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Simon Reviews TNA - 2003
Topic Started: Feb 23 2012, 10:00 PM (5,214 Views)
Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

I figure it's best to get some kind of distance with the year 2011 before reviewing that year of WWE. And I've always wanted to do this, since Gogz got the horrible 2002 stuff out of the way. And ROH 2010's downloading is lacking the next few shows as of me typing this. So, here goes!

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002
NWA World Tag Team Champions: The New Church, Since 11/13/2002
NWA X-Division Champion: Sonny Siaki, Since 12/11/2002


NWA-TNA
January 8th, 2003
Nashville, TN


A long long video airs of the events to end 2002. It has Jarrett's title win and Russo's return and formation of SEX AND THEN AJ STYLES ATTACKING JEFF JARRETT airs to open the show. AJ says he deserves to be a Heavyweight Champion, and he'll be all over Jarrett until he gets it. Then Triple X also forms and joins SEX.

Tenay opens the show in the ring with AMW, Ron Killings, and Jerry Lynn. He says he's asked for this time to talk about S.E.X. There's some old retired guys on the floor, including Eddie Marlin, who he says is Jarrett's grandpa. He puts over the guys in the ring as the present of TNA and says he wants to see the NWA continue without Vince Russo. He talks about Russo saying anyone can wrestle in a WCW production meeting, and having to sit next to Bobby Heenan and listen, and that's how little respect Russo has for this business. He says Russo killed WCW and put him out of work for over a year. He pleads with the fans to contact TNA with their feelings on NWA vs. S.E.X. and he pleads with the locker room to stay loyal to the NWA and they need to unite to rid pro wrestling of Vince Russo. S.E.X. then comes out through the crowd from their dressing room. SEX, as of this show, is currently:

Russo, Sonny Siaki, Desire, The Harris Bros, Triple X, David Flair, and BG James

Russo says he wants to get this through Tenay's head and says he's here because he has friends in high places. Tenay says they're ready to fight and Don yells "YOU TELL 'EM PARTNER!" Russo says he's here to save pro wrestling because it's at an all time low. Tenay says that's his fault, but Russo says it's because people like Tenay get to run their mouths, and he produces huge ratings and nobody came to this shithole until he walked in, and now they're doing the best business they ever have. Russo says Evolution is the solution AND IF THEY RESIST, PRO WRESTLING WILL DIE IN A YEAR! Awesome job on that prediction. Tenay says nobody is drinking the Kool-Aid and Russo says if the future doesn't listen to him, they'll be delivering pizzas like jack offs. He then shits on the old people and they try to fight. SEX and the babyface brawl, and SEX gets the best of it, but Jeff Jarrett and the Road Warriors run out to save.

Match #1: Tony Mamaluke/David Young vs. Kid Kash/EZ Money
This is testing me. Short and horrible and Mamaluke's team wins.
*1/4

Triple X hits the ring now, and they lay all four men out. Elix Skipper gets on the mic and says TNA didn't know how to use them and they didn't want to pay them or even put them on the shows, and says the best part about SEX IS TRIPLE X! He says they can't have an X Division without them and this is their house. Jeff Jarrett runs out and they leave. Jarrett challenges them all to singles matches later on and says this is HIS house.

In the back, Lynn and Truth tell Bob Armstrong that they're taking a stand tonight against S.E.X. and Truth says he's the one who named this building the Asylum to begin with.

Match #2: Sonny Siaki [c] w/ Desire vs. Jason Cross [NWA X Division Championship]
Hey, this kinda blew too. Better than the first match though, I guess. Cross is getting booked solely because he has a cool finish of a SSP Legdrop. There is a ref bump and Desire interferes with a low blow and Siaki gets a cradle to win.
*3/4

Bob Armstrong comes out to restart it, but Vince Russo says no, despite not having any real power. He has Don Harris and BG James with him though, and they throw out Cross. Lynn and Truth run out to save and a match happens.

Match #3: Ron Killings/Jerry Lynn vs. BG James/Don Harris
Not great, but they all had a lot of fire and the crowd was hot, so I liked it. The faces have it won, BUT ABOVE AVERAGE MIKE SANDERS DEBUTS AND HELPS SEX FOR THE DQ!
**

They beat them down in a 3 on 2.

Percy Pringle comes out to give a generic legend speech.

Match #4: The New Church [c] w/ Father James Mitchell vs. America's Most Wanted [NWA World Tag Team Championship]
New Church is Brian Lee and Slash AKA WOLFIE D! YES! Really fun brawl to open out. They then isolate Storm. Some good basic heel offense. Really kind of fell apart in the finishing run though, as they tried to make it way too epic and it got really sloppy. AMW feels too inexperienced to this, so clearly they grow a ton between now and the Cage Match in June. They win the titles with the Death Sentence.
**1/4

Match #5: Curt Hennig vs. David Flair [AXE HANDLE ON A POLE]

This sure as fuck happened. Hennig's offense all ruled. Flair was dogshit. Hennig made one of the security guys get the axe handle down for him. He threw it down to Hennig and then hennig threw him out. Hennig has the handle, so he is announced as the winner. FUCKING RUSSO.
*1/2

Flair gets a mystery burlap sack with a rectangular shaped object in it and he lays out Hennig with the mystery burlap sack. Amazing.

In the back, Desire attacks Goldilocks outside of the S.E.X. locker room.

NEXT WEEK: SIAKI VS. RED FOR THE X TITLE! YEAH! West goes nuts for this again. Also, AMW vs. someone. Mike Sanders stops the announcement and storms on to call Tenay a piece of shit and he challenges Tenay to interview Russo next week, and he accepts. YEEEEEEEEEES!

Match #6: Jeff Jarrett vs. Christopher Daniels/Elix Skipper/Low Ki [Gauntlet Match]
So this is clearly MOTN. Daniels is in first. They have a pretty good match. Jarrett was pretty awesome as a babyface. Good bumping and selling and fantastic punches. They do things, and Jarrett wins with The Stroke. Skipper is next. Skipper was not very good, and BG James comes out to do commentary. Hilariously, Skipper botches the flip over the ropes to the apron by bouncing off them and landing on his head. He then just sort of moves on. Jarrett gets a schoolboy to win. Low Ki is in next and it is wonderful. Lots of awesome exchanges between them, and Daniels and Skipper come back out to attack for the DQ.
**3/4

It is a 3 on 1, but the Road Warriors run out to save! They fight Triple X, BUT AJ STYLES RUNS OUT! AJ TAKES OUT THE ROAD WARRIORS FUCK YEAH! STYLES CLASH ON JARRETT! WOO YEAH! AJ talks shit and signals for the belt and Triple X helps him beat on Jarrett, BUT DUSTY RHODES RUNS OUT TO SAVE! FUCK YEAH! Dusty clears the ring to end the show.





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TURNCOAT
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Guys I'm shaking
[ *  *  * ]
I've already done the first few months of 2003 as well :( but yeah I've got no chance at reviewing anymore than one show every couple of months so bash on I guess. Or kill yourself! Either/or
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Big Evil
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On TBS. Very Funny.

Vanish, fiend!
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TURNCOAT
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Guys I'm shaking
[ *  *  * ]
*blows a dude*
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: America's Most Wanted, Since 1/8/2003
NWA X-Division Champion: Sonny Siaki, Since 12/11/2002


NWA-TNA
January 15th, 2003
Nashville, TN


The AMAZING Russo/Tenay interview opens the show. This is where the "YOU WANT LUCHA LIBRES? GO TO JAPAN!" line comes from:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=66N_m_TfD-Y

Coming from that, Russo is in the ring with S.E.X. AND HE LEGITIMATELY STEPS UP ONTO A SOAPBOX! AMAZING! He gets the mic and says this is not the nWo or the Horsemen or any of those old and outdated concepts, and says this is a movement designed to save wrestling. Percy Pringle comes out and talks about Russo begging for a job in the 90s, but he's right, and he wants in on this. Russo offers a handshake but then says he's no different from The Undertaker, Austin, or Jarrett, he's a guy who he MADE INTO A STAR WHO THEN KICKED HIM IN THE ASS ON THE WAY OUT. WOWWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW. He calls him a fat piece of shit, so Percy spits at him. S.E.X. then attacks him and Russo does the "OHHHHHHHHHHHHH YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!" cry. RUSSO HITS PERCY WITH THE ACTUAL SOAP BOX! Percy has a disgusting bladejob, and for the save, it's...it's Jorge Estrada. Hahahahaha what the fuck? SEX kills him too. Jarrett finally comes out with a chair and security to run them off.

TONIGHT: Triple X vs. Jarrett/Road Warriors, Dusty is here

Tenay and West say Red is stranded in Japan, so he cannot get his title match tonight.

Match #1: America's Most Wanted [c] vs. Divine Storm w/ Trinity [NWA World Tag Team Championship]
FUCK YOU DIVINE STORM! This pretty much blew. Not sloppy or anything, just a real nothing match. Trinity does her Moonsault, etc. AMW wins with the Death Sentence.
*3/4

An awesome in theory but horribly produced video airs on AJ Styles' recent quest for an NWA Title shot and highlights of him in action.

AJ Styles comes out to the ring and says he's not with Russo and he's not with Plumtree, and he says he's his own man, and he's the next NWA World Heavyweight Champion. Ron Killings comes out and says AJ doesn't get a shot until after he gets a rematch, and then the bell rings, so I guess this is something that was scheduled. Never got mentioned in the rundown from Tenay and DW though.

Match #2: AJ Styles vs. Ron Killings
Pretty awesome match. AJ is at the peak of his game, in terms of offense. It's insane to think that AJ Styles has been around and performing at a top level for 10 years now. There's probably a legitimate argument to be made for him as one of the best wrestlers to never join WWE, along with Sting. Not a ton of story, but some awesome offense and bumping from both guys. Right as they're going into a probably amazing finishing run, Mortimer Plumtree runs out to distract the ref. David Flair then runs in from the SEX locker room in the back of the building AND HITS TRUTH WITH THE LOADED BURLAP SACK OF DEATH! He pulls AJ on top for the win.
**3/4

In the back, Jarrett and the Road Warriors cut a promo. They say Triple X isn't so tough and Jarrett tells AJ Styles to get in line if he wants a shot. He just beat Killings and has laid Jarrett out several times now, why doesn't he get a title shot? Feels like Jarrett is ducking him. Animal says he'll have his way with AJ soon enough. WHAT A RUSH!

AJ Styles is still in the ring and he gets on the mic. He says he beat Truth and asks what he has to do to get the title shot, and asks Tenay what he has to do. AJ says he's not leaving until he gets a title shot, AND LARRY ZBYSZKO COMES OUT! Tenay is cumming furiously and Larry talks about tradition and says AJ needs some respect and calls AJ a stupid young fool and says he isn't ready to be World Champion. Larry says he's brainwashed by the cancerous cell that is Vince Russo, and says AJ can deny it, but he better not sell his soul to Vince Russo. He keeps it up and AJ snaps and just challenges him to a match and says how about if he wins, he gets the title match. Larry says he could never beat him, so AJ slaps him, and leaves the ring.

Match #3: Desire vs. April Hunter
This was horrible. They blew pretty much every spot and Desire finally wins.
Reverse Pooping

Desire rips off her shirt and pants post-match.

In the back, MR. WRESTLING IV ARRIVES! BUT WHO IS IT?!

Before his match, ABOVE AVERAGE MIKE SANDERS gets on the mic. He puts over Russo and says he is the head of recruitment for S.E.X. Jerry Lynn comes out and says some words. Don't care.

Match #4: Jerry Lynn vs. Mike Sanders
Honestly, I've never seen a Mike Sanders match until now. I just love the nickname. Heavy D Don Harris comes out to help Sanders. The nickname is true, he is slightly above average. Harris keeps pulling the ref out when Sanders is beat, but Dusty Rhodes comes out to fight him off. Lynn then wins with a TKO.
**

Dusty and Lynn shake hands, and Lynn leaves.

Dusty says when he was starting out and all through his career, the marquee said "Professional Wrestling", not "A Midget Beating Off In a Trash Can". He says tradition can't be lost, and people blame Russo for losing jobs and running companies into the ground. He keeps talking about the midget beating off in the trash can, which to be fair, really kind of defines TNA. He tells people in the back to stand up for tradition, not the midget beating off in the trash can. He seems really fucking enthralled with the midget beating off in the trash can. He says he's going to stay here and make Russo's life hell. Russo comes out now and says Dusty never thanked him for making his son a star, as Goldust. He laughs it off and says he used to idolize Flair and Dusty growing up, and Dusty says "You got half of it right, baybeh..." FUCK YEAH DUSTY! He says when he got into the business, he learned how awful they both were. He humiliated Ric Flair, and he wants to do the same to Dusty, and challenges him to turn tonight's six man into an eight man with them in it. Dusty accepts and Russo says if his team wins, then he picks all the title match challengers for next week, and Dusty accepts again. That was amazing.

Match #5: David Young vs. Jason Cross
This was fun. Cross had some really cool offense and Cross took many bumps. Total movefest, but it was mostly cool stuff for 5 minutes or so. Young wins with a pretty good Spinebuster.
**1/4

Konnan randomly runs out and beats on both men, but security takes him out. Okay then.

Kid Kash is named as Red's replacement, and he brings out Trinity to offset Desire.

Match #6: Sonny Siaki [c] w/ Desire vs. Kid Kash w/ Trinity [NWA X Division Championship]
This was alright. Better than Siaki/Cross. Kash took some nice bumps. Desire trips up Kash, and Siaki hits the Siakalypse for the win. Trinity did a great deal of good, clearly.
*3/4

NEXT WEEK: STYLES VS. LARRY

Match #7: Jeff Jarrett/The Road Warriors/Dusty Rhodes vs. Christopher Daniels/Low Ki/Elix Skipper/Vince Russo
Russo is wearing a hockey helmet. Amazing. Russo had some enjoyable stalling in this. Jarrett carried his side of the match, but him vs. Daniels and Ki were both awesome matches. Ki and Daniels bumped around real well for Dusty and the LOD too. Much more of an angle type match than anything really great, but it was fun. It breaks down, AND MR. WRESTLING IV RUNS OUT! HE HITS DUSTY WITH A CHAIN WHAT THE FUCK! HE PULLS RUSSO ON TOP FOR THE WIN! AHAHAHAHA!
**

Posted Image

Posted Image

MR. WRESTLING IV IS NIKITA KOLOFF! NIKITA KOLOFF IS IN S.E.X. BAH GAWD!
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: America's Most Wanted, Since 1/8/2003
NWA X-Division Champion: Sonny Siaki, Since 12/11/2002


NWA-TNA
January 22nd, 2003
Nashville, TN

Match #1: Amazing Red/The SAT vs. David Young/Jimmy Yang/Shark Boy

Average spotfest to open the show. Not sure if this is better or worse than a 20 minute Russo angle. Red is still in his peak period, so all his stuff is great. Yang and Young are also fine enough, especially when Young gets to do power spots. Red eventually wins with the Code Red.
**1/4

Konnan comes back out with a kendo stick, and he lays everyone out. He goes to the floor and yells at Tenay that he knows what this is about. Konnan leaves, and Tenay is confused. As is everyone else.

TONIGHT: AJ vs. Larry, Truth/Lynn vs. Sanders/David Flair

Vince Russo and S.E.X. come out to the ring. He spots a "RUSSO IS A VIRGIN" sign and tells the fans to ask his mother. FUCK YEAH. He plugs the new S.E.X. shirt and says it is the highest selling NWA shirt, which sounds cool, but it is the only shirt they're selling besides a generic TNA shirt. He talks about getting to pick every title match tonight and says AMW will face Low Ki and Skipper of XXX. Siaki will be in a three way for the belt...against one of the trainees who set the ring up and Athena. Horrible. Lastly, he books Jeff Jarrett vs. BG James, Don Harris, and Christopher Daniels in a gauntlet match for the NWA Title in the main event. Mike Sanders says he's been busy recruiting talent, and he has two new guys for next week. He then brings out the S.E.X. AUSTRALIAN CHAMPION, ASHLEY HUDSON!

Match #2: Ashley Hudson vs. Jorge Estrada
This sucked a dick. Tons of botching, and Jorge almost kills himself on a dive. Hudson wins.
3/4*

Match #3: AJ Styles vs. Larry Zbyszko

This was a good AJ performance. I love Larry and all, but I have no idea why anyone would want to see him wrestle in 2003. Or why AJ is booked as a lucky punk kid who has to cheat against a retired guy when he's being built up for a title match. LOLTNA. Larry has good matwork stretching out AJ and AJ then bumps around to make him look great before getting a roll up with the ropes to win.
**1/2

AJ demands a title match once again.

Match #4: Ron Killings/Jerry Lynn vs. Mike Sanders/David Flair
The crowd refuses to cheer the faces and instead cheers all match for S.E.X. and Sanders. This is not a good match AT ALL. Way way too much Flair. Never typed that in a review before. He uses the LOADED BURLAP SACK on Lynn and Sanders covers to win.
*1/4

An insane pretape airs from Roddy Piper talking about how Russo kills wrestlers and he's clearly drunk.

Match #5: America's Most Wanted [c] vs. Low Ki/Elix Skipper w/ Christopher Daniels [NWA World Tag Team Championship]
This ruled! Ki brings a lot of fire and intensity out of Storm and Harris, and Skipper is sort of just along for the ride. AMW really looks like a great young energetic white meat babyface team. Triple X eventually took over and they had a really fun control seg. Skipper wasn't bad, but again, this was totally Ki's deal, really showing how amazing he can be as a heel, which wouldn't fully get tapped into until 2004-5 in ROH. Storm is a good face in peril and Harris has an awesome hot tag after some great hope spots. Awesome finishing run, and Harris gets the Catatonic, but Daniels distracts the ref. Skipper hits him with the title belt and pulls Ki on top to win.
***1/4

Match #6: Sonny Siaki [c] w/ Desire vs. Athena vs. Chris Vaugn [NWA X Division Championship]

This is awful. Desire and Athena brawl to the floor and Siaki does stuff on the rookie. Siakalypse ends it.
1/2*

Siaki and Desire attack them, but Kid Kash and Trinity run out to save.

In the back, S.E.X. are celebrating with Triple X, but Russo stops it and says nobody celebrates until they get the NWA Title from Jarrett and then they will totally control TNA.

Dusty Rhodes comes out with a chain and he calls out Nikita to talk. Nikita Koloff comes out and stands on the floor and Dusty runs down their history of fighting until 1986, when the Superpowers were formed, and he says Nikita doesn't need S.E.X. and they can reform the team. He invites him in to shake his hand and Koloff thinks about it. Russo comes out and says S.E.X. is here to SAVE the business. Koloff thinks about it, but he hits Dusty with the RUSSIAN SICKLE! YEAH! Koloff leaves through the crowd and Triple X comes out again to beat on Dusty.

Worth noting that since this is TNA, a gauntlet match can be advanced with a pin, submission, or being thrown over the top. Except, this isn't run as a gauntlet match, since they're all in at once. Well okay then. Why not call it an elimination match?

Match #7: Jeff Jarrett [c] vs. Christopher Daniels/BG James/Don Harris [NWA World Heavyweight Championship - Elimination Match]
Jarrett vs. Daniels is again great. Jeff starts using a chair on the floor to get rid of the number game, and then BG James has issues with his brother who is the ref, etc. They fight in the crowd and put Jeff on a table after busting him open. Daniels tries a dive off the balcony, BUT JARRETT MOVES AND DANIELS GOES THROUGH! BG and Don control now and it is alright. Jeff's selling is good stuff. He drops Harris over the top and then clotheslines James over! Daniels gets back in now and the other two try to get in, BUT DUSTY COMES OUT AND FIGHTS THEM AWAY! Daniels/Jeff has a good finishing run and Jarrett hits The Stroke for the win.
**1/2

The locker room empties to celebrate with Jarrett and Borash comes in to try for an interview, BUT NEVERMIND THAT SHIT! RAVEN HOPS THE RAILING AND ATTACKS JARRETT! RAVEN WITH THE EVENFLOW! YEAH! RAVEN GRABS THE BELT AND RUNS OUT OF THE RING BEFORE ANYONE CAN GET HIM!

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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: Low Ki/Elix Skipper, Since 1/22/2003
NWA X-Division Champion: Sonny Siaki, Since 12/11/2002


NWA-TNA
January 29th, 2003
Nashville, TN


In the rafters, Raven is standing there with the NWA Title. He says possession is 9/10ths of the law and he has possession of the greatest prize in the sport. He says he's going to put some honor back into this title. He says some call him twisted and insane, but nobody here is fit to judge him. He says he will show Jarrett the error of his ways and he will urinate in his bone marrow and use his decapitated head as a latrine if he has to. He says a wise man once said you remember the things you survive more than the things you enjoy, and what he has planned for Jeff Jarrett will be unforgettable. QUOTH THE RAVEN, NEVERMORE. He walks down to the crowd BUT JARRETT RUNS OVER AND HITS HIM WITH A TRASH CAN! YEAH! He beats him to the ring and they have this fucking awesome brawl. Jarrett sets up a table, but Vince Russo runs out! Raven then throws Jarrett off the top through the table! RUSSO GRABS THE BELT, AND AS THE NWA GUYS COME OUT, RUSSO AND RAVEN LEAVE TOGETHER! Incredible opening segment.

A recap video airs of S.E.X.'s dominance and chaos.

Match #1: Amazing Red vs. Jorge Estrada
Good Red carryjob for 4-5 minutes. Lots of crisp flying around and yeah. Jorge was solid, if unspectacular. Red hits the Infared and follows up with the Red Star Press for the win.
**1/4

Mike Sanders comes out with a chair and offers Jorge a spot in S.E.X. Not sure why, since he just lost. Estrada gives him the finger and hits him. He beats on him, BUT FROM THE CROWD, DISCO INFERNO RUNS OUT AND HITS ESTRADA WITH THE CHAIR! Sanders introduces him as S.E.X.'s head of talent development, Glenn Gilberti!

In the back, Jarrett yells at Bob Armstrong to get him Russo and Raven in the ring.

Match #2: Jerry LYnn vs. David Flair
Short nothing match. Killings comes out to stop use of the LOADED BURLAP SACK, but he accidentally hits Lynn with it and Flair pins him to win. DAVID FLAIR BEATS JERRY LYNN.
*

A horrible sit down interview airs with Tenay and BG James. Basically, he says his family is jealous.

AMW comes out to ask for their title rematch, but SEX comes out. AMW tries to fight them BUT THE ROCK N'ROLL EXPRESS COMES OUT! And then they hit AMW with chairs and join S.E.X. Awesome.

Match #3: Ron Killings vs. Mike Sanders
This happened. Sanders worked the knee and it was average ABOVE AVERAGE. Tenay keeps doubting Truth's loyalty to NWA. Flair comes out with the bag, and Lynn comes out to stop him. He gets on the apron for whatever reason, distracting Truth, and Sanders rolls him up to win.
**

In the back, Goldilocks interviews RNRX. Morton says her tits aren't even real and Robert says they invented sports entertainment. AIN'T THAT RIGHT, RICKY?! THAT'S RIGHT, ROBERT! Bob Armstrong comes over and books them vs. AMW tonight. Hey, no thanks.

AJ Styles comes out and gets on the mic. He asks what he has to do for a title shot. He says he's not with Plumtree, Russo, or S.E.X., and says he's already beaten Truth, beaten down Jarrett, and he pinned Larry last week, and says he can beat him twice in 10 minutes. Raven comes out with the NWA Title and says if he wants a title shot, he should talk to him, but he should consider going back to the X Division, because he's not on his level. AJ asks if Raven has a syringe up his skirt or if he's just happy to see him, so Raven says AJ looks like Elton John's partner ate an N'Sync starter kit. AJ calls for him to just hand him the belt, so he can save some time, go to the back, and shoot some more heroin. RAVEN LAYS THE BELT DOWN AND THEY HAVE AN AWESOME STAREDOWN! AND JEFF JARRETT COMES OUT TO ATTACK THEM BOTH! THIS ALL RULES! Referees come out to break it up, and it allows Jarrett to hit AJ with The Stroke! Jarrett is able to take the NWA Title back from Raven and he leaves. Jeff regaining the belt really should have been drawn out more, I think.

AJ slowly gets up alone, and Larry Zbyszko comes out in his gear. He said AJ impressed him last week and he reminds him of a young Larry, all the talent in the world, but no brains. Larry says he heard him earlier and says if he can beat him twice in 10 minutes, he'll do everything he can to make sure AJ gets an NWA Title shot, but if he loses, he wants to teach him a few things. AJ says no, until Larry slaps him, and then he accepts.

Match #4: AJ Styles vs. Larry Zbyszko [Weird 10 Minute Challenge]
This was good again. Better than last week. AJ makes him look awesome, and he wins one fall with the Phenomenon DDT at around 6 minutes. Mortimer Plumtree now runs out to try and help AJ, but it distracts him. Larry then starts grounding him and blocks all of Plumtree's heel cheating stuff, and the time limit expires.
**1/2

Larry is now AJ's manager.

THE TONY SCHIAVONE SEGMENT: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vtg-HSJT7b4

Match #5: Kid Kash/Trinity vs. Sonny Siaki/Desire
This was like 90% about the girls, so it was terrible. Not that Siaki/Kash would be a barnburner, but it would at least be not the worst match ever. Athena runs interference on Desire, so Trinity gets a schoolgirl for the win.
3/4*

Konnan then runs out and beats up Siaki with the kendo stick. He says this is Tenay's fault and leaves. If it is Tenay's fault and he hates Tenay, then why beat up a guy in the faction that he's speaking out against every week?

Match #6: America's Most Wanted vs. The Rock n' Roll Express
The early part with AMW being fiery was fun, but then RNRX took over and it was just sad to watch. Slow and awkward. Harris has a good hot tag though. They clean house and go for the Death Sentence but Elix Skipper runs out with the tag belt. He hits Harris with the belt and Morton covers him for the win.
*1/2

AMW and the RNRX brawl away, and the New Church runs out to lay out Skipper, and they signal for the belts.

NEXT WEEK: Siaki/Red for the X Title, Triple X vs. New Church for the tag titles

In the back, the camera is in the S.E.X. locker room and Raven is there. Russo demands that Jeff Jarrett gives Raven a title match next week, BUT RAVEN GRABS THE MIC AND SAYS HE WANTS IT TONIGHT! AND JARRETT RUNS INTO THE LOCKER ROOM AND ATTACKS RAVEN! AND ALL OF THEM! Jarrett and Raven fight back out to the ring and it is awesome. Russo comes out to help and Raven hits the Evenflow! He tells Russo to get a table, and he sets one up. Jarrett is able to fight back though, and he shoves Raven off the top through the table. He gets up and gets on the mic and challenges Russo to fight and he gets in, BUT AJ STYLES RUNS OUT FROM BEHIND AND HITS AN ENZUIGURI! AJ HITS JEFF JARRETT WITH THE STRIKE ONTO THE TITLE BELT! AJ PICKS UP THE BELT, AND NOW HE LEAVES WITH THE TITLE! Interesting to note that AJ leaves up the ramp, not through the crowd like all S.E.X. members.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: Low Ki/Elix Skipper, Since 1/22/2003
NWA X-Division Champion: Sonny Siaki, Since 12/11/2002


NWA-TNA
February 5th, 2003
Nashville, TN


Larry is in the ring to open the show and he has the NWA Title on his shoulder. He says his new pupil AJ Styles is deserving of a title match, and Jeff Jarrett comes out. He says he's going to take that title back now, regardless of what Larry wants. He says if AJ wants a title shot, all he has to do is ask. Which AJ has been doing for over a month now, actually, including a segment where Jarrett said AJ didn't deserve a title match. Terrible babyface. Jeff says Larry can give him the belt the easy way or the hard way, and Larry says he always takes the hard way, BUT AJ STYLES RUNS OUT AND ATTACKS JARRETT AGAIN! Jeff fights back though, AND THEN WHAT THE FUCK? LIKE 10-20 DUDES IN ARMY FATIGUES COME OUT AND KIDNAP JARRETT AND PUT A BAG OVER HIS HEAD! They sell it like Jeff has been kidnapped by a sleeper cell.

Gilberti comes out for his match in the terrorist gear, so I guess it was S.E.X. Tenay and West really don't mention this at all.

Match #1: Glenn Gilberti vs. Jorge Estrada
Hey, this blew. Mike Sanders also comes out to do commentary. Match is terrible and Jorge wins with a backslide.
3/4*

They beat down Jorge and pull off the Flying Elvis costume, so he's in his underwear. The crowd chants "USA!"

The lights then go out, and Russo comes out in army fatigues too. He says this was Operation Sex, and they kidnapped Jeff Jarrett for his own good. He says he's going to reprogram Jeff, then the rest of them, AND THEN HE'LL KIDNAP THE FANS TOO! He says he loves Jeff Jarrett, but he's been brainwashed by his dad, who's trying to live vicariously through his son. He tells Gilberti to get Jeff a new gimmick and he says he wants him cursing and thinking about tits and ass and not this tradition bullshit. He says they'll get the fans tonight too, but Dusty Rhodes comes out and clears house with elbows. Dusty calls out Truth, Lynn, Red, and AMW out. They get in and Dusty calls them the other top guys here and he tells them to run things tonight, because he's going to find Jarrett. Wait, isn't Bob Armstrong involved in running the show? He seems to be fine.

Everyone then just leaves Red alone for his title match. Against an S.E.X. member who always wins with interference. GREAT JOB, GUYS!

Match #2: Sonny Siaki [c] w/ Desire vs. Amazing Red [NWA X Division Championship]
Good Red carryjob. Did like 99% of the work with his bumping and selling and then big comebacks. Siaki's best match yet, as a result. Desire shoves Red off the top, and Siaki hits the Siakalypse Now. Great work, NWA guys, cutting S.E.X. off and all that stuff Dusty asked of you.
**3/4

They keep on the attack, but Kid Kash and Trinity run out to save.

Recap of the Konnan bullshit.

A sit-down with Tenay and Konnan airs. Konnan is mad about the major promoters being racists and says the X Divsion is inferior to lucha and he's here to make sure luchadors get their fair shake in TNA.

Match #3: BG James vs. Tenacious Z
GOD FUCKING DAMNIT. This is horrible. James dominates and it's fucking 2003, so that blows. James asks if this is serious and keeps talking shit to his referee brother. Z then gets a roll up and GOWEN FUCKING WINS. AWFUL.
46/Piss

Raven comes out and both men bail. He gets on the mic and says AJ Styles has something that belongs to him, the NWA Title! AJ Styles comes out to the stage and holds up the belt, and Raven calls him down to fight and calls him an arrogant little pussy. AJ comes out and they have an awesome fight. AJ unloads with strikes, so Raven goes out. AJ follows him, but Raven throws him into the post. RAVEN THEN FUCKING STARTS SNAPPING AJ'S FINGERS! Larry runs out with a chair, AND RAVEN GRABS THE BELT AND TAKES TO THE S.E.X. LOCKER ROOM! THAT RULED!

AMW confront Armstrong and The New Church in the back and they say they want the next tag title shot. Armstrong okays it.

Match #5: Ron Killings vs. Jerry Lynn vs. Mike Sanders vs. David Flair [Elimination Match]
This is worked as a tag match, but Truth is still being doubted. They do stuff. Whatever. Killings is the one isolated, which given that the story is whether he's with NWA or not, makes no sense. Killings and Lynn aren't bad. Jorge Estrada runs back out and hits a Missile Dropkick on Sanders and Lynn eliminates him. Lynn cradles Flair to pin him. Truth vs. Lynn is not long, because Flair hits Lynn with the LOADED BURLAP SACK and Truth hits the Gourdbuster to win.
*3/4

Truth and Lynn argue post-match.

Match #6: Desire vs. Trinity
Their men are ringside. This is turrble. Siaki keeps interfering and Kash does nothing. Trinity wins with a Moonsault.
Gogz showering with Ford regularly

Match #7: Low Ki/Elix Skipper [c] vs. The New Church w/ Father James Mitchell [NWA World Tag Team Championship]

This was a lot of fun. Big brawl early on from TNC again, and the crowd really embraced them as situational babyfaces. Ki and Skipper give them some awesome bumps, and it goes all over the place. Really nice chaotic vibe that they gave off. Ki finally has to fake a knee injury to take over. Awesome control seg. Gets a bit nuts in the finishing run with Brian Lee kicking out of many chair shots. They go to a double pin due to referee stuff.
**1/2

The referees declare that due to the ending, the titles will be held up!

Russo comes back out in the camo gear and says Tenay will get the war he wants. The other S.E.X. guys in camo come out and Don says they all look alike to him, but as he says that, the camera only shoots on Skipper. Amazing. Inexplicably, the TNA guys only come out one by one, and thus, they all get laid out. This goes on for way too long, over like 5 minutes. This is the worst faction warfare brawl ever. BULLET BOB IS THE FIRST NWA GUY TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN THE BRAWL. TNA! TNA! TNA! TNA! They fight to the crowd, and S.E.X. locks all the faces in their locker room. Russo is back on the mic and says he loves Jeff Jarrett and Jarrett will be saved. Gilberti comes out looking beaten up, AND THE ONE GUY BEHIND VINCE RUSSO UNMASKS AS JARRETT! He tackles Russo, but then the show ends. Jesus, that was terrible.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: Vacant
NWA X-Division Champion: Sonny Siaki, Since 12/11/2002


NWA-TNA
February 12th, 2003
Nashville, TN


10 bell salute for Hennig. :(

Clips air from after the show cut out last week, with S.E.X. and Raven brutally beating Jarrett with whips and belts and shit. Raven then dropped the NWA Title on him. Tenay says Jarrett will not be here tonight.

Tenay then gets on the mic and says Bob Armstrong has taken a leave of absence as the authority figure, and introduces his replacement, James J. Dillon! YEAH! Before he can say anything, Vince Russo and The Harris Brothers come out from the S.E.X. locker room. Russo cuts a promo on Dillon and calls him a piece of shit, etc. Same idea as the Percy Pringle promo. JJ talks about how Russo begged him for a job in WCW, and when he quit the WWF, he at least did it like a man. The Harris guys go after him, BUT THE FUCKING SANDMAN RUNS OUT TO SAVE! THE SANDMAN JUST SAVED J.J. DILLON!

A recap airs of the tag title issue.

Tenay says there's a tag tournament, and the winners face XXX for the belts. Except with only 4 teams, it is hardly a real tournament. It's AMW vs. RNRX and then Harris Bros vs. New Church, and the winners fight next week.

Match #1: America's Most Wanted vs. The Rock n' Roll Express
This was alright for 3 minutes or so. RNRX seemed more game than usual. Harris beats Morton with the Perfect Plex in tribute.
**

Low Ki runs out and he hits Storm and Harris with his tag title belt.

In the parking lot, Russo is waiting. Raven shows up and Russo asks why his friend, The Sandman, is showing up. Raven is confused. Sandman then runs over and chases Raven into the building with the singapore cane, and Raven locks himself in the S.E.X. locker room. Sandman takes a seat and starts drinking in the crowd.

NEXT WEEK: JARRETT VS. AJ FOR THE NWA TITLE!

TONIGHT: RAVEN VS. SANDMAN

BOTH BY ORDER OF JJ DILLON!

Match #2: The Harris Brothers vs. The New Church w/ Father James Mitchell
This was pretty terrible. Really boring brawling. Ki interferes and the H Bomb ends it.
3/4*

Hype video for Siaki/Kash.

Match #3: Sonny Siaki [c] vs. Kid Kash [NWA X Division Championship]
The cunts are there. This is whatever. There's good stuff, which is good, and bad stuff, which is just fucking AWFUL. They did the worst RVD/Lynn roll up sequence that I've ever seen. Stuff happens and Kash wins with a botched Moonsault. I know Kash isn't really THAT great, BUT FUCK THAT. THE BELT IS OFF SONNY SIAKI. THE DARK DAYS ARE OVER!
**

They debut a segment called INTERROGATION, which is basically just a word association. I'm blatantly stealing this from Gogz's review:

Vince McMahon - asshole, Jesse JAckson - can we all just get along? BG James - Traitor. White men can't jump - true. Are you joining Sex? FUCK YOU TENAY. AH TOLD YA.

In the back, Gilberti and Sanders are interviewed. Gilberti talks about his ideas for new characters, like BILL DING: THE EVIL ARCHITECT! BG James comes over and tells them to focus.

Match #4: BG James/Mike Sanders/Glenn Gilberti vs. Ron Killings/Jorge Estrada/Tenacious Z
This sure happened. Generic stuff, and nothing really bad happens, but no real good comes of this. Truth beats Sanders with the Gourdbuster.
*3/4

In the parking lot, Raven is interviewed. He said apparently Sandman thinks he needs some revenge now, and he gets that. But really, it's not his fault. His wife and him were already separated, so that's not really his fault, and then Sandman's kid only joined in because he thought he would make a better father than Sandman. He says Sandman keeps following him everywhere, and a car pulls up. AJ STYLES GETS OUT AND TACKLES RAVEN! AWESOME BRAWL! Security comes over and pulls them apart, and AJ is holding his hand.

Around the corner, the RNRX have been beaten up and have black hoods over their heads. Well, okay then.

Word association with David Flair now:

Arn Anderson - like an uncle
Vince Russo - gave me my first chance. I DID NOT YOU LYING SHIT YOUR DAD MADE ME
Stacy Keibler - beautiful. Dunno which head was working. lol because of cock
Ric Flair - he never had time for me.
The burlap sack - you'll know when i want you to.

In the back, Steve Corino says he LOVES the old school, and he thought Low Ki did too, and he thought he had the same respect for this whole thing that he does, but he was wrong, so he'll beat the respect into him.

Match #5: Low Ki vs. Steve Corino
OH FUCK YEAH! Corino is young and in shape and it is strange. Ki starts beating the shit out of Corino with kicks and chops and he yells "OLD SCHOOL" mockingly. They have like 5-6 minutes of awesome violent wrestling, in terms of strikes and stretches, and then it ends suddenly when Ki pokes the ref in the eyes for a DQ.
**3/4

AMW comes out to chase Ki, and he runs off to the SEX locker room. They turn around to leave, but The New Church comes out to stare them down.

In the back, Jerry Lynn says he's going to help reestablish the X Division to get back at Russo.

Match #6: Shark Boy vs. Jose Maximo vs. Joel Maximo vs. Jimmy Rave vs. Tony Mamaluke vs. David Young vs. Jerry Lynn vs. Paul London [Gauntlet Match]
Shark Boy/Jose is first, and is about a minute. Shark Boy wins, and then also beats Joel. Rave gets in and is good. He eliminates Shark Boy, and then Mamaluke is in and immediately gets rid of him. AWFUL. Young gets in and carries Mamaluke. Young wins, and then Young/Lynn is good stuff. Lynn wins and London is clearly the best guy in this. Lynn wins with the Cradle Piledriver. The last two pairings ruled, but the stuff before it was a total dumpster fire.
**

Konnan comes out while Lynn is celebrating and he says as Mr. JL, he was the guy who wrestled all his cruiserweight guys from Mexico and Lynn says he was the only one who could make them look good. Ahahahahaha nope. Lynn says Konnan is jealous of not being as good as Rey, Juvi, and Psicosis and Konnan says they are stealing from lucha libre. The SAT then attacks Lynn, and they leave with Konnan. Russo tries to get them to join SEX, but they walk out on him too.

Match #7: Raven vs. The Sandman [Falls Count Anywhere]
Raven in 2003 is nearly as good as his peak stuff, and Sandman is Sandman, so this is good. They bleed and fight, and yeah, it's entertaining. Sort of a mess, in a good way. More of a collection of some great spots, more than some big great story. They go to the crowd and Sandman tries for a balcony dive, but Low Ki attacks him and throws him over the railing down to the floor, and Raven covers to win.
**3/4

Steve Corino runs down and attacks Low Ki, and they fight to the ring. Raven went out to help Ki, and The New Church ran out to also attack Low Ki! Sandman made his way back over with the cane, which brought out SEX. Big brawl, but SEX overwhelms Sandman and Corino, until Jeff Jarrett runs out to save! BAH GAWD HE'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE! He cleans house with the help of The New Church. They chase SEX off and Jarrett gets Russo all alone! BUT AJ STYLES RUNS OUT AND HITS JARRETT WITH THE STYLES CLASH!
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: Vacant
NWA X-Division Champion: Kid Kash, Since 2/12/2003


NWA-TNA
February 19th, 2003
Nashville, TN


TONIGHT: JARRETT VS. STYLES FOR THE NWA TITLE

In the parking lot, AJ Styles steps out of a car, AND VINCE RUSSO STEPS OUT OF THE OTHER SIDE! OH SHIT! Russo is grinning like he's won the fucking lottery, and this is an awesome storyline.

Match #1: America's Most Wanted vs. The Harris Brothers [#1 Contender's Tournament Finals]
This is better than I expected, while not really great. AMW are developing quite nicely, and they show a lot of fire early on. James Storm even does a huge Tope Con Hilo, which is completely unimaginable nowadays. AMW wins with a roll up of some manner.
**

Mike Tenay talks about the AJ/Russo thing and he says AJ has no respect for tradition or this company, when he's been promoted as THE guy in his generation in TNA.

Vince Russo comes out and tells Tenay to get in the ring if he wants answers, and horribly, he does. He says he sat down and talked to AJ, and he says he told him the truth about Jeff Jarrett, and the truth is is that all Jeff cares about is the NWA Title, and this whole "tradition" thing is a front, and he knows Jeff Jarrett better than anyone, and with him, AJ can win the title. He says he is responsible for everything good the WWF did, listing Rock, Austin, DX, Undertaker, etc. BUT FUCK YEAH, DUSTY RHODES COMES OUT! DUSTY PROMO TIME! He talks about how Russo doesn't know anything about wrestling or what he's talking about, and says Russo didn't make anyone, not those guys, not Jeff Jarrett, and he's not going to be the one to make AJ, because he doesn't need Russo, and he warns AJ that Russo will ruin his life. He says Jeff has the very belt that means tradition, and he knows Jeff and he knows that he bleeds tradition. He then brings up the midget beating off in the trash can again. Russo says Dusty hates him because he made his son a star with Goldust when Dusty couldn't get that job done and says Goldust was a bigger star than Dusty ever was. Dusty takes his belt off and says he's going to whip him like his dad should have, but The Harris Brothers come out to attack Dusty, BUT VADER RUNS OUT TO SAVE! WHAT THE FUCK?! AWESOME! Dusty then challenges them to face he and Vader next week!

In the back, Jerry Lynn says that Konnan might be as deadly to the X Division as Vince Russo, and he's going to try and get rid of this problem before it really gets a hold of TNA and his title shot can wait.

Konnan comes out to do commentary.

Match #2: Jerry Lynn vs. Jose Maximo vs. Joel Maximo
This is basically a handicap match and Konnan and Tenay kill the match with their horrible bickering. Some good stuff here, but not really anything special overall. One of the Maximos accidentally Superkicks the other, and Lynn hits the Cradle Piledriver for the win.
**

In the back, Raven is interviewed and he has "SANDMAN MUST DIE" written across his chest. He says once upon a time, he was a sad, bitter, lonely child. There was a void in his life that he couldn't fill, etc. He says one day, he met a beautiful loving woman. And her son, and they became his family. He was finally happy for once, part of a family that wanted him. UNTIL SANDMAN TOOK HIS WIFE AND KID BACK! AMAAAAAAAAAZING! He says he will never forgive him for that, and he wants Sandman to know hurt, pain, and humiliation. He challenges Sandman to walk with him through Raven's Clockwork Orange House of Fun.

In the back, Russo talks to Siaki. Russo says he has personal business to take care of, and tells Siaki to make things go down smoothly tonight.

Glen Gilberti comes out and introduces his newest character, DISGRACELAND! It is a fat man in the Flying Elvis suit, eating peanut butter sandwiches. Horrible.

Match #3: Disgraceland vs. Shark Boy
This was terrible and Disgraceland wins with a Neckbreaker.
1/2*

Jorge Estrada tries to run out, but Disgraceland, Gilberti, and Sanders beat him down. They take him over to the SEX locker room, and they give him a swirly.

A video airs on Jeff Jarrett. Good idea, but it focuses way too much on him being a dick in the first few months of TNA.

In the back, JJ Dillon is interviewed. He talks about how sick he is that a talent like AJ Styles is aligned with Russo, and he's just so disappointed. Larry comes over and says he's going to find out what's going on with AJ.

Match #4: Kid Kash [c] w/ Trinity vs. Paul London [NWA X Division Championship]
Really fun spotfest. Paul London is, and this may be a shock to some people, a complete lunatic when it comes to bumping. Kash had some nice stuff, but he really can't hang with London in terms of spots or sheer insanity. Kash hits the Jay Driller for the win. He calls it the Moneymaker, apparently.
**3/4

In the back, Siaki tries to give advice to all the other S.E.X. guys, and it is awful.

Match #5: Mike Sanders vs. Jonah
Jonah has no last name and is from Tough Enough. So uh, awesome plug by TNA? This was not good. Jonah has generic offense, which is not shocking. Sanders wins with the 3.0.
*1/4

INTERROGATION WITH THE SANDMAN:

Toughest Opponent - Raven
Bud or Bud Lite - Alchohol.
Pick a tag partner - DOn't want to.
Cools or Camels - Non-filtered.
Steel Chairs or tables - lions and tigers and bears oh my
Piercings or Tattoos - both
AJ or Jarrett - Jarrett.
Franchine or Missy Hyatt - ALL WOMEN.
Word Assocciation - Paul Heyman - Character. Terry Funk - walking living legend. Russo - don't know him. Hardcore Wrestling - Sandman. Raven - Sandman.

Match #6: Raven/Low Ki vs. The Sandman/Steve Corino
This was awesome. Big awesome brawl early on. Raven gets Sandman down with a Piledriver through a table, and Corino is isolated. He gets busted open and Ki has some really brutal work on it. Sandman gets back in and there is some good stuff between all four. Ki kicks out of the White Russian Leg Sweep, and sets up another cane shot, but Raven slips in the Evenflow on Sandman for the win.
***

Hype video for AJ Styles going into the main event.

I remember in early 2003, somehow finding a lot of TNA 2002 matches and Ki/Red from ROH that really got me into this style of match, but AJ/Jarrett was the first match, as someone who followed TNA through results and occasional matches that came online, that I really really looked forward to seeing. Looked for that shit on FUCKING KAZAA regularly for about a month until it came online. Same thing with Raven/Jarrett when that was being built up, except that took way longer to find.

Match #7: Jeff Jarrett [c] vs. AJ Styles [NWA World Heavyweight Championship]
This ruled. Jeff is upset about the whole situation here, and when AJ starts showing him up early on, he snaps and starts beating on him. It goes to the floor, including an awesome Jarrett Plancha. AJ takes over because Jarrett is more focused on proving a point. To their credit, Don and Tenay do a great job calling this and getting over the key point of AJ maybe winning the big one way sooner than anyone thought. AJ does a great job getting more confident the longer he can control the match, but that also costs him. However, they never really get to go all the way with this cool story, as overbooking begins. Ref bumps, interference, etc. Larry, the Harris Boys, Vader, and Dusty get involved. Jarrett starts surviving way too much stuff. I like fiery babyface Jarrett, but I don't buy him as a Superman face that you have to damn near kill to pin for the belt. Siaki comes in to hit Jeff with the Siakalypse, BUT AJ WANTS TO WIN IT CLEAN, AND HE HITS SIAKI WITH THE STYLES CLASH! FUCK YEAH! AJ throws him out and climbs up to the middle to tell SEX to leave. Jarrett takes advantage though, and hits The Stroke off the middle rope for the win. I like the idea of the finish, as trying to do the right thing costs AJ, which will lead into something in a few months, if I remember correctly.
***

And suddenly, we cut to Russo in a car. He says this has gone on too long, and he says he's at Jeff's house. He says he's going to talk to Jill and the kids, and he'll see Jeff when he gets home.
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Big Evil
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On TBS. Very Funny.

It's funny because Jill ended up dying of cancer about 6 years later.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: Vacant
NWA X-Division Champion: Kid Kash, Since 2/12/2003


NWA-TNA
February 26th, 2003
Nashville, TN

Match #1: Kid Kash [c] vs. Jason Cross [NWA X Division Championship]

UGH JASON CROSS. Kash is good once again. I'm starting to think he just sucked on purpose in the WWE, for whatever reason. Kash wins with a fancy double springboard Flying Huracanrana and a Tornado DDT.
**1/2

Vince Russo comes out wearing one of the ridiculous early 90s Dustin Rhodes entrance jackets and he says his friend gave it to him. He says Jeff Jarrett might have won last week, but by the end of the night, he would join SEX. He says they all had a good talk last week, and Jeff will sign with SEX tonight. He extends an open offer to the locker room to join SEX, and AJ Styles comes out! He says maybe Russo was right and he should join, but then Raven comes out. He says he came here because he was promised a title shot and the top spot in that group, and he's not taking a backseat to an X Division rookie. AJ says at least he's gotten a title shot, and Raven says AJ could never have beaten Sandman like he did. AJ says Raven would blow up in a few minutes if he ever had to fight the guys he's beaten. Russo then books Raven vs. an X Division wrestler and then AJ vs. Sandman! AMW comes out and says this is great and all, but they want their title shot that they earned. They say they want the shot tonight, or they'll take out Russo. Russo bails out when they come in and they beat on Raven. The Hotshots of Cassidy O'Reilly and Chase Stevens come out in SEX shirts, and they lay out AMW. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

In the back, Dusty says he knows Jeff Jarrett and he knows he's not with SEX.

Match #2: TEAM ME [Simon Diamond/Johnny Swinger] vs. The New Church w/ James Mitchell
Okay, when I was 12 and my friends did this whole fantasy league thing, I tried to find a wrestler named Simon. He was teaming with someone named Johnny Swinger. So...yeah. After actually seeing them wrestle in 2004 on TNA, I realized my mistake. But then hey, fuck it, I used it as an e-fed name and it stuck. Also, I am lazy. That is all probably more interesting than this match. Neither team is really outright BAD, but neither is really good. They do stuff, and TNC are now accidental babyfaces. Brian Lee uses brass knucks to win.
*3/4

In the back, Jeff Jarrett shows up wearing an SEX shirt! MY GAWD! He says he understands now that Russo is just trying to help everyone and he's going to show a tape of what happened last week.

A sit-down interview between Tenay and Sanders/Gilberti airs. This is pretty awful, and repeating their points about ratings and characters and shit.

Match #3: America's Most Wanted vs. The Hotshots w/ Glen Gilberti & Mike Sanders
The Hotshots are really inexperienced and clearly not ready for a push at all, so this is not good. SEX intereference fails, and AMW wins with the Death Sentence.
*3/4

In the back, Siaki tries to direct traffic in the SEX locker room, but nobody listens to him.

Match #4: Raven vs. Julio Dinero
THE FUTURE GATHERING EXPLODES! Julio is a generic flippy guy. Good psychology with Raven taking it to the floor once he got an opening, putting it in his element. He was mostly in control, but Julio got a little offense. AJ Styles ran out and shoved him off the top, and Raven hit the Evenflow to win.
**1/4

AJ claims Raven owes him, in an awesome heel move.

Jerry Lynn comes out for a match, and Konnan introduces his opponent as the man who all X Division wrestlers have stolen from, JUVENTUD GUERRERA! YES!

Match #5: Jerry Lynn vs. Juventud Guerrera w/ Konnan
Juvi wrestles like a face, and Konnan yells at him for it. They have a good face/face cruiserweight spotfest type match. Juvi botches at some points, sine he's in...I want to say his drug phase, but he's been in a constant drug phase for the last 12 years or something. Let's call it his sloppy drug phase, since he managed to be awesome in WWE in 2005. Lynn makes him do the roll up sequence. Fuck you. Lynn gets a bridging pin to win.
**1/2

Konnan yells at Juvi.

Match #6: AJ Styles vs. The Sandman [No DQ]
Awesome brawl! They actually have an awesome mat exchange early on before it breaks down. AJ keeps trying to use weapons first, but Sandman always counters it and kills him with weapon stuff. Great vibe of AJ being in over his head here. He tries a Frankensteiner on AJ, but Raven comes in and hits Sandman in the back with a chair, and AJ hits a Super Styles Clash for the win.
***

Ron Killings is hanging out in the rafters.

NEXT WEEK: RAVEN VS. SANDMAN IN A CLOCKWORK ORANGE HOUSE OF FUN MATCH

Match #7: Dusty Rhodes/Vader vs. The Harris Brothers w/ Sonny Siaki & Desire
Vader is barely getting out of his peak here, so he can still somewhat throw down. On commentary, Tenay says Cody Rhodes just won the Georgia Amateur Championship. Dusty bleeds and has awesome selling, making this better than expected. Vader gets in and cleans house and Siaki gets the Bionic Elbow, which is somehow grounds for a DQ. Awful ending.
**1/4

SEX bails out and Dusty and Vader stand tall.

In the back, Sandman talks to Team Me and proposes some kind of an ECW alliance against Raven, since he left them to join the WWF. Wow, terrible.

Coming back, a table is set up in the ring and there's a "WELCOME HOME JEFF" banner on the ropes behind it. Russo comes to the ring and calls Jarrett out to sign his contract with SEX. Jarrett comes out in the SEX shirt and says he talked to Russo's family like he talked to his, and shows tape of Russo's son talking about how awful of a father he is and says he hates living in Georgia. Russo says he's going to whip his son later, and Jarrett tears off the SEX shirt and hits Russo! David Flair comes to save, BUT SO DO BRIAN LAWLER AND ERIK WATTS! OH MY GOD, FUCK YOU TNA. Watts Chokeslams Jarrett through the table to end the show.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: Vacant
NWA X-Division Champion: Kid Kash, Since 2/12/2003


NWA-TNA
March 5th, 2003
Nashville, TN


Raven is on the balcony, now with a sign saying RAVEN'S NEST, to start the show, and he says nobody remembers the flame more than the fool who gets badly burned, and says Sandman is that fool. He talks about their Clockwork Orange House of Fun match tonight with Sandman, and says once he finishes this, he will focus back on his destiny, and that destiny is to become the NWA World Heavyweight Champion.

TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES!

We come back, and Kevin Sullivan is in the ring. He gives the tradition speech, but this time about hardcore wrestling and brings up Abby, Ray Stevens, Funk, Lawler, Dundee, Brody, Hansen, etc. He says he made his name in the Cow Palace, not in a bingo hall. He says he's here because he wants to see he and Sandman really hurt each other, and to see if Raven is the real thing or just another imposter. Raven rightly says if he's trying to pass a torch, he's a little late, because that torch was taken to him about a decade ago. Sandman then attacks from behind, and runs Raven off. He then starts drinking.

Match #1: Jerry Lynn vs. Super Crazy w/ Konnan
Better than last week's Lynn/Juvi match. Lots of really crisp and cool sequences, even if it was just a lot of moves. Lynn rolls through a Frankensteiner and into a sunset flip for the win.
**3/4

Konnan is mad and slaps Crazy.

A pretape airs with Tenay interviewing Russo. He says after last week, he's going to step back and be the father he always should have been.

Match #2: The New Church w/ Father James Mitchell vs. The Hotshots w/ Glen Gilberti & Mike Sanders
Siaki comes out and orders Glen and Sanders to the SEX locker room. This sucks as a match. TNX wins with a Doomsday Missile Dropkick.
*1/4

The Harris Bros come out and beat down The Hotshots and throw them out of the building. Best thing they've ever done.

In the back, Sandman says he has no idea what this match is even about, but he likes to beat up Raven, so he took it.

Jeff Jarrett comes out and says he had to stoop to Russo's level to get him out of TNA and then Erik Watts, David Flair, and Brian Lawler come out. Watts does all the talking and Lawler just hangs out and yells "YEAH!" at points. Watts says they all hung out as kids and talked about fighting for the belt when they grew up. That seems impossible, given Flair's age compared to the others. Watts says Jarrett abandoned them to further his own career and says he got to be Double J while he was in Tekno Team 2000. Erik says Jarrett is jealous of how good he got early in his career and says Jarrett will regret what he's done to them.

Match #3: Jorge Estrada vs. Disgraceland
Hey, awful! Jorge wins with a move of some manner.
1/2*

In the back, SEX argues. Gilberti brings in the new SEX woman, Holly Wood. Desire is mad about not being the only girl. They all argue.

WORD ASSOCIATION WITH KID KASH:

Ricky Morton: Mentor..
Paul Heyman: Jewish...
AJ Styles: Really good...
Favorite Move: Money-maker...
Toughest X-Division Opponent: AJ Styles...
Trinity - Business or Pleasure: Wouldn't you like to know...
Kid Kash - Cocky or Confident: Very Confident...
Konnan and the Luchadors: Wannabees...
Make War or Peace: Make Love...
X Title Win: Biggest Night of My Life...
Amazing Red: Too Short

Match #4: Kid Kash [c] w/ Trinity vs. Amazing Red [NWA X Division Championship]
Another good Red carryjob. Kash tries to do a variant of the Ki/Red sequence, but he is not fast enough, so it looks super contrived. Really awesome finishing run, and Red takes this totally insane 450 degree bump off a Super German Suplex. Trinity accidentally gets hit with a Red dive when Kash moves, and it allows Kash to hit the Moneymaker to win.
**3/4

In the back, AJ Styles confronts Jarrett and says he deserves a rematch after the way he lost two weeks ago. Jarrett says no and says AJ screwed up and he should live with it and if he wants another shot, he needs to do it like everyone else.

NEXT WEEK: AMW VS. TWO TRIPLE X MEMBERS FOR THE TAG BELTS

Match #5: America's Most Wanted vs. Mike Sanders/Glen Gilberti
The SEX team sucked, but AMW did well. Lots of fire, great look strikes, etc. For whatever reason, Moondog Spot randomly shows up at ringside with his bone. There is a ref bump, and Elix Skipper runs out to hit Harris with a chair, and Gilberti covers to win.
**

In the back, SEX starts fighting and they have a horrible brawl around the building.

So okay, the rules of the main event:

-There's weapons all over the ring
-One of the sides has a chain link wall on it
-To win, you have to put your opponent through two tables off Raven's Nest
-TNA! TNA! TNA! TNA! TNA! TNA!

Match #6: Raven vs. The Sandman [CLOCKWORK ORANGE HOUSE OF FUN MATCH - Special Enforcer: Kevin Sullivan]
This was a total car wreck, but it was entertaining enough. Blood, weapons, etc. I enjoy Sandman's selling a lot. They fight up to the balcony/Raven's Nest area, and yeah. Raven sprays a fire extinguisher in Sandman's eyes and then throws him over through three levels of tables for the win.
**3/4

Raven stumbles to the ring, bloody as fuck, AND HE SAYS HE WANTS HIS NWA TITLE SHOT RIGHT NOW! He says Jarrett should give him that shot now, because he actually has a chance of beating him for once. Jarrett comes out and hits him with the belt and he beats on him. He starts beating him with weapons, and AJ Styles runs out. He gets a chair, but Jarrett moves and AJ hits Raven! Jarrett throws him out, and turning something good into something awful, the Watts/Lawler/Flair group comes out and lays out Jarrett. Why is this happening?
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: Vacant
NWA X-Division Champion: Kid Kash, Since 2/12/2003


NWA-TNA
March 12th, 2003
Nashville, TN


To open the show, Jarrett attacks the SEX locker room with a bat and demands Erik Watts, but security makes him leave.

Match #1: Jerry Lynn/David Young vs. Halloween/Damien 666 w/ Konnan
This was promising, but then David Young blew out his knee and got stretchered out, so it turned into a handicap match, and was really a huge mess. Lynn wins with a cradle.
*3/4

Konnan attacks Jerry Lynn finally, and they pull him off.

In the parking lot, Erik Watts arrives and Jeff Jarrett runs on and attacks him. Security again pulls him off, and Watts goes to the ring. He brags about being in Jeff Jarrett's head, and Jarrett breaks free of security, and he runs to the ring, and Watts bails. This is really horrible.

In the back, Kid Kash is interviewed. He says there's nobody who can take the X Division Title away from him and he's going to beat two men tonight, but Red comes up and says he wouldn't have won that title at all without Trinity, let alone beat him last week. Kash tells him not to eye his belt and Red challenges him to leave her in the back, but he shakes his head.

TONIGHT: HE IS FREE!

D'LO BROWN COMES OUT! AWESOME! Tenay says D'Lo is guaranteed one NWA Title shot at some point due to his contract. He give the usual speech about politics and shit. Sonny Siaki comes out and tries to get him to join SEX, but D'Lo says no. Siaki says Russo would want him in, but he says no again and says they've never even met before. D'Lo says he's his own man and Siaki calls him stupid, so D'Lo hits the Sky High and the Lo Down.

TONIGHT: AJ VS. RAVEN IN A #1 CONTENDER'S MATCH

Match #2: Kid Kash [c] w/ Trinity vs. Amazing Red vs. Jonny Storm [NWA X Division Championship]
Great Red performance when he was in. The Storm/Kash parts were awful though. Trinity hits Red with the Moonsault on the floor, but then she eats a dive from Storm after Kash dodges again. Kash then hits the Moneymaker back in the ring, but not until they do some roll ups. They really should have just gone right into it in order to emphasize Trinity's impact.
**1/2

Red confronts Trinity on the floor, but then Kash attacks Red from behind with the belt, and they leave.

In the back, Siaki asks the SEX guys where they were earlier, but they all yell at him to shut up. Siaki and Sanders brawl but it gets broken up. Gilberti gives a big speech about how they can dominate like the superstars they are, and doubts XXX's loyalty, since they keep going to Japan. Daniel says they're carrying the SEX banner all over the world, and everyone seems to support Gilberti as the new leader. Horrible.

Match #3: The Harris Brothers vs. The Sandman/Steve Corino
The match began while Sandman was coming through the crowd, and in 25 seconds, Corino is beat with the H-Bomb.
FUCK EVERYTHING

They then lay out Sandman when he gets to the ring. What the fuck?

In the back, Gilberti gives Sanders a speech tonight about how he has to get the win tonight and keep their SEX winning streak going.

Dusty Rhodes comes out and calls out the new generation guys, and they come out. Dusty says he's not here for a fight, and he wants to talk to them, because he's known them all a long time. He says he likes Brian's dad and Erik's dad, so he doesn't get this, but David Flair turning out this way isn't that shocking, since his dad has always been this way, and David Flair has become a real big ASSHOLE. He says Jerry Lawler was the King of Memphis, and if Brian Lawler wanted to actually work and put some effort in for once, he could inherit that crown. He praises his skill and charisma, while also mocking his horrible dancing. They then attack Dusty, but Jarrett and D'Lo run out to make the save.

In the back, Triple X is interviewed about finally having to fight AMW again for the vacant tag titles. Low Ki refuses to answer which two of them it will be, and says they've been busy going to Japan and being successful as they hold up the Triple X and SEX banners, and it isn't their fault that they're in such high demand. Ki says they never lost the belts to begin with and the cowboys are in for a world of hurt.

Sanders comes out and dedicates this match to Vince Russo.

Match #4: Mike Sanders vs. Jim Duggan
This was HORRIBLE. Duggan wins with the Three Point Stance Clothesline.
1/4*

Glenn Gilberti comes out and yells at Sanders. Hacksaw HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO's it up, but Gilberti and Sanders then attack him.

In the crowd, AJ Styles is sitting in Raven's Nest and has Goldilocks with him to do his usual interview. She asks if he's trying to provoke Raven and he says he's provoking Raven, obviously, and he'll take a shit in his Nest if he has to. He says he wants no doubt that once he beats Raven and then Jarrett, that AJ Styles is the best. Raven comes over, AND AJ THROWS HIS CHAIR IN HIS FACE! Raven goes to fight, but SEX comes out to hold Raven back.

A video airs on the tag title situation.

Match #5: America's Most Wanted vs. Low Ki/Christopher Daniels w/ Elix Skipper [NWA World Tag Team Championship]
Ki and Daniels wait until the opening bell to reveal that they're the two who will be in the match. Which is great, since they're clearly the best team of the two. This was fucking great. Fun brawl to begin, and then XXX took over. They again gave off this great vibe of AMW seeming totally overwhelmed by the cheating and experience. Not as good as the Ki/Skipper vs. AMW match, which makes no sense, but that had a more violent XXX control seg. Awesome finishing run of interference and nearfalls. This time, Harris is able to dodge the belt shot from Daniels, and he hits him with it! The ref sees him with the belt and takes it from him, allowing Ki to hit him with the other belt, and he pulls Daniels on top to win.
***

In the parking lot, Siaki attacks D'Lo Brown, but Jarrett runs over to save.

A horrible segment happens with Holly Wood and TNA dancer Lollipop fighting, and Lollipop's sub-par tits get exposed.

Jeff Jarrett comes out to do commentary.

Match #6: AJ Styles vs. Raven [#1 Contender's Match]
Hey, this was really good. Unfortunately, it was only like 8-9 minutes and basically an angle to set up for next week, which stopped it from really as great as they're capable of. AJ bled early on after Raven jumped him on the floor with a chair shot in revenge for earlier. They had a great story with AJ panicking at points and trying high risks before Raven was worn down enough, and Raven using experience to always counter them. They then start doing overbooking bulllshit. Raven cheap shots Jeff, and he then attacks Raven and AJ and is ejected. The ref is then hit by AJ coming off the top when Raven moves and Raven hits the Evenflow. A new ref is RIGHT THERE as he hits it, and AJ still kicks out at 2. That should have been saved for the match with Jarrett. That ref is then hit. They keep fighting and Raven hits AJ with a chair while AJ hits him with an Enzuiguri. They fall into a double pin and both referees count three.
**3/4

The winner is disputed to end the show.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: Triple X, Since 3/12/2003
NWA X-Division Champion: Kid Kash, Since 2/12/2003


NWA-TNA
March 19th, 2003
Nashville, TN


Jim Duggan wishes the troops good luck.

Gilberi, Siaki, and the Harrises come out and Gilberti calls out D'Lo Brown to talk, and D'Lo comes out to the ring. He says Jeff Jarrett is a liar and a manipulator, and he is using him and pretending to be his friend. He told him to reconsider joining SEX, because they have a mutual friend in their leader and role model Vince Russo. He says there might be a glass ceiling in the WWE, but in a TNA where Jarrett is allowed to roam free, there's a concrete ceiling, because Jeff is a paranoid egomaniac who has manipulated people into fighting his battles for him, and he doesn't want D'Lo to be another of them. Jeff Jarrett comes out and says the Russo that they were both friends with isn't there anymore, and he's gone totally insane with this SEX thing. D'Lo says all he wants is his title shot, but then the 2nd generation assholes come out and they attack Jarrett. D'Lo saves, as do AMW and Dusty. SEX then attacks them, but Ron Killings returns to save and the faces run off SEX.

TONIGHT: AJ VS. RAVEN IN A #1 CONTENDER'S LADDER MATCH

It is announced in the next match that any XXX combo can defend the belts. Fuck yeah!

Match #1: Low Ki/Elix Skipper [c] w/ Christopher Daniels vs. The New Church w/ Father James Mitchell [NWA World Tag Team Championship]
This is good, once more. Good brawl to begin. XXX then took over for an awesome control seg. Ki was brutal and violent as usual. Skipper's strikes still blow, but he had some great looking offense. Lee's hot tag was not much, but XXX bumped around really well. Daniels kept interfering, BUT OH GOD, MALICE MAKES HIS RETURN TO SAVE! The ref sees it though, so XXX wins by DQ.
**1/4

Malice Chokeslams every XXX member, and then the referee too.

A horrible Tenay and Erik Watts interview airs, with Erik refusing to say why he's in TNA.

In the back, Gilberti talks to SEX and yells at Sanders for losing last week and embarrassing SEX. He then tells Holly Wood to get Athena to show her tits tonight, or she's fired.

Q & A WITH KONNAN:

Jerry Lynn: Punk Ass Bitch..
Tracy McGrady or Kobe Bryant: Kobe's a ballhog, Tracy McGrady..
Eric Bischoff: Punk Ass Bitch..
Retro Jerseys or FUBU Gear: Retro Jerseys, leave FUBU for Buff Bagwell & DDP..
Max Moon: The Best..
Eminem of 50 Cents: Eminem..
El Santo or Mil Mascaras: El Santo..
Christina Alguilara & Jennifer Lopez: Both, face down ass up..
Rey Mysterio: League by himself..
AJ Styles or Raven: Doesnt care for either..
Luchadores win-loss record: Konnan takes a fit and storms off

Match #2: Jerry Lynn/Jason Cross vs. Konnan/Juventud Guerrera
Again, the Lynn/Juvi stuff was good. Cross is average, and Konnan is awful. Konnan beats Lynn by grabbing the ropes.
*3/4

Video of all the Kash/Red/Trinity stuff.

In the back, Kash and Trinity are interviewed. Kash says that's how this works, she takes a bullet if she wants to hang with the champ, and he's the champion because he's the best. Red then comes over and challenges one of them for a match and says he has no respect for Kash, but he says he doesn't care. Trinity accepts, and Kash makes fun of him for fighting a girl, so Red challenges him to make it a three way, and he accepts.

Match #3: Jim Duggan/Moondog Spot vs. Glenn Gilberti/Mike Sanders
OH MY GOD SO BAD. SO BAD. Gilberti walks out, and then Spot hits Sanders with the bone. Duggan hits the Old Glory Knee Drop to win.
45/ASSHOLES OF MEN

In the back, Father James Mitchell challenges Triple X to a SADISTIC MADNESS MATCH. Whatever that is.

Match #4: Kid Kash [c] vs. Trinity vs. Amazing Red [NWA X Division Championship]
This was basically just Kash vs. Ted again, as Kash refuses to let Trinity wrestle and yells to stay on the apron, but she keeps getting knocked off. She's ugly and not a good wrestler, but credit to her, she takes some killer bumps. Kash thew Trinity into Red and then rolled him up to win.
**1/4

Video for the awful six man.

Match #5: Jeff Jarrett/D'Lo Brown/Dusty Rhodes vs. Erik Watts/Brian Lawler/David Flair
The faces were actually fine here. Nothing wrong with anything they did, and all of them looked good on offense. BUT OH MY GOD, THE HEELS WERE TERRIBLE. Horrible bumping, offense, selling, etc. Really everything heels should do, that PRO WRESTLERS SHOULD BE ABLE TO DO, they cannot do. They suck at doing. Jarrett beats Flair with the Stroke.
*1/2

Jeff celebrated on the ropes, AND RON KILLINGS RAN OUT AND POWERBOMBED HIM OFF THE ROPES! YEAH! The heels beat on them, and Dusty bleeds. Watts drags Jeff out to the parking lot with a noose. He attaches the other end to his car and teases murdering him, but then says he doesn't want to go to jail and only wants to get in his head. Oh my god, terrible. The Killings heel turn got buried by this? Fuck you, TNA.

In the back, The New Church tries to jump Triple X, but that was stupid, as the other SEX guys run on and attack them. They lay out Malice with a 6 or 7 on one, and people have to stop it.

Horrible segment with Holly Wood and Athena. Siaki interferes, but David Young saves. DON'T GIVE A SHIT.

NEXT WEEK: XXX/HARRIS BOYS VS. NEW CHURCH/?, LYNN VS. KONNAN

Match #6: AJ Styles vs. Raven [#1 Contender's No DQ Ladder Match]
AJ jumping Raven to start and dominating with weapons was a nice bit of character progression after being dominated before. AJ came off as resourceful and dominating and more at home with the ladder, and Raven basically had to pull veteran tricks out of his ass to stay alive. Or pull out more insane weapons, like a staple gun. Raven pulling the ref onto him on the table as a shield, but AJ going through with it anyways and hitting them both with a Flying Legdrop was cool. AJ has it won after that, but Gilberti runs out and Powerbombs him down over the top and through a table on the floor. Raven then slowly gets back in, and climbs up to get the contract to win. Not perfect, but enough cool stuff to pull it through.
***
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TURNCOAT
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Guys I'm shaking
[ *  *  * ]
Wtf malice?! He's supposed to have died by now
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: Triple X, Since 3/12/2003
NWA X-Division Champion: Kid Kash, Since 2/12/2003

NWA-TNA
March 26th, 2003
Nashville, TN


Goldilocks sings one of the worst versions of America The Beautiful ever.

NEVERMIND THAT SHIT, BECAUSE AJ STYLES WALKS THROUGH THE CROWD WITH A FUCKING CHAINSAW TO GET THROUGH THE S.E.X. LOCKER ROOM DOOR! AMAZING! He gets in, but sadly, he stops. He calls them all pathetic scum, and says they're nothing without Russo and he was stupid for even wanting into this at all. He tells one of them to fight him in the ring in 30 seconds, or he's coming back to cut one of their arms off. He then calls Gilberti a faggot and leaves. Gilberti tells Sanders to do it.

Match #1: AJ Styles vs. Mike Sanders
Best Sanders match yet, but entirely to AJ being AJ. Sanders still blows, but AJ has some amazing offense and takes huge bumps. During this match, Tenay says Raven has the week off to recover from his grueling last three weeks. They try to work a cool spotfest, but Sanders is totally outclassed. Gilberti and Siaki try to interfere, but it fails and AJ gets a roll up to win.
**1/2

Gilberti and Sanders almost fight, but Siaki calms it down.

Match #2: Jerry Lynn vs. Konnan
This was horrible. Lynn got a roll up to win.
*1/2

A mystery luchador in yellow runs out and hits Lynn with a Swinging DDT.

Jeff Jarrett apparently isn't here either, as he is at a charity event. Generic pretape with him putting over all his top challengers.

A video package airs on Raven.

The New Church comes out with Father James Mitchell, and Tenay says Malice was injured as a result of the attack by SEX, and says Low Ki was also injured by Malice in the ring. Mitchell says the only rule in the SADISTIC MADNESS~ match is that you cannot be pinned until you are bleeding, and then it ends by pin or submission. The Harris Boys, Daniels, and Skipper come out and Daniels says that SEX is a better religion than whatever they have, and as the Fallen Angel, he would know. SEX then attacks them, since it's 4 on 2. The Sandman runs out to save, AND SO DOES PERRY SATURN! FUCK YEAH! They will apparently be the mystery partners!

A pretape airs with Dusty Rhodes and he says a lot of people talk about him being the old BULL OF DA WOODS who won't just leave well enough alone, but he does it because he loves tradition, and he's going to beat David Flair down in the Bunkhouse Match tonight. He says while he was growing up in that big house on the big side of town, his daddy never had time to teach him respect, so he'll have to beat respect into him, just like he beat it into his daddy. Great promo.

Match #3: Sonny Siaki vs. David Young w/ Athena
This is about a minute before Desire comes out to have a catfight with Athena and the match just kind of ends.
1/4*

Siaki lays out Young and Athena and they leave. Awful.

Erik Watts and the other awful guys come out and Watts says he doesn't want a title shot, but the lights go out. They come back on, and Jarrett hits him with a guitar, and the other two bail. Jarrett asks how that was for getting inside his head and he gets on the mic. He issues an open challenge, AND D'LO BROWN COMES OUT! He says he wants his title shot tonight, not a singles match vs. Chris Harris like they gave him, and Jarrett should get used to people running and chasing after him because he's got that belt. Jarrett says he doesn't usually give out hand outs, since D'Lo hasn't earned anything, but he accepts. SEX then comes out before the bell can ring and says Raven is the #1 Contender, NOT D'Lo! He says they can forget about that and D'Lo can have a shot next week, but only if he agrees to join SEX if he wins! Wait, what? Gilberti has no power to book that, but D'Lo accepts! Jarrett says by the end of the night, Gilberti will know the meaning of "Don't Piss Me Off". Really don't think that's a vague statement or anything, but okay.

David Flair has his own NWA Title belt with him, presumably stolen from his dad.

Match #4: Dusty Rhodes vs. David Flair [Bunkhouse Match]
Dusty ruled in this, but Flair was still horrible. Dusty eventually won with the cowbell shot. Fuck yeah.
*1/4

Dusty took the NWA Title from David, but Brian Lawler ran out and got a low blow, and he ran to the back with the stolen belt.

In the back, Goldilocks interviews AMW about Harris taking a singles match. He says this isn't the end of AMW, it's just one night, and he wanted to try it out, and tells her to stop stirring the pot. Harris walks off, and Storm does not look pleased.

Match #5: Kid Kash/Trinity vs. Amazing Red/Alexis Laree
Red carries it again, but there's way too much of the women as compared to the men. Young Mickie James also shows promise. They do some stuff, and Trinity beats Laree with a shitty Moonsault.
**

Kid Kash yells at her for stealing his spotlight, and he walks out on her.

In the back, Lynn is interviewed about the masked man, and he says he has no idea who it was, but he bets Konnan knows.

Match #6: D'Lo Brown vs. Chris Harris
This was good stuff. Not great, but really solid. A lot of good exchanges before booking began. The ref is bumped, and then both men miss big moves off the top. Glenn Gilberti then came out and he hits Harris with the Chartbuster/Last Dance. D'Lo sees him rolling out, but covers anyways, and gets the win. Acceptable tease of him maybe joining SEX.
**1/2

Match #7: Christopher Daniels/Elix Skipper/The Harris Brothers vs. The Sandman/Perry Saturn/The New Church w/ Father James Mitchell [SADISTIC MADNESS MATCH]

Triple X finally has their awesome theme music. This is apparently fought under legal man tag rules. Makes sense. Saturn sucks by 2003 and Skipper isn't much tonight, so Daniels and Sandman are really the only good ones in this. This was pretty much just a large mess. SEX dominates, and hey, here comes Ron Killings, who turned heel last week, to save for the faces. He points to the entrance, AND FUCKING VISCERA COMES OUT TO HELP HIM. AHAHAHAH WHAT?! He hits Daniels with a Liger Bomb, and Saturn covers to win. God fucking damnit, this was ridiculous.
*3/4

Sandman hands them all beers and Truth and Viscera just sort of leave. The rest of SEX comes out to attack the winning team, but Jarrett runs out, and he runs them all off with a chair. D'Lo comes out to the ring to talk to Jarrett, but before he can do anything, Jarrett also hits him with a chair to end the show. Terrible episode.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: Triple X, Since 3/12/2003
NWA X-Division Champion: Kid Kash, Since 2/12/2003

NWA-TNA
April 2nd, 2003
Nashville, TN


Glenn Gilberti comes out to open the show, and he calls out D'Lo Brown to talk, and talks about Jarrett is going to turn his back everyone soon enough, and D'Lo needs to do it before Jarrett does, and says SEX has his back. Instead, AJ Styles runs out, and he attacks him. They brawl, and it is awesome on AJ's end. Raven comes out, but instead of helping Gilberti, he just sits down in the corner and watches, and Tenay now mentions that Raven was originally supposed to get his title shot tonight, but it was given away, which they really should have mentioned last week. Referees and D'Lo Brown then come out to break it up, and Raven is upset with this. They get AJ out and Raven jaws with Gilberti. D'Lo gets back in, and he starts talking shit with Raven and the rest of SEX comes out to separate them.

A video airs with Lynn talking to Konnan in the back. Lynn talks about how much he respects lucha libre, and they shake hands and agree that the X Division is an extension of lucha libre and Konnan promises no more problems. Konnan says he was behind the mystery luchador last week, but he won't do it again. Weird segment.

Up in Raven's Nest, Goldilocks interviews Raven. He says he's known since childhood that his destiny has been to be NWA Champion, and the timelines almost matched up perfectly a few years back, but it was not to be, and he just looks at the camera and says "Thanks, Shane." He says he thrives on this adversity, and he's been called insane or crazy. The crowd won't stop cheering him, so he yells at them for talking over him and yells that he has a destiny to try and turn them on him. He says he doesn't care who he wins it from or when or where, and all that matters is that it will happen.

Match #1: Chris Harris vs. Brian Lawler w/ David Flair
Harris was fine here, I suppose. Interference gives it to Lawler.
*1/2

They double team him until Dusty comes out to save. Dusty challenges them to fight and wants Lawler in any kind of match he wants for that belt he has no business carrying, and Lawler says he'll do it if it's a LADDER MATCH! Dusty accepts. FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.

In the back, Goldilocks interviews Saturn and Sandman. Saturn asks where SEX gets off calling themselves extreme, and says you can't join a revolution after the war's already been fought. The NEw Church comes over and Mitchell says as repayment for last week, they can have either one of them for their six man tonight. Sandman says they've got it covered. Mitchell then says he might have to take it into his own hands then, and Saturn says he doesn't know if that's a threat or what, but if he wants, he can bring his shit.

Match #2: Alexis Laree vs. Trinity
Raven randomly came out and sat in the corner. This was not good at all. Trinity wins with a Moonsault.
3/4*

Raven hits Trinity with the Evenflow. Kid Kash came out to save maybe, but then didn't do anything. Raven then carries Laree to the back.

In the back, Slut interviews Jarrett about how he's changed lately. Jeff asks for names and Goldilocks talks about him faking being at a charity event last week. Jarrett says if she wants to be one of the boys, he'll treat her like one, and he chokes her and tells her to watch her tongue around him, and then walks off.

Everyone comes out for the six man, AND NEW JACK IS THE THIRD MAN! YEAH!

Match #3: The Sandman/Perry Saturn/New Jack vs. Christopher Daniels/The Harris Brothers
This was less bad than last week's Biggie's ECW reunion match, I guess. The New Church interferes and throws NEw Jack off the balcony. Makes no real difference, as Saturn beats a Harris with the DVD.
**

BART GUNN THEN RUNS IN AND GERMAN SUPLEXES SATURN. WHAT THE FUCK. Gunn has an SEX shirt on. NOOOOOOOOOO. Also, his name is Mike Barton now.

In the back, Kid Kash says he's going to show Trinity where her place is.

Match #4: David Young vs. Sonny Siaki w/ Desire
This was horrible. Young wins with the Spinebuster.
*1/4

Athena runs out and throws Desire in, and Young hits the Spinebuster on her too.

A video airs on Ron Killings.

Match #5: Ron Killings vs. Elix Skipper
This had potential, but Elix dragged it down with his really sloppy performance tonight. Truth was looking really good though. Big bumping, great dive, etc. Killings wins with a Super Gourdbuster.
*3/4

Daniels runs out to attack Killings, but Nelson Knight (Viscera) comes out to save.

They hype up next week's show and West is blatantly reading his script on the table.

Match #6: Kid Kash [c] vs. Jerry Lynn [NWA X Division Championship]
This happened. Generix X Divisionish match. Nothing awful, but nothing overly great. Lynn's comeback punches are really lame. Ref bump, and then yeah. Mystery luchador comes out and again hits Lynn with the Swinging DDT, and Kash covers for the win.
**1/2

Hype video for Jarrett/D'Lo.

Match #7: Jeff Jarrett [c] vs. D'Lo Brown [NWA World Heavyweight Championship - If Brown Wins, He Joins SEX]
Good stuff. Gilberti comes out to watch and they have a nice brawl to fight back. They sort of jump right into the big epic finishing run without a middle portion, so it's not quite great. This also doesn't feel heated enough to warrant a finisher theft portion. Ref bumps happen, and SEX interferes. Raven comes out too, but again just sits in the corner. Sanders accidentally kicks D'Lo and Jeff hits The Stroke to win.
**3/4

Raven gets up and he and Jarrett go nose to nose. Security comes out to break it up and SEX comes out in full to stand in front of Raven, BUT RAVEN STARTS THROWING THEM OUT AND CHALLENGES JARRETT TO FIGHT! YEAH! Jarrett goes to fight and gets some punches but then Alexis Laree randomly comes out and jumps on Jeff's back. Jarrett then KILLS her with a chair shot, and the show cuts out.

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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: Triple X, Since 3/12/2003
NWA X-Division Champion: Kid Kash, Since 2/12/2003


NWA-TNA
April 9th, 2003
Nashville, TN

Match #1: The Sandman/New Jack vs. The Harris Brothers vs. The New Church w/ James Mitchell [ARMED ASYLUM MATCH]

This is basically No DQ, but with weapons hidden all over the building. Fun enough garbage brawl. New Jack makes people bleed, Sandman is Sandman, etc. Interestingly, Sandman is wearing a Raven shirt. Slash had good balcony dive, and then when Brian Lee is tossed off a balcony, he totally misses the fucking table and just DIES. New Jack goes off brawling, leaving Sandman all alone, and horribly, Sandman is beat with the H Bomb.
**1/2

In the SEX locker room, Mike Barton brags about knocking out guys in Brawl For All. 5 years ago. D'Lo Brown barges in during this and wants a match with Mike Sanders for costing him the title last week. He was not there, but then Chris Harris was randomly hanging out in the SEX locker room. Gilberti tells D'Lo he'll get him Sanders and he tells Harris to go find him. What is this?!

On the stage, Tenay announces the main event, which will be a four way tag match. The winning team will then have a match in the coming weeks, and whoever wins that singles match will be #1 Contender for the X Title. Borders on overly complicated, but I can buy into it. Tenay says XXX will be in, and says if they don't win the match, then they have to defend the tag titles against the winning team.

In the parking lot, Raven shows up, and now has Alexis Laree and Julio Dinero with him. THE GATHERING!

INTERROGATION WITH DUSTY RHODES:

TONIGHTS LADDER MATCH = Sensational
TED TURNER = Daddy
WILLY NELSON OR DAVID ALLEN COE = Both
WCW = *fart sound*
S.E.X. = Two types of sex
TOBACCO = Sandman taught me how to roll my own
RIC FLAIR OR HARLY RACE = Harly is the baddest man alive, cept me
NIKITA KOLOFF = Superpowers
GOLDUST = Son
ROGER CLEMONS OR NOLAN RYAN = Nolan Ryan
JEFF JARRETT = Champion of the World
NWA WORLD TITLE = Wouldn't it be amazing if a 50 year old man won the title one more time? He then says he might not be kidding.

Tenay then interviews Hermie Sadler and Jeff Hammond. NO. FUCK YOU. FUCK THEM.

Match #2: Dusty Rhodes vs. Brian Lawler [Ladder Match]
This was actually good. What the fuck? It's all about Dusty bleeding and selling and making a comeback, not the ladder. Dusty brings out a 1 foot tall stepladder, AND HE DROPS THE ELBOW OFF OF IT! AMAZING! They do stuff, and yeah. Lawler is too obsessed with embarrassing Dusty and hurt himself. Flair gets involved, but Nikita runs out and he fights off Flair now! SUPERPOWERS ARE BACK! YEAH! Dusty climbs up and gets the belt down.
**1/4

Dusty and Nikita hug, but Erik Watts runs out and grabs the stolen NWA Title and leaves with it.

Match #3: AJ Styles vs. Glenn Gilberti
Great AJ performance. Lots of really neat spots and bumps from AJ, and Disco is clearly just a guy in there with AJ. He is slow and plodding, but AJ does a great job making this watchable. Gilberti gets a roll up using the ropes to win, but the ref sees it and restarts it. AJ then wins with the Styles Clash. Glenn had his feet on the ropes, but the ref didn't see it. Why is Gilberti being protected? What the fuck?
**1/2

Gilberti then hits the ref with a chair. He walks to the SEX locker room and Mike Sanders walks in. Gilberti says D'Lo is not one of them, and he knows Sanders bleeds S.E.X., and he tells him to put on his gear to go fight D'Lo.

Match #4: David Young/Athena vs. Sonny Siaki/Desire
This sucked, as usual for this feud. Mostly the women fighting. Young gets in, and he turns on Athena with the Spinebuster. Desire pins her to win.
3/4*

Young then puts on an SEX shirt.

In the back, Saturn is interviewed, but Barton attacks him and they fight to the ring.

Match #4: Perry Saturn vs. Mike Barton
This was actually great stuff. It felt like a legitimate fight, with the physicality and how it was worked. Saturn gets busted open above the eye from Barton's great punches, and it is brutal. They have good throws, and yeah. Cool story where they sell Barton breaking his hand on a punch to Saturn, so Saturn works the hand. He puts on a Jujigatame and wrenches at the wrist and fingers, and Barton has to tap. No idea where this came from.
**3/4

In the back, Sandman and New Jack are arguing, but The New Church attacks. AND JAMES MITCHELL THROWS A FIREBALL AT SANDMAN! HOLY SHIT! The New Church then lays out New Jack.

Match #5: D'Lo Brown vs. Mike Sanders
This sure happened. On a show with Bart Gunn, 2003 Saturn, 2003 Dusty, and Brian Lawler, this is the worst actual wrestling match, not counting the mixed tag, since that was mostly an angle. SEX interfered, but it all failed and D'Lo won with the Lo Down.
*3/4

SEX then beat down on D'Lo.

Horrible pretape interview with Trinity and Tenay. Kid Kash then comes out and tells Trinity to stop trying to use him to become a star and says he's the star of this team.

RAVEN VS. JARRETT: APRIL 30TH!

Before the next match, Kash gets on the mic and tells Trinity not to move a muscle at ringside.

Match #6: Raven vs. Kid Kash
Julio, Alexis, and Trinity are at ringside. This was really an awkward mismatch of styles, and it being heel vs. heel didn't help. Also, Kash is a horrible babyface. Raven's offense all looked great though. Trinity defies orders and gets involved to stop interference. She then walked out on Kash, and Raven wins with the Evenflow.
**1/4

Match #7: Christopher Daniels/Elix Skipper vs. Jerry Lynn/Amazing Red vs. Chris Sabin/Jonny Storm vs. Jason Cross/Shark Boy [Elimination Match - Many Stipulations]

This was quite a fun spotfest. It is also Sabin's debut. It is obvious that this will come down to XXX vs. the X Division dream team of sorts, but Sabin and Storm impress in their time in this. Red shines especially, which is not shocking. The mystery luchador. now in black, comes out to shove Cross off the top rope, and Daniels then pins him. Some more stuff happens, and the masked man comes back out when the ref is distracted. He hits the Swinging DDT on Sabin behind Lynn's back, and Lynn rolls onto a cover and it is down to the two real teams. They work really well together. Red/Daniels is an awesome pairing. Skipper debuts the insane rope walk Huracanrana. Awesome finishing run and Red gets Daniels with an inside cradle to win!
***

It will now be both Red vs. Lynn and XXX vs. Red/Lynn for the tag titles in coming weeks. No word on which will be next week.

Mike Tenay gets in the ring, and he brings out Jeff Jarrett for an interview. He talks about Jeff's behavior between faking a charity event, and then cheap shots on D'Lo Brown and then attacking Alexis Laree with a chair last week, and he says this is conduct unbecoming of the NWA Champion. Tenay asks him what's wrong and Jeff says he has no idea if he can trust anyone in his life and Tenay asks if he's paranoid. Tenay is such a dick. Jeff grabs the mic from him and is mad at Tenay telling him how to be a champion, but Raven and his backup all come out through the crowd. Raven stands on the announce table and he tells him to beat up Tenay if it makes him feel like a big man. He says this is all about Raven, and they both know it. He says Jeff has gotten more and more on edge since this began and his destiny is 21 days away, and every bad dream he had as a child is three weeks from coming true. He yells at the fans for cheering him, and he says he knows Jeff lives for that title and would kill for it too. Raven says without that belt, Jeff is nothing and Jeff says he was winning titles while Raven was detoxing. Jeff challenges Raven to fight right now and security comes in to stop it. Raven gets in to fight and they both get chairs. Dusty Rhodes comes out and taps Jeff on the shoulder, but Jeff turns and instinctively hits Dusty with the chair! Jeff is in shock and Raven laughs on the apron as the show ends.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 11/20/2002 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: Triple X, Since 3/12/2003
NWA X-Division Champion: Kid Kash, Since 2/12/2003


NWA-TNA
April 16th, 2003
Nashville, TN


Up in Raven's Nest, Raven is with Alexis Laree and Julio Dinero and officially dubs them The Gathering. He says Jeff Jarrett might have convinced everyone else that he's always wanted to be NWA World Champion, but he wants that belt for the power, so he can turn this place into the southern wrasslin' territory he always wanted, and he's going to dismantle that power in two weeks, when he fulfills his destiny of becoming the NWA World Champion, and tonight, D'Lo Brown will be a victim of what is coming to be known as the Raven Effect.

Match #1: Raven w/ The Gathering vs. D'Lo Brown
Good stuff here. They work really well together and D'Lo really seemed like he had something to prove. Awesome bumping, right hands, and even an awesome dive. Again though, it seemed like they just skipped the middle portion and went from the opening stuff to the finishing run. Some great bullshit with Alexis and Julio. D'Lo is blinded by powder and takes out Julio thinking it's Raven. He tries to cover, but then Raven gets him with the Evenflow for the win.
**3/4

Hype video for Raven/Jarrett in two weeks. This is probably the best build to a match in TNA history.

In the SEX locker room, Gilberti hypes everyone up for their matches, which includes XXX vs. Red/Lynn for the tag belts and Kash/Sanders for the X Title and David Young vs. James Storm. He then walks off for his match next.

Match #2: AJ Styles vs. Glenn Gilberti [Falls Count Anywhere Street Fight]
They come dressed to fight, which always wins me over for a street fight. This is actually great stuff. There's a few off moments, but all in all, it's way more than I expected. Great AJ performance. Really heated brawling, and then he gets a gross bladejob and has awesome "out on his feet" selling. To his credit, Gilberti has good work on the cut, but this is mostly the AJ show. Mike Sanders gets involved to hurt AJ badly. D'Lo fights him off and to the back. AJ has an awesome comeback in the ring. Gilberti manages to get Styles with the Last Dance while AJ is holding a chair, so AJ is rammed throat-first into the chair! Gilberti rolls him up while he's struggling for air for the win! HORRIBLE booking to put Gilberti over, but this match was awesome.
***

In the back, Erik Watts and Dusty Rhodes have an argument over the stolen NWA Title, AND WATTS USES THE MYSTERY BURLAP SACK. Goldilocks tells Watts to stop it, and for whatever reason, he does. OH NO. IT'S STARTED ALREADY!

Before his match, Kid Kash gets on the mic. He calls Trinity out to the ring, and she comes out. He apologizes and says the title and fame has gone to his head, and for that, he apologizes. He hugs and kisses her, and she accepts the apology and stays in his corner, and he smiles.

Match #3: Kid Kash [c] w/ Trinity vs. Mike Sanders [NWA X Division Championship]
This happened. Trinity keeps interfering, and it allows Kash to hit his Flipping Van Terminator for the win. Probably the shittiest non-Shane McMahon Van Terminator I've ever seen.
*1/2

Post-match, The Harris Brothers hit the ring. Kash runs away, but Trinity is caught. Kash refuses to save, and Trinity is hit with the H Bomb.

Perry Saturn comes out for a match, and he gets on the mic. He says Mitchell claims he pissed in his yard, but tonight he's going to shit in his house, and he calls out the mystery opponent. AMAZING! James Mitchell comes out. He says Saturn associated himself with a homicidal lunatic and a filthy lush like New Jack and Sandman. And honestly, he can't think of two personality traits he admires more, and he could have done great work with them, but they rejected the offer of the New Church, and they all have to pay. He introduces him to his mystery opponent for the night, MIKE AWESOME!

Match #4: Perry Saturn vs. Mike Awesome w/ Father James Mitchell
This was 2003, so it's not as good as it would have been 3-4 years ago, but still, it was good. They do stuff for a few minutes and then Sandman and New Jack run out to brawl with Awesome for a DQ.
**

The New Church also runs out and everyone brawls. The New Church runs off the ECW guys. I have no idea who are the faces here.

In the parking lot, Jarrett is randomly throwing weapons out of the ring truck.

In a pretape, Tenay interviews AMW. Harris says they've both been taking a lot of singles matches, but they're still on the same page. Storm asks what last week was about the SEX locker room, and Harris says he was hanging out and trying to get them a title shot, and asks what's wrong with having some friends on the other side of the fence. Storm says he's not like that, and he's going to beat David Young's ass tonight.

Match #5: James Storm vs. David Young w/ Sonny Siaki & Desire
This was good. Storm makes with the random Huracanranas and dives, and it is such a weird weird contrast to the Storm we've gotten used to since 2007 or so. Storm has it won, but then Siaki gets him with a low blow, and Young wins with a nice Spinebuster.
**1/2

IN THE BACK, SANDMAN AND NEW JACK ARE PLAYING CHESS! They talk during this and Sandman apologizes for yelling at him last week and says they're extreme brothers and have been for a while. New Jack says he doesn't care about wining or losing, and he just like to hurt people. Sandman says he knows, and then declares check. He says it's time for their match, and New Jack is mad, but he walks off.

Match #6: The Sandman/New Jack vs. The New Church w/ Father James Mitchell [No DQ]
Fun garbage brawl. Blood, kendo sticks, tables, etc. Awesome runs in to Awesome Bomb New Jack over the top and through a table! Saturn runs out to fight him too, but Brian Lee drags a KO'd New Jack into the ring and covers him to win.
**1/4

THE LIGHTS GO OUT! HOLY SHIT YES! YES! Oh. Nope. It's just Justin Credible. HUGE cocktease there, seriously. Anyways, he joins the other ECW guys to fight off Awesome and the New Church.

Match #7: Christopher Daniels/Elix Skipper [c] vs. Jerry Lynn/Amazing Red [NWA World Tag Team Championship]
This was great! Lynn and Skipper seemed to reign it in and realize the best pairing is Daniels/Red, and they let that be the majority of this. Nobody tried anything stupid like body part work or did anything overly contrived, and this was just the best possible match they could have had. The mystery luchadore again ran out and shoved Red off the top. Lynn was then all alone, but he threw Skipper into Daniels and he rolled up Skipper to win the belts! That really should have been reversed, since Red is the one everyone goes nuts for and Lynn is the one who the masked man has targeted, but regardless, it didn't ruin it.
***

XXX can't believe it, and they attack the new champions. Jeff Jarrett runs out with a garbage can, and he hits Daniels and Skipper with it to save. Jarrett gets on the mic and says Raven is saying he has a date with destiny, and he's saying the courtship begins tonight in JEFF JARRETT'S CLOCKWORK ORANGE HOUSE OF FUN! He challenges Julio and Alexis to fight him, or he'll come and blowtorch Raven's ass. Julio and Alexis walk out from the crowd, with Raven nowhere to be found.

Match #8: Jeff Jarrett vs. Julio Dinero/Alexis Laree [Jeff Jarrett's Clockwork Orange House of Fun]
Apparently, pinfalls count in Jeff's version. This was a fine bullshit hardcore match. Nothing really amazing, but good work from everyone. Jarrett sets up a table and puts both Alexis and Julio on it. He goes up top, but Raven now runs out from the crowd, and he Superplexes Jarrett off the top and onto both of them and through the table! Julio rolls on top of Jeff for the win.
**1/2

Raven then picks up Jarrett and hits the Evenflow and screams "DESTINY!" in his ear on the mat. This all rules.
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