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Simon Watches ECW - 1995
Topic Started: Mar 5 2013, 02:35 PM (5,999 Views)
Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, Since 4/15/1995
ECW Television Champion: Eddie Guerrero, Since 7/28/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: Raven/Stevie Richards, Since 6/30/1995

ECW Hardcore TV
August 15th, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


We're back to Arena shows, now with stuff from Wrestlepalooza on August 5th.

A recap airs of Arena events. Sandman caned Mikey out of consciousness and the referee made him stop under threat of being stripped of the title. Woman then made him stop, and Mikey was taken to the back. Sandman refused to leave the ring and Public Enemy tried to come out for their match. He attacked them, and it started a brawl. The Gangstas attacked PE, and won the Stretcher Match when The Sandman interfered. Mikey came out and caned Sandman in revenge.

On 8/26 in the Arena, it will be Sandman/Gangstas vs. Mikey/PE.

At ringside, Joey Styles brings out Raven, Stevie Richards, & Beulah. Stevie says there's so much going on tonight, but he wants to talk about something really important. LOOK AT HIS NEW WINGER SHIRT! HIS GIRLFRIEND GOT IT FOR ME! Raven asks where this is going, and Stevie officially names her Francine, and says she needs TV time. They go over to him and she calls Stevie "sweet cheeks". Francine says to get that slut out of the shot, and Beulah comes over. CATFIGHT YEAH! They agree to a match, but it's just them rolling around in the ring before it's broken up.

Match #1: Hack Myers vs. JT Smith
This happens for 6 minutes. Not bad, not bad at all. JT is coming back from injury and tries to be tough with SHAH. JT has some really great punches, and strikes me as a potential ECW version of Jay Lethal. I know it's not true, but he's a skilled young black guy with a lot of fire. Of course, ECW lacks the stacked roster Jay Lethal had the advantage of coming up during. Aaaand the comparison leaves as JT fucks up a dive and faceplants on the concrete to a "YOU FUCKED UP!" chant. AND OH MOTHERFUCKER, THAT FAT FUCK VAL PUCCIO COMES OUT TO SPLASH HACK. WHY IS THIS A FEUD?! FUCK. JT then hits a Flying Elbow for the win.
**

In the back, Raven, Stevie, Beulah, and the Dudleys stand by in a dumpster and Dudley Dudley throws trash as Big Dick has him on a leash. Raven says faith, hope, and charity are the cornerstones of a civilized society. However, things are a little different in his world. In his world, child abuse runs rampant, the dysfunctionality of the nuclear family, war, famine, poverty. So it is written, and so it shall come to pass. Stevie repeats what he said and says they won the titles and he got the hottest groupie there is. Beulah gets mad and he asks if she's jealous until Raven yells at him. Dudley Dudley says there's a lot of Dudleys where they come from, and the Pitbulls aren't that tough. He throws more trash and Raven says to quote the Raven, nevermore.

Back in the Arena, Hack and Val Puccio have a terrible brawl.

Joey Styles brings out Tommy Dreamer and The Pitbulls for an interview. Tommy says Luna can't make it because of that hurricane, but he never disappoints the ECW fans, and brings out his friend, the man who's been hardcore as long as he's been alive, Cactus Jack, as their 4th partner for the night! Cactus says as far as he's concerned, he's here to help Tommy Dreamer tonight, and says he's going to sum up the competition. He finds Dudley Dudley repetitive, and he'll unload on that Big Dick tonight, and when there's a Big Dick around, kneeling before it will be Stevie Richards! He says their Pitbulls are salivating to get at Stevie, and it brings him to Raven. As hard as he's tried and searched his heart to find hatred for him, he can't. He looks at Raven and hears that old Bob Dylan song about seeing the real you and last, and this is the real him. He kind of digs his vibes, the Pearl Jam, the sexy girl. It might not make him too popular, but he digs the guy. Tommy shakes his head and is confused, and Cactus says BANG BANG!

Match #2: Cactus Jack/Tommy Dreamer/The Pitbulls vs. Raven/Stevie Richards/Big Dick Dudley/Dudley Dudley w/ Beulah McGillicutty
This is clipped a lot, and Raven keeps slapping Cactus to enrage him. Match isn't that great, and it's more about the angle. What's shown is a fun brawl. Tommy hits Raven with a Piledriver on the chair after the secondary teams have fought away, BUT CACTUS KICKS HIM AND HITS DREAMER WITH THE DOUBLE ARM DDT! CACTUS PUTS RAVEN ON TOP AND HE BEATS TOMMY AGAIN!
**

Cactus helps Raven to the back.

In the back, Cactus Jack is found sitting in the bowels of the ECW Arena. He says he was two hours late to a building he's been in dozens of times before because he couldn't remember the way. He says to think about that for a while, because when he thinks about the loss of physical and mental functions in his life, it hurts. When Vader dropped him on his head, it hurt. When his ear was torn off the side of his head, it hurt. When Terry Funk put a flaming brand into his flesh, it hurt. When Shane Douglas, a man he called friend for the last dozen years, stabbed him in the eye, it hurt. He says nobody understands that. The ECW fans get off on pain, but they don't understand it. One man does, and that's Raven. So how can he turn his back when he has a higher purpose? When he understands his pain? When he understands the thoughts in his head? He says he's prepared to live with his actions. Tommy considers him the original hardcore wrestler, but he can't bear that cross, he's sorry. For Mikey Whipwreck, who looks up to him, he's sorry. And for anybody who stands in the way of that higher purpose, they have to deal with them. And for that, he's truly sorry. And who knows. He might have to kill them. Great promo, but sort of just a thing he did before finding himself with the anti-hardcore ones.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, Since 4/15/1995
ECW Television Champion: Eddie Guerrero, Since 7/28/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: Raven/Stevie Richards, Since 6/30/1995

ECW Hardcore TV
August 22nd, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


A recap of recent events in all the big feuds airs, set to "Smells Like Teen Spirit".

THIS SATURDAY NIGHT: EDDIE VS. DEAN FOR THE TV TITLE IN A BEST OF THREE FALLS MATCH!

2 Cold Scorpio and Dean Malenko are waiting for a third partner in the ring, since Benoit's visa still isn't happening. Raven comes out and he says he understands the anguish that Scorpio's people have felt all these years, so he delivers unto him Cactus Jack!

Match #1: Cactus Jack/Dean Malenko/2 Cold Scorpio vs. Eddie Guerrero/The Steiner Brothers w/ Taz
I remember this being so much better than it was. Really well laid out movefest. Some moments of sloppiness due to miscommunication. More of a Japanese structure, but they still didn't do a lot with that. More of a dream match where they showed off all the pairings and had some cool stuff, but they didn't really DO a whole lot to make anything matter. Eddie was a pretty awesome FIP, and the finishing run ruled, but that was only like half the match. Dean gets a roll up on Eddie to win going into their final match.
***

The Sandman/PE/Gangstas/Mikey angle that was recapped last week is now shown in full. Delightful.
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Big Evil
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On TBS. Very Funny.

Fucking up moves was JT Smith's gimmick
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

I know?

Also, 2 Cold Scorpio won the belt from Eddie on 8/25, since Eddie and Dean got signed to WCW, and this would be their last weekend in ECW.

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, Since 4/15/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: Raven/Stevie Richards, Since 6/30/1995

ECW Hardcore TV
August 30th, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


Highlights air of the ECW careers of Dean Malenko and Eddie Guerrero.

Joey Styles is in the ring and brings out the NEW ECW Television Champion, 2 Cold Scorpio! He congratulates him on the threepeat, and talks about him injuring Taz's neck. He says Taz is looking for him, and Scorpio ignores him and says this is his belt now. He says if Taz wants some, he can get some. Joey asks for his prediction on the 2 of 3 falls match, and he says his prediction is WHO CARES? Because he's the champ.

ECW ARENA - SEPTEMBER 16TH:
-REY MISTERIO JR. VS. PSICOSIS!
-RAVEN/STEVIE VS. THE PITBULLS FOR THE BELTS IN A DOUBLE DOG COLLAR MATCH
-I HAVE THIS SHOW, SO IT WILL BE REVIEWED IN FULL! YEAH!

Match #1: Eddie Guerrero vs. Dean Malenko [Best of Three Falls]
This is legendary and the match everyone sees when exploring old Eddie and Dean. Their first match at Hostile City Showdown is probably their best match, but that's not an insult to this. It's great, that's undeniable with these two. But it feels like an exhibition, more than any other match of theirs. Tons and tons of cool shit. In fact, more cool shit than any of their other matches, but it lacks the kind of focus of their best match, which had focus, great storytelling, and tons of cool shit. They tease stuff with Dean going back to the midsection, and have some nice minor moments like both men becoming frustrated and cheating, but they're just minor things. Eddie gets the first fall with a schoolboy. Dean then gets mad at this in classic Three Falls Format, and works the back a little bit, and wins the second fall with the Texas Cloverleaf. Finishing run of course pretty much ignores this, and they do lots of cool shit once again. Goes to a double pin off a Bridging O'Connor Roll, and the match ends in a draw. I liked the matwork WAY more than the cool shit, but I'm at the point where that's the only new thing they're doing, so it'll be more interesting. This is a solid second best match of theirs in ECW after the first one.
***1/2

They both give their farewell speeches, and that is that. There are infinitely worse ways to spend a TV show than on this match.
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Big Evil
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On TBS. Very Funny.

The way you wrote it, didn't seem like you knew, you smug piece of shit.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, Since 4/15/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: Raven/Stevie Richards, Since 6/30/1995

ECW Hardcore TV
September 5th, 1995
Philadelphia, PA

Match #1: Hack Myers vs. JT Smith w/ Val Puccio

This fucking feud. I hate it. This match isn't awful. Hot crowd helps it, and I enjoy JT's heel stuff. Val sits ringside eating a cannoli the entire time. Fuck him. JT gets thrown into Val on the floor and he is counted out when they argue. That was like 3 minutes, so whatever.
3/4*

They beat down Hack post-match and JT stuffs the cannoli down his throat. Sup FBI formation?

Clips air from a Paul/Alfonso seg with poor sound quality. Joey can be heard though, and he says Bill is calling out 911 and Bill bans the Chokeslam, and Bill KOs Paul with the cell phone and Gordon and Fonzie have another HORRIBLE fight. He hits Tod Gordon with the phone too.

Clips air from a house show in Jim Thorpe, PA. No real matches are shown, but they spend a lot of time on this. Most notable is 2 Cold Scorpio winning the TV Title back from Eddie Guerrero.

Match #2: Raven/Stevie Richards [c] w/ Beulah McGillicutty vs. The Pitbulls [ECW Tag Team Championship]
This is much better than the house show match. Still not great, since the Pitbulls are limited, but they try much harder in the Arena. Stevie is terrified of them and refuses to get in, so Raven is mauled early on, and that's fun. Raven gets mad and forces a tag and throws Stevie to The Pitbulls. He puts on an awesome bumping showcase, AND THE PITBULLS DO A STANDING DOOMSDAY DEVICE OVER THE TOP!? JEEEEEEEEEEEESUS STEVIE IS DEAD. Raven gets in to save the belts, but also dies on stuff. They finally try to end it with the Superbomb on Raven, BUT BEULAH SLAPS #2 TO BREAK THE COVER. SHIT. They try it on her, but Raven is RIGHT BACK UP. FUCK THAT. They do more great false finishes and The Dudleys get involved too. There's a perfect moment after Raven sneaks in the Evenflow where it should have ended, but #2 kicks out. Right after, Big Dick Dudley pulls him out and drops him throat-first on the railing, rolls him in, and Stevie covers to win. Aside from that and the ridiculous infuriating no-selling, this was really really great. And it being ECW, you give them effort points sometimes, so whatever.
***

NEVERMIND THAT, BECAUSE CACTUS JACK TALKS!

"I guess the last you left Cactus Jack, you described it as a catatonic state. And certainly there's been a lot of questions from my actions, and I understand. But you never met Uncle Willy.

And at this point, Tommy Dreamer, he knows he's looking at his arm, entirely taped up, and wondering what happened. This is what happened (Cactus holds up a Japanese magazine showing him in an explosion death match). That's what happened, but it's really not that bad. The doctors have told him there'll be some discoloration with a second degree burn, but really, no permanent scarring. Which is more than he can say for his opponent, Terry Funk. In a hospital and an ambulance, screaming and crying with his third-degree burns. And it didn't escape me that yes, the man who walked into the ECW Arena with a flaming branding iron and sizzled his name across my chest, is the man who walked away with permanent scars. And that match signified to me that I am in Japan, the King of the Deathmatch, which I guess in ECW, that makes me King of the Hardcores.

My uncle Willy knew all about Japan. See, Tommy Dreamer, you never met my Uncle Willy. And neither did I. See, he's been dead for 50 years, but I always felt like I knew him because there was a big picture of my uncle Willy at 18 years old ready to save the world in the hallway of my home. And every day, he'd see his dad almost get down and genuflect in front of that picture, almost like you used to do in front of my picture, Tommy Dreamer. Because Uncle Willy was a hero, because Uncle Willy was on the boat that brought the bomb over to Japan to save the good guys. And what happened to the boat after they delivered that bomb is a well known story, and although they never saw or found Uncle Willy's body, they've all got a pretty good idea what happened."

He starts humming the Jaws theme.

"But we rest assured that my Uncle Willy died a hero. That is until he made his way to Japan, to Hiroshima, and saw generations later pictures with people burning down their arms. Their flash hanging off of their bones. LET'S HEAR IT FOR THE BOMBING OF INNOCENT CHILDREN! USA! USA! USA! LET'S HEAR IT FOR THE BOMBING OF HELPLESS WOMEN! WILLY! WILLY! All his life, he saw people whose idea was suffering was to kick back until the next welfare check came in, and they said they bombed those bastards. THEY WERE HUMAN BEINGS, YOU SONS OF BITCHES. And you killed them. And I went back to my dad and he said he hoped Uncle Willy died a painful death. He hoped they ate him whole, that they swallowed his spine, if he even had one. And for the first time, his dad hit him, and told him to take a look at himself. To look at the scars and the burns and the missing body parts, and find out that the same thing that makes those Japanese wrestlers so tough is the same thing that made them have to sacrifice 130,000 human lives. Because they keep going and going and going, and the only way to save millions of more lives was by a show of force. And I said, "Dad, by whose authority do you believe those words you just spoke?" And he said the government of the United States. And I believed his words.

So it's very simple, Tommy Dreamer. If we can sacrifice 160,000 human lives in the fulfillment of a higher purpose, THEN THE DDT OF YOUR HEARD ON THE MAT IS PRETTY DAMN INSIGNIFICANT NEWS. AND IF YOU CAN BELIEVE AND TRUST A GOVERNMENT THAT MUTILATES BABIES...

...then I outta get the benefit of the doubt. Because I and Raven have a higher purpose, and that thought brings him pride. Bang bang."

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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, Since 4/15/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: Raven/Stevie Richards, Since 6/30/1995

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ECW Gangstas Paradise
September 16th, 1995
Philadelphia, PA

Match #1: Bull Pain vs. The Broad Street Bully

BULL PAIN! FUCK YEAH! This is not good at all. Super sloppy power brawl, where like 85% of stuff is either botched or falls into the category of aimless clubbering. Bull wins with a cool idea for a move but kind of shoddy execution in what's best described as a Slingshot Gourdbuster.
*

Match #2: Dudley Dudley/Dances With Dudley w/ Big Dick Dudley & Chubby Dudley vs. Don E. Allen/Chad Austin

Terrible terrible squash. The Dudleys are hardly trained it seems. Dances is a fat white guy who keeps doing tomahawk chops. I miss Shayne Hawke. He was funny. Dudley Dudley hits a horrible splash off the top to win. ECW hates the first half of shows.
1/2*

Before his match, JT Smith asks all his paisanos in Philadelphia to cheer for him after this piece of shit.

Match #3: JT Smith vs. Hack Myers
JT Smith has some Rene Dupree blatant cock bulge revealing tights on, so that's awful. This wasn't good, but it was entertaining, and after those two piles of shit, I'll gladly take that. JT fucks up the Taker Dive in hilarious faction. They do some more shit in the ring and JT's bumping is super great, and JT tries a Moonsault, BUT FUCKS IT UP AND FALLS TO THE FLOOR THROUGH A TABLE! YEAH! He is counted out on account of being dead.
*3/4

Biggie says there was some Eliminators video package and angle with Taz's return, but that doesn't exist on my copy, so we go right to the match.

Match #4: Taz/The Steiner Brothers vs. Jason/The Eliminators w/ 2 Cold Scorpio
This is alright. It's clipped entirely to shit because ECW Home Video is literally the fucking worst, but what's there looks good. Scorpio keeps interfering against Taz. This is clipped down to four minutes, but they can fucking air the seven minutes of that opening match in full? Fuck this company. Taz beats Jason bloody, but Scorpio kicks Taz in the injured neck and rolls Jason on top for the pin.
*1/2

Raven comes out for the Tag Title match with only Beulah in his corner and no Stevie Richards. Joey Styles says he saw Stevie in the back trying to get anybody to take his place for this match. Also it's not just a Double Dog Collar match now as The Pitbulls' careers on the line. Cool. The Pitbulls come out and Beulah says Stevie broke his arm last night and this is unfair, so she asks to make it 2 of 3 falls. It is agreed upon.

Match #5: Raven/Stevie Richards [c] w/ Beulah McGillicutty vs. The Pitbulls [ECW Tag Team Championship - Best of Three Falls Double Dog Collar Match - Titles vs. Pitbulls' Career As a Team]
As #2 and Raven have a brawl that sort of just happens, #1 goes to the back and comes back out with a perfectly healthy Stevie attached to the other chain. Raven then gets a table up in the ring and quickly hits a Piledriver through it on #2 to go up 1-0. That felt like it jumped ahead several minutes. #2 comes back like it's nothing though, because LOLECW. They bring Stevie in and a Superbomb through a table evens it up. That felt REALLY REALLY rushed. They finally slow it down somewhat with a crowd brawl and it starts to feel like a real match. The Dudleys get involved and they help Raven and Stevie hit Stereo Superbombs on The Pitbulls, BUT LOLECW LOLSELLING BECAUSE THEY GET DIRECTLY UP, NOT EVEN REGISTERING IT. They then hit Stereo Double DDTs and kill the Dudleys with Superbombs too. Raven survives a Superbomb, and they blatantly kill time, AND RAVEN USES AN ETHER RAG ON #2! AMAZING! Joey tries to ruin it with a call of TAKE THAT CRAP TO SMOKEY MOUNTAIN. He puts #2 on one table stacked on another, AND PUTS HIM THROUGH BOTH TABLES! Raven frees #2 from the collar, and he's taken to the back as he's injured. Beulah gets involved, and Francine runs out to fight her. Joey yells that her and Stevie broke up? I guess it happened on the 8/26 show, but it hasn't been on TV yet. Really should have aired that before this, but again, ECW. AND RAVEN EVENFLOWS FRANCINE. AND TOMMY DREAMER RUNS OUT AND ATTACHES HIMSELF TO RAVEN! YEAH! HE DDTS RAVEN, AND TOMMY PINS RAVEN! HOLY SHIT YEAH! Bill Alfonso comes out AND SAYS IT DOESN'T COUNT BECAUSE HE WASN'T LEGALLY IN THIS MATCH! Tod Gordon comes out and says it counts, and they have a horrible fight again, and Big Dick Dudley comes out when Tommy tries to DDT Bill Alfonso, AND CHOKESLAMS TOMMY! BUT THAT'S ILLEGAL. Alfonso says it's legal for one night and says to do it again, AND 911 COMES OUT. 911 FINALLY CHOKESLAMS ALFONSO! PITBULL #2 COMES BACK OUT, AND TOMMY AND #2 PUT RAVEN UP FOR THE SUPERBOMB, AND PUT STEVIE UP TOO! DOUBLE SUPERBOMB AND THE PITBULLS WIN THE TITLES! AWESOME.

This wasn't really good at all. They skipped laying groundwork and rushed through the first two falls, and as a result, all the insanity at the end kind of came off flat because it's clearly all they cared about doing. With them actually spending time on the first two falls, this would actually be a classic match, at least for ECW. But they didn't, and it was a huge mess until the final minutes. And even then, it was a completely overbooked mess, and more of a series of huge payoffs to summer angles disguised as a match.

That being said, the last 5 minutes was awesome and worth seeing, even if the actual match was a gigantic clusterfuck mess.
**1/2

Match #6: Rey Misterio Jr. vs. Psicosis

Awesome spotfest, as these two did everywhere at this time. It's more of an exhibition than matches they'd have later, but at this point, they figured this would be just a touring thing, so it makes sense that they'd want to just do as much cool shit as possible in the ten minutes they had. Crowd started off making fun of their gear, and by the end they were super into it, which is always great to watch. Rey wins with a Springboard Frankensteiner.
***

In the back, Steve Austin makes his debut with the Hulk Hogan imitation promo. He had to do the vitamins and training and do what it takes in the ECW because the Stevester's here to run wild on the ECW with the Steveamania. HE'S NOT GONNA DO THIS SHIT ANYWHERE, NOT EVEN IN ECW, BECAUSE THERE'S NO WAY THIS LAME ASS SHIT IS GONNA GET THE JOB DONE ANYWHERE.

In a hilarious character bit, PE has influenced Mikey to try and steal the ring announcer's wallet during their entrance.

Match #7: Mikey Whipwreck/Public Enemy vs. The Sandman/New Jack/2 Cold Scorpio w/ Woman [Steel Cage Match]
Scorp filling in for Mustafa adds a lot to this. PE still drags it down and holds it back, but whatever. Scorp is filling in as Sandman's best friend since PE injured Mustafa in the Stretcher Match in August. The heels are all great, and Mikey is a wonderful underdog. PE is the worst. This is clearly pin or submission only, since Grunge and New Jack brawled into the crowd. There's a huge table bump near the end, but otherwise, this sort of just goes on a while before the cool ending. MIKEY HITS A FRANKENSTEINER TO SANDMAN OFF THE TOP OF THE CAGE! MIKEY CLIMBS BACK UP THE CAGE AND HITS A FLYING SPLASH ONTO SANDMAN FOR THE WIN! AWESOME!
**1/4

Woman locks the cage shut and throws Sandman the cane. He goes wild on Mikey with it and he then jams the cane in between the door and corner to block entry. He goes up top, AND HITS THE ROLLING ROCK OFF THE CAGE ONTO MIKEY! PE breaks in, and Sandman climbs out. Oh it's cool though, because Mikey gets back up to celebrate with Public Enemy. Fuck everything.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, Since 4/15/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: The Pitbulls, Since 9/16/1995

I'm an idiot and forgot to review 9/12 before the last show, so all these matches are from the 8/26 show.

ECW Hardcore TV
September 12th, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


A video of Pitbulls vs. Raven/Stevie airs, set to "Hey Man, Nice Shot" by Filter. Another cool ECW video.

The Pitbulls cut a promo for the Double Dog Collar match, but it's already happened, so whatever.

CLUB ECW IS BACK. JOIN IT.

In the back, Cactus Jack cuts a promo and it's the high point of any show ECW can run at this point for me to type that. He says Tommy Dreamer is ignorant, he's an ignorant little boy. Ignorant and selfish, and he doesn't know what bothers him more. He tries to say Cactus Jack is the original hardcore wrestler, and it shows his ignorance, BECAUSE HE'S NOT EVEN CLOSE. He asks what the name Ray Stevens means to him, and says it doesn't mean a lot to the general public because he was one of the original hardcore wrestler. Where is he now? He's in need of a heart transplant because the years of boozing, smoking, and red meat have clogged his arteries to the point where his body is barely functioning. But he can't get it because he doesn't have the money. Harley Race has been a millionaire several times over and his body lies broken and battered. Why? Because he was a hardcore wrestler. HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE DIALED UP THE DYNAMITE KID AND SAID, "KID! I LOVED YOUR DIVES OFF THE TOP TO THE CONCRETE FLOOR! SORRY TO HEAR THAT YOU DON'T HAVE A POT TO PISS IN! Or a window to throw it out, but thanks for the memories." He says the problem with being hardcore is by the very nature of the name, they give of themselves, of their bodies, their souls, and their hearts. And for each of them that gives, there's bloodthirsty fans out there only willing to take. He asks how many of them shed a tear for Eddie Gilbert, and if they did, how many were just sorry that they'd never see Eddie showered in blood anymore. He tells him to get off the trip and answer his phone calls, and says Raven's given him an out. He has the perfect excuse to just walk away, and Raven is allowing him to do that to him. To do what he did for him in the ECW Arena and DDT him proves how much love he really has in his heart, because you've gotta love somebody a lot to do that. He doesn't mean to yell or get upset, because he likes him and wants the best for him. He tells him not to take this on a public forum and to answer his call, because he who flees and runs away lives to fight another day.

Match #1: Tommy Dreamer vs. Dudley Dudley w/ Big Dick Dudley
This is an acceptable Tommy showcase. Most notable thing is that it's Tommy finally ditching the trunks and just wearing pants and a shirt. Tommy wins with a Superplex.
*3/4

Highlights again air of the 8/25 Jim Thrope show, really pushing to get attendance up for non-Arena shows.

In the back, Joey Styles interviews Taz. He says he needs no hype or music video or hoopla, and he just gets in the ring and does his job, and he's going to kick Scorpio's ass. Of course, "Sad! But True!" plays in the background, so lol on that no music.

Match #2: The Steiner Brothers w/ Taz vs. Chris Benoit/2 Cold Scorpio
This is Benoit's actual final ECW match, and it's pretty great. Matwork with the Steiners and Benoit is fucking beautiful and aggressive. This is a Steiner move-fest, but Benoit and Scorpio are so good at putting those together that it comes off a lot more naturally than the six man did. The match is clipped to some extent, but still gets 10 minutes aired, so it's great. Nice sort of psychology where The Steiners can handle Benoit, since he wrestles like them, but have more trouble adjusting to dealing with Scorp. Big finishing run, and Benoit is beat after THE GODDAMN DOOMSDAY DDT. JESUS, NO WONDER HIS BRAIN WAS USELESS.
***1/4
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, Since 4/15/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: The Pitbulls, Since 9/16/1995

ECW Hamcore TV
Setember 19th, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


In the back, Cactus Jack talks, and it's fucking "Cane Dewey". Reading it isn't the same as watching it. Fucking watch it. It's the best promo of Mick Foley's career, and that says a lot since he's at worst a top 5 promo of all time. I can't offhand think of 5 better individual promos than "Cane Dewey" either. In possibly the greatest promo year anyone will ever have, this is the crown jewel. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=28KH9YiJ9DI

In the back, Tommy Dreamer cuts a promo sitting down in the staircase. He says he's sorry about Uncle Willy, but ECW is politically incorrect and damn proud of it. He says Cactus is lying to the people and he doesn't call him. He says he's forgot what got him here. His two houses, his wife, his two kids, all the result of being hardcore. Hardcore isn't chairs and weapons, it's a whole style of going out and giving it 100%, and if he doesn't think the fans care, they say thanks every time they chant "ECW". He says he won't let him disgrace that, and he knows not all of them have worked on PPV or had that exposure, but they deserve it. He then proves himself wrong by citing Public Enemy as deserving it. FUCK YOU. OF ALL THE GOOD GUYS HERE, YOU CHOOSE THE PUBLIC FUCKING ENEMY? CACTUS WAS RIGHT. He says everybody has a dark side, and he doesn't want to heed his, and says any chance he get, he's coming after Raven, and he might not change Cactus' mind, but he'll die trying.

An awesome Raven/Dreamer video airs, set to "I Don't Know Anything" by Mad Season.

A recap of the Raven & Stevie/Pitbulls feud airs.

They then air the Double Dog Collar match in full to end the show.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, Since 4/15/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: The Pitbulls, Since 9/16/1995

ECW Hardcore TV
September 26th, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


The last fall of the Double Dog Collar match airs again to open the show.

OCTOBER 7TH, 1995 - ECW ARENA - EVEN THOUGH I DON'T HAVE IT:
-PITBULLS VS. RAVEN/STEVIE MATCH WITH ALFONSO AND GORDON AS DUAL REFEREES
-TAZ VS. JASON

JT Smith vs. Hack Myers is shown.

In the back, The Steiners and Taz cut a promo, and Scott Steiner hypes Taz up and CUTS THE FIRST SCOTT STEINER PROMO. He says to forgot about being hurt and to kick his ass and send Jason with those other FEMININE WRESTLERS LIKE JOHNNY B. BADD, WHO WEARS MAKEUP, AND GOLDUST, THAT'S A GOOD ONE, AND SHAWN MICHAELS, AND THEY CAN WRESTLE FOR THE INTERGENDERCONTINENTAL TITLE CHAMPIONSHIP AND WRESTLE WOMEN. KICK HIS ASS. Taz says this has been hard and he thanks them for being there for him, and come October 7th, and he's going to make Jason quit.

Rey vs. Psicosis is shown.

In the back, PE and The Gangstas have a brawl in the locker room and it is broken up.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, Since 4/15/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: The Pitbulls, Since 9/16/1995

ECW Hardcore TV
October 3rd, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


In the back, Beulah announces that she'll be having a new segment where she answers fan mail, and it's called Beulah's Box. She says her box is always open for you. Hngh.

Joey says in addition to shit from the last Arena show, they'll have Mikey vs. Sandman from Middletown, NY.

The six man cage match is shown.

A really great ad for Gangatas Paradise on VHS airs, set obviously to "Gangatas Paradise".

A video airs of the PE/Gangstas feud.

In the back, Tommy Dreamer cuts a promo with some new interviewer named Lance Wright. He says Tommy Dreamer is just a regular guy, but they keep pushing him. Scorpio hurt his friend's neck and he had his TV Title, but like everything in his life, it was taken away by Raven and Cactus Jack. He has to hear about Cactus giving the best interviews of his life (wtf?), but he wants sympathy, and he won't get it. He says Cactus wants his soul, but he wants his life. He says bang bang, and shoves the finger gun down Wright's mouth.

Before the main event, Steve Austin comes out, and has the epic "Jesus Christ Superstar" theme. Austin says this place is a complete shithole and he's fucking horrified to be here. He says WCW wouldn't take a shit in this building, let alone book a god damned wrestling match here. The fact of the matter is he appreciates the fact that Sandman had to kick somebody's ass to get that belt, and he couldn't get shit in Atlanta because he didn't work the right way. Sandman gets in his face and Austin says he didn't come down to start anything with him, and his name's not Hogan, so he can whip his fucking ass, and wishes him good luck. Sandman gets on the mic. He says any time, anywhere, he's the extreme Heavyweight Champion, and if he wants it, go on and get it. Austin then goes to Mikey and pats him on the cheek. He says he's a good kid and wishes him luck, but he's not gonna shake his hand, because he doesn't belong in the same ring or the same building as Steve Austin. But he's a good kid. Austin is already the best pure heel promo in ECW. Cactus is doing groundbreaking shit, but it's hard to call them heel promos.

Match #1: The Sandman [c] w/ Woman vs. Mikey Whipwreck [ECW World Heavyweight Championship]
This is from 9/23 in Middletown, NY, and unfortunately, only some 3-4 minutes air. It's awesome, really fucking good, but it's only a few minutes. They use a ladder and Mikey has some amazing nearfalls, before Woman hits him with a cane on the top rope, and Sandman rolls his head on top to win.
*3/4

In the back, Cactus Jack talks! YES! He says he'd like to apologize for his behavior and he feels a little stupid for how he acted. He says he gets a little emotional when he talks about wrestling because it's been his livelihood for the last 10 years, and has enabled him to live out his childhood dream. And for him to badmouth the wrestlers here, he's sorry. But to understand his head, you have to understand where he came from and what his goals were. Back in 1985, there was a program on 20/20 that challenged the industry and sort of portrayed it in a negative light. And if Tommy's listening, he should understand that he was the world's biggest wrestling fan and to see people running down a business that he loved and held dear, to see his friends laughing at him? And that night he went to bed, not with visions of sugarplums dancing through his head, but with visions of broken bones and battered bodies and bloody corpses saying to himself, if it's the last thing he does, if he has to hold himself up for a human sacrifice, the world will respect professional wrestling. And that dream came through, yes, he's sacrificed himself for the last ten years, and left the better parts of his past lying on concrete floors in Africa to Asia to South America to right in the middle of the ECW Arena. And what's it really done? Where have we really come to? Lying in a hospital bed in Munich, Germany, watching his ear being thrown into a garbage can, not being being able to take it home with him, because he doesn't know the German word for formaldehyde, and having a nurse look at that piece of his body and saying, "It's all a big joke." EXCUSE HIM, HE DIDN'T KNOW THAT YOU OPEN THE LUNGS OF A SMOKER AND SAY, "MY GOLLY, I THOUGHT SMOKING WAS SUPPOSED TO BE GOOD FOR YOU!" DO YOU OPEN UP TERRY FUNK'S NON-FUNCTIONING LIVER AND SAY, "WOW, I DIDN'T KNOW FOUR DECADES OF HEAVY DRINKING TOOK THIS KIND OF TOLL!"? So if they show that respect to them, what made him any different? Because he was a wrestler, and professional wrestling will never be respected. No matter how many teeth he loses, no matter how many ears he loses, no matter how many brain cells have to die. So it comes to a point where it's just not worth it, and Tommy Dreamer has to look realistically at wrestling as a way to make a living. And as long as it's strictly business, he might as well be cuddled in the arms of World Championship Wrestling, BECAUSE ECW FANS WILL BE THE DEATH OF HIM. They realize and they were smarter than any of them, that they ruled ECW wrestling, not them. Tommy came back from AJPW with his trunks and boots, and said "By golly, I'm gonna wrestle!" Did Giant Baba hand you a dozen eggs and say, "Tommy, go hit these on Jumbo Tsuruta's head!?" He says Tommy is becoming a fool, and he can't take it, because he's got a moral obligation. When he surveys the wasteland that is wrestling? He says Tommy has to understand that he is but a failed experiment in human sociology and he can accept that, but never in his sickest dreams could he imagine that there'd be others, taking dives on concrete floors, committing human suicide, ON HIS BEHALF. LIKE HE'S THE PATRON SAINT OF THE SICK SONS OF BITCHES?! Is that all he stands for? To sit in an arena where JT Smith lands headfirst on the concrete to hear fans yell "You Fucked Up!"? WELL FUCK YOU. WHO THE HELL DO THEY THINK THEY ARE? THEY'RE THE WORLD'S BIGGEST PUPPET SHOW, AND HE'LL BE DAMNED IF THEY SIT IN THAT ARENA AND CALL HIS MATCH. 1-2-3 JUMP! 1-2-3 JUMP! Not him. He's nobody's stooge, and if Tommy had a little bit of pride or common sense, he'd realize that those people don't love him, they laugh at him. He took the worst beatings of all time, and they laughed at him, until six months ago, he put his arm around him and said, "He's hardcore. He's hardcore." And for that, he deserves to die a painful death, because he feels responsible. AND HE GOES TO BED AT NIGHT AND HE'S NOT SURE WHERE HE'S GOING TO SPEND HIS ETERNITY. And Tommy...he's his salvation. Because by delivering him to a better organization where he can be appreciated, loved, and held with the littlest amount of respect in the Turner family, then maybe there's a chance for him too. So please, for his sake, he asks Tommy to think it over. A yes to Cactus Jack would mean a great deal to him, and a no, he'd have to take that as him putting a big OK stamp on HIS ETERNAL DAMNATION. YOU LITTLE SELFISH SHIT, DON'T MAKE HIM HURT YOU, BECAUSE HE CAN. AND AS GOD AS HIS WITNESS, IT WON'T BE IN FRONT OF THOSE SCUMBAGS AT THE ECW ARENA, IT'LL JUST BE THE TWO OF THEM. And he won't know when it's coming or where, so unless he wishes to damn him to the depths of Hell, he asks Tommy to answer his call. To groom that mustache, to put on those suspenders, and to call Uncle Eric, and say "Count me in." Because not only would be doing himself a big favor, not only would be be helping his life...he'd be saving his. HE'D BE SAVING HIS.

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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, Since 4/15/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: Public Enemy, Since 10/7/1995

ECW Hardcore TV
October 10th, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


AND HEY WHAT'S UP, WE FOLLOW THAT G.O.A.T. LEVEL PROMO WITH ANOTHER?!

Steve Austin talks and tells a story. A couple weeks ago, when Eric Bischoff told his secretary to tell her secretary to leave a message on his answering machine for me to call Eric Bischoff and then he called Eric Bischoff and he proceeded to fire him over the phone, he felt a big cloud was lifted off his career. Because gone were the days when he’d go up to someone and say “hey, what about me and Sting? We got this big thing going. How ‘bout the cage?” and someone says “no baby, thath for thomebody elthe. We jutht gonna keep you right where you at right now.” Then he said “well what about me and Savage? I got this great idea. He comes in, he’s got the Slim Jim deal, well hell, I got --” and they'd say “No Thteve. Thath for thomebody elthe, baby.” Then he'd go “I got this great idea. I could do it with Hulk Hogan. I’m gonna be the Steve-a-maniac and we’re gonna take this thing all the way! Because Hulk Hogan, Hulkamania was the biggest thing to ever come down the wrestling pike!” And they said “No, that’s not for you brother. You can’t do that. We’re gonna keep you right where you are.” He said “how about me and Brian get back together? The Hollywood Blondes! It was the best tag team to come along in ten years!” and they say “no Steve, we need you in a singles role man. We need you to do this. We’re gonna put the US title on you and then we’re gonna take you here, and then you’re the number one contender so then you get this world title shot...” WELL NONE OF THAT SHIT EVER HAPPENED!

So there he is, floundering, there’s nothing going his way, because the politics in WCW kept the biggest potential superstar in wrestling on the goddamn ground! What are you supposed to do? On one hand, they’re paying you a bunch of money – they’re paying HIM a bunch of money. While on this hand they’re saying “hey, go out and give Bagwell a hell of a match. Go out there with an 18 year old German kid. Give him seven good minutes. Let the people see what he can do.” They say you are what you eat. In WCW, they didn’t feed him nothing but garbage, so he let myself become garbage. He became complacent with everything they said. As long as big Ted kept sending in the checks, well, maybe he wasn’t happy with everything that was going on, but he became complacent. Then they send him to Japan, and he got the big injury. Bischoff delivers the shot heard around the damn world. Steve Austin’s out of the high-paying job. All of a sudden the phone starts ringing off the hook. It’s ECW, it’s the WWF, it’s All Japan, it’s New Japan, and all Steve Austin’s gotta do is make a decision. Tod Gordon, whether he remortgaged his house one time, two times, maybe three times, came up with the right figure for Steve Austin to make a decision. He strolsl into the ECW Arena – the biggest piece of crap he's ever seen. He broke in in a building called the Sportatorium in Dallas, Texas. Ever heard of it? Home of the world famous Von Erichs! Everybody who was anybody set foot in the Dallas Sportatorium. For the last two years, all you’ve heard about anywhere in wrestling is the famous ECW Arena. Debut night, he rolls in. You got the Sandman. You got the Raven. You got the Pitbulls. You got Stevie Richards, you got the Public Enemy, you got the Gangstas, you got Mipey Whikrep – whatever the hell his name is! You got a bunch of damn misfits, running around thinking that they can actually wrestle. All I’ve seen in ECW is a bunch of violent crap and that’s exactly what I’ll call it ‘cause that's all it fucking is. Steve Austin is here to wrestle. It’s what he does best. It’s what he does better than anyone in the world. Dean Malenko, Eddie Guerrero, they got the big send-off. Tears were in everybody’s eyes. It was a big deal. All Steve Austin got was a good swift kick in the ass as Bischoff hung up the phone and left him high and dry. There’s no Hogans here. There’s no Flairs here. There’s not a Dusty Rhodes and there damn sure isn’t an Eric Bischoff here. There’s no-one that can hold back Steve Austin now. “Stunning”? Tossed it out the window. Never was meant to be. ECW’s gonna find out first hand what Steve Austin can do. And I’m gonna show everyone here exactly what a true superstar is supposed to do, what a true superstar is supposed to be. Because no-one here can hold me back. Not Tod Gordon. Not Hulk Hogan. Not Eric Bischoff. Nobody. I’m gonna be the superstar that I always knew I could be, because there’s no-one - no-one in ECW that can stop him.

HNGH.

The next few weeks are from the October 7th ECW Arena show. It's not aired in full on any of the shows, but Raven and Stevie won the titles back on 10/7, and then PE won them back to main event. OH MOTHERFUCK. COME ON!

10/28 - ECW ARENA:
-SANDMAN VS. MIKEY FOR THE TITLE IN A LADDER MATCH
-2 COLD SCORPIO VS. ROCCO ROCK FOR THE TV TITLE
-STEINERS VS. ELIMINATORS

An Eliminators hype video airs.

Match #1: Taz vs. Jason
Fun really short squash at some 30 seconds. Taz wins with the Tazmission.
1/4*

Post-match, Joey interviews Taz at ringside. He said he told them he was gonna choke him out, and he did it. He says the Path of Rage is gonna find Scorpio eventually, and he's gonna choke him out too, and warns The Eliminators that The Steiners are gonna kick their fucking asses, and he leaves. Jason comes to in the ring, and El Puerto Ricano comes out for a match. Jason tries to bully him, but he fights back with the babyface jobber offense, and Jason bails.

Cactus Jack and Raven come out, and it's supposed to be Cactus vs. EPR. Cactus gets on the mic before the bell rings and says there's not going to be a match tonight. He says he thinks this kid has a future in this sport, and if they were to engage in combat, not only would he NOT have a future in this sport, but he wouldn't have a future AT ALL. EPR attacks though, so the match happens.

Match #2: Cactus Jack w/ Raven vs. El Puerto Ricano
Awesome character focused Cactus showcase. EPR has quality dropkicks and that's all he does really. Cactus refuses to do the Cactus Elbow, AND PUTS ON A HEADLOCK! YEAH! HUUUUUGE HEAT. FUCK YOU ECW CROWD. Joey goes way overboard and calls it the worst ECW match ever, which...no. Not even close. The fans do the wave. EPR fights back, so Jack throws him out. He eats the Evenflow on the concrete and Raven rolls him in to eat the pin. I loved all of this.
*3/4

They keep on the attack and hit a Spike Piledriver. Tommy Dreamer runs out and attacks Cactus, but Raven saves. Tommy fights back, and both heels get hit with DDTs. Cactus rolls out, AND TOMMY HITS THE CACTUS ELBOW! Tommy brings a chair on the apron, but Raven shoves him off and into the railing. They roll Tommy back in and beat him down and Raven hits him with a chair. He gives it to Cactus, but Cactus refuses to be hardcore even a little, and hits the regular Double Arm DDT. That's then blown up as he wraps his arm in barbed wire and does an elbow drop. Raven slides a table in and puts Tommy on it, so Jack can put him through with a second barbed wire elbow drop. The Pitbulls finally run out to save, after that beatdown went several minutes too long.

10/28 - ECW ARENA:
-TOMMY DREAMER VS. CACTUS JACK

In the back, Raven and Cactus Jack cut a promo. Raven says Tommy's condition tonight was a result of his own selfishness. Years ago, they walked side by side. Best friends. But when he needed him the most, he wasn't there. Now Cactus Jack needs him, and he's not there for him either. So they walk side by side, as true friends that Tommy should have been to both of them. Jack says Tommy HAD to be hurt tonight, because his words were not getting through. A show of force became necessary, but he pities Tommy. Because he didn't realize just how into his brain the hardcore fans had gotten. He took it for granted that one show of force would show him the path, but he doesn't blame Tommy for what they've turned him into. None the less, he had to be hurt. He doesn't think people get what he's going through, the crosses that righteous men like them need to carry. When the world gets him down, he will turn his TV set to WTBS, and let the basking rays of their good and moral programming reign over him. He says in WCW, you truly can be anything you want. He's seen a tough Jewish man from Brooklyn become a black man from Macon. He's seen a farm kid from Nebraska rap, a kid from New England become French, and one wrestler went through five incarnations before finding himself the World Champion in another federation, and that big truck would tell you WCW made him that man. He says changes happen in ECW, he'll grant them that. Two kids with fake British accents changed into scarred mutilated freaks. Where are they now? Mikey was one of the nicest people he ever met, and he's a fool now because of all those concussions. He says it might be cute now to root for that underdog, but in 5 years, it's going to be the saddest thing on Earth when 30 year old Mikey can't hold a job but is too beat up to wrestle at the level these fans want. Then there's Tommy Dreamer. A man on the helm of superstardom, a good looking kid, reduced to a bloodthirsty woman abusing man on a rollercoaster to Hell. Unless he saves the day, and while Tommy's making that very hard, he will persevere. Because he changed too. It wasn't WCW, it wasn't ECW, but it was this man with the courage and compassion to open his eyes. So he's saying the situation is more serious than he'd assume. WCW has a reputation, and Tommy has to change and time is of the essence, and he's trying to save him so they'll still want him. They ask him, if he loves the place, why doesn't he go back? BECAUSE HE CAN'T. IT'S ALL OVER FOR HIM, BECAUSE OF HARDCORE WRESTLING. ALL HE CAN DO NOW IS BE A REMINDER OF JUST WHAT THE PRICE CAN BE, THAT WHEN ECW GETS YOU FOR TOO LONG, YOU'RE RUINED FOREVER. AND HE DESERVES TO ROT IN THIS HELL ON EARTH FOR WHAT HE'S DONE. He says he doesn't think they have a match on October 28th, because he's counting on Tommy to understand, finally, what they're trying to do for him and pick up the phone. That they're his only two friends, not the people chanting for his blood, but these two praying for his soul. Grant him that serenity, Tommy. GRANT IT.

In the ring, Tommy Dreamer is all taped up and with Joey Styles. He says he's on the phone right now with the man he's called to be in his corner on October 28th to watch his back, and he wants them to say hello right now because he's on the line, AND HIS NAME IS TERRY FUNK! YEAH!
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, Since 4/15/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: Public Enemy, Since 10/7/1995

ECW Hardcore TV
October 17th, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


A music video of Beulah airs, set to "Heart Shaped Box".

In the back, The Dudley Family cuts a promo, and a new member introduces his name as BU-BU-BU-BUBBA RAY DUDLEY. YEAH! Dudley Dudley says he does the interviews since he's the only legitimate Dudley, because both his parents were Dudleys. He says Big Dick is what happens when Daddy Dudley has a liason with the Holland Tunnel. Sign Guy Dudley is also there now. Dances With Dudley starts yelling in Spanish. AMAZING.

Match #1: Rey Misterio Jr. vs. Psicosis [Best of Three Falls]
Hey, this is great! It's still rushed, like the last three fall match in ECW, but it's less painfully overbooked and filled with egregious no-selling and they're much more used to three fall matches, so they space shit out better. Rey goes 1-0 with a really pretty Snap Huracanrana. Psicosis turns it into a brawl to take control after that, and he evens it up at 1-1. Final fall, as usual with lucha, is where shit goes from whatever to great. They do significantly crazier shit than 9/16, and since they're just doing shit, nobody can no-sell or anything. Rey gets mad and drawn into a brawl in the final fall, and Psicosis totally smokes him. He hits a Flying Legdrop through a table on the floor, and then puts a chair on him in the ring and hits a Corkscrew Senton for the win. Love the progression of this series, and I await the third match where Rey mans up and takes the brawl to Psic.
***

Clips air of Flock vs. Pitbulls from 10/7. Francine is now managing The Pitbulls. Pitbull #1 fucked his arm up and is stretchered out. The Dudleys interfere everywhere and 911 kills Sign Guy Dudley. Raven distracts referee Tod Gordon and Cactus Jack runs out to DDT #2 on the chair. Raven covers to win. Alfonso then beats up Tod Gordon.

A series of quick promos air while "Wipeout" plays in the background. I'm sure there's a fancy name for this that Biggie will tell me, but it's unnamed as of the debut on this show:
-Bill Alfonso says he showed Tod Gordon
-Tod Gordon says he still makes matches here and he'll show Alfonso just how vengeful he can be
-Cactus Jack says he was on TV for four years and was a tag team champion, and no matter what, nobody can ever take that away from him, and the ECW fans don't deserve to see him wrestle, to see someone like him wrestle, because when history is written, his name will be in the history books with all time great tag teams like Patterson and Stevens, The Funk Brothers, the original Midnight Express, and The American Males. BANG BANG!
-Tommy Dreamer says he too has a higher purpose, but the show cuts off right at that because they ran out of time.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, Since 4/15/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: Public Enemy, Since 10/7/1995

ECW Hardcore TV
October 24th, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


Highlights air from the three way dance where PE regained the titles. AWFUL. Joey talks over all of it, but the sound on the footage is turned WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY down, so it's Joey talking over silence.

In the back, Joey Styles interviews Stevie Richards. Stevie says PE lit a fire under Stevie's heiney and he's going to open up a can of asswhip. He says he blames Johnny Grunge, and they're going to have a match where the loser must wear a dress. What? Why is this happening? Via pretape from Chicago...NOPE. GET THE FUCK OUT JOHNNY GRUNGE. YOU LEAVE AND YOU LEAVE NOW. He says he accepts and he'll put Stevie in a dress and treat him like that boy he had when he was in lock up. Cool, so Grunge is admitting that he's fucked dudes. Awesome. Back in the backstage area, Jason comes over. Stevie says he loves his new suit, and Jason thanks him and says he wears his shorts in a most masculine way. Jason says if he loses, he would like to wear the dress for him. What? Why? Stevie accepts. We throw it back to that faggot and he claims he built the ECW Arena by hand with Rocco. He says one of them will leave wearing that dress.

The Sandman vs. Mikey for the ECW Title was supposed to happen on October 7th, and we cut to video of what happened. Before the bell, Steve Austin comes out and he gets on the mic. He says he came out to wish them good luck last time and it pisses him off to see a piece of crap like him defend a World Heavyweight belt. The doctor tells him in six weeks, he'll be able to walk all over his ass. But no, they don't gotta wait, because he can throw his ass out and they can do this, AND SANDMAN CANES AUSTIN! Sandman gets on the mic and says this ain't Atlanta and it ain't the WCW and he's the extreme Heavyweight Champion and he's just another jabroni, and he keeps caning him AND CALLS HIM A HOGAN WANNABE. AUSTIN TACKLES HIM AND THEY FIGHT! The locker room comes out to pull them apart AND UGH FUCKING KONNAN IS HERE? He and Sandman face off and then they fight. The locker room then pulls Konnan off and Austin attacks Sandman now. Sandman finally has to just bail, and Sandman gets away from his title match.

In a pretape, The Sandman and Woman talk. Sandman says he's the King of Extreme, and on October 28th, he'll get so extreme, Johnny Cochran won't be able to get him off. Woman says she lives for this belt, she breaths for this belt, and she owns this belt, and they're going to own him.

PULP FICTION:
-Tommy Dreamer says he fears no evil as he walks through the valley of the shadow of death, because he will unlock a dark side so hardcore that even Terry Funk will be appalled
-Bubba Ray Dudley just says BUH 5 times
-Cactus Jack says it's all true, and he wanted to believe it wasn't. He's really going to bring him here? The one thing he knows can stand in the way of his path to righteousness. He says he'll have to have enough love for them both, because Tommy has none for himself. Terry Funk makes him the kind of man he doesn't want to be anymore
-Terry Funk says he's back, Cactus!
-Tommy Dreamer yells that he's going to drag the hardcore back out of Cactus Jack


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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: The Sandman, Since 4/15/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: Public Enemy, Since 10/7/1995

ECW Hardcore TV
October 31st, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


Steve Austin as Eric Bischoff airs to open the show. I wish I could find it on youtube, but LOLWWE.

TONIGHT: SANDMAN/MIKEY IN A LADDER MATCH! EXCEPT WITH PINFALLS! SO JUST A MATCH. K.

JOEY ANNOUNCES SHIT FOR NOVEMBER TO REMEMBER:
-HNGH "NOVEMBER RAIN"
-It will be on 11/18 at the ECW Arena
-It's PE vs. The Sandman/2 Cold Scorpio for the Tag Titles
-MAIN EVENT IS RAVEN/CACTUS JACK VS. TOMMY DREAMER/TERRY FUNK. JESUS
-Also Steve Austin vs. Mikey Whipwreck

That faggot Lance Wright shills the classic EC F'N W shirt.

The Pitbulls are in the ring after a squash, and Jason comes out. Jason says he knew that some day they would be champions of ECW, and he made a mistake selling their contracts to Stevie Richards, but if they were still with him, they would still be champions. He says to ditch the prostitute and they will come back to the titles under his guidance. They hold her back, AND JASON KICKS HER IN THE FACE! The Eliminators then run out and attack The Pitbulls! They hit #2 with TOTAL ELIMINATION~, but Joey calls it Hurricane Eliminator. Rick Steiner and Taz run out for the save and they clear them from the ring.

In a pretape, the Dudley family talks. BUH BUH BUH BUH -- Big Dick hits him with the crutch and Bubba yells that his name is Bubba Ray Dudley. Dudley Dudley says his speech impediment is rough, but they've taught him some things. Bubba then dances a lot. BA BA BA BA -- Big Dick hits him again and he yells EVERYBODY HAVE A PLEASANT EVENING.

Match #1: The Sandman [c] w/ Woman vs. Mikey Whipwreck [ECW World Heavyweight Championship - Sort Of Ladder Match]
Really entertaining brawl. They pull off a great underdog story surrounded by all the violence, as Sandman gradually loses more and more control of Mikey after initially treating him like shit. Sandman gets him hurt by the end though, but after Austin comes out and takes Woman away to the back, he gets distracted and Mikey goes wild with ladder shit. MIKEY HITS A SPLASH TO SANDMAN BURIED UNDER A LADDER! AND MIKEY WINS THE TITLE! YEAH!
**3/4

Cactus runs out to hug him, but then leaves when all the other babyfaces come out to celebrate with Mikey. Really awesome feelgood moment.

They then play the hoooorrible/hilarious Sid Vicious cover of "My Way" to clips of Sandman's title reign. SO AMAZING.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: Mikey Whipwreck, Since 10/28/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: Public Enemy, Since 10/7/1995

ECW Hamcore TV
November 7th, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


Footage airs of Mikey's win to open the show.

Match #1: JT Smith vs. El Puerto Ricano
FUCK YEAH ITALIAN JT SMITH. Ricano makes with the cool athletic feats and JT is great as usual. The fucking up gimmick is really an albatross around his neck as he does this awesome Double A Spinebuster spin into an Overhead Belly to Belly and then does the Ultimo Dragon-style Slingshot Liger Bomb to win. Awesome squash.
**

The Sandman runs out and attacks them both with the cane, as this match took place after the title match.

Match #2: Hack Myers vs. Dances With Dudley
This happened. SHAH does stuff. He wins.
1/2*

The Sandman comes back out AGAIN, and destroys both men with cane shots.

A long video airs recapping last year's November to Remember.

ADDED TO NOVEMBER TO REMEMBER:
-THE PITBULLS VS. THE ELIMINATORS
-Now it's just saying "Steve Austin Returns To Action!"
-REY/PSICOSIS III IN A MEXICAN DEATH MATCH

Before Scorpio/Rocco, Scorpio challenges Rocco to put the Tag Titles up against his TV Title, and Joey says if he wins, then he and Sandman are champions. Sandman interferes before the bell, but Johnny Grunge chases him to the back.

The match is clipped, and looking at the results of the event, that's a great thing to finally happen BECAUSE IT WENT 24 MINUTES. They have a fall into a flaming table and Scorpio stop the match to put Rocco out of fire, and he helps him up. He gives him the tag title back and holds his arm up, BUT THEN CLOTHESLINES HIM AND PINS TO WIN THE TAG TITLES! YEAH! AWESOME!

A replay airs of Austin as Eric Bischoff.

We cut to the middle of Beulah's Box. Unfortunately, I mean the segment. She's interviewing Tod Gordon in the ring, but Bill Alfonso attacks him with a chair. She gets mad at him and attacks him and has to be pulled off. DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON'T CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE.

PULP FICTION:
-Alfonso says he's not through with Tod Gordon or ECW
-Public Enemy say they want their belts back, but announce that if they beat Scorp at N2R, then they get the TV Title, and if they beat Sandman, they get a World Title shot
-BUH BUH BUH BUH BUH - MY NAME IS BUBBA RAY DUDLEY
-The video ends after that
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: Mikey Whipwreck, Since 10/28/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: The Sandman/2 Cold Scorpio, Since 10/28/1995

ECW Hardcore TV
November 14th, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


We're supposed to start in the ring with the Cactus/Tommy main event from 10/28's Arena show. Cactus gets on the mic and says he's had his differences with ECW, but he's never been prouder than when Mikey won that title tonight. But the people took what was a special day for him and THEY RUINED IT. He says he'd rather be watching TBS, where they don't cheer a man being lit on fire and where he could watch Movies For Guys Who Love Movies, but he has a higher purpose. He says his instinct is to slap the shit out of Tommy Dreamer, but that would give them too much enjoyment, and tells everyone to get ready for the most boring match they've ever dreamed of!

In a pretape, Tommy Dreamer is in the back and says he just heard that, and any time Cactus gets in the ring with him, he's in for a fight.

Instead of the match, they show clips mixed in with Tommy speaking in a monotone voice about how bad it was and how he hates Cactus. He is absolutely not holding up his end of this feud. I mean, it's 1995 Cactus Jack, but still. Try something besides GRR FACE. The match seems like it rules, as it's Cactus trolling the fans and yeah. He does headlocks on the floor and wrestles a normal match as Joey shits on them. OH, IT'S ONLY OKAY WHEN PEOPLE FROM NEW JAPAN WORK HOLDS? FUCK YOU. This was just a weird production in general. They basically aired the entire match, but the interviews broke the flow up entirely, so it's not something I can rate. No idea why they tried to fuck with the classic match and then promo format. Anyways, Raven comes out to interfere and then Cactus beats him down. He refuses to pin him because the fans don't deserve a finish! Terry Funk then runs out to stop him and Tommy and Funk make a comeback, and they run off Cactus and Raven.

PULP FICTION IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SHOW:
-Konnan wants to earn respect like Rey and Psicosis. Fuck you, no.
-Cactus says he broke Tommy's nose like Vader did to him, and he feels so much better now, because everything that happened to him is going to happen to Tommy
-Alfonso says Gordon is a businessman and he's been smacked by Dory Funk Jr. and he's been stabbed by Kevin Sullivan, and they have a match at N2R now
-The Eliminators laugh at The Pitbulls
-Dances With Dudley yells in Mexican
-Past lines from summer Raven promos about Tommy are aired

Match #1: Rey Misterio Jr./Konnan vs. Psicosis/La Parka
This isn't as good as the singles matches, but Rey/Psic is awesome again. A lot like WCW Konnan, where there's tons of talented dudes killing themselves and he just sort of lazily does offense. They clip a TON out though, and we only see 5 minutes of super crisp and cool spots. Rey and Konnan invent the Doomsday Rana. Konnan and Rey cut off Stereo Topes with chair shots, and get back in to win by count out.
**1/2

The goddamn "November Rain" video finally airs. GOAT ECW music video probably.


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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: Mikey Whipwreck, Since 10/28/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: The Sandman/2 Cold Scorpio, Since 10/28/1995

Posted Image

ECW NOVEMBER TO REMEMBER 1995
NOVEMBER 18TH, 1995
PHILADELPHIA, PA


In the back, Joey Styles runs down the card, and clarifies that the winner of the fall in the Tag Title match will get the ECW Title shot later that night, and Paul E. Dangerously has promised to make tonight truly a November to remember.

Before the opener, the full Dudley family of Big Dick, Dances With, Chubby, Sign Guy, and Dudley come out before Don E. Allen vs. Broad Street Bully and they introduce Bubba Ray Dudley as the special guest ring announcer! AND OH MY GOD.

Posted Image

Bubba thanks the Dudley cousins for all the help with his small problem. No longer is he an insecure nervous stuttering bitch. Bubba uncorks an amazing Buffer style introduction AND LIVE FROM SOUTH PHILADELPHIA LET'S GET REEEEEEAAAAAAAADY TOOOOO RUH RUH RUH RUH RUH. LET'S GET READY TO RUH RUH RUH RUH. Big Dick hits him with a crotch, and Bubba yells "FUCK THIS" and attacks the jobbers. He kills them both with Powerbombs, and has saved us from this match. Even more reason to love the Dudleys. Bubba covers Bully and somehow wins the match. Okay then.

Paul E. Dangerously comes from the back with his headset still on, and he calls to dim the lights. The lights go out, and after a few moments, they come back on and...

Posted Image

IT'S FUCKING SABU. SABU IS BACK AND THEY HUG! YEAH! Paul promises the in-ring return of Sabu tonight. They've already done an amazing job of making this feel like not just the biggest show of the year but the hugest ECW show ever, so kudos. Although Mikey/Sandman's switch should have been here, but oh well.

Konnan and Jason both come out, and the crowd thankfully says they both suck the dick. Joey Styles brings out Taz for an interview before he is the special guest referee for Jason vs. Konnan. Everyone is using horrible instrumental/techno on this set again. GOD DAMNIT. He says he was supposed to be in this match, but ECW says his neck still isn't healed and he's an insurance liability. And if he can't wrestle, he'll still be here to enforce his will. Jason tells him to go home and to stop being a bitch. Taz asks if he's ready, and he says yes, SO TAZ PUNCHES HIM IN THE FACE AND CALLS THE BELL!

Match #1: Konnan vs. Jason [Special Referee: Taz]
Konnan hits a standing Splash Mountain Bomb to win immediately.
ODELAY

As Stevie Richards comes out, THE BLUE MEANIE IS IN THE CROWD AND GIVES HIM A FLOCK OF SEAGULLS HALF-SHIRT! YEAH! Stevie loves it and invites him to be in his corner tonight.

Match #2: Stevie Richards w/ The Blue Meanie vs. El Puerto Ricano
This ruled for 3 minutes. EPR makes with the amazing dives again to start until Meanie interferes. Stevie looks really good on offense and forces Meanie to come in. He makes him try a Moonsault, but he misses and gets a "YOU FAT FUCK!" chant. EPR almost wins with a roll up, but Stevie kills him with the Steviekick to win.
*3/4

Stevie drags Meanie to the back by the hair like Raven does to him.

Match #3: The Eliminators vs. The Pitbulls
Jason and Francine are ringside with their teams. This was solid enough for a power fight between inexperienced teams. The Eliminators made with the crazy spots for their size, and they're like 90% accurate, which is super impressive. The problem was that they tried this spotfest style thing, and they don't have enough stuff to fill 11 minutes like that nor are they good at filling the time between cool stuff. That being said, the final moments had tons of cool shit and made this worthwhile. The over the top Doomsday Device is SOOOO fucking cool, and Kronus backflipped Saturn over the top into a Moonsault dive, being both insanely athletic for their size and innovative. Kronus is hit with the Superbomb for the win. I believe they have a great match in them, but I don't know what it would take to get it out.
**1/4

Jason tries to rape Francine, so the Pitbulls attack. This is a distraction, and they get attacked from behind by The Eliminators with chair shots. They then lay out both men with TOTAL ELIMINATION~, now with Joey calling it properly. They leave with Jason.

Match #4: Rey Misterio Jr. vs. Psicosis [Mexican Death Match]
This is just a Texas Death Match. I really don't like this style of match, because it can turn into shit that would NEVER get a pin ever getting one for the sake of the gimmick, and it's rare you see one worked like it should be (Storm/Harris). That being said, they did it well, using flash pins and lucha stuff early on and moving to more extreme stuff. They continued the story from the first two matches, and this time, Rey gets extreme and thrives at it to beat Psicosis. As for the actual match, Psicosis takes INSANE bumps from the opening bell, and Rey is Rey. They fight into the crowd and this ends with the famous Huracanrana on the stage spot, and Psic doesn't get up before 10. This was great, but I think the October match was their best one in ECW.
***

Jason comes out, and he puts Rey over in the ring. He offers to manage Rey, but Rey shakes his head and tries to be nice about it. So Jason calls him a little bitch, and The Eliminators run out to kill Rey. TOTAL ELIMINATION~. 911 then comes out, and he Chokeslams both of them. Rey then gets on his shoulders and 911 parades him around.

Before the tag match, PE get a "PLEASE DON'T GO!" chant, because ECW fans are fucking idiots. Joey says they've been getting offers from other places now that they're not champions. The optimism of ECW in 1995 thinking that holding a title will stop somebody from leaving is so cute. Scorpio gets on the mic and says he'll give some credit where credit is due, AND SAYS THEY'RE THE CHAMPS MAN! YEAH! PE tries a dance off, and Scorp easily wins on account of blackness. Woman dances too to lure them in, and then Sandman and Scorpio finally haul off and beat on these faggots.

Match #5: The Sandman/2 Cold Scorpio [c] w/ Woman vs. Public Enemy [ECW Tag Team Championship - Winner Gets Title Shot]
This gets 16 minutes and is the longest match of the night, because fuck literally everything. It's not good. The champions try, but y'know, it's PE. They try to work a real match, and it's so cute that they think they're capable of that. Probably a good idea to at least fucking attempt it before going to WCW though. Scorp and Sandman's control seg is the only good thing in this match. Finally becomes a brawl, and it's more of a PE brawl than a Sandman one. Blood, aimless violence, clubberin. Sandman gets split open and when Scorpio ducks the Drive By, Sandman falls on top of Grunge for the win and the title shot. YAY!
*1/2

Scorpio revives Sandman with beer and helps him up. He drops it, and Sandman freaks out and almost canes him over a spilled beer before they hug each other and make up. That ruled.

Match #6: Tod Gordon vs. Bill Alfonso [Special Referee: Beulah McGillicutty]
Fonzie attacks Beulah to take her out at some point in this horrible brawl. This isn't the worst ECW match of the year, but that's almost only because of expectations. They're not trained, so you're not mad at them for sucking. Maybe a little mad at Tod Gordon for allowing this to be on the show, but not mad at them for being shitty, like you are with Public Enemy or Paul Lauria or Jason, etc. Gordon has it won, and referee Taz runs out. He refuses to count all the way to three, AND TAZ HITS GORDON, PULLS FONZIE ON TOP, AND COUNTS TO THREE.
WELP

The fans chant for Sabu. Taz gets on the mic and says THEY CAN CHANT HIS FUCKIN NAME ALL THEY WANT, BUT HE AINT COMIN. Taz says nobody sent a card, letter, or phone call. Everyone cries when Tommy breaks his fingers. Everyone cries about Terry Funk. And then the almighty, their king, Sabu nearly gets his neck snapped by Chris Benoit, and everyone is pissing and fucking moaning about fucking Sabu. WHAT ABOUT HIM? FUCK TAZ, RIGHT? NO FUCK YOU. He says his buddy Paul Heyman says to take his time and not to worry, and he'll get back to work real soon. The problem is that his dad isn't a lawyer who pays for him, and he's gotta pay his fucking bills. He says Bill Alfonso cares about him, wants to put food on his table, wants to put money in his pocket, and the crowd chants "SUCK HIS DICK!" Awesome. He says the people don't care about him, so he doesn't give a flying fuck about them. RULED. Taz challenges fans to fight, but the cops won't let them.

The Sandman and Woman come out for the title match, BUT STEVE AUSTIN ATTACKS HIM FROM BEHIND! He canes The Sandman and hits the Stun Gun onto the railing! AUSTIN GRABS A BEER AND CHUGS IT (because while Doink the Clown had green hair and a rubber nose, Steve Austin was drinking his first beer in ECW, damn you). Austin calls Mikey out to the ring to put his title up. Mikey comes out and is scared, and Austin says for the next few minutes, he's Eric Bischoff.

Match #7: Mikey Whipwreck [c] vs. Steve Austin [ECW World Heavyweight Championship]
Great short match for 4 minutes, and a beautiful underdog story. Mikey gets some brief offense on the floor with amazing Austin selling, but is otherwise beat up all match. Austin doesn't take him seriously at all and treats it like a public workout. He gets distracted by the crowd, AND MIKEY GETS A ROLL UP TO WIN!
**1/4

Austin kills Mikey with a clothesline, and beats him up some more before leaving. Mikey waits until Austin is in the back, and immediately grabs the title and runs away hahahahahaha.

Match #8: Sabu w/ Paul E. Dangerously vs. Hack Myers
This happens. It's a solid return showcase for Sabu, and he looks awesome, so this did what it needed to do. But then it drags on, and this didn't need 13 minutes. SHAH is cool and all, but nobody thinks he's fucking with Sabu here and him getting nearfalls is laughable. Fun Sabu moments though. Sabu wins with the Arabian Facebuster off the top.
**

Sabu shakes Hack's hand for some reason.

Match #9: Raven/Cactus Jack vs. Tommy Dreamer/Terry Funk
This started off amazingly. Terry and Cactus do their thing. Raven and Dreamer take cues from them and have some awesome moments too. . Cactus takes off the DOD shirt and has one with Eric Bischoff's face on it and FORGIVE ME UNCLE ERIC on the back. In a really bad looking spot, Tommy pulls it over his head and Joey yells that he's punching Eric. It slowed down some in the middle like a lot of these matches, but unlike many, it never really recovered. I compare this to Shane/Cactus vs. Funk/Sandman in March, and they went everywhere and changed up the combos and had unique stuff, but here they stayed at ringside and hit each other with stuff for a while and it fell apart when they ran out of stuff to do. There's a weird thing where Taz and Fonzie come out to count a nearfall, but Terry kicks out. Tommy stares down Taz and Taz and Fonzie leave after Raven knocks down Tommy. Why even do that? There were a few unique cool things, but it just felt aimless in the second half. The ref gets back up, and they sort of just decide to end it now. Tommy Piledrives Raven o na chair, and lets Funk take the cover for 3.
**3/4

They keep fighting and Cactus and Funk fight away. Stevie comes out to fight Tommy, and it allows Raven to recover, and he lays out Tommy with the Evenflow before they leave. Why not just let the babyfaces win on the biggest show of the year? I get that Raven has his number and all, but god damn man.

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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: Mikey Whipwreck, Since 10/28/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: The Sandman/2 Cold Scorpio, Since 10/28/1995

ECW Hardcore TV
November 21st, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


The awesome Dudleys segment opens the show.

Then Sandman/Scorpio vs. PE.

ECW ARENA RETURN - 12/9/1995! DON'T HAVE THIS SHOW EITHER!

Austin/Mikey is up next.

We finally got to some promos as Raven cuts a pretaped one, hyping up the Ultimate Jeopardy match for this Thanksgiving night that ended up being moved to 12/9. He says if he loses, he loses Beulah. Big deal. She'll always come back. She always has, since he was 12. He says when he was 16, after the summer camp, he needed someone there for him. Tommy will say he was there, but he wasn't. He'll give a million excuses, but he wasn't there when he needed someone. He says if Tommy Dreamer loses, he leaves with a shaved head. Like he cares. He'll leave with a cracked skull, that might give him some solace. It'd make him happier if -- TOMMY TACKLES HIM INTO THE WALL! He punches at him and yells that he was there, and he'll see him in the cage.

The return of Sabu ends the show.
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Big Tuna
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The Master and Ruler Of The World

ECW World Heavyweight Champion: Mikey Whipwreck, Since 10/28/1995
ECW Television Champion: 2 Cold Scorpio, Since 8/25/1995
ECW Tag Team Champions: The Sandman/2 Cold Scorpio, Since 10/28/1995

ECW Hardcore TV
November 28th, 1995
Philadelphia, PA


The Sabu return also opens the show, with highlights of his career then shown, set to "Grind" by Alice in Chains.

Konnan vs. Jason airs.

The ending minute of a Mikey Whipwreck vs. Rey Misterio Jr. match airs from a ECW Fan Cam shot. It looks great, but again, that's a minute aired. Mikey wins, and he puts Rey over post-match.

DECEMBER 9TH - ECW ARENA - DECEMBER TO DISMEMBER:
-RAVEN/STEVIE/ELIMINATORS/? VS. TOMMY/PUBLIC ENEMY/PITBULLS IN ULTIMATE JEOPARDY
-That's a cage match where each man has something on the line, but they don't clarify what besides what Raven said last week
-Taz returns to the ring!
-MIKEY/SANDMAN/AUSTIN FOR THE ECW TITLE!

In a pretape, Steve Austin cuts a promo via phone, and he yells at Lance Wright for getting his phone number. He says the bottom line is that on December 9th, he's leaving as the World Heavyweight Championship. Enough said.

Alfonso vs. Tod Gordon and the post-match airs.

In the back, Joey Styles interviews Taz and Bill Alfonso. He says he always looked up to Taz and said he couldn't have meant what he said to the fans. Taz moves around and says Joey is standing to close to his man Alfonso. He says first of all, not to ever talk in that tone to him again, or he'll bust his jaw. Second of all, he's his hero? He's not the guy to look up to, and tells him to be a man. He asks if he's gonna cry now, and says to talk, Mr. OH MY GAWD~, and keeps asking if he's gonna cry. He says to insult him now, and Joey leaves. Really felt like a prototype of the amazing Austin beating up JR angle after WrestleMania X7, which makes sense since Paul was booking that too.

PULP FICTION:
-Taz stands in front of Alfonso and says to get to Bill you gotta go through him
-Stevie Richards is mad that he has to face The Pitbulls, PE, and Tommy all alone if he loses Ultimate Jeopardy. But if you think Stevie is afraid, YOU'RE RIGHT.
-The Pitbulls say the Public Enemy better know what team they're on
-PE tells the Pitbulls to be smart, and if Tommy screws up, they'll shave his head for them. If they lose, they have to face each other.
-Cactus Jack says they've had a small misunderstanding, and has a suit on, his hair pulled back, and the sides of his face shaved. He says he is hardcore, and he won't be at this next coming show, but he will be there in spirit, so he's asking for a personal favor even though he doesn't deserve it. He wants to start all over and he knows how it hurt Tommy Dreamer that people didn't like him and said he wasn't hardcore, but he's gone too far to prove them wrong and earn their love. He asks the fans to not encourage hardcore behavior and to stop corrupting that nice sensitive kid Tommy Dreamer.
-Francine is hot
-Bill Alfonso dares someone to knock the chop off of Taz's shoulder
-Cactus Jack shows off his missing ear, and says he's hardcore. His teeth are also missing, and he starts yelling, "I'M HARDCORE! I'M HARDCORE! I'M HARDCORE!"
-BUH BUH BUH BUH
-Cactus Jack tries to wear glasses, but they are slanted. "Look! I can't even wear glasses because my ear is missing! I'M HARDCORE! I'M HARDCORE! I'M HARDCORE!"
-Let's get ready to RUH RUH RUH RUH RUH RUH
-The Pitbulls show their injuries off, and Francine says she broke her nail off in Jason's eye
-This week on Beulah's Box, she's with the first family of wrestling. Bubba says they should rearrange the alphabet and put U and I together. AND THEY LEAVE TOGETHER?! FUCK YEAH BUBBA.
-Nevermore
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