EST. AUGUST 2016 - TOKYO, JAPAN
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| Lvl 2 - You Can Drink To That | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Apr 3 2018, 01:16 PM (74 Views) | |
| Szalinski | Apr 3 2018, 01:16 PM Post #1 |
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Everybody has two stories. The story they tell you, and the story they won't tell you. In order for this to work, I have to tell you both stories at the same time. This might get a little confusing, but trust me. In the end you're going to appreciate this. The man you know as Father O'White is not the man you think he is. He's definitely a good dude. He stands up for the innocent, he defends the weak, he protects the feeble, and he tips the bartender. And he is as tough as they come. He's a good guy. Definitely better than his daddy, who was never around. But believe me when I say, he is not your typical wrestler. Not even close. Maybe someday he will embrace his true identity. If he ever discovers it. --- 1999 --- "You're sure?" "Honey, this is the third test." "So..." "Yep." "Well..." "...shit." ".....what do we do?" "I guess we just go back home and be another teenage couple with a kid." "Fuck that, babe." "You got any other suggestions? I'm not getting an abortion..." "Oh, fuck that too." "Then what?" "We could always do what my parents did with me..." "...are you serious?" "Look. We're both about to get into a career where we're never gonna be home. It's leave the baby with your mom, or take the kid on the road with us. Why not just give him a chance at life? The life he deserves. And then when he gets older, he can go looking for us and we'll be waiting with open arms." "....I don't know, [NAME REDACTED SO YOU FUCKERS DON'T GET SPOILED] it just seems..." "It's the best thing we can do." "You're right. So it's settled. I'll carry the baby to term and then adopt him out." "And your brothers can use their connections to keep track of where he goes." "Exactly." ---- 2018 ---- I just had the strangest dream. A man with no face came to me. He was not threatening nor deceptive. In fact, I felt like I knew him my whole life. I felt like he was a part of me. He knew things about me that I never told anyone. He then said something that shook me to my very core. He said to me, "be the justice I couldn't be." And he vanished. I woke up. "Father!" And here I am, having garments thrown at me. "Get up. Promos in 30 minutes." I nodded. "Jesus. Clean up. You look like shit, kid." "Mmmhmmm." With your fat bald Ralphus lookin' ass. Wait...what? What did I just think? "Get your gimmicks on, I'll see you downstairs." Ralphus shut the door and left me in my room. I guess I have to get dressed and do one of these...promos...whatever this is. I don't know. I need a drink. ---- 2008 ---- He hadn't eaten in two days. He spent the prior night sleeping in the hallway of his friend's apartment building. Columbus was a dangerous city, especially for someone his age. He was way too young to be roaming the streets after dark. But he had nowhere to go. When he was four, his mother passed away from a brain aneurysm. It was sudden, unexpected, and it drove his family into a dark place. His father drank excessively, and had recently turned to heroin. A new antidrug on the market, Narcan, was successful in saving his life once. The second time, nothing could bring him back. He had nobody. He had nothing. He was cold, hungry, and alone. And for the first time in his life, he began to wonder if maybe something wasn't right. ---- 2018 ---- Closing the door behind me, I made it out of my room with six minutes to spare, according to the sundial on the wall. With my robe and my staff, I gave my lord a quick prayer by tapping the flask on my side. As soon as I looked up, I had Ralphus in my face. "God damn it, kid, let's go. I swear to God..." I don't feel anger towards him. I feel pity. What has him so angry? Perhaps if he took a moment to hear about the great Cayden Cailean, he may find some joy in his life. "You better be able to cut the promo, because you're about as dependable as a diaper on a porcupine." What the fuck is this guy talking about? "We got the deets on a sheet downstairs. You'll have like ten seconds to look it over, since your drunken ass slept the whole morning. I'm glad you beat that fat Jersey fuck in three minutes, because if that match had gone any longer you would have been sucking down air like girls on Tinder suck dick." Jersey? Tinder? Dick? This guy is crazy. "They told me you weren't coming in totally untrained. Well, you're greenhorn as shit son. You got a hell of a lot to learn about this business. You can't just walk around drunk all the god damn time, you unsafe working piece of shit - HEY! JACKOFF! ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?" Why is this big metal box that we're standing in moving? ---- 2016 ---- "HAPPY BIRTHDAY ROSS!" Ross looked around the picnic table. This was his first birthday cake. This was his first birthday party. "How's it feel to be sixteen, bro?" "Happy birthday, sweetheart..." Ross was no longer cold or hungry. Ross found a home. Ross found a life. He even got himself a girlfriend. But Ross was still alone. "....thank you..." Ross knew he was an anomaly. He was out of place. Delaware was a quiet little suburb, and he often found himself wandering the streets after dark searching for something, anything to make him feel alive. Something was missing inside of him. Nothing seemed to fill that void. His new friends, his girlfriend, not even receiving his purple belt in Jiu-Jitsu or winning a JV wrestling tournament seemed to perk him up. "A drink for the birthday boy?" Ross drank his first beer. ---- 194? ---- "Mamy cztery do jednego, sir!" "POKRYWA! PRZYCHODZĄCE!" "Do cholery! Jesteśmy tu zabijani!" "Zostaliśmy przygwożdżeni! Pieprzone komunistyczne dranie!" "SZALINSKI! WRÓĆ TUTAJ TERAZ!" ---- 2018 ---- "LET US DRINK TO THE GODS!" Wow. These people are definitely followers of Cayden Cailean. I've been drinking here every night since I came to this land. No fights, no anger, no negativity. Just people smiling, laughing, and enjoying their time on this earth. Just the way it should be. "DILLY DILLY!" I count sixty-three hands raising glasses. Sixty-four including my own. "GENTLEMEN! LADIES!" Somehow, I commanded their attention and reverence with respect. Maybe it's the staff. "Remember this day...and keep it holy. For all of us here today owe our thanks..." I made my little half-smirk that I always make. "For thanks to my Lord, we are able to live in a world where things like equality and justice can still prevail! But we must aid it along! For when good men and women do nothing, evil will win every single time!" "FUCK EVIL!" "FUCK IT IN THE EAR!" "LET US DRINK TO FUCKING EVIL!" I don't know how much beer I've had to drink tonight, but I can tell you this. It's never enough. There is some guy waving a big contraption of glass and light in my face. They told me to just talk to it like it was a person. So I am. By holding my flask up to this motherfucker. "Shall you join me in this drink?" Have I mentioned how much I love sake? "Don't be scared. I was scared too, my first time. But now...now I don't even give it a second thought. I just raise my glass and kick that ass!" Whoa. It's that easy to get a room full of people to cheer for you. The only reason we all got quiet was to drink together. "Now I know a lot of you are asking. Father O'White, who is the great Cayden Cailean? And why do you speak of him so highly? I don't want to preach to you. I'm drunk. I just want to explain something to you. What if you found a purpose to live that not only made life worth living, but made life awesome? I can't help it. My man Cayden gave me something to do. He gave me a great task. My task is two-fold, and as simple as it gets." I know people can count, but I'm raising my finger for dramatic effect anyway. "Number one, I am to defend the weak and innocent against those who prey on them. I stand for those who are unable to stand for themselves, and what is it that you all say to people who stand against you? Something like....what was it...." Look back to the crowd, look back to the crowd... "...fuck them?" "FUCK THEM!!!!" "That's right! Fuck you! If you stand against justice and equality, FUCK YOU! If you cannot subjugate yourself to virtuous principles, FUCK YOU! HEY! YOU GOT A PROBLEM? FUCK! YOU!" On fuck and you, I practically knocked the poor glass disc machine guy over (and almost dropped my flask, nope gotta save that) putting my fist out. "Number ONE! I am here to fight the evils of this world! And number TWO! I AM TO GET DRUNK AS FUCK IN THE PROCESS!!!" "YAY!!!" "Now let us get down to business. Sorry, everyone...sorry...sorry...I gotta be serious for a minute..." "Awww..." "FUCK THAT!" "YOU SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH AND HAVE SOME RESPECT FOR THE HOLY MAN! GOD DAMN IT!" "RESPECT!" Okay, so they told me that when this happens, just walk somewhere quiet and this guy will follow me. And just keep talking. It'll all be okay. "If you'll come with me, let us talk about the important matters at hand..." "I'LL PUT A FUCKIN' HOLE IN YOU WITH MY FUCKIN' DICK IF YOU DON'T SHUT YOUR FUCKING COCK HOLSTER.." "YOU'RE LUCKY I'M TOO DRUNK TO PISS OR I WOULD PUT THE FEAR OF GOD IN YOUR HEATHEN PAGAN ASS!" Okay. I have to stop and just shake my head at that one. Cayden, be with them in their moment of idiocy. All right, this little hallway here seems like a quiet place. "So it is known that Father O'White is here. You have seen what I stand for, and you have seen my strength. Now you will soon see my endurance. You will see that I have a firm, constitute grasp on my goals and what I must do to obtain them. I know that the Carnage Carnival is not going to just be a long weekend. This is a true test of grit. This seperates the true from the false." Okay...so I just keep talking, and this thing just keeps follwing my words...? It's like giving a sermon, only my congregation is this glass lens. I think I can do this.. "This is just like the Test of the Starstone. My lord, the great Cayden Cailean, acheived godhood by facing a pyramid of tests just like this one I face in just a few short weeks at the Korauken. You see, it seemed like an impossible task. Only two mortal men had ever ascended to become deities. Two. Of all those who tried, only two had succeeded. And Cayden did not even truly wish to become a deity. No one is truly better than another. The mere concept of me...Father O' White, a simple man...somehow winning this contest and obtaining the Yamashi Cup...it not only confounds me, it also kind of unnerves me. I do not wish to be seen as anyone's superior." "And neither did my lord. He just got drunk with his buddy, got dared to try it out, and he won the dare. Cayden Cailean had climbed the unclimable summit and acheived true ascension. He never forgot who he was. He never changed or abandoned his principles. He used his new found powers to attempt to share his dreams to the world. He did his best to spread it around so that everybody could feel like they were important, that they weren't lower than somebody else because of who they were...he wanted a world where everyone was equal. And perhaps in these twelve nights of pure hell, we will all be equal under the lights when the bell rings. Nothing else will matter, past or future, but that moment in time." "It will not matter that Kalinda Kriegsdorf has a pet dragon. It will not matter that Cactus Jack Bronson is a fuckin' asshole. It will not matter that I have just arrived to a place that many of you have been for most of your lives. It will not matter that Joe Stanton will wrestle for anybody with a ring. It will not matter that Blaise Fader HAS wrestled for anybody with a ring. It will not matter that Japan lets me drink but America won't. Nothing else will matter except the two of us in that ring." You know, I might have just broke character. Fuck it. They know it's fake. "And the confidence I have in my mission will carry me through to the end. Believe me when I tell you, I will acheive what I have set out to do....or somebody's gonna have to kill me. You can drink to that." I'm gonna end it here, nod at the glass thing, and go have some more to drink. |
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