Welcome Guest [Log In] [Register]
Add Reply
Simon Watches TNA - 2006
Topic Started: May 20 2012, 11:16 PM (3,853 Views)
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006
NWA World Tag Team Champions: AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPIONS CURRENTLY
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006


TNA Impact
August 10th, 2006
Orlando, FL


Rhino comes out to cut a horrible promo about what he's going to do to Monty and Joe. Monty comes out to fight him, and Rhino says since it's Falls Count Anywhere on Sunday, they should do it in the crowd. They fight in the crowd, but SAMOA JOE IS JUST HANGING OUT WAITING, AND HE CHOKES OUT MONTY! YEAH!

A video airs on Sting's career.

Match #1: Kevin Nash/Alex Shelley/Johnny Devine vs. Chris Sabin/Jay Lethal/Sonjay Dutt
Shelley, Sabin, and Lethal all look great, and Nash is fine in the short bursts. Dutt is a decent face in peril, and this is fine enough for the 5 minutes it got. Logical finish happens with Devine getting in and killed by people who are better. Sabin wins with the Cradle Shock.
**1/2

Match #2: Homicide w/ LAX vs. Christopher Daniels

Good stuff. Not super long, but good. Brother Runt is in the crowd with a sign saying "FIGHT ME ABYSS". Konnan distracts the ref, and he hits Daniels with the Border Toss. Homicide covers to win.
**1/4

AJ runs out with a chair for the save.

A video airs on Sting's TNA career so far.

Match #3: Abyss w/ Father James Mitchell vs. Shark Boy
Brother Runt is on the stage, and now has a sign saying "WHY WAIT UNTIL SUNDAY?" This is your average squash.
*1/4

Abyss goes after Runt, but he avoids him. He runs to the ring and Abyss follows. Runt hits the Acid Drop and quickly leaves, while Raven watches in the crowd.

In the back, Eric Young brings Jim Cornette some Wendys and bourbon. AMAZING. Cornette says he can't drink on the job, because he's liable to fire 80% of the roster if he gets drunk. Cornette says if Eric wants a shot, he can fight Johnny Devine at Hard Justice, because he doesn't like him. He tells him to win, and his job is probably safe.

Match #4: Christian Cage vs. Scott Steiner
This is fine enough for the 3-4 minutes it gets, before Jarrett interferes for the DQ.
*3/4

Jarrett puts Cage into the Scorpio Deathlock, but the lights go out. Sting is in the ring, and he fights Jarrett. Christian and Sting fight off and Christian hands Sting the NWA Title to end the show.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006
NWA World Tag Team Champions: AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPIONS CURRENTLY
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006

Posted Image


TNA Hard Justice 2006
August 13th, 2006
Orlando, FL

Match #1: Eric Young vs. Johnny Devine

This happened, I guess. Eric wins with a Wheelbarrow Neckbreaker.
**

Earl Hebner comes out and attacks Slick Johnson, horribly.

They now have to evacuate everyone out because the roof caught on fire from the pyro.

They cover by showing hype videos for all the main stuff, and the four way tag match is cancelled. Monty Brown runs over to Tenay and DW outside the building, and cuts an insane promo, and sings "Hey Joe", replacing the word gun with the word cheeseburger and saying he eats rhinos for breakfast. He calls Joe a Hippophant, half-hippo and half-elephant.

They finally get people back inside.

In the back, JB asks Alex Shelley about rumors that Kevin Nash is injured. Shelley is sad and says it's true, and this is the worst moment in TNA history. He says Nash would have won this #1 Contender's Match and the X Division Title, so he can only do what he can to try and represent Paparazzi Productions in his absence. He walks off and has a black band around his arm with KEV written on it.

Match #2: Chris Sabin vs. Alex Shelley [#1 Contender's Match]
This is these two for 9 minutes, so it's great. Probably a better match than Sabin/Nash would have been, but the Nash stuff ending so soon is a real bummer regardless. Finish is kind of abrupt, unfortunately, and it holds it back. Sabin wins with the Cradle Shock.
**3/4

Hype video for Abyss/Runt.

Match #3: Abyss w/ Father James Mitchell vs. Brother Runt [Anything Goes]
This was helped by only being six minutes or so. Raven again watches, and they tease him having interest in Runt. Abyss wins with a Black Hole Slam to thumb tacks.
*3/4

Hype video for the three way.,

Match #4: Samoa Joe vs. Rhino vs. Monty Brown [Falls Count Anywhere]
This is surprisingly amazing. Joe drags Rhino, but Monty also puts on a hell of a show, to his credit. Lots of big awesome bumps, and Joe catches Monty running with the STJOE off the side of the ramp and through a table to win.
***

In the back, JB and Slick Johnson accuse Larry of being in cahoots with Jarrett and Hebner, but he rants and denies it.

A hype video actually airs for Gail/Sirelda. Yeah, really. I type that a lot with TNA hype videos, but seriously. Wow.

Match #5: Gail Kim vs. Sirelda
HORRIBLE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE. Gail wins with some manner of a Blockbuster.
1/10000000000000*

In the back, JB interviews Steiner. He says Sting is an idiot for choosing Christian Cage to be in his partner. He says Christian is so dumb he can't even understand what he says, and then drops an all time great Steinerism. "SEE, I COME FROM A HIGHLY EDUCATED UNIVERSITY, SO WHEN I TALK TO THESE WHITE TRASH, I GOTTA DUMB MYSELF DOWN." He says Christian is Canadian White Trash, which makes him the lowest form of life.

Match #6: Senshi [c] vs. Jay Lethal vs. Petey Williams [TNA X Division Championship]
No idea why Lethal got put in there after Petey pretty clearly won a #1 Contender's Match, but it makes this way better than it would have been otherwise. The Lethal/Senshi moments were great, but Petey vs. both men was horrible. Petey gets Lethal with the Canadian Destroyer, but Ki gets rid of him and hits Lethal with the Warrior's Way to win.
**1/2

Hype video for LAX/AJ & Daniels.

Match #7: AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels [c] vs. LAX w/ Konnan [NWA World Tag Team Championship]
Awesome match. Less of the amazing hate filled brawl you might expect after the angle on Impact, but a really great formula tag anyways. They tell a fine story, with LAX pretty much overwhelming the champions all match, and they have to pull out a High/Low to barely beat Homicide. They'll top this.
***

Hype video for Jarrett/Sting.

Match #8: Jeff Jarrett [c] vs. Sting [NWA World Heavyweight Championship]
Steiner and Christian are both there. Typical Jarrett Brawl. They've been doing this match in main events for the last 4 years, so not only is it beyond boring now, but it's pretty fucking infuriating now. Christian turns heel finally by breaking the guitar over Sting's head, and he pulls Jarrett on top to win.
**1/4
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006
NWA World Tag Team Champions: AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPIONS CURRENTLY
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006


TNA Impact
August 17th, 2006
Orlando, FL


The ring is set up for some kind of celebration for Jeff Jarrett, BUT FUCK THAT SHIT! LAX AND AJ/DANIELS BRAWL TO THE RING. The props all get killed, and AJ and Daniels get busted open but make a comeback, and Rhino comes out to get attention for himself because nobody gives a shit about him. Monty Brown, Brother Runt, and Samoa Joe all also get involved and it gets pulled apart. Jeff Jarrett comes out to yell at all of them for ruining his celebration, BUT THE LIGHTS GO OUT! STING GETS IN, AND HE RUNS OFF ALL THE HEELS WITH THE BAT! Jarrett gets away without getting hit, and Sting says Jeff Jarrett didn't beat him, but Christian Cage beat him! Sting says he wants a rematch at Bound For Glory, and he'll do anything. He asks if the fans want to see him get a shot. How does the crowd respond? By chanting "JOE! JOE! JOE! JOE! JOE!" There's no reason that BFG shouldn't have a double main of Joe/Jarrett and Sting/Christian. That really seems like what the TV was building to, at least with Sting/Christian.

Match #1: Chris Sabin/Jay Lethal/Sonjay Dutt vs. Alex Shelley/Johnny Devine/Petey Williams
Shelley now has to carry two worthless sacks of shit. During the match, Earl Hebner tries to attack the ref again. They do stuff for 3-4 minutes, and Sabin beats Devine with the Cradle shock.
*3/4

In a pretape, Christian Cage says he's the savior of TNA, not Sting, and Sting only saw fit to come to TNA after he got here, and he did what he did for everyone in TNA. He says people like his friend Rhino will understand that.

In the back, JB interviews a bloody AJ Styles and Christopher Daniels. AJ says they're fine, and if LAX wants a rematch, all they have to do is ask. At the Spanish announce table, Konnan gets on the mic and challenges them to make it a Border Brawl match where anything goes, and Daniels accepts.

In a pretape, Shane Douglas, James Mitchell, and Simon Diamond all say they want to manage Bobby Roode.

Match #2: Chris Harris w/ James Storm & Gail Kim vs. Chase Stevens vs. BG James vs. Kazarian [Tag Team #1 Contender's Match]
This was short and useless. Harris goes to use handcuffs, but gets distracted and argues, and Chase hits him with the handcuffs to win. AWFUL. GOD DAMNIT.
*1/4

Shane Douglas approves of Chase post-match.

Match #3: Samoa Joe vs. Ron Killings
This was awesome. They get like 9 minutes, so this is great. Killings is great as a upper midcard babyface trying to stop the unstoppable. This is the kind of shit Joe should have been doing between the Steiner match and now, not getting lost in a #1 Contender's Match. Killings looks better than he has in months, but Joe is a force of nature and can't be contained. Muscle Buster does the job.
***

In the back, JB interview Jarrett, and he says Sting can have him at Bound For Glory if he puts his career on the line!
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006
NWA World Tag Team Champions: AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPIONS CURRENTLY
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006


TNA Impact
August 24th, 2006
Orlando, FL

Match #1: Alex Shelley/Johnny Devine vs. The Naturals w/ Shane Douglas

There is only so much Shelley can do, as TNA is quickly teaching us, while also slowly stripping Shelley of everything that made him special and turning him into a mindless spotty X Division guy. They go for their Powerbomb/Missile Dropkick deal on Devine, but shelley dropkicks the legs out and Devine falls o ntop to win.
*3/4

Douglas yells at The Naturals for being horrible.

In the back, JB talks to AMW and Gail Kim. Harris says they're like brothers after teaming together for over 4 years, and brother fights sometimes. Storm says they fight every few years, and it's always okay. He hands Storm a beer and says they need to get back on track, because AMW aren't a losing team. They toast each other and walk off drinking.

In the back, Brother Runt says Abyss made a mistake by not killing him off when he had the chance.

Christian Cage comes out to the ring, and he gets on the mic. He says Sting has always talked about being a spiritual person, but when it comes to TNA, CHRISTIAN CAGE IS GOD. Rhino comes out now and says they've known each other a long time, and he's never seen him do something so low. What about when he turned on his brother, also Rhino's friend, in their hometown? What about when he tried to light the US flag on fire? Or when he stole his best friend's girl? This is hardly even in the top 5 or horrible things Christian has done. Christian says he was there for Rhino when he had surgery and when he got fired, and Sting sure wasn't. Christian says he's either with him or Sting, and he hands Rhino a chair. He turns around and says if he wants to hit him, then he can do it now. Rhino doesn't do it, and he gives Christian the chair back and goes to leave. Christian asks if it's about Sting, or if it's about him being a way bigger star than Rhino could ever be and making Rhino realize what a failure he is. Rhino says he doesn't need a chair and goes for the Gore, but Christian hits him with the chair! He hits him again, and he's busted open. Christian then kills him with the CONCHAIRTO. I don't mind this feud, if they insist on shunting Christian away from Sting and the title.

In the back, JB interviews Larry about the Earl Hebner stuff. He says he has no control over people not in TNA, and he shouldn't lose his job over this. Eric Young is walking by and asks if his job is still safe, and JB says someone might get fired, but it might not be him. Larry says he might be fired if he doesn't win next week, and Eric is paranoid again.

Match #2: Abyss w/ Father James Mitchell vs. Cassidy Riley
Short squash, like 30 seconds short.
3/4*

Mitchell gets on the mic and says Raven has been poisoning Runt's mind, and they want to give him a reminder of what's in store for him if he's stupid enough to come back for seconds. Abyss pours some thumbtacks on the mat, AND ABYSS PUNCHES THEM WHAT THE FUCK?!

In a pretape, Sting accepts Jarrett's offer for a Title vs. Career Match at BFG, and Tenay says the contract signing will be next week.

Match ##: AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels [c] vs. LAX w/ Konnan [NWA World Tag Team Championship - Border Brawl]
This is basically just a Street Fight. Daniels takes the "come as you are" part seriously to a hilarious extent, showing up in dress clothes. Only like 7 minutes, but it's bloody and violent and heated and everything you could want out of a 7 minute street fight. They had a lot of cool spots, but nothing too amazing so they could save some stuff. Konnan hits Daniels with the slapjack on the top, and Homicide hits the Ace Crusher off the top and through the table to win the belts!
***

Credit to TNA for capitalizing on a super hot act in LAX. Probably the only time they actually did that after someone caught fire (Raven 2003, Joe 2005-6, Elijah Burke 2010, Bully Ray 2011-12)
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: LAX, Since 8/24/2006
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006


TNA Impact
August 31st, 2006
Orlando, FL


LAX comes out to celebrate the title win, and Konnan dedicates the win to all the Latinos in this country, their ancestors who had to suffer racism and inequality, and to all the great Latino wrestlers and champions in the past who like them, persevered through injustice like Pedro Morales, Rey Mysterio, Tito Santana, and Eddie Guerrero! AJ and Daniels come on the tron from the back, and they applaud. Daniels says they could complain about Konnan getting involved, but they knew what they signed up for. AJ says they fought them in their Border Brawl, and now it's time for them to step into their territory, because at No Surrender, they would get their rematch in an ULTIMATE X MATCH! FUCK YEAH!

Match #1: Chris Sabin/Jay Lethal vs. Senshi/Petey Williams
This was good stuff since it got 5 minutes or so. Petey is the only one in there who is outright bad, and they did a good job covering for him. Petey accidentally hits Ki at the end, and Sabin hits the Hurricane DDT for the pin, and Low Ki just watches as it happens without trying to save. Fuck you, Petey.
**1/2

TONIGHT: Abyss vs. Runt in a MATCH OF 10,000 TACKS, a Public Execution of Sting on behalf of Jeff Jarrett (uh....)

Another pretape airs with Bobby Roode and says he's not just looking at TNA managers.

Match #2: Eric Young vs. Shark Boy
Eric Young is now billed as being from "an undisclosed location" so that nobody can mail him a pink slip. Amazing. This is a nice few minutes, and Eric wins with his cool Wheelbarrow Neckbreaker.
*3/4

A dirty Earl Hebner again jumps the railing and says he's not taking the fall for Jarrett and Larry.

In the back, JB interviews Christian. He says Sting turned his back on everyone in TNA by being unable to beat Jeff Jarrett at Hard Justice, and that's why he did what he did, because he realized Sting didn't deserve the title. He says Rhino chose Sting over him, and he did what he had to do last week. Truth comes over and says he's a liar and he's selfish, and he can't deal with the spotlight not being on him. They have a pull apart brawl.

Match #3: Abyss w/ Father James Mitchell vs. Brother Runt [Match of 10,000 Tacks]
Decent enough for two limited wrestlers. Abyss wins with a Powerbomb on some tacks.
**

Abyss takes Runt to the stage above two stacked tables with thumbtacks on them. But Raven comes out to save and shoves Abyss down through the tables.

Terrorist looking militia dudes come out for the public execution and a table is set up. Jeff Jarrett comes out and signs the contract, and I get it. The execution of the BFG contract. God damnit, TNA. He talks about everyone he's beaten, and an obvious plant throws a bottle at him and Jarrett has them ejected. MEANWHILE, THE BATPHONE AT COMMENTARY RINGS, AND IT'S JIM CORNETTE! They put him on speakerphone. He says he's going to have the trial of Jeff Jarrett next week. If he finds him innocent, then he can have vacation time until BFG to prepare, but if he's guilty, he's going to pay at No Surrender.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: LAX, Since 8/24/2006
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006


TNA Impact
September 7th, 2006
Orlando, FL


In the back, Jarrett shows up and JB asks if he's ready for the lie detector test. Jarrett flips out upon hearing there's a lie detector test. Eric Young arrives, now with jet black hair. He says a lot of guys have blond hair, so if he stands out more, he won't be fired. Eric says he can help Jarrett pass the test, and Jarrett says if he fails, he'll make sure Eric is fired.

The Ultimate X structure is up in the ring.

Match #1: LAX w/ Konnan vs. Jobbers
Usual amazing squash. Cop Killa does the deal. Almost as well as a Falcon Arrow would do the deal.
**

Konnan gets on the mic and complains about AJ and Daniels being on the PPV poster instead of the LAX, and says it's TNA being racist again. AJ and Daniels run out to drive them from the ring, and Daniels easily climbs up to the top of the steel post for the wires, and he holds up both title belts.

In the back, the X Division babyfaces are watching Jackass 2. Jerry Lynn says Sabin should be preparing for his title shot at No Surrender, but Sabin says he's not worried. This is horrible.

Match #2: America's Most Wanted/Matt Bentley/Kazarian vs. The James Gang/Shark Boy/Norman Smiley
This is about a minute, which...what the fuck? Storm hits a Superkick, and Harris gets the pin to win.
3/4*

Post-match, Tenay announces a Tag Team #1 Contender's Battle Royal for No Surrender. So we're just ignoring that The Naturals won a #1 Contender's Match? I mean, hey, fuck The Naturals, but goddamnit.

In a pretape, Shane Douglas is with The Naturals, and he says if they don't win that battle royal, then this experiment is over.

AT BOUND FOR GLORY, A STARR WILL BE BORN!

Match #3: Christian Cage vs. Ron Killings
Christian is SO much more comfortable as a heel, and it shows, as he looks better than he has since he joined TNA. Only 5 minutes, so it's not great, but Christian did look great. Unprettier ends it.
**1/2

Rhino runs out and Christian bails. Rhino challenges him to a match at No Surrender.

In the back, Jarrett leaves the room for the lie detector test. JB and Eric are waiting. Jarrett brags about Eric's trick working and says Eric has a job for life now, and says it's time to go to the ring to clear his good name.

Jim Cornette is in the ring and he makes Christian/Rhino for the PPV. He says Jarrett claims to not be involved in conspiracies, despite being the beneficiary. Jarrett and Eric Young come out and Cornette says the truth is finally out. He says the test showed that Jarrett and Larry were in cahoots with both questionable title changes over the last year, and Jarrett blames Eric and he runs away. Cornette says at No Surrender, Jarrett would be in a Fans' Revenge Lumberjack Strap Match against SAMOA JOE! YEAH!
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: LAX, Since 8/24/2006
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006


TNA Impact
September 14th, 2006
Orlando, FL

Match #1: AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels vs. Matt Bentley/Kazarian

Awesome showcase for the dream team for 5 or so minutes. They win with the Frog Splash followed by the BME.
**1/4

In the back, Jarrett and Larry yell at Eric Young for getting them in trouble and Jarrett yells at him to go find some dirt on Sting.

Match #2: Chris Sabin vs. Alex Shelley
Once again, these two have a remarkable match for what they get given. Here it's about 3-4 minutes, along with horrible bullshit ruining the end. Dutt and Lethal push Devine down the ramp in a shopping cart and into the ring to distract Shelley, and Sabin hits the Cradle Shock to win.
**1/2

Post-match, Eric Young runs out with a video camera to enlist Shelley.

Match #3: Raven vs. Abyss w/ Father James Mitchell [HANGMAN'S HORROR]
You can tell they're trying to recruit Russo by having unadvertised gimmick matches every week. This match was horrible when Raven was still able to go at a high-ish level physically in 2003-5, so in 2006, it's absolutely atrocious. Just a shameful performance. Abyss wins after Mitchell interferes.
3/4*

Brother Runt comes out to save, but then decides to give Raven the Acid Drop on the floor instead.

IN A PRETAPE, COL. ROBERT PARKER SAYS HE WANTS TO MANAGE BOBBY ROODE! WHAT THE FUCK, FORD? YOU CHOSE MANJAW OVER FUCKING TENNESSEE LEE?!

It is time for Jim Cornette's monthly in-ring session, and the locker room is around the ring. He reinstates Hebner, since the conspiracy was all Larry and Jarrett. Which, uh...nope. Scott D'Amore was involved in Canada, and then Hebner clearly did most of the work at Slammiversary. If you're going to do this big conspiracy angle that lasts for about a year, you have to get EVERYTHING right, or it all looks like shit. Samoa Joe comes out with a strap, and he says he's going to punish Jeff Jarrett for his crimes against TNA and for making TNA fans still look at him as NWA Champion. Larry comes out and says this match is unfair, so Samoa Joe whips him until he leaves. Cornette has fans with straps line the ring like they will at the PPV. Jarrett tries to come out, but all the fans start whipping him, and he bails to the back again.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: LAX, Since 8/24/2006
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006


TNA Impact
September 21st, 2006
Orlando, FL


Hey nothing on this episode looks good at all!

Jarrett beat up and bloodied Samoa Joe. God fucking damnit. You fucking cancer, just fucking leave. I hate you, Jeff Jarrett. I used to love you. You are the worst. THE WORST.

The X Division guys kept doing the horrible Jackass shtick.

Christian hit Rhino with another Conchairto.

Sherri wants to manage Roode too, I guess.

Fuck it.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Exponent
Member Avatar
The Italian Stallion
[ *  *  * ]
Unashamedly stole Claudio doing the Sabin/Jacobs Street Fight in dress clothes and nice shoes from Daniels in that match. Probably my favorite Chris Daniels thing ever. Anyway.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: LAX, Since 8/24/2006
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006


Posted Image


TNA NO SURRENDER 2006
SEPTEMBER 24TH, 2006
ORLANDO, FL


Tenay and DW promise a HUGE announcement tonight. Meanwhile, according to wikipedia, "On September 21, 2006 TNA president Dixie Carter re-signed Russo as a writer on the TNA creative team." He doesn't really get to work until after Bound For Glory though, so we have one final month of somewhat reasonable stuff before it all goes to hell.

Match #1: Eric Young vs. A1
Eric asks Tenay and Don on his way out if the announcement is that he's fired. This is a 6 minute A1 match, so it sucked. Eric wins with the Showstopper, which is the name for his Neckbreaker deal.
*1/4

They run down the card, now including Abyss vs. Raven vs. Runt.

Jay Lethal's music plays for his match vs. Petey, but he, Dutt, and Sabin are playing video games in the back. Lynn yells at him to go to the ring, and Lethal says he's not worried, and Dutt holds up a box of laxatives and says Petey had some. Lynn then also yells at Sabin to get ready for his title match or he'll lose.

Match #2: Jay Lethal vs. Petey Williams
Decent 7 minutes. "Lethal gets something resembling a decent match out of this load of shit." is what I would say if this was good. The story is Petey selling the Ex-Lax. Which is horrible, and he somehow sells laxatives even worse than he sells wrestling moves. Lethal looks decent, but this is tainted by bullshit. Lethal wins with a roll up. Don keeps teasing Petey shitting his pants in the ring.
**

Petey runs to the back to take a shit.

In the back, Rhino cuts a bad promo again.

Match #3: Abyss w/ Father James Mitchell vs. Raven vs. Brother Runt [No DQ]
This also sucked, but maybe it sucked the least of all the matches so far. Still not great. Just the least offensive. Raven still has a mind for some cool spots, if not the physical ability to make them look amazing or fill time between them anymore. Abyss wins with the Black Hole Slam on Raven.
**

In the back, Jeff Jarrett tells Eric Young to make sure Sting stays out of his match.

A video recap airs of the tag title scene.

Match #4: Tag Team Battle Royal
Rules are that when it comes down to two men, their partners get back in and it becomes a normal tag match. This has AMW, Naturals, Paparazzi Productions, James Gang, Shazarian, Killings/Hoyt, Sharkie/Smiley, and Diamonds in the Rough. There's enough talent in this to make it pretty good. Don West never having seen an actual battle royal and being used to the TNA Gauntlets makes for amazing commentary. Shelley has a lot of great close calls. Comes down to AMW vs. The Naturals once again. AMW delivers big time with their control seg, beating something decent out of The Naturals. The James Gang comes out to stop AMW from cheating, and the fucking Naturals win with a roll up. MOTHERFUCKER.
**1/2

Hype video for Senshi/Sabin.

Match #5: Senshi [c] vs. Chris Sabin [TNA X Division Championship]
This is tainted by the Jackass bullshit, but not to the degree that Lethal/Petey was. In fact, only the ending is tainted by that shit, and in TNA, that's pretty good actually. Senshi beats the fuck out of Sabin and they have a lot of great spots. For the first time in months, it feels like TNA is really letting Senshi be himself. Good shit. Lethal and Sonjay run out with a blow up doll to try and distract Ki, but Sabin picks it up and it allows Ki to hit the John Woo Dropkick to win.
***

Hype video for christian/Rhino.

Match #6: Christian Cage vs. Rhino
Not awful, but not great. Christian carries Rhino, but they are held back by this being a normal match. Rhino's concussion selling was horrible. Christian wins with the Unprettier on a chair.
**1/2

In the parking lot, Eric is talking to JB and LAX comes over. Konnan tells Eric to leave and calls him a walking glory hole. He says AJ and Daniels are about to get a war that they won't survive. BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBDAT.

Hype video for the tag match.

Match #7: LAX [c] w/ Konnan vs. AJ Styles/Christoper Daniels [NWA World Tag Team Championship - Ultimate X Match]
This is the best Ultimate X match ever, surely. All the great storytelling and spots and lack of contrived bullshit of the January 2004 one without shitty guys like Michael Shane to be there to drag it down. Great and obvious story of LAX lacking experience, so they were just trying to beat down AJ and Daniels. It was going pretty well too, but when they started trying to climb, they failed due to their hesitancy and inexperience. Lots of cool spots that made sense, and Hernandez shined as the power guy, pulling people down instead of climbing. They take him out with the Frog Splash, BME, and Spiral Tap in succession, and AJ hits Homicide with a Styles Clash off the apron through a table on the floor! Daniels tries to climb, but Konnan gets a kendo stick and tries to knock him off the corner. SO DANIELS CLIMBS UP TO THE TOP OF THE STEEL, AND JUMPS TO THE MIDDLE OF THE X! HOLY SHIT! He gets the belt down and they regain them.
***3/4

BOUND FOR GLORY: OCTOBER 22ND!

Hype video for Jeff/Joe.

Match #8: Jeff Jarrett vs. Samoa Joe [Fans Revenge Lumberjack Match]
This is good for a lumberjack match. Jarrett starts the match with like three shirts on. Amazing. Still all the flaws of a lumberjack match, too much focus on going to the floor and no real story in the ring. Joe wins with the Muscle Buster.
**1/2

SAMOA JOE LEAVES WITH THE NWA TITLE. FUCK YEAH!

Jim Cornette comes out to make the big announcement and announces that Impact goes prime time on Spike TV starting on 11/16. He says that's not the big announcement, and a video airs to promote Kurt Angle. Yep.

Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels, Since 9/24/2006
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006

TNA Impact
September 28th, 2006
Orlando, FL


Lance Hoyt is coming out for a match, but thankfully, Jeff Jarrett jumps him from behind and lays him out. He gets on the mic and complains about the lumberjack match, and demands Jim Cornette make that idiot give him his title back before the end of the night.

Match #1: Samoa Joe vs. Raven
This was decent enough for a Joe showcase. Brother Runt comes out to interfere at the end, and Joe wins with the Choke.
**

Runt tries to shake Joe's hand, but Joe drops him with the Muscle Buster. Abyss then comes out too, but Joe gets the slap flurry and knocks him to the floor with the Enzuiguri. Joe gets on the mic and says the NWA Title is finally where it belongs, and if Jeff Jarrett wants it back, he's not a hard man to find.

Clips air of the Bound For Gloyr press conference, where Rhino challenges Christian to an 8 Mile Street Fight.

Match #2: Team 3D vs. Brandon Thomaselli/Vaugn Doring
Horrible. Disappointing to see that Team 3D is back.
1/2*

Clips air from the press conference again, with Lex Luger and Buff Bagwell saying Sting is training to be in top physical in-ring shape for the match. Buff says he's focusing on training Sting for endurance, which uh, how? What the fuck does Buff Bagwell know about stamina in a wrestling ring? Lex Luger, I get. They have a long past, etc. But fuck Buff Bagwell.

In the back, Jeff Jarrett tells Eric Young to go get his belt back from Samoa Joe, but Eric refuses. Jarrett asks if he wants to be fired, and Eric says Joe's gonna kill him if he does that though.

Christian Cage comes out to do commentary, and he accepts Rhino's challenge.

Match #3: Chris Sabin/Jay Lethal/Sonjay Dutt vs. Senshi/Alex Shelley/Johnny Devine
This is fairly decent. The X Division faces seem to have cut out the awful Jackass bullshit, and Lethal and Sabin go back to being very good in the ring. Low Ki and Shelley are also there to carry Dutt and Devine. Sabin rolls up Devine to win.
**1/4

Rhino runs out after Christian and he is held back by security.

Jim Cornette comes out to end the show, and brings out Luger and Bagwell to talk about Sting's training. He also announces that Kurt Angle would be the ringside enforcer for Jarrett/Sting. Jeff Jarrett comes out and says Cornette needs to get him his title back. Cornette says it's pretty simple, if Jeff wants it back, he has to go get it. Jarrett is pissed and attacks Luger and Bagwell. He calls out Joe and he runs out. He beats up Jarrett BUT WE GOTTA GO FOLKS WERE OUTTA TIME
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels, Since 9/24/2006
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006


TNA Impact
October 5th, 2006
Orlando, FL


In the back, Cornette talks to the roster and says he's making a 5 way match tonight with the lowest 5 ranked guys on the roster, and the loser is actually fired, because they have too many people employed now. James Mitchell says Abyss can solve his NWA Title hostage situation if he were to be rewarded with a title shot of his own, and Jarrett says okay.

Shane Douglas and The Naturals come out to the commentary table, but thankfully only Shane actually does commentary.

Match #1: Team 3D vs. Matt Bentley/Kazarian
This wasn't good, but it was at least short. The James Gang came out to watch. 3D beats Bentley.
*

Bubba gets on the mic and says since they don't seem to have a match for BFG and they say two teams out here, they're issuing an open challenge for a tag match at Bound For Glory.

Father James Mitchell and Abyss come out. Mitchell says Jim Cornette and Jeff Jarrett have joined the list of people to make a deal with the devil in TNA, and he calls out Samoa Joe to hand the title over, or Abyss would go and take it. Joe comes out and they brawl. Jeff Jarrett runs out to grab the belt off the mat, but both Joe and Abyss attack him! He flees, and Joe hits Abyss with a Powerslam, and leaves with the title again.

Match #2: LAX w/ Konnan vs. Tyler Black/Jeff Watson
Tyler Black died, so this was an even better LAX squash than usual. Cop Killa ends it.
**

Post-match, Konnan gets on the mic and challenges AJ and Daniels to put up the titles against LAX in Six Sides of Steel at BFG.

Match #3: Eric Young vs. Shark Boy vs. Norman Smiley vs. Elix Skipper vs. David Young [Loser Is Fired]
This was decent enough, I guess. Larry comes out, still mad at Eric for revealing the conspiracy (despite Larry himself not being punished at all), and shoves him off the top. Sharkie then hits Eric with the Dead Sea Drop to win.
*3/4

In a vignette, Bobby Roode says he'll reveal his new manager next week.

Match #4: Jeff Jarrett/Christian Cage vs. Christopher Daniels/Ron Killings
I'm glad Jarrett and Christian now get along swimmingly. This was good stuff though. Got 7 or so minutes, and was very good. Not quite great, but whatever. LAX comes out, and Konnan hits Daniels with the slapjack, and Jarrett covers to win.
**1/2

Jarrett calls out Samoa Joe, and he comes out with the belt to fight. Christian tries to steal the belt in the meantime, as Joe gets rid of Jarrett. Rhino comes out and Gores Christian, and Joe takes the belt and leaves with it again.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels, Since 9/24/2006
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006


TNA Impact
October 12th, 2006
Orlando, FL


Samoa Joe comes out with the belt, and he got on the mic. He said the jackass who usually carries this belt gets to talk for half the show every other week, it feels like, so he has a few things he'd like to say. He says this belt used to be the most prestigious title in the world. And in the early years of TNA, it got back on the right track. But over the last two years, this belt has mostly been held by a paper champion or two who have turned it into nothing but a prop to try and make themselves seem relevant again. He says he's going to hold this until someone can take it from him, and if an honorable man like Sting should win at Bound For Glory, and he'll trade in the belt for his rightful title shot. Christian Cage comes out and says he takes offense to that remark about paper champions, since he's the rightful champion. Joe asks how many times he defended it, and he's almost as much of a paper champion as Jarrett was. Christian says Joe might be undefeated, but he's never beaten him. He says just like Joe stole the NWA Title, it was stolen from him, and Joe says possession is 9/10ths of the law. Christian challenges Joe to fight him tonight in a Ladder Match! Joe stupidly accepts.

In the back, LAX says they don't wait to wait for Bound For Glory, and tonight, they're on the hunt for some gringo meat, BUT AJ AND DANIELS ATTACK THEM! FUCK YEAH! They brawl to the ring and then into the crowd. They go by the LAX border, and Konnan helps out Homicide and Hernandez. They throw AJ away, and locks Daniels inside the border's steel fence area. They bloody him up, and AJ tries to get in, but they keep knocking him off of the cage, before referees come out from the other side to break it up.

In a vignette, Bobby Roode is walking out of someone's office. He says he's just signed his new manager, and he'll reveal them to the world at Bound For Glory. I'd call it a blatant bait and switch, but who gives a shit?

In the back, Jerry Lynn gives the X Division faces a pep talk, and Sabin thanks him and calls him old man. HAIL SABIN

Match #1: Chris Sabin/Jay Lethal/Sonjay Dutt/Shark Boy vs. Senshi/Alex Shelley/Johnny Devine/Petey Williams
Sabin/Jay vs. Senshi/Shelley would have been much better, but this is fine enough. Senshi/Sabin is announced for BFG here. Sabin wins with the Cradle Shock on Petey.
**

In a pretape, Nash says the X Division has gone in the crapper since he's been gone. He says over the last 30 years, he's basically built the X Division, so he's hosting the Kevin Nash Invitational Gauntlet at Bound For Glory!

Hype video for Sting/Jarrett.

A pretape interview with Kurt Angle airs. He talks about winning six World Titles and being told he wasn't anything special anymore, and how TNA is going to indulge him as he tries to destroy his own life and body as well as letting him do his bullshit match formula every fucking time. Or something. He talks about how he "used to" be addicted to painkillers, but now is clean and cares about his family. Also, he wants to watch his wife shit on Triple H's chest and fight everyone in the UFC.

Joe vs. Raven vs. Abyss vs. Runt in MONSTER'S BALL is announced for BFG. What a disgusting waste of Samoa Joe. Fuck you, TNA.

Match #2: Samoa Joe vs. Christian Cage [Unsanctioned Ladder Fight]
Some decent stuff, but more of an angle than anything. Only 5 minutes or so. Joe hits the Muscle Buster, but Abyss comes out to attack him. Raven and Runt come out to knock him off the apron. Raven and Abyss brawl away. Joe and Christian both get the belt down on the mat. Rhino comes out and GORES Christian, so Joe again leaves with the belt.
**1/4
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels, Since 9/24/2006
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006


TNA Impact
October 19th, 2006
Orlando, FL


Really weirdly, this episode isn't included in the big TNA 2006 torrent pack. I say "Really weirdly" because this has one of the biggest TNA angles ever at the end, which I will just post:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jnpp2VFO-VA

Other than that, this episode appears to be mostly hype videos, judging from results.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Jeff Jarrett, Since 6/19/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
NWA World Tag Team Champions: AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels, Since 9/24/2006
TNA X-Division Champion: Senshi, Since 6/22/2006


Posted Image


TNA BOUND FOR GLORY 2006
OCTOBER 22ND, 2006
PLYMOUTH, MI


On the pre-show, Roode announced Tracy Brooks as his manager. I am not opposed to doing the whole Macho Man manager search angle with Roode, but when you end it this way, the woman should be sweet and lovable and actually attractive and not someone who's been presented for the last 3 years as a slutty gold digging whore with a manly jaw and hideous face.

Kevin Nash comes out to do commentary on the Gauntlet.

Match #1: Kevin Nash Invitational X Division Gauntlet
This gets 20 minutes, so it's actually very good. Everything you'd expect and/or want from a longish X Division gauntlet with Nash's name attached to it happens. Awesome Nash commentary, a midget spot. Austin Starr, which is Austin Aries working the prototype version of the gimmick he'd later perfect in 2009, is in at #1. You get Lethal and Shelley in in the first half of the match too, and all three carry the match as they last until the end. Best part might be FUCKING D-RAY 3000 MAKING A MIRACLE RUN. Nash also breaks out an amazing Johnny Ace impression here, being the first guy to get that in on TV. Between humor and actual insight, Nash is already way better than Tenay. Tenay is the absolute worst. Gets down to Aries, Shelley, Devine, and Lethal. Aries tosses Devine out, and Shelley yells at Devine. Lethal tosses Shelley out, and then Aries wins with the Brainbuster.
**3/4

Nash gives Aries the trophy, and Shelley is jealous.

Clips air from this last Impact, where Homicide hit Gail Kim with the Gringo Killer.

In the back, AMW swears revenge on LAX. FUCK, THOSE MATCHES ARE GONNA RULE. They say belts or no belts for LAX after tonight, they've got an ass whooping coming. SORREH BOUT YOUR DAMN LUCK.

Match #2: America's Most Wanted vs. Team 3D vs. The James Gang vs. The Naturals w/ Shane Douglas
AMW does what they can. They're sort of babyfaces again, and they're great no matter what, so it works. AMW vs. Naturals is good again tonight, since they tend to deliver when it matters. This was really a tale of two matches, with it always being either AMW/Nattys or 3D/Outlaws. The veteran pairing sucked dick, but the TNA originals match up was great. Unfortunately, the focus was on Team 3D. God damnit. The 3D beats one of the Naturals.
**

Shane yells at the Naturals post-match for being terrible.

Hype video for Monster's Ball.

Match #3: Samoa Joe vs. Raven vs. Brother Runt vs. Abyss w/ Father James Mitchell [Monster's Ball - Special Referee: Jake Roberts]
What a depressing waste of Samoa Joe. They have a few neat spots, and they all seem to be trying hard on this night. Joe is so out of his element here. He beats Raven with the Muscle Buster, and Mitchell eats Jake's DDT.
**1/2

Match #4: Eric Young vs. Larry Zbyszko [Loser is Fired]

This is about 3 minutes of Larry stalling. Then he tries to use brass knucks, but Eric gets them and hits him for the win.
DON'T FIRE ERIC

Hype video for Senshi/Sabin.

Jim Cornette comes out and thanks everyone for showing up. He says Kurt Angle and Samoa Joe will have a chance to settle their differences after Bound For Glory, but he's asked them both to remain calm tonight. Kurt Angle comes out, and says he's going to call the main event right down the middle and he'll make sure nothing funny happens. He calls out Joe, AND JOE COMES OUT! THEY HAVE AN AMAZING PULLAPART! FUCK YEAH! FUCK YEAH!

Replays are shown as it cools down, and Tenay says Joe has been escorted out of the building to let cooler heads prevail.

Match #5: Senshi [c] vs. Chris Sabin [TNA X Division Championship]
This was great. They work it like they should have done this entire build and feud, with Senshi as a dominating asshole, and Sabin being all fiery and what not. I had such high hopes for Senshi as champion, but it just didn't click for whatever reason. Ki punishes him, and they have a really great finishing run, with a super hot crowd. Ki completely overwhelms Sabin at the end, but Sabin is able to turn around as Ki tries the Dragon Clutch, and he gets an inside cradle to win the belt!
***

A hype video airs for Rhino/Christian, set to a horrible Jimmy Hart style version of "Lose Yourself".

Match #6: Christian Cage vs. Rhino [8 Mile Street Fight]
Best Rhino match yet, due to spacing the spots really well and Christian taking some awesome bumps. Rhino hits the Piledriver off the apron through a table, and both men slowly get in. Rhino goes for the GORE through a table, but Christian falls down, and he goes through it! Christian gets up long enough to hit the Unprettier, but Rhino kicks out. Christian then buries him under a ladder, some chairs, the table remnants, and some signs, and goes nuts with chair shots to the debris, before pinning Rhino to win.
***

In the back, JB is with LAX. Konnan says it takes a nation of millions to hold them back, but no longer. He says they're tired of the fences and borders, and they're going to bring the violence to a new level in the cage like TNA wants. He brings up AMW and calls Gail Kim an oriental slut, and if they keep talking about the USA, they'll show them it's all about the Latino Nation. Homicide then chimes in with a BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBDAT.

Hype video for the tag match.

Match #7: AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels [c] vs. LAX w/ Konnan [NWA World Tag Team Championship - Six Sides of Steel]
Good shit. Not quite on the level of Ultimate X, but really close and their second best match. Takes a little bit to get going, but it picks up big time when Homicide busts Daniels open WITH THE GHETTO FORK! YES! Daniels sells blood loss well, and AJ has a great hot tag. AJ hits an INSANE Crossbody off the top, and yeah. Konnan throws in a coat hanger, and Homicide chokes Daniels out with it! He passes it back to Konnan through the opening while Daniels is near the cage, and he holds Daniels back. AJ is forced to fight both, and Homicide regains the belts with the Cop Killa.
***1/4

Hype video for the main event.

Match #8: Jeff Jarrett [c] vs. Sting [NWA World Heavyweight Championship - Title vs. Career - Special Enforcer: Kurt Angle]
This is the best Jarrett title match since Jarrett/AJ III in December 2003. Sting is super in shape for this in a slightly new outfit, kind of a mix of Crow Sting and Wolfpac Sting. After nearly 3 years of increasingly lame brawls, Jarrett's swan song as top heel in the company is him going back to what he's best at, and that's actually wrestling. And surprise, surprise, it's great. They work a great Ace vs. Legend type deal. Kurt Angle becoming the ref at the end almost took focus away, but they had a good enough finishing run to cover for it. Great TNA staple of all the heel bullshit failing him at the end of his reign. Although AMW and XXX did it better than Jarrett. Sting FIGHTING SPIRIT~'ing out of a guitar shot could have been ridiculous too, but his body language when he put the Deathlock on right after basically saw him selling it. Jarrett taps and Sting wins the belt.
***

Final great TNA show. AND NOW, THE FALL.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting, Since 10/22/2006
NWA World Tag Team Champions: LAX, Since 10/22/2006
TNA X-Division Champion: Chris Sabin, Since 10/22/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY


TNA Impact
October 26th, 2006
Orlando, FL


NEW Champion Sting comes out to open the show. Before he can say anything, Christian Cage comes out, and celebrates his win from last Sunday. He says he hears there's the beginning of a big #1 Contender's tournament tonight with 18 other men, but that's ridiculous, considering he's the true savior of TNA and he never lost that title. Christian says Sting fears him and dares him to name him #1 Contender right now. Sting says he'll get a title shot, but he'll get it when he decides, and if he wins the #1 Contender spot, he'll get it at Genesis, and runs Christian off with the bat.

DW and Tenay continue to hype the FIGHT FOR THE RIGHT TOURNAMENT~, without saying what it is.

In the back, JB interviews Samoa Joe, and says Kurt Angle will speak to the fans tonight. Joe says he's gotten to know Kurt a little over the last week, but he thinks they should get up close and personal tonight.

LAX comes out for a match, BUT AMW RUNS OUT AND ATTACKS THEM! FUCK YEAH! They have a pretty great pull apart, but is quickly broken up and they jump into a match and nobody mentions it again. Jesus, it's 12 minutes in and you can feel his influence.

Match #1: LAX [c] vs. The Naturals [NWA World Tag Team Championship]
Konnan and Shane Douglas are both there. This is about 2 minutes, before Hernandez beats one of them with the Border Toss.
*3/4

Douglas yells at The Naturals, but they shove him down and leave, and he smiles.

PAPARAZZI PRODUCTIONS:
-Shelley says he's fired Devine for being useless, and Nash says after a kid refuses to edit German snuff films for him, he has no place here
-Shelley asks if Nash thinks Starr is better than him now, and Nash says he's not better, just different
-Austin Starr comes in and Nash puts him over
-Nash tells Shelley to film all of his matches in full
-Shelley is not pleased
-When Aries finally fucks over Shelley in expo's TNA, I want this thing referenced. NASH HAS ALWAYS PREFERRED ARIES.

They finally explain the rules for FIGHT FOR YOUR RIGHT (TO PARTY) TOURNAMENT:

-Stage 1 is a REVERSE BATTLE ROYAL
-First 7 men to get in the ring over the top rope advance to Stage 2
-Stage 2 is a battle royal with non-retarded rules
-The order of elimination there determines seeding order for the rest of the tournament
-Oh, but the final two men then go into a normal match, with the winner going to the finals of this tournament

RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO! RUSSO!

BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE I REVIEWED 1999. ALMOST THREE YEARS. IT'S TIME WE GOT TO KNOW EACH OTHER AGAIN.

Match #2: REVERSE BATTLE ROYAL FIGHT FOR YOUR RIGHT MATCH THAT LATER TURNS INTO A REAL BATTLE ROYAL AND THEN A SINGLES MATCH
Look, this is basically the worst thing TNA's ever done. We're coming up on 10 years of TNA being a promotion, and they've done maybe the most stupid stuff of any promotion in the modern era/ever. It's mostly guys standing around on the floor, and at least half of them get caught just standing around and looking upset that this is a thing. I can only assume they're not immediately climbing into the ring out of the hope that if enough people protest this match, it will just stop. They randomly cut away to Matt Bentley in make up and lipstick with glitter, hanging out in what they claim is Raven's old perch. Raven never had a perch in the Impact Zone, so I guess they have a camera set up in the Asylum still? The 7 who get in are Robert Roode, Chris Sabin, AJ Styles, Christopher Daniels, Abyss, Lance Hoyt, and Ron Killings. Roode throws out Truth first, making Truth the 7th seed. Roode tosses Sabin out too, making him 6th, and then Daniels, who is 5th. AJ gets rid of Roode, and then Abyss tosses AJ. So Roode is 4th and AJ is 3rd. Abyss then hits Hoyt with the Black Hole Slam to win after a few horrible minutes to win. Is Hoyt still in this tournament now? They don't say. Kind of has to be, not sure how they'd do a 5 man tournament. The battle royal part wasn't awful, but I cannot in good conscience give this any kind of actual positive rating.
What I just saw is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever seen. In no point in this rambling, incoherent mess of a match did they come close to anything resembling a rational match. Everyone in the building and watching on TV is now dumber for having watched it. I award you no stars, and may God have mercy on your soul.

A pretape interview airs with JB and Jeff Jarrett. Borash asks about a rematch, and Jarrett says for once, he will not seek a rematch or another title shot, and he's going to go home for a little while instead. He says he's done everything there is to do, and maybe he went over the line over the last few years. He says Sting and everyone better be careful what they wish for, and he says he hopes Sting is up to the challenge. There was horrible melodramatic music here that really killed the piece.

Kurt Angle comes out, and he gets on the mic. He shits on WWE for trying to protect him from his own death wish, and he wants to beat everyone in TNA. He admits that Samoa Joe scares the shit out of him, but he wrestles at his best when he's scared, and he wants to face his fear right now. Samoa Joe comes out, and they have another awesome brawl. The locker room empties to pull them away from each other.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting, Since 10/22/2006
NWA World Tag Team Champions: LAX, Since 10/22/2006
TNA X-Division Champion: Chris Sabin, Since 10/22/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY


TNA Impact
November 2nd, 2006
Orlando, FL


They recap the tournament so far with a Jimmy Hart version of "You Gotta Fight For Your Right (To Party)" He gets the intro part right, but botches up the flow of the music on the verses.

Clips air from earlier tonight, where Sabin is randomly super cocky and dickish about being champion and says Jerry Lynn is old and doesn't know what he's talking about. AJ Styles comes over and says this is crap and tells him to respect what Jerry did for that belt. Sabin tells him to eat him, and they brawl. Sabin says he's not going to wait around for AJ to come after him, and he challenges AJ to a title match tonight.

TONIGHT: CHRISTIAN VS. RHINO IN A WEAPONS ON A POLE MATCH! WHATEVER THEY CAN GET, THEY GET TO BRING INTO THEIR CAGE MATCH ON 11/16! WELL, OKAY THEN!

Match #1: Chris Sabin [c] vs. AJ Styles [Fight For The Right Tournament - TNA X Division Championship]
This was good stuff, they work well together. OF course, TNA now being the worst wrestling show on TV (only took an episode, pretty goddamn impressive work there by VinRu and TNA's already crack booking team), this gets 4 minutes and ends super abruptly when AJ rolls up Sabin to win the belt.
**1/2

A pretape interview with Sting airs, where he talks about God. He says he forgives Jeff Jarrett and says he learned that Jeff is dealing with pretty heavy personal issues at home. They don't mention what it is. If you're gonna talk about it, you have go all the way, I feel. Sting says the NWA Title corrupted Jeff Jarrett, and he's going to try not to be corrupted by it himself.

Samoa Joe vs. Kurt Angle is announced for Genesis on 11/19. This gets criticized a lot, but I have no real problem with it. The problem is that they followed up by running the match into the ground over the next 18 months so when Joe won the belt off of him, nobody gave a shit about their matches anymore. Plus, at this point, it looks like Kurt's gonna be dead in a year, so they might as well get the dream matches out of him before his heart explodes while he's brushing his teeth and having nasty beastiality style sex.

Match #2: Ron Killings vs. Lance Hoyt [Fight for the Right Tournament]
This sucked. Truth isn't trying at all anymore, but it's only like 90 seconds and Truth wins with a move.
3/4*

The James Gang immediately come out, since in Russo's TNA, nothing gets to resonate at all. BG says he's tried of TNA, and they quit, and you've seen the last of The James Gang. Kip tries to say something, but his mic is cut off, and they are mad. This will only get worse.

Match #3: Christopher Daniels vs. Robert Roode w/ Ms. Brooks [Fight for the Right Tournament]
This is pretty decent, but also castrated by time constraints. They got 5 minutes though, so it's not horrible. They have some stuff going on, but it's one of those WWF 1999 midcard TV matches where it's just two talented guys doing moves to try and get the most out of their limited time. Except Val Venis vs. D'Lo Brown or whatever is probably better than this, since they've actually grown accustomed to only a few minutes. Anyways, Roode wins with the Payoff.
**1/4

Roode tries to keep on the attack, but AJ Styles runs out to save. AJ has the X Title with him, and they have words about that. I assume Daniels is mad because he thought they were focusing on tag wrestling, but Tenay and DW are completely unhelpful as to why they're arguing.

Hype video for Rhino/Christian on 11/16. Apparently it's a BARBED WIRE SIX SIDES OF STEEL.

Match #4: Christian Cage vs. Rhino [Weapons or Escape on a Pole Match]
Not sure how an escape can be on a pole. Or how anyone can claim an escape in a wrestling match at all. The implication is that if Christian wins, escape is legal in the cage match, but nobody really mentions anything. The weapons on poles are a key to the cage, bolt cutters, a chair, and a straightjacket. So I guess if you get the key or bolt cutters, you get to bring them in to get the cage door open? Rhino gets the key and straightjacket, and Christian gets the bolt cutters and chair. Nobody wins though, as Shazarian in goth drag comes out to attack Rhino when Christian is on the floor. The match just sort of ends without a bell, so uh...what? Since nobody won, what weapons are legal?
LOLTNA

A video airs of Angle and Joe's training for Genesis. Joe says he's going to strike Angle and wear him down early and take him out. Angle says he's training for endurance and thinks if he can extend Joe, he can beat him. This is the one thing on this show that made sense and didn't suck.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting, Since 10/22/2006
NWA World Tag Team Champions: LAX, Since 10/22/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA X-Division Champion: AJ Styles, Since 11/2/2006


TNA Impact
November 9th, 2006
Orlando, FL

Match #1: AJ Styles vs. Ron Killings vs. Robert Roode w/ Ms. Tracy [Fight for the Right Tournament - Semi-Finals]

This was 5 minutes of three good wrestler doing moves, so it was decent. X Division people are seen watching in the back, and I can assume they all want a shot at AJ? An obviously planted fan accidentally spills soda on Brooks, so she slaps him. Roode is distracted and misses AJ getting Truth with the Styles Clash to win.
**1/2

Roode yells at Tracy post-match, and says to get him an image consultant.

It will now be Abyss/AJ in the tournament finals tonight.

Shane Douglas comes out to the ring and says two weeks ago in the battle royal, he and Brother Ray had words. That's my bad. I assumed that #1, they were caught not giving a fuck about the match rules and just standing around like 50% of the people in it, and that #2, not even TNA would run a Shane Douglas/Team 3D feud in the year 2006. I was wrong. I apologize. Brother Ray comes out, and asks what Shane's problem is. Shane says he doesn't like people who refuse to move past their glory days and want to keep reliving hardcore all the time. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA. HOLY SHIT, THAT WAS A GOOD ONE. Since Colt Cabana spent half the year in blood feuds in 2006, that line might make Shane Douglas the funniest wrestler of 2006. My god. Anyways, The Naturals attack Bubba, and D-Von is found laid out in the back.

Tenay and DW mention that LAX/AMW for the Tag Title has been signed for Genesis, and then they introduce clips shot earlier today outside of the arena. Clips air of LAX attacking AMW at an autograph signing outside the building earlier, AND HOMICIDE BORDER TOSSES JAMES STORM INTO A WALL! FUCK YEAH! THAT RULED! This and Angle/Joe's build are the two remaining bright spots.

Match #2: Austin Starr w/ Alex Shelley & Kevin Nash vs. Petey Williams vs. Johnny Devine
This is about 2 minutes, so you know, it's useless. Especially with two horrible wrestlers in there, and the focus being on the Shelley/Aries stuff. Williams beats Devine after the Canadian Destroyer.
3/4*

LAX comes out from their territory in the crowd, and Konnan gets on the mic. He says you can kill a revolutionary, but you can't kill a revolution. He says that just like them, Petey Williams is an immigrant who has been mistreated because he's not a pure white American, and they're going to show how to deal with the white man. He says the only thing the white devil understands and respects is power, SO THEY'RE GOING TO BURN HIS FLAG TO THE GROUND, AND KONNAN PULLS OUT A FOLDED UP U.S. FLAG! Petey is okay with this, and Konnan says their flags stand for something, unlike this piece of shit that stands for lies, exploitation, and racism. This is AMAZING.

Hype video for Christian/Rhino.

They replay the Joe/Angle training video.

Both Mitchell and Daniels get ejected for the main event.

Match #3: AJ Styles vs. Abyss [Fight for the Right Finals - #1 Contender's Match]
This is a 8 minute condensed version of their usual match. Halfway through, Christian comes out and hits both men wit ha chair. He says he's the true Champion and #1 Contender, and leaves. They then restart it during the break. Mitchell comes out to help, but Daniels runs down to cut him off. The ref is distracted, and Sabin runs down too and kicks AJ in the head from the apron. Abyss hits the Black Hole Slam to win.
**1/2

Edited by Big Tuna, May 30 2012, 11:32 PM.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting, Since 10/22/2006
NWA World Tag Team Champions: LAX, Since 10/22/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA X-Division Champion: AJ Styles, Since 11/2/2006


TNA Impact - Prime Time Special
November 16th, 2006
Orlando, FL


LAX comes out to open the show, and Konnan gets on the mic. He says the United States has ignored them and the immigration issue, but they can't ignore them when they burn the flag to the ground. AMW comes out to attack them, and they have as great brawl. It turns into a 3 on 2, but Gail Kim runs out! She gets Konnan with the Huracanrana, but Hernandez tries to Powerbomb her. Harris pulls her down, and Storm hits Hernandez with the Superkick, and LAX bails.

Match #1: Samoa Joe vs. Jay Lethal
Great Joe showcase, these two work so well together. Joe wins with the Choke.
**1/4

Joe hits the Muscle Buster post-match. Dutt comes out to save, but is also choked out. Sabin comes out, looking like he's going to save, but stops and realizes it's not worth it and walks away.

In the back, LAX grabs Christy Hemme and says to follow them tonight, and she'll become famous.

PAPARAZZI PRODUCTIONS - "WRESTLER'S COURT": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9_zpTsqXUg

Horrible Team 3D promo.

Match #2: Team 3D vs. The Naturals w/ Shane Douglas [Table Match]
This was at least short. That being said, at only 3 minutes, why bother? Why not do this at the PPV? Naturals win after shane interferes, and D-Von eats a 3D through a table for the win.
*1/4

TONIGHT: ANGLE VS. ABYSS

Hype video for Abyss.

Horrible James Gang promo shooting on WWE and DX, declaring war.

Match #3: Christian Cage vs. Rhino [Barbed Wire Six Sides of Steel]
They have some cool stuff going on here. The weapons deal is hardly mentioned, and it's just a normal-ish cage match. Which is impressive for post-October 2006 TNA. Christian bleeds a ton, and Rhino Gores him against the door, but it breaks the door off, and christian falls out to win.
**3/4

A video airs on the X Division.

Match #4: AJ Styles [c] vs. Christopher Daniels vs. Chris Sabin [TNA X Division Championship]
This is solid enough and gets time, so they do a lot of cool stuff. Christian comes back down with his head bandaged up. He says he's still never lost, and is the rightful #1 Contender. AJ gets rid of him, but as that happens, Daniels rolls up Sabin to win the belt!
**3/4

AJ and Daniels argue post-match.

Outside, LAX is with Christy Hemme, and they have the flag and a blowtorch. Petey Williams comes over, and Konnan asks if he wants in on this. He shrugs, and Konnan hands him the blowtorch and says to get to work and he can have the honors. Petey grabs the flag, but he throws the torch away! LAX beats the shit out of him, and they try to light him on fire, but unfortunately, the police show up for once and LAX runs away.

Match #5: Kurt Angle vs. Abyss
Angle has some decent stuff here, in terms of strikes, but it all falls apart psychologically. Abyss bumps way too much for Kurt, who looks like a cancer patient by this point. It becomes clear that earlier in the year, Taker was reigning Kurt in, instead of Kurt carrying him, as instead of working a logical big/little deal, Kurt easily tosses him around. That being said and to my complete surprise, it only takes the Ankle Lock once, with no Angle Slam before it or even used in the match at all, to make Abyss tap. Hey, that actually puts Angle's finisher over in a new environment. That's smart! Even if this was godawful.
*3/4

Joe runs out to attack Angle and they have a long exchange in the ring, which is not as smart, given that the PPV is being sold almost 100% based on them locking up in a dream match. Joe busts Angle open with headbutts in revenge, and Sting comes out to fight Abyss to the back. Joe puts Angle in the Choke to end the show.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Big Tuna
Member Avatar
The Master and Ruler Of The World

NWA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting, Since 10/22/2006
NWA World Tag Team Champions: LAX, Since 10/22/2006 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA X-Division Champion: AJ Styles, Since 11/2/2006


Posted Image


TNA Genesis 2006
November 19th, 2006
Orlando, FL


Before the most likely horrible opening match, BG and Kip renamed themselved the VOODOO KIN MAFIA.

Match #1: Voodoo Kin Mafia vs. Matt Bentley/Kazarian/Johnny Devine
This is truly awful, but it as at least only 3 minutes. I will give Russo his due here, he usually at least makes truly awful things not take up much time in the ring. Kip uses the Pedigree, and it is the worst Pedigree I've ever seen. Kip then hits Devine with the One and Only for the win.
*

He tells Vince and DX in SHOOT NAMES~ and says to watch Impact this week, which might count as a crime against humanity.

Raven comes out in a creepy mask, and he whips Devine with a kendo stick as the other two hold him in place.

Match #2: The Naturals w/ Shane Douglas vs. Jay Lethal/Sonjay Dutt w/ Jerry Lynn
Decent Naturals showcase for some 8 minutes. Dutt was trying real hard again, as it seems he does for a few months whenever there's a regime change or a new start in TNA, since he was randomly good in late 04/early 05 when Dusty took over, and then again in late 2005 when all the big new talent came in and the Spike deal got made. Lethal is great as always. Dutt gets beat after the Powerbomb/Missile Dropkick combo, which really needs a name.
**1/2

In the back, JB interviews LAX. Konnan says Petey is a coward like a true Canadian, always protecting America when they spit on him. He holds up the US flag and says if anyone tries to stop them, remember that they're US citizens too and that would be infringing on their constitutional rights, and they will burn the flag tonight. JB says he's heard Cornette is going to say something about this, and Konnan says Cornette has no power over the revolution.

Match #3: Christopher Daniels [c] vs. Chris Sabin [TNA X Division Championship]
They get 13 minutes, so this is good. Sabin is coming into his own as a great heel, refusing to do dives and things people want to see. He tries to use a chair, but AJ Styles comes out and takes it from him. Very good finishing run, and Sabin hurts Daniels' knee, but gets too confident and Daniels gets a roll up to win.
***

Sabin goes to use the chair, but Jerry Lynn comes out to take it from him. He yells at him to be a man and shake Daniels' hand. He shakes Daniels' hand, but then hits him with the Cradle Shock for the win.

A short vignette airs from Paparazzi Productions. Nash says one of them has to win tonight and he needs at least 90% from them out there, and says to win one for Bo Derek.

Match #4: Alex Shelley/Austin Starr w/ Kevin Nash vs. Ron Killings/Lance Hoyt
Hoyt is carried almost. Nash is amazing on commentary again, and says his arm is in a sling because of his old injury that he got in the Tet Offensive. Shelley and Aries work the knee of Hoyt, and Nash says he taught this game plan to the Andersons. Truth has an awesome hot tag, and gets Shelley with an inside cradle to win.
**3/4

Starr walks out on Shelley post-match.

Hype video for AJ/Christian.

Match #5: AJ Styles vs. Christian Cage
Given that this is a pretty big dream match for TNA, this could have been built to so much better. Or, you know, at all, apart from a brief angle on the last Impact. They still get a ton of time at 16 minutes, so this delivers. AJ takes a huge bump to the floor to go into Christian's control seg, which is very solid. Awesome finishing run, and they do a good job not giving away too much. Christian tries to use a chair, but Daniels runs out to grab it. They play tug of war, and AJ tries to roll up Christian, but the tug of war allows him to sit down on the roll up for the win.
***

AJ and Daniels argue post-match, and AJ shoves him. Referees come out to calm them down, and Rhino does too. He tells them to shake hands like men and he normally doesn't get involved, but he hated fighting his former best friend, and he doesn't want it to happen to them. Daniels offers his hand, but AJ says he doesn't need Rhino's help or Daniels' help, and walks out on them.

Hype video for LAX/AMW.

Match #6: LAX [c] w/ Konnan vs. America's Most Wanted w/ Gail Kim [NWA World Tag Team Championship]
This is almost great, but with only 9 minutes or so, this is kind of rushed. No idea why this only got 9 minutes. It's rushed in the way that LAX never really gets a long control seg, so it lacks both flow and a hot crowd, since they never got a chance to really get behind AMW in the match. Decent finishing run. Seems like they could really produce a great match with 10-15 minutes. They hit Hernandez with the Death Sentence, but Homicide hits Harris with the blow torch can and covers to win.
**3/4

They go for the Cop Killa on Gail, but fucking Petey Williams runs out to save! He has a pipe, so they leave. Cornette comes out and says they may not be able to send them to jail for burning the flag, since they're hiding behind the Constitution, but as a private company, TNA can punish them, AND HE STRIPS THEM OF THE BELTS. BULLSHIT. He says they have until Impact to hand the belts over, and AMW and Petey celebrate with the flag.

Hype video for Sting/Abyss.

Match #7: Sting [c] vs. Abyss w/ Father James Mitchell [NWA World Heavyweight Championship]
For whatever reason, Sting feels obligated to work a Jarrett Brawl. Abyss sets up two tables by the stage and easily finds barbed wire boards, which are just laying around in the back for whatever reason, and puts them there too. They repeatedly tease the ref DQ'ing them for stuff, and then they use tacks and a chair and Sting's bat during the time when the ref is down. He gets back up and they brawl back to the stage. Sting throws Abyss off and through the tables and barbed wire, and the ref DQ's Sting, and due to the bullshit TNA rule, ABYSS WINS THE BELT ON A DQ!
**1/2

Hype video for Angle/Joe.

Match #8: Samoa Joe vs. Kurt Angle
This is only 13 minutes or so, and since it's their first match, all their stuff is brand new, so this is by far their best match. Joe actually stuck with the strategy laid out in the video about his training, trying immediately to kill Kurt. No real overdone finishing run, as they did their shit and didn't let it get to a point of ridiculousness. Joe taps to the Ankle Lock. :( I don't know if I hate that because Joe lost or because Joe lost and then the followup was so horrible that he never fully recovered.
***

Joe offers a handshake post-match, but Angle refuses and leaves.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous)
ZetaBoards - Free Forum Hosting
Create your own social network with a free forum.
Learn More · Sign-up for Free
Go to Next Page
« Previous Topic · Simon Reviews... · Next Topic »
Add Reply