| Re-writing His-story. | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Mar 11 2008, 01:54 AM (415 Views) | |
| Big Evil | Mar 11 2008, 01:54 AM Post #1 |
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On TBS. Very Funny.
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![]() Joey Styles, just recently returning from his leave of absence from the BQWA, already finds himself with a work overload. Not that it's neccesarily a bad thing. He now finds himself the host of the BQWA's weekly news-style show, Uncensored, taking a look behind the curtain into the world of the BQWA and professional wrestling. No, not that corny shit Confidential would sometimes cover. But the real things that go on behind the curtain, how people really are, and what really goes on. In the midst of a show, Joey explains the trials and tribulations of the BQWA World Heavyweight Champion, Big Evil. Joey Styles: We've seen many different men of many different styles hold onto to the $250,000 piece of gold known as the World Heavyweight Championship. Usually, most of the stories are a rags to riches story, but not in the case of our current World's Heavyweight Champion, Big Evil. Everyone knows of his rough upbringing in the business, and everyone understands about his past in the BQWA, dating back to the original shoot promo in February of 2006. But that's only half of it. Why is Big Evil the way he is? Why isn't he your "normal" World's Champion? Why isn't he thankful? Why is Big Evil...Big Evil? Here at Uncensored, we caught up with Big Evil at one of the local honkytonks in Dallas, Texas, right across from the Reunion Arena, where Meltdown eminates from this coming week. After a few fancy transitions, followed by brief dark country sounding music and epic shots of downtown Dallas at night, including a shot of the Reunion Arena, the shot fades in on Big Evil sitting on a curb across the street from the Reunion Arena, right in front of whatever Honkytonk he was drinking at this evening. Scratch that. Still drinking at this evening. With a pint of fresly opened Jack Daniels in his hand, Evil looks around at the dark night's sky, and across the street at the bright lights of the shining Reunion Arena. Big Evil: It's amazing, isn't it? How so much tragedy can occur in one small wrestling promotion, causing it to be one of the most storied and historical wrestling promotions of all-time. Suicide, Overdoses, Sex, Drugs, Debauchary. Everything and anything that was stereotypical about the wrestling world took place right in that very arena. Right in these very streets. And more than likely, right on this very curb that I am sitting on, enjoying my Jack Daniels, and the company of the night time sky. Evil looks back up towards the sky after folding back some of the paper bag wrapped around the Jack. He puts the tip of the bottle in his mouth and takes two hard chugs. Most people believe whiskey is an accquired taste. For Evil, he was born with the right taste buds. He brings the bottle back down, barely grits his teeth and wipes his mouth. He just guzzled a nice two gulps of the Jack like it was pure water. He looks back towards the camera, fiddling with the bottle cap in his hand. Big Evil: If you'll recall a few years ago when I first came to this company, I began "shooting" off at the mouth, telling people just exactly what I thought of them. I never backed down from my opinions then, and here before you, two years later, I still feel the same. I don't apologize for what I said, I stand by it. Mainly because most of it still stands true. I guess you could say, much like the way I entitled those promos, I was telling everyone what was wrong with the BQWA. And it's funny that I mentioned how some of the same things still applied to today's standard in this company. Back then, hell, any time in wrestling history, if a man falls in love, if a man lusts after a woman, if a man even has an off-centered thought about a woman, suddenly, he has gone soft. Many say that I, Big Evil, due to my many indiscretions with women, including my ex-wife, and including whatever "school boy" type crush I may have on one, Ms. Kate Harrison, they say that because of this, I have gone soft. Evil rubs his forearm through the rough of his hair, cracking his neck in the process. He takes another miniature swig of the Jack Daniels from his precious bottle, wipes his mouth, and puts it back down. He looks at the stars one more time, this time speaking while looking up at the sky. Big Evil: Since when has it been of anyone's damned business who I'm currently involved with? If it's really of that much interest to the dirt sheets and to everyone else, no, I have no relationship or anything with Kate Harrison. If you want to classify it as a school boy crush, then by all means do so, because I do have an infatuation with her. As far as my relationship with my wife, or ex-wife, whatever she may be at this moment in time, I'm not quite sure, whatever my relationship be with her is absolutely none of anyone else's business except for mine, except for my wife's, and except for our lawyer's. I know, for some of you, it is entertainment, but for me, I mean, this is my real life, you know? This is what I live through every day. Evil readjusts the way he's sitting on the curb, bringing his knees up and putting his arms around them, the bottle of Jack still hanging from his left hand. Big Evil: But as far as entertainment goes, I'd like to personally thank Colossus for keeping my name relevant in today's world of sports entertainment. I mean, after all, how many times do you have to beat a guy before he realizes that he's not in your league, nor on your level? How many times do other people, such hacks as DXKid and Halo, have to beat you to make you realize that you might just not have what it takes? And for the love of god, how many more times do I need to quote Bill Cosby in saying that I brought you into this world, and I can damn sure take you out. Speaking the big game, talking about winning the Rumble, going to Immortals, beating me for the title, why, I take that as a compliment. I take that as you are indeed saying come hell or high water, at Immortals, I'll still be the champion. I'm not denying it because I know it's the truth, but at the same time, the fact anyone in this company outside of my immediate circle believes that astonishes me, and for that, I'm flattered. But flattery is the number one sign of weakness. Evil takes a single ciggarette out of his pants pocket, barely bent or broken, and puts it in his mouth, lighting it up with one swift hit of the lighter. He takes a drag and continues speaking. Big Evil: Add that in with the other dozen signs you've shown, one has to wonder just how much of a chance you do have to make it in this business, let alone the Rumble, or the Road to Immortals. And bringing up any involvement of my life, or the matters of love that surround my life, are both foolish and childish. It proves you're running out of ideas and running out of steam on your supposed non-stop voyage to the top of the BQWA. Good luck, I hope you find everything you're looking for. If you're going to go for it, go all the way, man. And if the path you choose to take just happens to lead right towards me, if just by chance that these threatening words you speak as of late happen to come true, and you do indeed meet up with me at Immortals with the World Title, then so be it. It's just ashame that it's going to have to all end for you like that. That's not a threat, that's not a promise. I don't make either because threat's are useless and even the greatest of promises fall through. It's just the way things are going to happen, because it's the way I make them happen. Evil takes one helluva long drag of his ciggarette, looking back across at the Reunion Arena. After the drag, he ashes it out a bit and then takes another long sip of the patiently-waiting-to-be-drank whiskey that sits at his side. He looks back towards the camera. Big Evil: And as for your little idol, little Plussy boy, you want to talk about me making sure things happen, then lets talk about this little problem you and I have, why don't we? Let's talk about how our match at Resurrection is being billed as the Rubber Match, when in reality, Andrew, this is Game 7 of OUR World Series, it's the end of the end. The series is tied 3 - 3. Let's go back in history. Let's go back to our epic finisher's match on the Meltdown that was personally booked by Roddy Piper, nearly a year ago, in Glasgow, Scotland. You beat me, you did, and you beat me on a grand stage, in front of your home country, and for that, you should be applauded. But then, it got worse for you. The cage match the Meltdown before Immortals, I damn near crippled you. One Last Call, I took your precious piece of gold, and still to this day, hold onto it proudly. Much like all good things, that little streak had to come to an end, and you beat me on the Meltdown after One Last Call. 2 - 2. We fast forward to High Incident, and after I embarassed you, beat you, and had your best friend DAMN NEAR kill you, I took the lead in the series, 3 - 2. Many people would think, hey wait a minute, that's where their series has ended, Big Evil must be drinking too much booze, he's delirious. Just to go along with what he said, Evil takes another long swig of the whiskey. After putting the whiskey down, another drag of the ciggarette follows, continued with it's final ashing out. Big Evil: Wrong. Andrew, let's remember Revenge. You scored that final pinfall on me in the 5 on 5 Main Event to secure the BQWA's place in BQWA history, but that's not what hurts me, no no. Even I, the almighty Big Evil, can take a damned loss. But what kills me the most, what makes the ending to the match more personal than any other loss I've ever had is the fact that you killed, with one sole pinfall, the one thing that meant more to me than anything else. More than any woman, more than any piece of gold, more than any booze, more than any human being. Andy, you killed the EWA. And for this, there's no forgiving. There's no brief time down the line where you and I can shake hands, call a truce, and say hey, it's all in the past. You damn near ended my lively hood, man. And for that...at Resurrection...it will make things all the sweeter when I beat you. Because Andrew, this is it. This isn't just another match before your next title match. No no, my friend. You lose at Resurrection, you get your shoulders pinned, that is all she wrote for you. For the rest of your career, whether it be one minute, one year, or one decade more, you will never...ever, recieve another World Championship shot again. There's no reason for it. Damnit, Andy, open up your eyes. Aside from your disgusting trashbag of a wife, nobody supports you anymore! Not your company! Not the boys! Now, even the fans are beginning to turn against you. I know you can hear it. I know in the hallowed halls of every arena, much like you'll hear on Meltdown this week live from the Reunion Arena, you'll hear the growing echoed sounds of "A Plus Sucks! A Plus Sucks!". And those corny, lame, meaningless catch phrases that the crowd comes up with while sitting at home on their internet wrestling message boards will eat at your very soul like it does to every "Super Hero" that's ever come across this business. Evil crushes out the remainder of his ciggarette and polishes off the last of the bottle of Jack Daniels, tossing it aside, letting it rest up against the curb of the streets of Dallas. Big Evil: All incoherent, half drunken ramblings aside, Plus, at Resurrection, it's not going to be pretty. This may be for the World Title, but let's face it, I've got nothing to lose, and everything to win. It'll be my distinct pleasure to once again put an end to your legacy and your life, but it'll be my honor to once again kill...super man. Plus, like I've said before, like I just told Colossus, there's not a threat or a promise among the words I've spoken, because threats are meaningless and even the best promises fall through. It's just the way thing are meant to happen, because it's how I'm going to make them happen. See you at the Rumble. Evil stands up and walks off down the street in the middle of the night, heading nowhere more than likely. The bar scene is still calling him, but part of him wants to stand there a little bit longer and stare at the history of the Reunion Arena, even though legally, he wouldn't be able to get inside of it. What do the ramblings of this mad man have behind them? Is he up to something? Or is it just the booze talking? |
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| Tara Shannon | Mar 11 2008, 08:55 PM Post #2 |
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That's my Biggie. Drunk and contemplative. Really, you're the rare bird that can mix a good shoot promo with a regular promo with more character development type pieces, and make them all interesting and good to read. |
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| Big Evil | Mar 12 2008, 02:49 AM Post #3 |
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On TBS. Very Funny.
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EDIT - oops, this is my promo. I better get some fucking feedback now
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| TURNCOAT | Mar 12 2008, 04:57 AM Post #4 |
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Guys I'm shaking
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There's just something about your promo's that make me happy in the pants. It's funny, despute all the lies, the screwjobs, the turns, I still can't think of Big Evil as a bullshitter. I'm loving the attempt at turning Plus into Cena (lololololoolo), btw, it's long overdue. And godamnit there is something likeable about this asshole. Keep promoinng godamnit |
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| Midnite Raven | Mar 12 2008, 06:26 AM Post #5 |
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Good stuff there bossman!!
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| BrahmaBull10 | Mar 12 2008, 09:28 AM Post #6 |
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Fun-Haver
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I'm gonna read this a few more times and then metaphorically rip your tool off in a promo, fingers crossed, in a few days. Also, at a time to be determined through consultation and mediation, I will no-sell your mother giving birth to you.
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| Harmony | Mar 12 2008, 09:34 AM Post #7 |
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Gogz once fucked a ginger
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I love when you do these RPs Big, showing off your character's real self confidence. Good stuff. |
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| Ford | Mar 12 2008, 09:41 AM Post #8 |
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You seem unhappy. I like that.
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I love you, nigger. THIS is the Big Evil who I've always enjoyed. |
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7:32 PM Jul 10