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Smell The Legacy; Whacko 4/20/2009
Topic Started: May 22 2010, 12:54 AM (474 Views)
Phenetic
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Killed BQ
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Whacko: Now be honest with me….

Our beloved hall of famer is seated at a dinky card table with a nice stack of cards, placed in his burly hands. On the other side of this horrid excuse of a card table is the fan favorite, Mr. Spanky.

Whacko: Do you have any fives?

Well would you look at that, Mr. Spanky is shaking his head no. I believe we should take a quick peek at what this platyrrhine(primate) actually holds.

The cameraman waddles his way over to the primate and focuses on his cards.

Behold ladies and gentlemen, we have ourselves a lying hairy ape.

Whacko: Go fish? Again!?

Seems to me that Whacko is becoming frustrated with this game and also his opponent.

Whacko: You think? This damn monkey has been cheating this entire game!

Mr. Spanky begins to scream and shout towards Whacko, while slamming his cards on the table.

Uh oh, now we have ourselves a tension episode. Watch carefully, because things may heat up and burn baby burn.

Whacko: Do not start cursing at me dude! I was not the one cheating. Mister Hairy Benedict Arnold.

Now I am not sure how Mr. Spanky can be labeled as a traitor, but Whacko is in that mind set.

The table is shown being flipped over by the enraged primate. Whacko steps back, still holding the cards in his hands.

Whacko: I am so excited that you are being mature about this.

It seems to me that Whacko is being that short pudgy kid with a stick and constantly rattling it across the lions cage.

Whacko: Who in the hell are you calling pudgy?

Whacko quickly dodges to the left as an object flies past his head. The camera quickly pans over to Mr. Spanky who is seen tossing his own feces at his “master".

It is only natural for a wild animal, who has been in captivity, to unleash his or hers wild tactics.

Whacko: I should have went with the pet rock.

One would think, that a man who has issued a serious challenge would be focusing on that certain situation.

The poo continues to fling as Whacko rolls around the ground, barely missing the flying brown, misshapen torpedoes. He grabs, what seems to be a picture lying on the ground, and holds it up in the air.

It would seem to me kiddos, that this man is more then focused………

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eXponent’s Evil Lair
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eXponent is shown pumping out numerous push ups, while staring straight ahead with a face covered in intensity. Nothing exits from his mouth, except the sound of heaving breathing and exertion. Push up after push up. Nothing but pure muscles and focus.

Knock knock.

His out of mind focus quickly comes to a halt and he drops to his knees with ease. The egotistical monster slowly raises to his feet and grabs the towel that was placed neatly on the weight bench. The towel glides across his forehead, wiping away the workout evidence and he casually approaches the door. The vein ridden hand grasps a hold of the door knob and slowly turns it to the opening the position. eXponent opens the door and no one can be seen, except for an envelope lying in front of his feet undisturbed.

eXponent kneels towards the “secret” package and picks it up with curiosity. He rips open the top of the envelope and pulls out it’s content.

eXponent: What the fu….

He quickly releases the content in a disgusted manner and his face fills with nothing but pure rage. The enraged man takes a step back and slams the door shut, while the camera focuses on what was in the envelope and there lies a picture. A promo shot of eXponent, himself, and the photo is caked in monkey feces. On the very bottom of the picture, does not lie a signature, but a somewhat “crude” statement.

You call this a legacy”
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