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Simon Watches TNA - 2008
Topic Started: Aug 8 2012, 09:10 PM (3,969 Views)
Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Samoa Joe, Since 4/13/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA World Tag Team Champions: LAX, Since 5/11/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008

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TNA Hard Justice 2008
August 10th, 2008
Trenton, NJ


Some rapper who is not Ice-T performs to open the show.

In the parking lot, Sting arrives and does not answer questions.

Match #1: Petey Williams [c] w/ Rhaka Khan vs. Consequences Creed ["TNA X Division Championship"]
Hey, this sucks! Creed is better than Kaz though, so it's better than the last few matches for this fictional title. This title is less legitimate than the ROH World Unified Intergender Openweight Tag Team Championships. It goes on for a while before Sheik Abdul Bashir comes out to hit Creed with a chair and Petey covers to win.
*1/2

Bashir yells in Jawa at Creed post-match.

In the back, Samoa Joe says he knows Sting is here now and he knows what he has to do. He says showtime is over, and it's his time. He says he doesn't know why he's doing what he's doing, but now his issue is with him. Kevin Nash comes over and tells him to focus solely on Booker, and he'll take care of Sting.

Match #2: Gail Kim/Taylor Wilde/ODB vs. Awesome Kong/The Beautiful People w/ Raesha Saed
This is decent enough, due to Kong being Kong. Not enough Kong, so it's not great though. Taylor rolls up Love to win.
**

Hype video for LAX/Alcohol Currency.

Team 3D is up in the rafters looking for Sting and they say they've got his back.

Match #2: LAX [c] vs. Beer Money [TNA World Tag Team Championship]
All the managers are there. This is the great match that they are capable of. Homicide apparently got his with the beer bottle on Impact, and is selling his eye. Lots of awesome chaos early on, and then Homicide is isolated. Great control segment again. AWESOME hot tag from Hernandez, and then some dives and nearfalls. Jackie gets a low blow on Hernandez, so Salinas attacks her. The ref is distracted and Homicide goes to hit Storm with the Cop Killa, BUT ROODE BREAKS THE BEER BOTTLE ON HOMICIDE'S FACE AGAIN! STORM COVERS AND THEY WIN THE BELTS! YEAH!
***1/4

In the back, Nash talks to Sting. Nash says he gets it, but there's a better way to go about it, like he's done with Joe. Sting says he sees no other way, and he walks off.

Hype video for Lethal/Dutt.

Match #4: Sonjay Dutt vs. Jay Lethal w/ SoCal Val [Black Tie Brawl and Chain Match]
Lethal's family and friends are in the crowd, including AJ. In terms of matches where Jay Lethal's mom gets camera time, this is no Lethal/Ki. Dutt doesn't even spit on Lethal's mom's face, so he's a shitty heel. This is just a generic brawl. Not bad, not great. Val again gets mad with Lethal for beating on Dutt too viciously, so she walks out on the match. Lethal wins with the Flying Elbow.
**1/4

In the back, JB talks to Booker about Sting. Booker has started calling him Jeremiah. He says he understands Sting perfectly, because they are alike, and he knows Sting has issues that Sting has to take care of personally, and those issues are with Samoa Joe. He says he does not respect Joe and neither does Sting.

Hype video for the tag match.

Match #5: Christian Cage/Rhino vs. Team 3D [New Jersey Street Fight]
Good, not great. Christian is only one man, despite the gimmick allowing Rhino and the Dudleys to be better than usual. They waste like 40% of the match with an aimless crowd brawl, but the spots at ringside and in the ring were good. Rhino Goes Bubba through a table in the corner to win.
**1/2

Devine helps 3D attack, but it is a set up for another Abyss run in. This is the best use of Abyss since 2005.

Hype video for AJ/Angle.

Match #6: AJ Styles vs. Kurt Angle [Texas Death Match]
They say it's LMS, but it's a Texas Death Match in the rules. This is better than it had any right to be, but AJ is consistently amazing in TNA LMS matches, so much so that he can reign in Kurt and get 25 great minutes out of fucking 2008 Kurt Angle. The gimmick also holds Kurt back from killing off his moves, since they can do multiple three counts. That being said, they did a great job perfectly riding the line between having enough pinfalls to get the gimmick over and having too many to the point where some were clearly bullshit. AJ does a better Ankle Lock than Kurt has done in years, maybe ever. They do stuff, and AJ wins with a Super DDT. This is the best Angle match since the Eddie Guerrero series.
***

Kurt is tended to by EMTS, but AJ comes out and hits Angle with another suplex, and yells shit at him. He goes to leave, but Sting comes out and hits AJ with the Scorpion Deathdrop on the stage! What a fucking asshole. Nash comes out and asks what the hell that was, and Sting walks past him.

Hype video for Joe/Booker.

Match #7: Samoa Joe [c] vs. Booker T [TNA World Heavyweight Championship - Six Sides of Steel]
This is a match. Booker's back to not caring at all, and 2008 Joe can only do so much. The weapons help them do better than last month, and they have some cool spots with chairs. Booker gets a low blow and several chair shots. He hits the Book End through two chairs, but Joe kicks out. Booker signals for the end as Joe gets up, BUT THE LIGHTS GO OUT! THEY COME BACK ON, AND SAMOA JOE HAS A GUITAR NOW! FUCK YEAH! JOE KILLS BOOKER WITH IT TO WIN! HA HA! OH MAN!
**1/2

MY GOD MIKE! DOES THIS MEAN THAT HE'S BACK?!
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Samoa Joe, Since 4/13/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008


TNA Impact
August 14th, 2008
Orlando, FL


In the parking lot, Samoa Joe and Kevin Nash arrive. Lauren asks about the guitar and where he got it from. Joe says if Booker T wants to play games, he can play games too, and says everybody wants in on the action now. Lauren asks who everyone is, and Joe ignores her. He asks Nash about what Sting said, and Nash said he doesn't speak for Sting, and that's how he feels, not him.

Match #1: Christian Cage/Rhino vs. The Rock n' Rave Infection w/ Christy Hemme
Good squash for the babyfaces. Rhino beats Hoyt with the Gore.
*1/2

In the back, JB interview Angle and asks about his neck. He says the match with AJ wasn't about wrestling, it was about violence, and AJ tried to break his neck twice. Kurt says he thanks God that Sting showed up, or he might not be here tonight. He challenges AJ to a gold medal challenge for his gold medals tonight.

In the back, Lauren interviews AJ. He says he promised Kurt would not get up at Hard Justice, and he delivered on that promise. He says he looked up to Sting, but Sting is no better than Kurt Angle, attacking him from behind, and he guarantees that he'll bring him the gold tonight.

Match #2: Matt Morgan vs. Johnny Devine
Horrible squash as usual.
45/*

In the back, The Beautiful People introduce their new friend, Kip James!

In the back, Lauren interviews Jay Lethal. He says this has to end, and Val has to choose between he and Dutt.

Sheik Abdul Bashir comes out and cuts a horrible promo about raping Lady America. Who is Lady America?

Match #3: Sheik Abdul Bashit vs. Jay Lethal
This sucks, too much Daivari offense. Sheik pulls out a spike and stabs Jay with it and rolls him up to win.
1/2*

Post-match, Dutt comes out and slams Lethal and hits a 450 Splash.

In the back, JB interviews Booker T. He says his head still hurts after being hit with that silver and black guitar. He realizes something suddenly, as if it took 4 fucking days to register, and asks Sharmell if he's right that that hick has some kind of business interest in TNA, and she says yes. Booker says he will handle this.

Footage airs from after Hard Justice, with Nash talking to Sting. Sting says he hasn't lost his mind, and he sees things clearer than ever. He says he's tried to do things by being nice, but he's running out of patience, and he's running out of time. Sting says Nash is too, and he should think about it.

Match #4: Samoa Joe/Kevin Nash vs. Team 3D
Good for who's involved, probably because it was only 5 or so minutes. Joe beats D-Von with the Muscle Buster.
*3/4

Joe gets a chair and beats the fuck out of Team 3D for being inconsistent this year instead of purely horrible like they had been for so long. Nash grabs the chair from him and tells him to calm down. Fucking Earl Hebner tries to get tough, SO JOE FUCKING HEADBUTTS HEBNER! OH MY GOD YES! FINALLY! Earl is an asshole and reverses the decision.

Match #5: Taylor Wilde vs. Christy Hemme
Obvious showcase for the champion. Solid enough. Taylor wins with a victory roll.
3/4*

Awesome Kong comes out to kill, and she does. Saed puts a chair down on the mat, and Gail comes to save, and dropkicks the chair into Kong, and knocks her out of the ring .

ROUGH CUT WITH CONSEQUENCES CREED. Oh my god, stop picking the worst guys for these.

Match #6: Hernandez vs. Robert Roode
Salinas, Jackie, and Storm are at ringside. This is sort of the best match of the night as a result of it being two good wrestlers getting time to wrestle. They do stuff, and Hernandez wins with a Liger Bomb. I fear that the Border Toss is gone, which is terrible.
**1/4

Jim Cornette comes to commentary, to remind people that he still works here, unfortunately. He books Roode/Hernandez again next week, and a Kong/Gail Street Fight! That should rule actually. Good for him. He says No Surrender will be main evented by Joe in a four way and there will be qualifying matches. Next week's will be Booker vs. Rhino. WOW, NO THANKS.

Match #7: Kurt Angle vs. AJ Styles [Amateur Rules Challenge - Gold Medals on the Line]
This is bullshit, as all of these matches are. AJ is ahead in points because Kurt is the maycabe worst guy on the mat who should logically dominate everyone. There is a ref bump when AJ is ahead, and Kurt then starts punching and shit. The match kind of stops being a thing now.
Biggie's WCW 1995

THE LIGHTS GO OUT AGAIN! THE BAT COMES DOWN, AND ANGLE GETS IT! He measures AJ to swing, BUT THE LIGHTS GO OUT AGAIN! BREE WOO! BREE WOO! BREE WOO WOO! YES! THEY COME BACK ON, AND AJ DESTROYS A GUITAR ON ANGLE'S HEAD! Since he was winning by points, he takes the medals and leaves with them. TNA Originals vs. Old Dudes Raping TNA of Money has a ton of promise, as does Nash in the middle, since he is an old guy in it for money, but him admitting so makes him sort of a babyface, plus the whole Paparazzi deal makes him sort of a permanent beloved figure.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Samoa Joe, Since 4/13/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008


TNA Impact
August 21st, 2008
Orlando, FL


In the back, JB interviews Angle. He says he's come here tonight to get his gold medals back and to get that son of a bitch who stuck his nose in his business. He says this isn't two years ago, and this is Planet Angle now.

Match #1: Hernandez vs. Robert Roode
Hector, Salinas, Jackie, and Storm are there. Don says Homicide is not medically cleared to come to work yet. Same idea as last week, good, but not great due to only getting 5 or so minutes. Plus, it's the two lesser members of the team, so there's somewhat of a ceiling for them. Hernandez wins with a Doctor Bomb.
**1/4

In the back, JB interviews AJ. He says he'll let Kurt get these things back, but he'll have to do it his way, in a Ladder Match tonight. Angle comes on, and they have a pull apart.

Match #2: Motor City Machine Guns vs. BG James/Eric Young
The Guns continue to do alright, and this was a good carryjob of sorts. Eric wins with a roll up.
**

The Guns refuse to shake hands and spit at them, so I guess they are heels again.

There is another horrible Lethal/Dutt brawl, and Lethal accidentally elbows Val.

CONSEQUENCES CREED VIGNETTE.

A pretape airs with Mike Tenay and Kevin Nash. He says he was instrumental to getting Samoa Joe into TNA, since he saw his tapes and recommended him. Hahahahahahahahahahahahhaahaha, okay. Do they actually expect anyone to believe Nash is scouting for talent in the indies? He says Joe's weakness is his temper, and he tells him all the time. Nash says young guys today get the pecking order, but they don't want to follow the rules and wait their turn. And this is coming from one of the guys behind the NWO, and then Sting, who was pretty much a young punk in his own right taking on the Horsemen and shit. Anyways, Nash again says Sting can speak for himself.

In the back, The Beautiful People attack Taylor Wilde.

Match #3: Booker T w/ Sharmell vs. Rhino [#1 Contender's Match]
Hey, this blew. Christian comes out to take Sharmell to the back, but Booker still wins clean with the Scissors Kick.
*1/4

Match #4: Petey Williams [c] w/ Rhaka Khan vs. Consequences Creed ["TNA X Division Championship"]

This was terrible again, but now short enough that I don't have to give either man any points, so I appreciate that. Sheik Abdul Bashir comes out to attack Creed for the DQ.
1/2*

Petey is mad at Bashit for interfering.

Some horrible segment with Rock n' Rave and the Prince Justice Brotherhood.

Match #5: Awesome Kong w/ Raesha Saed vs. Gail Kim [Street Fight]
This is Gail's last match, but at least it was another awesome Awesome Kong match. Only 4 minutes though, so it's nothing compared to their original series. Some cool stuff and Kong wins with the Implant Buster.
**

Kong keeps o nthe attack. ODB and Roxxi save. Rinse, wash, repeat.

Match #6: AJ Styles vs. Kurt Angle [Gold Medals Ladder Match]
This was decent, but pretty much a house show level ladder match. Booker T and Sharmell come out, and after he interferes, Samoa Joe comes out to attack him. Booker grabs the Sting bat from under the ring, and he knocks Joe out with it. AJ and Angle climb the ladder, and the lights go out. BREE WOO BREE WOO BREE WOO WOO! They come back on, and AJ hits Angle with the guitar, and gets the medals down to win.
**1/4

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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Samoa Joe, Since 4/13/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008


TNA Impact
August 28th, 2008
Orlando, FL

Match #1: Awesome Kong w/ Raesha Saed vs. Sojourner Bolt

Kong kills. Implant Buster ends it.
*1/2

In the back, JB interviews AJ and says he's fighting Christian in one of the #1 Contenders matches next week. AJ says he'll focus on that next week. He says his gold medals are in good hands, but tonight he wants to talk to Sting and get a receipt for what happened at Hard Justice.

Match #2: Lethal Consequences vs. Petey Williams/Sheik Abdul Bashir w/ Rhaka Khan
Too short and with two much awful talent to be a good match. Creed rolls up Petey to win.
3/4*

Petey and Sheik fight post-match.

In a pretape, Karen Angle interviews Abyss. He says he has been rehabbed from violence, and then tries to hit on Karen by giving him a lock of his hair.

In the back, Lauren is with ODB, and she says this place isn't big enough for both her and Kong.

Match #3: Curry Man vs. Jimmy Rave w/ Lance Rock & Christy Hemme
This was also short, but less awful than the last match. Curry Man wins with the Spice Rack.
*1/4

Lance attacks post-match, and then Shark Boy and Super Eric save.

In the back, JB is with Cornette, and he books the Prince Justice Brotherhood vs. Rock n' Rave at the PPV. He then introduces Traci Brooks and says she's in charge of booking the Knockouts division now and says to keep them out of his hair.

In the back, Booker T invites Team 3D to sit tonight and watch Sting's speech in his personal dressing room, and says he thinks they will all appreciate what he has to say.

In the back, JB is with Nash. He says Cornette owed him a favor for being the enforcer at King of the Mountain, so that's why he has one of the #1 Contender's Matches tonight. He says he's tried to talk to Joe, but Joe is too focused on Sting.

Samoa Joe comes out to do commentary.

Match #4: Kurt Angle vs. Kevin Nash [#1 Contender's Match]
This happened. They have a match for a while, and then for no reason, Nash goes out and slaps Joe and yells at him to watch what he's doing. Joe is obviously mad and has to be held back. This distracts Nash, and Angle hits a low blow and the Angle Slam to win. Well shit, you've said he has anger problems for months now, what'd you think would happen?
*3/4

In a pretape, SoCal Val says the only way to settle this grudge is to hang her engagement ring over the ring for a ladder match at No Surrender, and the winner would get her hand. Or you make decisions like a fucking grown up.

Match #5: The Beautiful People w/ Kip James vs. Taylor Wilde/Roxxi Laveaux
Decent, but too short. Kip throws Velvet a can, and she sprays it in Roxxi's face. Love then hits the Bicycle Kick to win.
3/4*

They attack Taylor and go to put a bag on her head, and for some reason, Rhino runs out to save.

Sting comes out to end the show. He says since he's been in TNA, he's done everything he can to try and help the new generation, because he knows his days are numbered and so are the days of the guys in his generation, and they need to protect the future, etc. He says he's worked with guys like AJ and Joe and Abyss, but they still have no respect. He says Booker T is a legend in wrestling, and he thought Joe was the guy to carry the torch, but when he tried to calm him down so that he didn't end Booker T's career, Joe disrespected him and the business. He says when he was Joe's age and working with Ric Flair, Flair wanted him to be the guy, and he wants that for Joe. Wait, what? When did Flair want him to be the guy? Was that when he took out his knee to delay the title shot, or when he was the Black Scorpion? Or a ton of other times he fucked over Sting. Sting says he's listened to AJ Styles, and says AJ owes him for paving the way, and says his generation is filled with entitled spoiled brats. AJ Styles comes out, and Sting says he wanted to help him, but he went too far at Hard Justice. Sting gives AJ the bat and turns around and says to do what he has to do if he wants a receipt. AJ drops the bat, and Sting shoves him and yells at him to be a man and hit him. He turns around again, but AJ doesn't do it, so Sting kicks him and hits the Scorpion Deathdrop. What a fucking dick.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Samoa Joe, Since 4/13/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008


TNA Impact
September 4th, 2008
Orlando, FL


Kurt Angle, Booker, and Sharmell open the show and Angle says Sting was right last week, and that Samoa Joe is a disgrace to the TNA World title. Booker said he is a spoiled brat like the rest of his generation. He says they are two distinguished world champions, and Christian Cage comes out. He says while they're distracted, he'll win his match tonight and then become a three time World Champion. Booker says he should stand with them on this one. Christian asks if it's about respect or if it's just about them losing their spots. Angle asks if he wants to do this the easy way or the hard way, so he asks what the hard way is. They attack, but he fights them. AJ Styles runs out to save, and Cornette says if either Booker or Angle gets involved in the last #1 Cont. match, they'll lose their title shots at No Surrender.

In the back, JB is with Samoa Joe. He says Nash always lectures him about his temper, but he lost his own temper last week and it cost him. Joe says he hears Sting will go out tonight and deliver another sermon, but he's here to wrestle, not take money out of fans' pockets by making them listen to him talk for 20 minutes.

CONSEQUENCES CREED. DON'T GIVE A FUCK.

Match #1: Sheik Abdul Bashir vs. Consequences Creed
No.

In the back, JB talks to Nash. He says he was trying to motivate Joe last week (to do what?), but now he doesn't think Joe will listen to him. He says maybe Sting will be able to talk to Joe.

In the back, TBP announce that they will have a beauty pageant next week.

Match #2: Beer Money w/ Jackie Moore vs. Super Eric/Shark Boy
Good showcase for the champions. Curry Man gets beaten up in the back by RNRI, distracting the idiots, and they beat Shark Boy with the DWI.
*3/4

Hernandez runs out to attack them, but they bail out. Homicide runs down with an eye patch and rolls them in, LAX beats on them a little, but they bail out again and run to the back.

Abyss comes out and has an open challenge and Team 3D and Johnny Devine attack. Nobody gives a fuck. Matt Morgan comes out to save. GOD DAMNIT.

Match #3: ODB vs. Raesha Saed
This happened. ODB wins.
*

ODB tries to unmask her, but Kong comes out to kill. Roxxi tries to stop her, but also dies.

CROSS THE LINE.

In the back, JB talks to AJ. He says he was an idiot for giving Sting a chance last week, and Sting cheap shotted him again. He says the way he sees it, there wouldn't be a TNA for Angle and Booker T and Sting to come to if not for AJ Styles, so they should be thanking HIM. FUCK YEAH. LOGIC. He says the only veteran here he actually respects is Christian, but he's still going to go and beat him.

Match #4: AJ Styles vs. Christian Cage [#1 Contender's Match]
This could have been great, but it was disappointingly short at only some 6 minutes. That faggot Frank Trigg interferes with a kendo stick again and Cage hits the Unprettier to win.
**1/4

Sting comes out to end the show, and says he was surprised that what he did last week got cheers, and he's glad the fans agree with him that this new generation has no respect. No, it's the fucking Impact Zone. They cheer everyone. He says there's always people who want the other way, people who wanted Joe to kill Booker T or wanted AJ to injure Angle or hit him with the bat. He says if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything, and asks Joe what it is. Samoa Joe comes out and says in a minute, he'll be standing on Sting's throat. Sting hands Joe the bat and turns around and dares him. Joe says this bat is like Sting's respect, because he doesn't need it. He throws it down, and Kevin Nash comes out. He says not to attack him from behind and to do this like a man, AND STING HITS JOE IN THE BACK WITH THE BAT. WHAT A PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT. Nash leaves, AND BREE WOO BREE WOO BREE WOO WOO! Sting calls for the music to be cut, and he calls out Jeff Jarrett to talk next week.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Samoa Joe, Since 4/13/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008


TNA Impact
September 11th, 2008
Orlando, FL


Samoa Joe and Kevin Nash are in the ring to open the show, so I guess they made up. Joe says he's not leaving here tonight without Sting's head. Nash gets his own mic and says he's invested the last 9 months into helping out Samoa Joe and the last 5 to helping advise him as the World Champion. Joe tells Nash to stop trying to protect Sting, and Nash says while he's looking in the rafters, he's got three former World Champions to worry about at No Surrender. Nash challenges Joe to beat three guys tonight to prove that he's ready, and Joe says fine, and after No Surrender, he wants Sting.

In the back, Lauren is with TBP and Cute Kip. Angelina calls out Taylor Wilde to compete against her in the pageant tonight.

Match #1: Christian Cage vs. Abyss
This was useless, but at least it was only 2 minutes before Angle and Booker T came out. They attacked Christian for the DQ.
3/4*

They bring in a chair, but Abyss takes it, and he runs them off. They attack him in a 2 on 1, but fucking Matt Morgan comes out to save, and he challenges them to a tag match tonight.

The first of three contests in the pageant is an Evening Gown Contest. The Prince Justice Brotherhood are judging. Angelina clearly wins, but because Taylor is a babyface, they went with her.

There is a pretape with Sting and Karen Angle. Sting says he was ready to retire this coming Bound for Glory, but when he watched how AJ and Joe treated the legends, he knew he couldn't leave the business like this. He says he would never treat Flair or Hogan like that, with the sneak attacks and that much violence. Yeah, it'd suck if he sneak attacked Hogan. Like if he came down from the rafters on a zip line or out from under the ring, or attacked him with a bat. If this is intentional, then it is really amazing work, as I actually hate Sting now. He says the kids need to learn tough love, and he doesn't know where Jeff Jarrett stands, but he's thinking he feels the same way, given the history with he and AJ and Joe.

AJ Styles calls out Frank Trigg. They agree to a bullshit MMA match at No Surrender and have a terrible brawl.

In the back, Lauren is with Christian Cage. He says he might not be the biggest or strongest or fastest of the four guys at No Surrender, but he is the smartest, and when the show is in his backyard, that's all he's going to need.

The bikini contest is next. Wilde tries to do a USA bikini since it's 9/11, but she's fucking Canadian, so whatever. Angelina clearly wins, and now the judges also have to agree with that because tits.

Match #2: Awesome Kong w/ Raesha Saed vs. Roxxi Laveaux
Fun brawl. Kong does Kong stuff. Nobody in the division matches up as well with Kong as Gail did, despite Gail not really being a good wrestler. Just one of those weird pairings where they click perfectly. Anyways, Kong kills Roxxi with an Awesome Bomb after 6 or so great minutes to win.
**1/4

They keep on the beating, and hey, ODB saves. OH MY GOD, THIS HAS BEEN HAPPENING FOR 10 MONTHS NOW. I LOVE KONG TOO, BUT EITHER CHANGE IT UP OR LET HER FIGHT MEN.

Match #3: Samoa Joe vs. Johnny Devine/Lance Rock/Tomko [Gauntlet]
Joe easily disposes of Devine and Rock, but then the Tomko match is fantastic. Tomko is starting to fall off two after 18 months of being great, so we'll never get a longish match that these two could have had. Anyways, Joe beats him with the Muscle Buster.
**

Kevin Nash comes out, and he gets on the mic. He says he can admit when he's wrong, and he was wrong. He says Samoa Joe is ready for No Surrender, and says he has nothing left to teach him. Nash shakes his hand and says he's on his own now, and leaves. The eventual Nash turn has been obvious since this whole thing happened, but they grew into such a good pairing, mostly through Nash's work, that it's unfortunate it had to happen. So I guess TNA deserves credit for that.

The talent contest is up. Love sings horribly. Taylor plays the drums pretty well. She wins, and is crowned, but TBP and Kip attack her until Rhino runs out to save.

Match #4: Kurt Angle/Booker T vs. Abyss/Matt Morgan
This is really really horrible. It gets like 15 minutes, and there is not a pairing in this that is good. Slow, dull, sloppy, full of botches and miscommunications, and the two stars were clearly running through the motions. Team 3D interferes allowing Angle to beat Abyss with the Angle Slam.
1/6*

Sting comes out to end the show, and he says he knows Jeff Jarrett is in the building, and calls him out. Nobody comes out and Sting says he has no problem with Jeff Jarrett and says as far as he's concerned, their issue has been over for years, but wants to know where Jeff stands. Samoa Joe is up in the rafters though, and he has a mic. He says Sting calls him disrespectful, but asks if he's just insecure like Kurt and Booker, and says maybe when Sting was taking his vacation for the last 5 months, he saw TNA do record business with him as champion and realized that they didn't need him anymore. He says Sting calls him a punk, but the truth is, Sting feels threatened. Joe challenges Sting to come to No Surrender, and says this time he has back up. BREE WOO BREE WOO BREE WOO WOO! JEFF JARRETT FINALLY RETURNS, AND HOLDS THE GUITAR UP ON THE STAGE!
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Samoa Joe, Since 4/13/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008


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TNA No Surrender 2008
September 14th, 2008
Oshawa, Ontario, Canadia


Booker T cannot make it due to hurricanes grounding flights out of Houston, so it is now a Joe/Christian/Angle three way.

Sting comes out and gets on the mic. He kills a ton of time, but eventually gets to the point and says he will challenge the TNA Champion to a title match at Bound For Glory. Bullshit, he hasn't even had a match since May. He then invokes Bret Hart's name for a cheap pop and says he's not about money, he's about respect. IF YOU'RE QUOTING ONE OF THE BEST LINES IN WRESTLING HISTORY, THEN QUOTE IT RIGHT OR NOT AT ALL. FUCK YOU STING.

Match #1: The Prince Justice Brotherhood vs. The Rock n' Rave Infection/Christy Hemme
Decent enough comedy opener. Curry Man keeps trying to fuck Christy, and eventually rolls her up to win.
*3/4

Hype video for Kong/ODB.

Match #2: Awesome Kong w/ Raesha Saed vs. ODB [Falls Count Anywhere]
This was fun. They did spots, but nothing super inventive or awesome. Kong hits the POOOOOOOOUUNCE. PERIOD. through a table to win.
**1/4

In the back, Lauren talks to Christian. He says he was never supposed to sniff the main event, let alone being a 2 time World Champion. He says the first time he won the title, he thought it could never get any better, and now he knows that's not true, because winning a third World Title one hour from where he grew up is as good as it gets.

Match #3: Team 3D vs. Abyss/Matt Morgan
Hey, awful! All the problems you expect. Abyss beats D-Von with a Black Hole Slam.
45/Poop

Post-match, Ray hits Morgan with a chair and throws it to Abyss. Morgan sees him with it and they have words, etc.

A hype video airs for the X Title match, Yes, really.

Match #4: Petey Williams [c] vs. Consequences Creed vs. Sheik Abdul Bashir ["TNA X Division Championship"]
This sucked a huge dick, but was less bad than the tag. Petey vs. Daivari is the worst pairing to ever take place in an X Title match. Petey hits the Canadian Destroyer on Creed, and Sheik Abdul Bashit. Holy shit, there is a worse X Champion than Petey Williams. Goddamn TNA, way to overcome the challenge when I said nothing could top this last awful Petey reign.
*

In the back, Samoa Joe arrives.

Hype video for Wilde/Love.

Match #5: Taylor Wilde [c] vs. Angelina Love [TNA Knockouts Championship]
Rhino, Cute Kip, and Velvet are at ringside. Decent six minutes. Kip ends up eating a GORE GORE GORE GORE and Taylor wins with a Northern Lights Suplex.
*3/4

Hype video for Lethal/Dutt.

Match #6: Jay Lethal vs. Sonjay Dutt [Ladder of Love Match]
Dutt is the worst. Absolutely the worst. This is alright though. This is somehow the second longest match of the show. They do lame ladder bumps, and then Val low blows Lethal and Dutt wins. The highlight is Don saying Val looks like she wouldn't mind being shared by both of them.
**

They then make out because Val is a whore.

In the back, Kurt Angle says words.

Match #7: Beer Money [c] vs. LAX [TNA World Tag Team Championship]
Managers are there. Horribly, this is only 9 minutes, compared to the 13 that the ladder match got. This is still great, because it can't be bad with these teams though. Strange layout, as it's just 9 minutes of action with no control segments or anything. It's good though, since they have enough cool spots and interference props to get 9 minutes with, and it was all real crisp. Homicide has Roode up for the Cop Killa, but Jackie throws powder in his face and Roode hits the Payoff to win.
***

Hype video for AJ/Trigg. They try to do a math pun by saying Trigg has come here to dish out (pun), but then they try to say Trigganomics. WHICH IS NOT A FUCKING THING. TRIGGANOMETRY.

Match #8: AJ Styles vs. Frank Trigg [MMA FAG MATCH]
This sucks. Total waste of AJ. The crowd shits on it big time. The match ends when AJ gets bored of this, and gets a kendo stick and beats the fuck out of Trigg with it. There is no bell, so I will assume AJ wins.
LOLTNA

AJ yells that he's a wrestler and that was bullshit.

In the back, JB interviews Joe. He says when Sting came in, he respected him. And when he fought Jeff Jarrett, he respected him. But then in the last year, his respect has vanished. He says they've been bringing TNA all over the world to make something more of this place, and asks where Sting was when they went to England or went to Texas or the midwest. He says Sting was at home, getting paid at least five times what the people ON THOSE SHOWS were getting paid for their hard work. He says Sting gets paid more than anyone and works the least, and he'll respect him when he earns it. He says respect is a two way street, and maybe Sting can start by showing him the respect he deserves as TNA Champion.

Hype video for the main event.

Match #9: Samoa Joe [c] vs. Christian Cage vs. Kurt Angle [TNA World Championship]
Too much Kurt for this to be great, but it was good. The Joe/Cage stuff was pretty clearly the best stuff. Shit breaks down at the end and a ref bump happens. Kurt hits Joe with a chair, but then Jarrett comes out and breaks the guitar on Angle's head. Joe hits the Muscle Buster to win.
**1/2
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Samoa Joe, Since 4/13/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008


TNA Impact
September 18th, 2008
Orlando, FL


Samoa Joe comes out to open the show, and he says he talked about people who bust their ass for TNA, and Christian Cage and Kurt Angle did that on Sunday, but they were still unable to take this title off of his arm. He says while they were busting their asses, Sting just watched, and asks why Sting gets a title shot when he hasn't had a singles match in this company in six months. Joe says Bound For Glory won't be about respect, it'll be about him kicking Sting's ass all around the ring and choking him out.

In the parking lot, Jeff Jarrett arrives.

Kurt Angle comes out and grabs the mic. He says he has a message from Jeff Jarrett, but first, he wants his gold medal back from AJ. Security makes him leave so as not to disrupt a match, which may be a first for TNA.

Match #1: AJ Styles/Christian Cage vs. Motor City Machine Guns
HEY, THIS RULED. The AJ vs. MCMG exchanges really make you miss the X Division for the first time since the title was abandoned in April 2008. Only 5 minutes, but every minute was full of something really cool. AJ beats Sabin with the Styles Clash.
**3/4

MCMG refuse to shake hands and give AJ and Christian the finger.

In the back, JB is with Booker T. He says that's what he was talking about, those two punks disrespected a legend like Christian Cage. He says he is going to beat respect into Jay Lethal tonight so that he stops disrespecting Randy Savage. HE says he will listen intently to what Jeff Jarrett has to say. He has a briefcase with him, and JB asks what's in it. Booker ignores him and leaves.

In the back, Sheik kidnaps a camera man and says he is taking this title hostage. He dares someone to take it from him, but then asks how you beat someone with nothing to lose. I don't even mind the character, it's just that it all leads to Daivari matches, so it's hard to give a shit.

Match #2: The Prince Justice Brotherhood vs. Petey Williams/Jimmy Rave/Johnny Devine w/ Rhaka Khan & Christy Hemme
Short and terrible. Faces win.
1/2*

Lance Rock comes out to attack Petey along with Rave and Devine. They shove referee Shane Sewell, and he fights back.

A horrible video airs saying Matt Morgan's cum is going to space.

Morgan and Abyss make up, as Abyss gives Morgan a lock of his hair as an apology. Awful. Team 3D comes to fight them. DON'T CARE.

Jackie Moore comes out and gets in Hector's face at the Spanish table, AND BEER MONEY ATTACKS FROM BEHIND! Why would they want this feud to continue after barely surviving the last match? Anyways, it leads to another amazing pull-apart, and probably another match in this feud, so I'm all for it.

In the back, Cornette books LAX/Hector vs. Beer Money/Jackie at BFG. That match doesn't happen, but it sounds great.

Sting comes out, and he gets on the mic. He says he heard what Samoa Joe had to say, but the truth is that he doesn't know what's going on, and he's naive and immature. He says while Joe was sucking his thumb, he was running the roads 340 days a year in small gyms for $40-50 a night, and Joe is spoiled. Yeah, US indies pay sooooooooooooooo well. Sting asks Joe what he'll do in 10-15 years when the kids disrespect him, and says he learned from men like Ric Flair, Magnum TA, Dusty Rhodes, Nikita Koloff, and Tully Blanchard to have respect. You can't cite Ric fucking Flair and Tully goddamned Blanchard, the two best heels of the territory, as teaching you respect. I'm sure Dusty felt respected when they broke his ankle in a cage or his arm in a parking lot. Dusty and Nikita, fine, I guess. Magnum was kind of a disrespectful shit too. He says Joe is younger, faster, and stronger, but he has a few tricks and it will be SHOWTIME.

In the back, JB is with AJ and Cage. AJ says Booker is trying to stir the pot here, and says they're on the same page and on the same side. Christian asks which side that is, and AJ says it's their side. Christian says he's the only one who makes decisions for Christian Cage, and tells AJ not to forget who put him in the spotlight. Yes, I'm sure AJ will be loyal to Jeff Jarrett.


In the back, Lauren interviews Jay Lethal. He says he doesn't need anybody's pity, and says he was betrayed by Sonjay Dutt and that no name tramp who doesn't deserve to have her name uttered, and he'll kill them if he sees them. He says he's not disrespecting Randy Savage, he's showing him the respect he deserves. He says Booker doesn't deserve that kind of respect, so he'll disrespect him all over the arena tonight. Look at that, it's a fiery babyface promo from Jay Lethal without the Black Machismo bullshit.

Match #3: Booker T vs. Jay Lethal
Jay tries real hard and gets something resembling effort out of Booker T. Booker wins with the Scissors Kick after a good run of Lethal offense.
**

In the back, Lauren talks to TBP and Kip. They don't let her talk and Velvet says the Beautiful People don't lose. Angelina is freaking out over a blemish, and Lauren calls it a pimple. Love says only skanks get pimples, and she needs to call her dermatologist.

Match #4: Rhino/Taylor Wilde vs. Cute Kip/Velvet Sky w/ Angelina Love
Thankfully, this is short. Taylor rolls up Velvet to win.
3/4*

Kip hits Rhino with the Fameasser, and TBP double team Taylor. Kong comes out to help kill and Rhino and Taylor get the paper bags on their head.

Jeff Jarrett comes out with the guitar to a huge pop. He gets on the mic and says enough time has passed now that he thinks he can finally admit that he's the founder of this company, along with his dad. He says in 2001, he had a vision and in 2002, TNA got off the ground. He says it was founded for young talent to have a place to wrestle, and he thanks his wife and business partners for TNA getting as far as it has. He says he can no longer sit back and watch, and calls Sting out to the ring. Sting comes out and Jarrett says they've both been in the game a long time, and says his dad gave Sting his first break in the business, the same break he founded TNA to give to others. He says there's some truth to what Sting says, but overall, he's full of crap! YEAH! He says this dream became a phenomenon because of guys like AJ Styles and Samoa Joe, who have literally carried TNA on their backs. He says they might not have gotten along, but they showed him the respect that he showed them back. He says this isn't about disrespect, it's about guys like Sting, Booker, and Angle realizing that it's time to pass the torch, and says they've both been in one place that went down because they didn't want to pass the torch when it was time. He says this is give and take, but Sting, Booker, and Angle only want to take from TNA. He says this isn't WCW, it's TNA, and he won't stand for it. Kurt Angle then comes out and asks why Sting gets to talk to him face to face and not him. Jarrett says he's got something to say to him too. He says two years ago, when he had to step back to deal with family problems, Kurt was supposed to be there to take his place as a leader, and it was the worst decision he's ever made. He says Angle's lost his wife, his kids, his TNA Title, and even his gold medals, and the only thing Angle has left to lose is what little dignity he has left. Angle says Jeff left two years ago because he was over the hill, and Sting kicked Jarrett's ass at Bound for Glory 2 years ago. He says he's carried TNA for the last 2 years, not AJ or Joe or anyone else, and he made this place important. He demands Jarrett fights him at Bound for Glory, and Jarrett says he's not a wrestler anymore, and he has nothing to prove. Angle says in that case, he should get out of HIS ring. Jarrett says not to push him, BECAUSE THIS IS STILL HIS DAMN MOUNTAIN! Jarrett says there is someone else on his side, and points to the tron, AND IT'S MICK FOLEY IN A PRETAPE. He says hi to Kurt, and says it's DAM REAL LOL. Awesome segment until the end, which felt tacked on instead of the brawl that should have happened.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Samoa Joe, Since 4/13/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008


TNA Impact
September 25th, 2008
Orlando, FL


Jeff Jarrett is in the ring, and he announces that Mick Foley will debut in the Impact Zone next week, and calls him one of the biggest acquisitions yet. Kurt Angle comes out and says he's the biggest acquisition in TNA history, because he took this outhouse and turned it into a penthouse while Jarrett was gone. Jarrett says he may have gone over the line last week, and he says he went through the trouble of getting something back for Kurt, and he hands him his gold medals back, and he says AJ was willing to listen to reason, when someone actually showed him respect. Kurt thanks him sarcastically and says to get out of HIS ring now. Jarrett goes to leave and Angle says he doesn't want washed up bitches and failures in his ring, and Jarrett stops. Kurt tells Jeff to go home and tells his daughters that he's a quitter, and Jarrett turns around and says he has NEVER quit at anything, and if Kurt wants him, he's got him at Bound For Glory! FUCK YEAH!

Match #1: Abyss/Matt Morgan vs. The Rock n' Rave Infection w/ Christy Hemme
Hey, this is bad. At least it's a squash. Hoyt is beat with Black Hole Slam.
1/500*

Team 3D comes out and Bubba says No Surrender was a fluke. He challenges them to a Monster's Ball Match at BFG. Abyss shakes his head, since he has sworn off weapons, and Morgan accepts for him .

In the back, Lauren is with Beer Money and Jackie. She says they have LAX tonight in a six man, and the losing team's manager will be forced to stop managing them. What the fuck? Then how does the BFG match work? You're going back on it, aren't you TNA? Why do you hate tag wrestling? Jackie says she's been here a long damn time and shew completes this team, so she ain't going nowhere. HECTOR GUERRERO, SORREH ABOUT YOUR DAMN LUCK.

Match #2: Awesome Kong vs. Mercedes Steele
SQUASH KILL.
*1/4

Saed comes out and hits Kong with a chair, but it's Roxxi! The real Saed is tied up in the back, and Roxxxi drives Kong out with chair shits.

In a pretape, Karen Angle interviews Christian. He says he's somewhere in between veterans and the young guys, but he agrees a little with what the veterans have to say, but he doubts it's only about respect. He says he's still able to go every night, so his spot isn't in danger. He says respect is earned by both veterans and the young guys, and he hasn't picked a side yet.

In the back, JB interviews Booker and Sharmell. Booker shits on AJ and says he is a King, and AJ is a nobody from some nothing hick down. He says he did more in his first six minutes in TNA than AJ Styles did in six years, and he again refuses to reveal the contents of the briefcase.

Match #3: Beer Money/Jackie Moore vs. LAX/Hector Guerrero [Losing Team's Manager Quits]
Storm now has his amazing beer helmet. This is really good, and the managers do their parts well. It's only 5 minute, unfortunately, which holds it back big time. Finishing run is good, and Roode hits Hernandez with the beer helmet for the win.
**1/2

In the back, Lauren is with Dutt and Val. They reveal that Dutt's dad is rich, and Val is a gold digger.

Sting comes out, and he gets on the mic. He says last week, he listened to everything Jeff Jarrett had to say, but now it was time to listen to what he has to say. He says Jeff Jarrett might have the 20 somethings in the back fooled, but not him. He says Jeff was the one who called him to wrestle for TNA and OH MY GOD, IF YOU'RE GOING TO BRING UP THEIR FEUD, THEN YOU CAN'T ALSO BREAK MAYCABE ABOUT IT THE NEXT FUCKING WEEK. JESUS CHRIST. FUCK YOU, CORNETTE. He says he chose TNA over WWE, and it wasn't just about the money. He shows a picture of Arn and Tully and says they taught him how to have eyes in the back of his head, and says nobody swerves the Stinger. Nobody except everybody in WCW from 1988 - 2001. But okay, sure. Let's pretend. He says Dusty taught him how to involve the people, and says Hogan transcended wrestling to make it mainstream. He shows a picture of Flair and says Flair put him on the map 20 years ago, and how to be a World Champion. He says Joe doesn't know how to be a champion, and then shows a picture of himself and says that's the man who will get the job done. That fucking sucked.

In the back, Abyss freaks out at Morgan and yells "NO WEAPONS"

In the back, JB interviews Joe. He says this Sting thing has him thinking, and he apologizes to Kevin Nash. He says he understands now what he meant, and he's sorry for being so difficult when he was trying to help him. Joe says as for Sting, this is beyond respect now, and he'll do his talking in the ring at BFG. Lethal and Creed come up and thank Joe for helping them out, and Lethal says he's helped him in wrestling since he was a kid. FUCK YEAH INTERPROMOTIONAL CONTINUITY! Lethal says if he ever needs help, he can count on them.

Match #4: Samoa Joe vs. Sheik Abdul Bashir
Joe squashes him, which is really really fucking fantastic. Muscle Buster ends it.
*1/2

Joe gets on the mic and says he's got Sting's respect right here. He then puts Daivari in The Choke until the ref reverses it, but Joe does not seem to care this time.

In the back, JB talks to AJ. He says he's damn proud of where he's from and he's proud of the fact that he was on TNA's very first show, and there's only maybe 2 other guys here that can say that. He says he's earned everyone's respect, and Booker's just demanded it, but that ain't how it works here.

Match #5: AJ Styles vs. Booker T w/ Sharmell
Christian Cage comes out to watch. AJ gets what he can out of Booker in a 7 minute match. Great offense, bumps huge, etc. Booker goes to bring the briefcase in, but Christian gets in to stop him. Booker plays dead, and AJ sees Christian with the briefcase. Booker shoves AJ into the briefcase and Christian and then rolls him up to win.
**1/4

Booker and Sharmell leave. AJ argues with Christian, and shoves him to end the show.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Samoa Joe, Since 4/13/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008

TNA Impact
October 2nd, 2008
Orlando, FL

Match #1: ODB vs. Angelina Love w/ Velvet Sky & Cute Kip

Short, but not entirely bad. Kip trips up ODB and Love hits the Bicycle Kick to win.
*1/4

In the back, JB interviews Jarrett, and he says he's going to address comments Angle made to a UK newspaper tonight.

In the back, Tracy book Kong vs. Wilde vs. Roxxi for the KO belt at BFG.

Jeff Jarrett comes out and says his whole career, except for a few years in the 90s, his back has been up against the wall, and he knows because he's seen hundreds of guys and places go to the grave because they tried to fight the tide from up North. He says despite that, TNA has never been stronger. He says Angle was over in the UK to promote TNA, but he aired dirty laundry instead, saying he doesn't like the direction of the company, and how he wants to go back up north after his contract expires, because he and Vince have always had a father-son relationship. Jarrett says he remembers interviews Kurt did two years ago, saying he was glad to be free from that hell, and how he would knock Vince out if he saw him again. Jarrett says he just broke that father-son bond, and at Bound for Glory, he would beat him so bad that even papa Vince won't take him back. Interesting promo. The idea should suck, because TNA is best off just ignoring what WWE does, and this reeks of a bullshit Cornette shoot, but Jarrett phrased it in a way that didn't blow apart maycabe, and it worked as a result.

Tenay and DW say Monster's Ball will now also include Beer Money and a 4th team and will be for the belts. Ugh. Fuck you, TNA.

Match #2: LAX vs. Motor City Machine Guns [Monsters' Ball Qualifying Match]
This was pretty fun. Only 5 minutes, but a lot of cool spots. Not as good as their previous match in that regard, as there's a little too much of guys getting shown waiting around for spots, which as cool as the spots are, is terrible. Hernandez hits Sabin with a Liger Bomb to win.
**1/2

MCMG again refuses to shake hands, and they give LAX the fingers.

ROUGH CUT WITH ROXXI.

In the back, Cornette talks to Angle. He fines him $25,000 for the things he said, and Angle storms off to find Jarrett.

Match #3: Sheik Abdul Bashir [c] vs. Eric Young vs. Jimmy Rave w/ Lance Rock & Christy Hemme ["TNA X Division Championship"]
This sucked, as expected. Bashir and referee Sewell had issues again, but they did not fight. Sheik beats Eric with the WMD, which is his terrible Basement DDT. At least it was only 4 minutes, I guess. Still no excuse for giving the belt to Daivari, even if it's not a real or recognized title.
1/2*

In the back, JB is with Christian, AJ, and Jay Lethal. Lethal thanks them for giving him the opportunity to team with them tonight. He says he knows he took Booker T to the limit, and he knows he can beat him. AJ asks Christian if they were cool, and Christian says he's the champ, so he's always cool.

Match #4: AJ Styles/Christian Cage/Jay Lethal vs. Booker T/Team 3D w/ Sharmell
Booker again has the briefcase with him. This could have been good, but was only 5 minutes. The babyface team shined as you may expect. AJ accidentally hits Christian with the Superman Punch, and Booker rolls up Christian to win.
**

In the back, Angle barges into Jeff Jarrett's office. Not sure when he got an office. Why do they need Cornette then? Anyways, he's not there and Angle says he's going to shove this money up his ass.

In a face to face style segment, Mike Tenay interviews Sting and Samoa Joe. Sting says he came ot TNA because he saw the potential in guys like AJ Styles and Samoa Joe. They really need to not be afraid to drop names like Daniels, AMW, Roode, Shelley, Sabin here, to really get over the idea. He says he got to know them all, and realized they had no respect. Joe says he and AJ and guys like them are the future, and actually screw that. They've been the future for years, it's time they get recognized as the PRESENT, and that the guys who they've passed by in the last year, like Kurt Angle and Booker T, and at BFG, Sting's name goes there too, they get recognized as the past. Sting says he wouldn't be here if not for the fans, which is him totally changing the subject since he's wrong. Joe says if Sting cares so much about the fans, then why's he been on vacation and not actually wrestled in six months. Joe says he's the one who's been there busting his ass so that Sting can come back every fall for a big BFG paycheck. Sting says he won't sit here and be disrespected, and he leaves. FUCK YEAH JOE.

Beer Money comes out, and they issue an open challenge for BFG. Team 3D, Abyss/Morgan, and LAX all come out, and they fight. They get pulled apart, and Cornette comes out and makes a four team Monster's Ball match for the belts at BFG. Um. WELL SHIT, CORNETTE. WATCH THE FUCKING SHOW. THAT'S ALREADY BEEN ANNOUNCED.

Mick Foley comes out to make his debut, and he gets on the mic. He says it is an absolute honor to be in the same ring that legends like Cute Kip have stood in. He thanks the fans for the pop and thanks Jeff Jarrett for having the confidence to call him TNA's greatest acquisition. Kurt Angle comes out and says first of all, that's a lie, and second of all, that this fine is unfair. He says Jarrett told him that he lost his title, his wife, his children, and his medals, BUT HE'S NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO LOST HIS WIFE. HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLY SHIT. Foley shoves him and says that's uncalled for, and even more uncalled for than him trying to claim responsibility for TNA's success when it's been carried on the backs of Samoa Joe and AJ Styles since he got here. Foley then fellates Angle on the mic and says he will be the enforcer at BFG.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Samoa Joe, Since 4/13/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008

TNA Impact
October 9th, 2008
Orlando, FL


Christian Cage comes out to open the show, and he says for weeks, people have been telling him to pick a side, and that he has to pick a side. He says he's the champ, he's Captain Charisma, he's Christian Cage, and he doesn't need to pick any side but his own. Booker T comes out and says they are from the same school, the old school. He says AJ Styles wants to put them both out of work, and AJ comes out. He says Booker is a washed up has been who won't get out of the spotlight, and Booker says not to talk to Christian like that. Cornette comes out and books AJ vs. Booker tonight with Christian as the ref.

In the back, JB interviews Sting. He says it's not only about the title or money at BFG, but he's putting his reputation on the line, and losing is not an option.

Match #1: Rhino vs. Cute Kip w/ TBP [No DQ]
This is pretty horrible, but at least it is only 4 minutes. I write that way too often. Kip sprays hairspray in Rhino's eyes and Spears him through a table to win.
3/4*

ODB and Rhaka Khan run out to attack TBP.

In the back, JB is with Angle, and he says he will sit back and let Jeff Jarrett make the first move.

Match #1: Jay Lethal vs. Consequences Creed vs. Petey Williams vs. Sonjay Dutt w/ SoCal Val [#1 Contender's Match]
This gets enough time and has enough decent spots to get points. Lethal and Creed work solid together, almost in spite of Creed not being that good. Creed beats Petey with the CreedDT.
*3/4

In a pretape, Karen talks to Foley. He blabbers a lot, but says he came to TNA to make a difference.

MONGO WILL BE THE SPECIAL REFEREE FOR MONSTER'S BALL.

Posted Image

Team 3D comes out to do commentary.

Match #2: Abyss/Matt Morgan vs. Beer Money w/ Jackie Moore
Roode and Storm really tried hard. They did. But this was not good at all. Morgan beats Roode with the Hellevator. Terrible result.
*1/2

In the back, JB interviews LAX. Homicide they was going to take the MB match to the streets of Chicago. Which would be impressive, since BFG is in a mall in the suburbs.

Mick Foley comes out in a sports jacket. He says Bubba ruined the plaid vest, so he's trying something new. He says he's had a lot of great moments, and says this match will be one of them. He promises to stop anyone from interfering, and he asked both Angle and Jarrett to come out. They come out and he asks if they have any last words. Jarrett says TNA made a huge mistake in hiring him, but they couldn't have known that at the time. Well, no, that's not true. He was saying insane things every day for like a month before he got hired. But okay, whatever. He says Angle wanted this, and he'll get it. Angle says at least Jeff got his medals back. They have a handshake. Angle tells Jeff to go apologize to his daughters, because he's not coming home after BFG.

Match #3: Awesome Kong/Raesha Saed vs. Taylor Wilde/Roxxi Laveaux
This was mostly Kong doing shit. She kills Roxxi with the Awesome Bomb to win.
**

Match #4: AJ Styles vs. Booker T [Special Referee: Christian Cage]

Same as usual for these two. AJ takes huge bumps and his offense is amazing and he has all the fire in the world, but he can only do so much when it's only 5 or so minutes and it's Booker T, who clearly has given up even occasionally giving a fuck off of PPV. They do a double pin off a cradle, and Christian says AJ won.
**

Cornette books a three way for BFG.

Coming back, Cornette is still in the ring. He calls out both Joe and Sting, and they come out. He announces that whatever happens, there will be NO REMATCH. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. He gets them both to sign the contract and yeah. They sign it, and Sting says may the best man win. Joe says Kevin Nash taught him how to be more of a professional, and professionally speaking, Sting is wrong about him, because he does respect him. Just said a few weeks ago that you don't.
But okay. Joe offers a handshake, and Sting shakes it, AND JOE HEADBUTTS HIM. YEAH FUCK YOU, STING. They have the SHOW. ENDING. BRAWL.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Samoa Joe, Since 4/13/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008


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TNA BOUND FOR GLORY 2008
OCTOBER 12TH, 2008
HOFFMAN ESTATES, IL


The whole marketing aspect of this show is based around it being in Chicago, with the mob style poster and ad theme. The show took place from the Sears Centre, which is a decent looking venue in the suburbs. At the time, it was in a developing mall. The only other building that was actually up and running was across the small parking lot, and it was a sports store that was open 24 hours. I didn't go to this show, having elected to go to the CHIKARA show a few weeks before instead, but I went to said mall about a month before this with some friends, and the store was like 80% guns. Really risky move for TNA to run a smark heavy city with the result of this main event across from a 24 hour gun store.

MAtch #1: STEEL ASYLUM MATCH~
This has all the X Division in it, and is just a renamed TERRORDOME. Huge waste of the Guns, but they were basically the only bright spot. They do lots of moves, and Lethal and Dutt race up. Lethal has a great flurry of punches and shit, and he gets out to win.
**

In the back, JB is with Cornette who says this will be the biggest show of all time. LOL. Mick Foley comes in and Cornette gets him to watch his office while he does stuff. Foley sits in the chair and TBP come in. They complain about not getting blue M&Ms like the demanded and they throw some at Mick, who tries to eat them. HE introduces himself and they scoff and say he's wearing polyester, and that's gross. They leave and JB asks if that's true. Mick says he likes to be in polyester and JB says he'd rather be in Velvet. HIGH FIVE! Mick then points out Borash's terrible high five.

Match #2: Rhino/ODB/Rhaka Khan vs. Cute Kip/The Beautiful People [Special Referee: Traci Brooks]
This happens. Rhino beats Kip with the GORE GORE GORE GORE.
*1/2

In the back, Consequences Creed cuts a lame pro-America promo.

Match #3: Sheik Abdul Bashir [c] vs. Consequences Creed ["TNA X Division Championship"]
This is probably the least awful match they can have. I have a hard time calling it good, because it really wasn't, but it was average. Hot crowd helped, and they were helped by keeping it basic so that nobody could fuck anything up too badly. Bashir rolls up Creed with the ropes to win.
**

Hype video for the women's three way.

Match #4: Taylor Wilde [c] vs. Roxxi Laveaux vs. Awesome Kong w/ Raisha Saed [TNA Knockouts Championship]
This was really good, and for once I am upset that they only got 5 minutes. Kong was Kong, and ruled the shit. They knock Kong to the floor, and Taylor wins with a German Suplex. Why is she still champion? The upset was a great moment, but Kong needs the belt back already.
**1/4

In the back, AJ and Foley are talking and Team 3D comes in. Bubba tells AJ to stop being such a mark for this fat piece of crap, and AJ says he wouldn't call anyone fat if he was in his shoes. AJ leaves for his match, and Foley asks where Bubba got all those red flannels, and Bubba says from Mick's mother. YEAH! Team 3D says to stay out of their way, and they have a 21st title to win. They leave and Cornette comes back in looking happy. He says his business is done and he sends Foley off to go get ready.

Match #5: Beer Money [c] w/ Jackie Moore vs. LAX vs. Team 3D vs. Abyss/Matt Morgan [TNA World Tag Team Championship - Monster's Ball - Special Referee: Steve McMichael]
This wasn't great, but it was better than I remembered or expected. The LAX/BM stuff was amazing, and they had some cool spots. Problems arose when they wanted this to go 20 fucking minutes and when it was revealed how little Mongo cared about being a good referee. Really slow counts, missing pinfalls, getting in the way, etc. But yeah, I'll focus on the good parts. Awesome LAX dives, good build to a few huge table spots. Abyss takes his nutty bump through a flaming table. Really fantastic LAX/Beer Money run for a while, and then 3D gets back in. They hit Homicide with a 3D through a table with tacks on it, but Storm spits beer in D-Von's face and steals the pin to win!
**3/4

Hype video for the three way.

Match #6: AJ Styles vs. Christian Cage vs. Booker T w/ Sharmell
This was also better than expected, due to Booker being game for once. AJ and Christian are still the two best singles guys in the company, and a trying Booker T means he won't weigh them down. Tons of cool three way spots, and AJ vs. Christian finally gets the time to show off all their cool ideas against each other. Booker hits Christian with a Scissors Kick off the middle rope to win.
***

In the back, JB talks to Jarrett, and he dedicates this match to his three little girls.

In the back, Lauren talks to Kurt Angle. He says Foley is here to protect Jarrett tonight, but he'll go through Foley if he has to, and tells Jarrett's girls that eventually, their daddy will stop bleeding.

Hype video for Angle/Jarrett.

Match #7: Jeff Jarrett vs. Kurt Angle [Special Enforcer: Mick Foley]
Fantastic Jarrett carryjob. He is the best guy in years at channeling Angle into a good match. He has it so Angle dominates on the mat to get over the idea that he's rusty after being out, mostly, for 2 years. Jarrett then forces Angle into a brawl, AND JARRETT PLANCHA HAPPENS. They have an amazing slugfest due to Jarrett's incredible uppercuts. Becomes an Angle match at the end, but they don't go too nuts with it, with only one finisher kickout each. There is a ref bump, and Angle gets a chair. Foley tries to stop him, so Angle kills him with it. He hits JJ with it later, but then Foley pulls the ref out. He puts the Socko Claw on Angle, and then Jarrett breaks a guitar on Angle's head and Foley counts 3.
***

Hype video for Joe/Sting.

Match #8: Samoa Joe [c] vs. Sting [TNA World Heavyweight Championship]
Joe does his best to carry Sting, and succeeds, getting Sting's best TNA match. He drags Sting through a good crowd brawl and probably does a move that knocks his remaining greatness out of him when he does a Leaping Dropkick over some seats to Sting, but lands back-first on the fucking stairs. Joe then brings a good face/face bomb-fest in the ring at the end. Sting is a dick first and hits the Muscle Buster, BUT JOE STANDS RIGHT THE FUCK UP AND HEADBUTTS HIM IN THE TEMPLE FUCK YEAH! JOE HITS THE SCORPION DEATHDROP! FUCK YOU. This is basically the last appearance of the old Samoa Joe. Violent, urgent, mauling, huge bumps, disgusting strikes, etc. Joe starts trying for a win by a 10 count, and it's amazing. HE gets increasingly violent, going from knees to kicks to head kicks, and Sting gets up slower and slower. Kevin Nash comes out. Nash hits Joe with the bat to the back, and Sting wins with the Scorpion Deathdrop. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
***1/4

Really good match, but horrible booking. Sting goes on to defend the belt like 3 times in six months. The MEM doesn't need the title. Maybe they're even better without it. This is built up as the match that MAKES Joe, forever. But he loses. And Joe's pretty much dead here from now on. Doesn't matter that interference happens, because with the stip, he doesn't get a rematch anyways.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting, Since 10/12/2008
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY


TNA Impact
October 16th, 2008
Orlando, FL

Match #1: Motor City Machine Guns vs. Sheik Abdul Bashir/Sonjay Dutt w/ SoCal Val

I guess the Guns are babyfaces again now. The Guns do stuff for 3-4 minutes and Shelley beats Dutt with a Frog Splash.
*1/2

Kurt angle comes out and he hits both Shelley and Sabin with chair shots. He gets on the mic and says Bound For Glory was not a one-shot deal, and he'll go through the entire roster if he has to to get Jeff Jarrett in a rematch, because he was robbed.

In the back, JB asks Nash why he did what he did. Nash says he stood in that ring 10 months ago when Samoa Joe disrespected Scott Hall and disrespected him, and apparently despite that photoshoot, Joe hasn't watched nearly enough mob movies, because what he did was keeping his friends close, and his enemies closer.

Sting comes out and he gets on the mic. He says it should be Samoa Joe standing here, and admits that Joe was the better man at Bound For Glory, and he bit off more than he can chew. Sting says Joe's disrespect is why he's not here tonight as Champion. Sting says after the show, some people shook his hand, but there was a group of people who didn't, and AJ Styles wasn't one of them. AJ comes out and says Samoa Joe is in his friend, and says respect is a two way street, and if Sting wants respect, he has to give some back. He says six years ago, it was he, Low Ki, and Chris Daniels who busted their ass to make this thing happen, and the last year, it's gotten down to just he and Joe, and he's making money for this company while Sting leeches money from it, and AJ congratulates him on the win and says he can't wait to see his next match at Bound For Glory 2009. FUCK YEAH AJ. Sting says they've talked before and AJ has said he didn't like how his dad raised him, but he's turning out just like his dad, and AJ punches him and they have a pull-apart. AGAIN, HERE'S THE THING. IF YOU'RE GOING TO BRING UP SOME PERSONAL ISSUE, FINE. BUT YOU HAVE TO ESTABLISH IT FIRST. THAT'S WHY ANGLE'S JAB AT JARRETT'S WIFE BEING DEAD WAS SUCH A BIG DEAL, BECAUSE THEY HAD SPENT A LOT OF TIME BUILDING UP JARRETT'S PROBLEMS. FUCK YOU, JIM CORNETTE.

In the back, Kurt Angle beats the fuck out of the Prince Justice Brotherhood.

In the back, Booker T says he will reveal the contents of the briefcase next week in Las Vegas, when Impact is live!

Match #2: Booker T w/ Sharmell vs. Hernandez
This happens. Hernandez is very very exposed in a singles match against someone who doesn't care about having a good match like Booker T. Booker hits him with the briefcase and then the Scissors Kick for the win.
*3/4

In the back, Kurt Angle beats the fuck out of Rave and Rock. I can't say I'm that upset with his choices so far.

In the back, Roxxi challenges Kong to a match.

In the back, Lauren is interviewing TBP when Christy goes to meet Rock and Rave in the hospital. TBP mock her for having red hair. She tries to fight, but they beat her down and Kip puts the brown bag on her head.

Kurt Angle comes out, and he attacks David Penzer. He throws him in the ring and takes off Penzer's show and beats him with it. He puts on the Ankle Lock and tons of referees come out to break it up. Jeff Jarrett comes out and Kurt lets go. Angle demands his rematch, and Jarrett says he has other business to attend to, and tells Kurt to let it go and focus on the title or something. Angle says he knows where Jarrett lives and he can't be home all the time, so Jarrett attacks Angle, and they have a good pull-apart.

Mick Foley comes out and thanks the TNA fans, and says he's had a fun ride the last few weeks. He says goodbye, and goes to leave, but Jeff Jarrett comes out. He tells Mick to give him 10 minutes of his time in the back, because he has a business proposition for him, and they leave together.

Jim Cornette calls in, because he's apparently too busy to come to his fucking job, and books Angle vs. Matt Morgan tonight, just so he can continue to fuck the entire show over.

Match #3: Roxxi vs. Raisha Saed w/ Awesome Kong
Decent enough match. Roxxi wins with the Voodoo Drop.
*1/4

Kong beats down Roxxi and lays her out with the Awesome Bomb.

In the back, Lauren interviews Morgan. He thanks Cornette for the opportunity tonight, and dedicates this match to his friend Chris Parks, who went through a flaming table last Sunday. If he's your friend, you can at least get his last name right. It's even on his gear now, you big fucking goof.

Match #4: Kevin Nash vs. Consequences Creed
SQUASH. Jackknife ends it. The crowd refuses to boo Nash.
*

Nash gets on the mic and says the new generation here is either the most arrogant or the stupidest group of guys he's ever seen. Nash says if Joe remembered what he said about Scott Hall, then he wouldn't have trusted him so easily, and says the only people number than Joe and AJ are the fans. He says the reason people hate him is because he's the smartest guy to ever play this game. The fans still won't boo, so he says their wives all want a night with Big Sexy, and says it looks like the guys who have some respect are finally realizing strength in numbers.

In the back, JB peaks into the Jarrett office, and he shakes hands with Foley, and Foley leaves.

Match #5: Kurt Angle vs. Matt Morgan
Short. Horrible. Nothing to see here. Angle gets the Angle Slam to win.
3/4*

Angle attacks post-match, until Abyss runs out to save. Angle then comes back in and beats up Abyss' back with a chair, and he sells it a lot because of fire damage.

In the parking lot, JB catches up with Jarett and Foley and they have a BIG ANNOUNCEMENT FOR NEXT WEEK.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting, Since 10/12/2008
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Taylor Wilde, Since 7/10/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY


TNA Impact
October 23rd, 2008
Las Vegas, NV


They are running a from a convention hall in the Hard Rock Hotel, and it's a cool venue. But TNA doesn't get more than like 500 people there, and it ends up looking like an indy show with a high price tag. Looks less full than the ROH shows from the New Yorker hotel in 2005-6, and that was a super cramped looking venue.

Match #1: Christy Hemme vs. Velvet Sky w/ Angelina Love & Cute Kip
This was not a good match. That should come as no surprise. Christy wins with that weird Firecrotch Legdrop.
1/49*

In the back, JB is with Kurt Angle. He says Angle has a huge announcement that will trump Foley's announcement. Angle says he made a few phonecalls, and by midnight last night, the deal was done. The camera pans over to Booker and Sharmell. Booker is now doing an African accent and he says in his country, the lion runs in packs, and Jeremiah, these are de lions. And they demand RESPEC. The camera pans and Kevin Nash is also there. He says he did leave, but this business is about money, power, and respect. RESPEC. Joe gave him no respect. RESPEC. He says he helped Joe, and Joe spit in his face to make it personal. JB says there's only three of them, and Angle points off screen, AND STING WALKS IN IN A SUIT! Sting asks why anyone should be surprised. He says they tried individually to get a little respect. RESPEC. Sting says to have their party, and he'll be here for business. He leaves and Angle toasts to the Main Event Mafia.

Booker T comes out and opens the briefcase to reveal a title belt. Booker T says it is the TNA Legends Championship, and it belongs to him and only him. Christian Cage comes out and says a legend is someone whose track record is such that they command respect, not demand respect, and asks Booker when he switched from British to African. Booker T brushes it off and he says a King is a King. He says Christian belongs with them in the MEM. Christian challenges him for the title at Genesis, and Booker says he'll accept, but if Christian loses, he has to join the MEM, and he accepts. Christian's leaving soon :(

In the back, JB asks Jarrett about the announcement, and he says it's not his to make.

Match #2: Sheik Abdul Bashir [c] vs. Jay Lethal [TNA X Division Championship]
This wasn't bad. Not good, and too short to develop into anything more, but not bad. Sheik wins in like 3 minutes with the WMD.
*1/2

In the back, Lauren interviews AJ and Joe. AJ says six years ago, TNA was the place for young talent to go to get opportunities and attention, but it's not like that anymore. He says he doesn't know how it got to this, but it's about TNA now. Joe says Frankenstein is coming home tonight.

In the back, Lauren interviews Sheik, and he tries to cut his promo, but Rhino comes over. He shoves him and defends America, so Sheik cheap shots him with the belt and chokes him out with his head dress.

WHOISSUICIDE.COM

Match #3: Beer Money w/ Jackie Moore vs. LAX vs. Team 3D vs. Abyss/Matt Morgan [Hardcore Gauntlet]
This is a classic TNA overgimmicking display. There are timed entrances. Beer Money are in for most of the match, enabling them to get some good carrying in. LAX joins soon, and Abyss and Morgan are thankfully last. It gets down to Team 3D vs. Beer Money, and that is solid. They hit Roode with the 3D, but Jackie pulls the ref out. Storm spits beer in Bubba's face and rolls him up to win.
**1/4

Kurt Angle comes out and says the MEM will change wrestling, somehow. He again calls out Jeff Jarrett and asks if he has to convince Jeff's daughters first. Jeff Jarrett comes out and says TNA has its best roster ever, because I guess he still thinks it's June 2006 (when LAX was fully formed, AMW was together, and before filth like Kaz, Kurt Angle, Booker, Daivari, etc. came in), so there's no reason for him to be in the ring. He says it's about guys like AJ and Joe now, and Kurt says he is TNA and the greatest of all time. Jarrett says there's a lot of guys in the back who want to wrestle Kurt, and Abyss runs out and runs him out of the ring. OH MY GOD NO. WHY?

Match #4: Taylor Wilde [c] vs. Awesome Kong w/ Raisha Saed [TNA Knockouts Championship]
Really amazing 3 minutes. The Wilde nearfalls were done super well, and Kong FINALLY murders Wilde with the Awesome Bomb to regain the belt.
**1/4

Match #5: AJ Styles/Samoa Joe vs. Sting/Kevin Nash

This could have been good, theoretically, if it was longer than 3 minutes. Nash hits Joe with the title belt and pins him easily. UGH. JOE :(
*3/4

The MEM then kills AJ and Joe, summing up this angle in one night. I get it. Really. The new heel stable that seems like a supergroup has to be dominant. But when you totally kill your top two babyfaces like this, it does nothing. This is why you need mid-level faces. Why the fuck is Rhino feuding with Bashir? He'd be great for this. LAX? Eric Young? Jay Lethal?

Anyways, Mick Foley comes out and his announcement is that he is now a major shareholder. This means Jim Cornette can be phased out in favor of Foley, which is nice.

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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting, Since 10/12/2008
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Awesome Kong, Since 10/23/2008
TNA Legends Champion: Booker T, Since 10/23/2008


TNA Impact
October 30th, 2008
Orlando, FL


AJ and Joe are in the ring, and AJ has the mic. He says he thanks Mick Foley for the moral support, but this is their war to fight. He asks where all of those in the back were last week and asks who wants to cross the line to stand with them. Jay Lethal is first, and then Creed, Petey, ODB, and Eric Young. Stellar lineup. Shelley gets on the mic and asks why any of them should risk their necks for their little war. Joe says it's not his war or AJ's war, it's all of their wars. Joe slaps Shelley and says to wake up, but Sabin holds Shelley back. The MEM come out and say this is a disgrace and they contrast the young generation with them, and says they're like a family. Nash says he tried to teach Joe how to act, and he spat in his face, and says the reason Hall never showed is because Joe didn't deserve the rub. Booker says by the end of the night, the five of them would be even stronger.

Match #1: ODB/Christy Hemme vs. The Beautiful People w/ Cute Kip
Short, worthless. Faces win.
1/2*

In the back, Sabin goes up to Joe and says he thought about it and says he talked to Alex, and they're in. Joe nods and says they'll really see who's in when the shots get fired.

In the back, Eric Young is with JB, and he says this is his company too, and he's not leaving. I don't get this. The MEM is only like 4 guys, and they don't really want to put the company out. They just want the top spots. It's not like Eric Young is an ambitious motherfucker, so why does he care?

Match #2: Eric Young vs. James Storm w/ Jackie Moore
ERIC YOUNG HAD CONFIDENCE! This was good, since Storm brings out the best in EY. Solid 4 minutes and Eric wins with a roll up after ducking the Superkick.
**

Roode attacks post-match, but the MCMG run out to save, and they fight Beer Money out of the ring.

In the back, Kong/Saed and Wilde/Roxxi are brawling and they get pulled apart.

Sheik Abdul Bashit comes out to do commentary.

Match #3: Motor City Machine Guns vs. Hiroshi Tanahashi/Volador Jr.
Really good spotfest. Volador looks really great here. Awesome and graceful flip dive, and smooth lucha stuff. MCMG are good as usual. Sabin beats Volador with the Cradle Shock.
**3/4

Sheik comes in and yells at Volador for losing to an American, so Rhino comes ot and Gores him.

In the back, Lauren interviews Christian. He says the match will be at Turning Point, since they now switched Genesis to January. Christian says Booker T doesn't even know hi sown identity, and the side he'll end up on is the same one he'll always be on, and that's his side.

Match #4: AJ Styles/Samoa Joe vs. Booker T/Kevin Nash
This is more like it, at least in terms of booking. Joe sort of tries, and AJ carries the MEM. Joe is not good as a face in peril. AJ avoids the Scissors Kick and hits the Pele to win.
**

In the back, Lauren talks to Abyss and Morgan. Morgan says Abyss isn't ready for Angle, but Abyss says his burns are fine, and he thanks Morgan and Lauren for being concerned.

Mick Foley comes out and talks about how he is now an Executive Shareholder. He takes credit for Impact now being in HD, and he books Joe vs. Nash and Sting vs. AJ for the belt at Turning Point. Sting comes out without the paint and in a suit, and he gets a mic. Foley says he gives Sting credit for putting his name on the map in 1992, so it hurts him to see Sting standing with the MEM and asks why. He says as a veteran champion, Sting can be the glue to hold everything together, but he's acting more like a wedge that drives everyone apart. Sting says he wants to hold it all together, but the kids need to learn respect. He says they'll disrespect Foley too, and tells Foley that this isn't his war, but it is his.

Match #5: Kurt Angle vs. Abyss
Hey, terrible. At least it is not long, as Angle snaps and beats Abyss with a chair for the DQ.
3/4*

Matt Morgan comes out to save when Angle attacks the back with his fingernails. Booker T and Nash come out and beat up Morgan like the piece of shit he is. All of the originals come out to fight, AND SCOTT STEINER RETURNS AND KILLS THE FRONTLINE WITH A PIPE! YES! AJ tries to fight them and spits in Sting's fae, so Sting lays him out last with a Scorpion Deathdrop.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting, Since 10/12/2008
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Awesome Kong, Since 10/23/2008
TNA Legends Champion: Booker T, Since 10/23/2008


TNA Impact
November 6th, 2008
Orlando, FL


The MEM comes out and Angle introduces Scott Steiner as their hitman. Steiner grabs the mic and yells that before he came to TNA, he didn't know who anyone was in this company, and these punks don't know what's good for them. Samoa Joe and the Frontline comes out and he says if he could understand half of what Steiner said, he might be mad. He says he has Scott Steiner tonight, and after he chokes him out, he's coming for Nash. Christian Cage then comes and stands with Joe. He says he's not picking a side, but he doesn't mind helping the younger generation.

In the back, JB talks to Foley. He says he has something to tell AJ, but he wants to do it in the ring.

Match #1: Christian Cage/Motor City Machine Guns vs. Booker T/Beer Money w/ Sharmell & Jackie Moore
I guess the MEM and Beer Money are cool. This is one of those matches where there's simply too much talent involved for it to be anything but great. That is of course, only theoretical greatness, since this gets under 5 minutes. Good preview of both matches for the PPV, and Booker hits Christian with his belt for the win.
**1/4

In the back, Kurt Angle is held back by security in the Jarrett/Foley office. Angle demands his rematch and Jarrett says it's over. Angle threatens his kids again, and Foley holds back Jarrett.

A video airs of both MEM and Originals talkin about the feud. Sting says they draw the money and Kurt says legends fighting is why people buy TNA PPVs. This is hilarious given that it's common knowledge that the first Angle/Joe match drew easily the highest TNA buyrate ever/

In the back, Kong and Saed jump Roxxi and Taylor Wilde.

Match #2: LAX vs. Team 3D vs. Abyss/Matt Morgan vs. Hiroshi Tanahashi/Volador Jr. [#1 Contender's Ladder Match]
SUP RUSSO. I've learned to tell the difference between Russo and Cornette fingerprints. Russo does unannounced gimmick matches and stupid irrelevant shit that annoys you and blatantly says everything is bullshit. But it's pretty easy to blow off, because it can lead to good matches if the roster is good and gets time on PPV. Or even if they get 10 minutes on TV. Cornette? Cornette brings in shitty guys (which isn't to say Russo doesn't, but Cornette's guys are more obviously terrible), and builds to matches nobody gives a fuck about and then has an angle every few months that goes EVERYTHING ELSE IS FAKE, BUT MY GOD, THIS ONE'S REAL. Two sides of the same terrible coin, but Russo is capable of highs Cornette isn't. I write that because it's more interesting than this match. Team 3D maybe wins, but Beer Money comes out to cost them for whatever reason, and Abyss and Morgan win. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
*1/2

Mick Foley comes out and introduces the #1 Contender, AJ Styles! AJ comes out and Mick said a few years back when TNA was getting off the ground, Mick asked his friend Raven about AJ, and he said the kid is phenomenal. He puts over all AJ's done, and says right now, he views AJ as TNA's president elect or the heir apparent. Sting comes out and says these kids want everything spoon fed to them (like how Sting got a title shot without wrestling for 6 months). Sting says it's a matter of time until they disrespect Foley too, and as a former World Champion, he's welcome in the MEM. Styles says he's earned everything, and Sting gets handed a World Title shot every year despite not being around for half the year. Sting says AJ's dad threw him out when he was young, and asks AJ what his son will think when he sees him lose at Turning Point, and AJ punches him. Sting rolls out. This feels very forced.

Match #3: Awesome Kong/Raisha Saed vs. Taylor Wilde/Rhaka Khan
Short, but Kong destroying Wilde was a lot of fun. Khan turns on Wilde, and attacks her. She then feeds her into an Awesome Bomb for the win.
*1/4

Horrible pre-tape with Tenay and Sheik.

Match #4: Sting/Kurt Angle/Kevin Nash vs. Eric Young/Lethal Consequences
Enjoyable squash, due about 95% to the young guys taking gigantic bumps and then jobbing. LOLTNA. Angle beats Creed with the Angle Slam.
*1/2

In the back, Rhino yells for America. This feud is the worst.

Match #5: Samoa Joe vs. Scott Steiner
These two are great together, but this was only 4 minutes, so they couldn't really get going like you would want. Joe takes huge bumps. Nash comes out and Joe wipes him out with the Elbow Suicida. He gets back in, but Steiner hits him with brass knucks to win. LOL SAMOA JOE :(
**

Sting then comes out and points his bat down at Joe.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting, Since 10/12/2008
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Awesome Kong, Since 10/23/2008
TNA Legends Champion: Booker T, Since 10/23/2008

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TNA Turning Point 2008
November 9th, 2008
Orlando, FL

Match #1: Jay Lethal vs. Eric Young vs. Homicide vs. Sonjay Dutt vs. Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Consequences Creed vs. Doug Williams vs. Volador Jr. vs. Jimmy Rave vs. Petey Williams [X Division Rankings Elimination Match]

It's a total spotfest mess, but it wat least got 17 minutes to develop. This was a waste of Homicide, but since LAX is basically done now, I suppose I need to get used to that. Volador, Lethal, Homicide, Doug, and Young all looked great. Nobody looked bad, due to the number of guys preventing your bad wrestlers from being in too long. No reason to go over every elimination. Gets down to Eric and Lethal, and they have a surprisingly good run. Eric shockingly wins with a Northern Lights Suplex.
**1/2

In the back, Lauren is with Mick and Jeff. Jarrett says they need to take the bullets out of some of these guns, and says he'll talk to the Mafia, and tells Mick to talk to the kids.

Match #2: Taylor Wilde/Roxxi vs. Awesome Kong/Raisha Saed w/ Rhaka Khan
Decent match. Taylor beats Saed with a German Suplex.
*3/4

In the back, Jarrett talks to the MEM and asks them to keep it professional. Angle says until he grows some balls and fights him, his word means nothing, and he leaves. Nash asks Jeff if it's going to be like this and says he needs to worry more about the children on the other side. Jarrett says this is his company and future, and Nash tells him that this is his future.

Match #3: Rhino vs. Sheik Abdul Bashir
And this totally blew. Rhino wins with the Gore after referee Sewell shoves him.
*

In the back, Mick Foley talks to the young guys. Shelley shit talks him and says they don't care about this, they just joined for more airtime and money. Foley says he'll ignore that because if he didn't, he would have to acknowledge that maybe Sting is right. He says he invested in TNA because he has faith in their generation. Shelley tells him to get his dumpy ass back to the desk, and Lethal and Creed shove him. MCMG leave, and AJ tries to calm down the younger blacks.

Scott Hall and his faggot Juggalo friends are in the front row, but nobody mentions it at all.

Match #4: Beer Money [c] w/ Jackie Moore vs. Motor City Machine Guns [TNA World Tag Team Championship]
This gets 17 minutes and it is great. Takes a little bit to get going can actually say a TNA match with all young great wrestlers goes too long, but it picks up huge when Shelley gets isolated. Beer Money has maybe their best control segment. Tenay drops a bombshell of retardation when he says "We've always suspected how good James Storm would be in a tag team". Like he didn't spent the first four and half years of TNA in a fucking incredible tag team. Only real issue here is a shitty crowd. This could be in part because TNA is booking the Guns as heels ans has been for months, but now they're suddenly babyfaces for this match. Awesome finishing run, and Sabin is blinded with beer spit, and he then gets beat with the DWI.
***

Hype video for Booker/Christian.

Match #5: Booker T [c] w/ Sharmell vs. Christian Cage [TNA Legends Championship - If Christian Loses, He Joins MEM]
Christian's final match, I do believe. And it's sort of just a match. Booker is mailing it in big time. He randomly switches his focus for no reason at points, grabbing holds just for something to do. And since he has no focus, Christian can't carry it with any awesome selling. He still tries hard, but he can only do so much. Booker gets a roll up with the ropes to win.
**1/4

In the back, Abyss cuts a horrible promo with Lauren and Matt Morgan.

Match #6: Kurt Angle vs. Abyss [Falls Count Anywhere]
This blows. It is completely flawed at the core of the match. A FCA match involves lots of arena brawling and striking is a basic thing to do there. So when running a FCA match, you need guys with good punches or chops or something. Abyss has the worst punches in the history of pro wrestling, and Angle's look horrible against the big man, since Abyss bumps way too much for them. So out of 17 minutes or so, at least 5-6 is filled with these horrible punches, and nothing really happening in the brawl. The Impact Zone is way too small and packed in for any coherent crowd brawl, since there's no props or painful looking parts of the building. This is where the Asylum was perfect. People remember this and put it over for Angle's flip dive off the stage, which is a really cool spit, but it's involved in Angle/AJ, so cite that awesome match instead. They kick out of finishers. Angle shoves Abyss off a small scaffold through the Spanish table to win.
*1/4

Hype video for Joe/Nash.

Match #7: Samoa Joe vs. Kevin Nash
This is better than it should have been, since Joe refuses to go quietly into being irrelevant for the next 4 years before his weird resurgence in the BFG series. This was way better than it had any right to be too, despite the booking being awful at the end. Nash is willing to actually bump and sell, so Joe tries hard. He kicks out of TWO Jackknife Powerbombs, which is awesome. Then Nash got a low blow and pinned him with his feet on the ropes. Doesn't matter how cheap. TNA isn't one to emphasize how wins and losses happen, just that they do, so it's Joe losing AGAIN after BFG and the MEM's 3rd or 4th top guy beating Joe. Not sure how the creative idea for Joe to somehow regain his momentum after BFG by losing to MEM in every match happened.
**3/4

Hype video for Sting/AJ.

Match #8: Sting [c] vs. AJ Styles [TNA World Heavyweight Championship]
Sting is a good heel on the mic and in backstage stuff, but for obvious reasons, he cannot work as a heel in the ring at all. So this isn't that good. AJ does his best, but it takes too long to get going, and then Sting's control seg is really mediocre. Great finishing run though. AJ is going up top, but Angle and booker come out. AJ gets rid of both, but misses the Pele and Sting rolls him up for 3.
**1/2
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting, Since 10/12/2008
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA X-Division Champion: Nobody
TNA Knockouts Champion: Awesome Kong, Since 10/23/2008
TNA Legends Champion: Booker T, Since 10/23/2008


TNA Impact
November 13th, 2008
Orlando, FL


In the ring, the TNA orifinals are there and Mick Foley comes out. He singles out AJ and Joe and MCMG and Lethal Consequences and says none of them should be embarrassed. Shelley mimes jerking off, and Foley tells him to listen for once, and says maybe there's reason that he and his partner are the best team to NEVER win the titles, because they can't take anything seriously. He books EY/Sheik for the X Title tonight, Joe/AJ vs. Beer Money for the tag belts, and Lethsl/Sting for the World Title.

In the back, Christian arrives in the MEM locker room. Angle says they're going to hold a welcoming party for him tonight.

Match #1: Taylor Wilde/Roxxi vs. Awesome Kong/Rhaka Khan w/ Raisha Saed
This was much worse than the PPV, due to getting like 3 minutes and Khan being literally the worst. kong kills Roxxi with the Awesome Bomb to win. Not nearly enough Kong.
3/4*

In the back, Lauren interviews MCMG. Shelley says Joe and AJ aren't even a tag team, and they should get a rematch with Beer Money based on how they were robbed on Sunday. Shelley says they'll get back to the front of the line again, by any means necessary.

Match #2: Sheik Abdul Bashir [c] vs. Eric Young ["TNA X Division Championship]
Referee is Shane Sewell again. They do stuff, and it's not awful. Eric tries really hard. Sheik shoves Sewell and even hits him, so instead of a DQ, he hits Bashir a lot. He dropkicks him, and Eric then gets a Victory Roll to win the belt.
*3/4

Everyone comes out to celebrate with Eric, but that idiot Earl Hebner comes out to yell at Sewell for being unprofessional. EARL FUCKING HEBNER IS YELLING AT A REFEREE FOR BEING A BAD REFEREE. HOOOOOOOOOOOOOLY SHIT.

ROUGH CUT WITH HERNANDEZ. This is how it should be done. Use the segments to give more background on guys that the fans already like. Hindsight is of course 20/20, so it's easy to say now that splitting up LAX and pushing Hernandez as a top face is a terrible idea, but nobody knew how expose he would be in singles matches at that point.

In the back, JB interviews the MEM. Booker says Eric Young didn't beat one of them, so his accomplishment, while big for him, is ultimately irrelevant to them. Petey Williams tries to come in, but Booker yells at him to get out. Steiner calms him down and says if Petey wants to talk privately, to come to him after his match, and they hug and Petey leaves.

In the back, Lauren talks to Lethal. He says god bless his new black President and god bless his new boss for this title shot. Petey comes over and wishes him luck. Lethal says to be careful about Steiner, and Petey nods and leaves.

Kurt Angle comes out to do commentary.

Match #3: Scott Steiner vs. Rhino
This happens for 4 minutes until Angle interferes and Steiner hits a T-Bone to win.
*1/2

In the back, JB interviews Sting. He says the reason the originals can't beat them is because they don't even respect each other.

Match #4: Sting [c] vs. Jay Lethal [TNA World Heavyweight Championship]
This is relatively short at some 5-6 minutes, but it was probably better as a result, as half of it as a Jay Lethal rally. Which is a ton of fun as always, even if he's no longer as great as he was in 04-06. MCMG come out to try and help, but Lethal throws them out and Sting hits the Deathdrop to win.
**1/4

AJ, Joe, Creed, Petey, and EY come out to yell at MCMG for costing Lethal the match. AS THAT HAPPENS, STEINER BEATS THE SHIT OUT OF PETEY IN THE BACK! YEAH!

CROSS THE LINE.

Team 3D comes out to do commentary.

Match #5: Beer Money [c] w/ Jackie Moore vs. AJ Styles/Samoa Joe [TNA World Tag Team Championship]
This was so close to being a great match before the booking happened. Awesome stooging by Roode and Storm, and then their control seg on Joe was great. AJ is the best hot tag in TNA. I know they never feud, but I'm hoping for some kind of AJ/Daniels vs. Beer Money TV match in 2009, just so I can see how Beer Money truly stacks up to AMW in a similar situation. Storm spits beer at the Dudleys, so Bubba gets in and spits beer in his face for a DQ.
**3/4

Team 3D runs off Beer Money, and they have words with AJ and Joe, but no argument.

In a pretape, TBP and Kip invite Sarah Palin to Impact. God fucking damnit.

Main event Mafia comes out to end the show, and Angle welcomes their new member, Christian Cage. He comes out, and Angle says they left him a suit to wear, and he should respect his new family and wear the suit. Angle says Sting has the most experience and the title, Steiner has the muscle, Nash has the brains, Booker T has the Legend's Title, and he has the leadership ability. Angle says he's heard Christian is going back up North. Christian doesn't say anything, and he grabs the mic. He says that's his announcement to make, but the truth is, he's accomplished everything to accomplish in TNA, Angle says they all got the same offer, but they turned it down to build this family. He says the truth is, this is a going away pary, because this is his last night in TNA, AND THEY ALL ATTACK. They beat Christian up with all their finishers, and pose over him to end the show. :(
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting, Since 10/12/2008
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA X-Division Champion: Eric Young, Since 11/13/2008
TNA Knockouts Champion: Awesome Kong, Since 10/23/2008
TNA Legends Champion: Booker T, Since 10/23/2008


TNA Impact
November 20th, 2008
Orlando, FL


The MEM is in the ring to open the show with a casket, and Angle says they are here tonight to bid farewell to Christan Cage's career. He says Christian failed to commit to either TNA or the Main Event Mafia last week, and they did what they had to do, because if you're not with them, then you're against them. Rhino comes out and he says if any of them had a problem with Christian leaving, then they should have taken it up in the back. Rhino says now they have him to deal with, and he runs out to fight them. They beat on him after a bit, and Booker lays him out with the Legends Title.

In the back, JB talks to Jarrett and Foley, and Jarrett says they're taking back the house tonight.

Match #1: Lethal Consequences vs. Hiroshi Tanahashi/Sonjay Dutt w/ SoCal Val
Decent match. They got 4 minutes to do spots. Lethal beats Dutt with the Lethal Combination.
*3/4

In the back, TBP cut an average promo, promising makeovers, and the highlight is Kip James using a feather boa as a makeshift cock and jerking it off behind them.

In the back, JB is in Cornette's office (WHAT THE FUCK?! THERE'S THREE AUTHORITY FIGURES NOW?) and he yells at referee Shane Sewell. Eric Young comes in and Cornette vacates the X Title, and says to make it up to him, he can have a shot at Booker T's belt.

Match #2: The Beautiful People w/ Cute Kip vs. Christy Hemme/Sojourner Bolt
This is a short match. Hemme is beat after Love's Bicycle Kick.
3/4*

ROUGH CUT WITH HOMICIDE. This is the best one yet, as he has a cool story with being a drug dealer/gang member, and then became a wrestler after having a son so that he could give him a better life. They interviewed Monsta Mack for an interview bit too. Shame they couldn't get an interview with J-Train.

ODB has a horrible new talk show. Sharmell is on it, and they have words, and agree to a match at Final Resolution. OH COME ON, NO.

In the back, JB interviews the MEM. Angle says the family is doing good tonight. Angle suggests him vs. Jarrett at Final Resolution, and then says maybe AJ and Joe can pick two other guys to fight the rest of the Mafia too.

Match #3: AJ Styles/Samoa Joe vs. Motor City Machine Guns
This was awesome. Got like 7-8 minutes, so they got to do a ton of cool stuff. Shelley/AJ was amazing and continues to be on the list of best pairings that have never had a real match. I mean, they had a great 6 minute B-show match in 2004, but they're both capable of so much more. Lots of cool spots and counters, and Joe beats Sabin with the Muscle Buster.
***

Angle, Nash, Steiner, and Booker come out and they attack AJ and Joe. They attack the Guns too, and Lethal Consequences comes out to fight, but they also get laid out. Sting comes onto the stage to watch. The booking of MEM is flawed in a lot of ways that I'll eventually go into at some point probably, but I like how Sting isn't involved in any of the dirty work, and eventually leaves because he can no longer reconcile what they're doing with his morals. Good continuity of character.

In the back, AJ and Joe and Lethal and Creed are in the back hurt. Rhino comes in and says not to ever give up. He says he put all his blood and sweat and he helped build a company named ECW 10 years ago (pretty sure Rhino had nothing to do with building a god damn thing there), and despite that name being bastardized now with the worst wrestling show on TV (actually by late 2008, ECW had become the best and most consistent TV wrestling show since Smackdown in 2002-3). He says he won't let it happen to TNA, because he also built this up from nothing, and he will fight with them until his very last drop of blood. That promo was based on three gigantic lies, that Rhino built ECW, that ECW on SciFi sucks, and that Rhino was with TNA from the beginning, but he at least has a lot of passion.

In the back, Saed and Kong demand that Tracy gives them competition.

Match #4: Booker T [c] w/ Sharmell v.s. Eric Young [TNA Legends Championship]
This is a match. Eric is good, but he's not someone who can carry Booker, who can't even try on PPV, let alone on TV. Booker wins clean with the Scissors Kick.
*1/2

In the back, JB interviews Team 3D. He says for two months now, Beer Money has been getting into their business. Bubba says they're a great tag team, lots of promise, but they're in their first reign, and they've had 20, and they need to learn some damn respect.

In the back, Kong beats the shit out of Hermie Sadler. YES. FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC.

Match #5: Kurt Angle/Kevin Nash vs. Abyss/Matt Morgan
Awful. Just the worst. Beer Money comes out to scout their #1 Contenders. Storm breaks his bottle on Abyss' head from the apron, and Nash pins him to win.
3/4*

Mick Foley comes out to end the show and wastes a lot of time talking about the MEM vs. Originals feud. He says he has officially signed Sting/Booker/Steiner/Nash vs. Joe/AJ/two partners of their choosing for Final Resolution. He says the title will be on the line, and if the originals win, then AJ Styles will win the title! Why only AJ? He then also books Angle vs. Rhino for the PPV. Angle comes out, and he is upset. Angle says he doesn't blame Mick for this, but asks why Jeff Jarrett won't face him. He says he's gotten everything in life that he's wanted, and now he wants a rematch with Jeff Jarrett. He says actually, he does blame Foley, because Foley cost him the match at BFG. He challenges Foley to a match instead, and slaps him. Jeff Jarrett comes out and says Kurt will play by the rules like everyone else, and he won't let him tear down his cr4eation. Jarrett says he can't fire Angle because of a contract clause, but if Angle loses at the PPV, his contract will become void. Wait, what? Why? I mean, I want Angle gone too, but what the fuck? Makes no sense. He says if Angle wins, he gets his rematch. Rhino then comes out and Gores Kurt.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

TNA World Heavyweight Champion: Sting, Since 10/12/2008
TNA World Tag Team Champions: Beer Money, Since 8/10/2008 - LONGEST REIGNING CHAMPION CURRENTLY
TNA X-Division Champion: Vacant
TNA Knockouts Champion: Awesome Kong, Since 10/23/2008
TNA Legends Champion: Booker T, Since 10/23/2008


TNA Impact
November 27th, 2008
Orlando, FL


Rhino has the originals gathered in the ring and he gives another speech. He dubs them the TNA Frontline, which blows. He says they don't have the experience of the Main Event Mafia, so they'll have to add more numbers. Kurt Angle comes out and says nobody else is stupid enough to join, because everyone loves and respects the Main event Mafia. He says he'll tear through Rhino at FR to get to Jeff Jarrett, and tells him to reconsider, or he'd end up in a body bag. Rhino tells Kurt to kiss his ass.

TONIGHT: THE TURKEY BOWL

In the back, JB tells Angle that Jarrett has made Foley the enforcer for Angle/Rhino and Angle storms off in a huff.

Match #1: Rhino vs. Hernandez vs. Sonjay Dutt [Turkey Bowl Qualifying Match]
Decent match. Hernandez hurling around Dutt was fun. Dutt gets beat with the Gore.
*1/2

In the back, Angle and JB go into Jarrett's office. Angle asks why he's doing this and Jarrett says Foley is there to maintain order, and if any MEM members get involved, he will personally tear up Angle's contract on the spot.

In the back, Rhino has negotiated a sit-down between Joe and AJ and Team 3D. Rhino says they want them on the team for Final Resolution, as the greatest tag team of all time. Rhino says AJ and Joe are in the same place they were 10 years ago, they're kids trying to make a name for themselves. They're fucking former World Champions, they HAVE made a name for themselves. God fucking damnit. Rhino asks if they have another war in them, and Team 3D asks what's in it for them. Joe says nothing's in it for them, just doing what's right for once in their lives. AJ says they want an answer by the end of the night. This sucks. Team 3D bring nothing to the table as babyfaces, and have had a shockingly great year as heels since last fall. Plus, you can use this as a way to really elevate two other guys by having them with AJ and Joe. LAX is the obvious choice, but it doesn't have to be. Could be the Guns, could be Lethal and...not Creed. Never Creed. But Lethal and someone else.

Match #2: Kip James vs. Consequences Creed vs. Alex Shelley [Turkey Bowl Qualifying Match]
Shelley did his best, and him vs. Creed was fun. Shelley bets Creed with a mouse trap pin with the tights.
*3/4

In the back, TBP receive a latter and it says The Governor will be coming to TNA next week. Y'ALL NIGGERS FUCKED NOW. It's probably not that The Governor though. :(

A Rough Cut on LAX airs, with them talking about how natural they are as a tag team. Hernandez says Homicide has also helped him a -- NEVERMIND THAT SHIT.

Posted Image

YEAH YEAH YEAH. YEAH YEAH YEAH. BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBDAT. BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBDAT.

In the back, Jeff Jarrett thanks Rhino for helping the kids, but asks him to focus on Kurt for the good of the company.

In the back, Lauren talks to Team 3D and Bubba says nobody gives them an ultimatum. Scott Steiner comes over and he says he thinks they should talk business, and says the Main Event Mafia heard what they said last week about respect, and they agree.

Match #3: Matt Morgan vs. Jimmy Rave vs. Sheik Abdul Bashir [Turkey Bowl Qualifying Match]
This happened and totally blew. Sheik beats Rave with the WMD.
1/2*

It will be Rhino vs. Shelley vs. Bashit, which is a huge step down from Joe/AJ/Sabin in 2007.

In the back, Booker and Sharmell talk to TBP. They agree for The Beautiful People to watch Sharmell's back at Final Resolution in return for getting to use Booker's locker room.

Match #4: Christy Hemme vs. Raisha Saed w/ The Kongtourage
This sucked because Christy is a terrible wrestler, and she wins.
1/4*

Kong gets in to kill, but Christy bails out.

In a pretape, Tenay interviews AJ. He puts over Rhino as a great guy to have in the locker room and says he's helped his career a lot. BY TRYING TO KILL HIM IN ELEVATION X. He says he wasn't kicked out of his house, he was the one that left, because his dad was a drunk, and tells Sting not to ever bring it up again.

In the back, Lauren talks to Sting nad Nash. Nash says AJ is a spoiled brat, and he couldn't even respect his dad. Sting says to drop it, and Nash shrugs and leaves.

In the back, JB interviews Shelley. He says with $25,000 he can buy AJ a personality, Joe a singlet, and Mick Foley a new wardrobe. Or he can keep it all for himself, which sounds like the best plan to him.

WHOISSUICIDE.COM

Match #5: Alex Shelley vs. Rhino vs. Sheik Abdul Bashir [Turkey Bowl Finals]
This is not great. Shelley vs. Rhino is good, but Rhino vs. Bashir is really horrible. Rhino ends up Goring Shelley to get the win. :(
**

Mick Foley comes out with a novelty check for Rhino, and he leaves. He hands Shelley the suit and has to threaten to fire him to get him to wear the suit.

Posted Image

Posted Image

He gives Foley the finger, so Foley hits him with a Butterfly DDT.

SUICIDE IS COMING.

AJ, Joe, and Rhino come out, and AJ says it's decision time. The MEM comes out and Angle says AJ is another smug punk who's never beaten anyone who matters. Except, you know, when he beat Angle twice not even 4 months ago. Whatever. Why isn't AJ saying any of this? Team 3D comes out in suits and sunglasses and the MEM applauds. Bubba gets on the mic and he says both sides have points, but they got to start thinking about their legacy. He says they want to be remembered with The Road Warriors and Steiners as the greatest tag teams that ever were. Bubba then says that the Frontline has guts and balls, and they respect the hell out of that, and then they say if loving TNA is wrong, they don't want to be right, and they attack MEM! They put up a table and set angle for the 3D, but Sting pulls Kurt out and the MEM bails out.


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