so she could know for certain anyway. The whole village hated her guts, and Seia didn't know if she hated herself too. All she knew was that she had to get away; get away somewhere,anywhere, where there were no people to hurt or be hurt, and where she could sort everything out.

She needed to find the truth.
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"Well, father...That is my story." Seia shrugged as if she had just told him that the sky was blue. "'Told you it was an ugly one."

The kindly old monk had listened with much sympathy and concern for the lost little girl who sat in his humble abode. She was evidently a very confused and hungry child in more ways then one.

"But it is not without hope, my child." The kindly old man returned. "and therefore not as ugly as it seems." He could see that it was late, for the moon was full in the sky. His guest was quite wearied by the emotional effort of remaning so calm. In addition to her present physical condition, she was very much in need of rest.

"Why don't you stay the night? In the morning I can answer any questions you may have."

Seia sighed and shook her head."It is very kind of you, but I must be going. Do not fear for me, I will find some place to rest." She rose and handed him back the shawl.

The old man nodded, but did not take the shawl, pressing it on her instead. She should keep it; it was a cold night. As the girl left the step of his small hut on the mountainside he called after her, "If you ever need me, I am here."

She smiled a grateful smile and dissapeared into the shadows. Odd how she just...blended in like that. Almost like every dark shadow of her pain filled past collected about her in the night and made for her a shroud.
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