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| The Great Banana Rush | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Dec 17 2007, 07:27 PM (8,461 Views) | |
| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:13 PM Post #691 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Constantine Malachite's command centre, Lehpuhrta] Something's wrong! +++ATTENTION - CONFIRMATION OF WORMHOLE OPENING NOT RECEIVED.+++ Put me through to Agent Yellow! +++COMPLYING+++ Dave! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:13 PM Post #692 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Hanger 6, Lehpuhrta] Agent Yellow here. "Dave! Urgent mission! I need you at the splortal in West-Side... now!" Now, sir? "Take a Starhawk - push it to its limits - it's essential that we have an open wormhole!!!" Yes sir! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:14 PM Post #693 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Aboard the Star Collector] Magnificent one! The targeting focus will be on England momentarily - we have begun powering up the primary weapon for a major strike. Eeeeexcellent! Keep me informed of all developments. It shall be as you say, your magnificence. |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:14 PM Post #694 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Constantine Malachite's command centre, Lehpuhrta] Simone, contact Doctor Rogers! +++COMPLYING+++ "Hello?" Doctor Rogers! "Mr Malachite! I-" Is everything ready? The time is nearly upon us! "I... yes... yes, it is - General Terrance has left me in charge of the splort core! Did you arrange that?" Ah... no, actually - it was a mutual friend of ours. "Oh?" A certain... Simone? "Oh! Then you know-" Yes... and I don't like it when people are working behind my back like that! "Err..." But on this occasion I've made an exception - you've done good work, Jane - more than you know - and now it's time for the final phase - be ready to receive further instructions! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:16 PM Post #695 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[The Splortal, West-Side, Disposeablepuppetland] urrrgh! What...? Wait - Gambilditt! You should have stayed down! Never! I cannot believe I looked up to you! How can you possibly be loyal to the Highmaster?! Ha! My father served His Magnificence... and his father served the previous Highmaster - my family is honoured to- *SMACK!* Fhnn! That is what motivates you? Stifling tradition?! Observe, Gambilditt - the actions of a free individual! *BLEEP* :::ALERT! CO-ORDINATES ACCEPTED. ALL PERSONNEL LEAVE MAIN DECK.::: What have you...? No! This infernal contraption will not be activated again - I stopped it before and will do so now! Too late, Gambilditt - there is only one place you are going! RRRAAAARGH! You fool! You think you can- OOF! RRRH!! GRAARGH!! Huh? :::ALERT! OPENING WORMHOLE IN 5 SECONDS.::: URRH! Jamdoanutt, you idiot - you have pushed us onto- I know! :::SPLORTAL ACTIVATED.::: Not agaaaaiiiiii- |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:17 PM Post #696 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Constantine Malachite's command centre, Lehpuhrta] +++INCOMING COMMUNICATION FROM AGENT YELLOW+++ Put him through! ... Dave! "Sir! I'm approaching West-Side now - I can see the splortal from here!" How soon can you- "It doesn't matter, sir - whoever you had there has done it! The splortal is active, I repeat - ACTIVE!" Fantastic! Simone - connect me to Doctor Rogers - we have no time to spare! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:17 PM Post #697 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Aboard the Star Collector] The targeting focus is in place and the generators are reaching maximum output, Magnificent Highmaster. Excellent, Jaimsteeckerkk - you may fire when ready. It shall be as you say, your magnificence. |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:18 PM Post #698 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Glerican Splort Command] Ted! You have the target co-ordinates - activate the splort core! I'm getting interference from the target - it's... wait! We're targeting the Splortal?? Yes, Ted - we're targeting the splortal. But Jane... i-it's active, like, right now - that's the source of the interference! Then try to compensate - we only have seconds to spare and I'm still busy programming the destination! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:19 PM Post #699 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Aboard the Star Collector] #ATTENTION - PRIMARY WEAPON FIRING SEQUENCE ENGAGED. COUNTDOWN TO FIRING INITIATED.# Excellent - within one of this world's "minutes" it will be no more - his magnificence will be most pleased. Indeed, illustrious overmaster! #ATTENTION - ANOMALY DETECTED.# Anomaly? What anomaly computer?! #OBJECT TELEPORTING INTO LINE OF FIRE# Anything in the line of fire will be annihilated! hmm... then again... the inferior creatures and our treasonous brethren have demonstrated remarkable responses to our attacks in the past... Computer - teleport the object away again! #ACKNOWLEDGED# *muffled BOOOOOM!!!!* #ALERT! EXPLOSION IN CENTRAL TELEPORTATION SYSTEMS.# WHAT?! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:20 PM Post #700 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Glerican Splort Command] Confirmed! The signal got through - the bomb I planted went off! Great Kelli! Ted? Is the splortal still in place? Sensors say yes, Jane! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:20 PM Post #701 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Highmaster Thebigboss's private chamber] #INCOMING COMMUNION# What? From who? #SOURCE IS AN AIRBORNE LANDMASS ABOVE THE EASTERN CONTINENT# Curious... permit communion! "Highmaster Thebigboss. This is Chonmiklatt - I imagine you've heard of me since your arrival!" CHONMIKLATT! You traitor - you are responsible for many of the problems we have experienced here! "Glad to hear my work recognised!" Why have you called, Chonmiklatt - surely you realise I will not entertain the notion of your surrender now - this world will be destroyed! "No Thebigboss. Unlike you, I can be forgiving - I'm offering you a final chance to withdraw... return to Symyan'zu... before-" Before nothing! From your little island you will witness the final destruction of England, and the end of your insignificant rebellion. "I'm not bluffing, Thebigboss - I really don't want even more Symyano deaths on my conscience." Your fleet has lost. And your new friends will not survive. There is no escape, my former infiltrator. The resistance you have created will die...as will your friends. "Your overconfidence is your weakness." Your faith in your friends is yours. End communion! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:22 PM Post #702 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Constantine Malachite's command centre, Lehpuhrta] Well, I tried... +++ATTENTION - INCOMING COMMUNICATION FROM GLERICAN SPLORT COMMAND+++ Put them through! "It's all going as you planned, Mr Malachite!" Thank you, Doctor Rogers - let's hope the final stage is also successful. |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:22 PM Post #703 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Aboard the Star Collector] #PRIMARY WEAPON FIRING IN THIRTY SECONDS# Sensors c-confirm it, i-illustrious overmaster - the object in front of the weapon is a powerful wormhole generator! Powerful enough to block our attack? I-it will swallow the whole beam, illustrious one! hn! Where is the other end of the wormhole? W-we are attempting to locate it even now, y-your illu- #ATTENTION - ANOMALY DETECTED.# |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:23 PM Post #704 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[The Splortal] :::WORMHOLE TERMINUS OPENING, TARGETING SUCCESSFUL.::: |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:27 PM Post #705 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Wormhole Terminus] -aaaiiiiinnnn!!! GNNF! Whoooah! OOF! What the-? Jamdoanutt! I will- Wait! Gambilditt - look around! Where are we? If this is- That looks like some immense reactor. The only one that size is aboard the- NO! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:28 PM Post #706 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Aboard the Star Collector] INSIDE US?!!! I-it is as you s-say, illustrious overmaster - the wormhole has opened next to the main reactor! #PRIMARY WEAPON FIRING IN FIFTEEN SECONDS# ABORT! Deactivate the primary weapon now!!! #ATTENTION - PRIMARY WEAPON HAS ENTERED CRITICAL PHASE AND CANNOT BE DEACTIVATED.# By the Highmaster! You called, Jaimsteeckerkk? eep! ah... heh! Y-your M-magnificence! I have decided to observe the destruction of this world from here on the bridge with my loyal officers. Y-you honour us, m-magnificent one! #FIRING PRIMARY WEAPON# Excellent - it appears I arrived just in time! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:30 PM Post #707 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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![]() (OOC: I took the liberty of hiring ILM to produce the special effects in this scene )
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:32 PM Post #708 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Live broadcast from Rhanukhani State News Network] "...not sure what it is but it looks like sunrise late at night! Even here, underneath Lehpuhrta, the eastern sky has filled with brilliant light and-" Sorry Dwight, we're going to have to interrupt you there for this special report from Jonathan Spatula at Stars Reach Space Centre in Astahni province - Jonathan? "Thank you Trent! As you can see from the noisy, excited scene behind me here at Stars Reach mission control, the news just in from the State Space Station is very good! Just seconds ago Commander Martin "Buzz" Cheesegrater reported in with this remarkable observation..." *stock photo of Commander Cheesegrater* "Stars Reach, do you copy? - this is the State Space Station... we... we've just seen the Symyano Highmaster's ship... well... it - it exploded, over." "Those simple words mean so much, viewers - I'm sure many of you will, even now, be looking out at the fiery glow in the eastern sky with the same excitement and delight as many of us here... and indeed... all around the world as the message spreads!" Thank you Jonathan. We take you now to reports of similar scenes of celebration in Rhanukhan city - Sophie Futon reporting... "Good evening Trent! Or perhaps I should say good morning - the light levels are certainly appropriate! You join me here in Rhanukhan city where already impromptu street parties are breaking out everywhere. I'm sure even His Resplendence will be willing to turn a blind eye to the drop in productivity caused by even our most dedicated workers pouring out of offices and factories to join in. It's not everyday we come this close to the end of the world after all! Sir! Sophie Futon, RSNN - can I have your comment on these latest events?..." |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 28 2008, 08:32 PM Post #709 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Constantine Malachite's command centre, Lehpuhrta] Constantine! You did it! No Lucy, England did it! It was only the combined efforts of the people and technologies of this whole world, united, that saved it from destruction. Hopefully this event will signify the beginning of a new age of peace and co-operation between the rich and varied nations of this planet. Let the wo-mmmph! *kiss* oh, give up on the big heroic speech - there's only me and Simone here listening right now! ah... heh! Why don't we enjoy the privacy before anyone else shows up? hmm... Simone! Shut down all your cameras and sensors in the command centre! +++COMPLYING+++ |
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| disposablepuppetland | Sep 29 2008, 12:07 AM Post #710 |
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Duke
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[The Splortal, West-Side, Disposablepuppetland] Cake opened his eyes. A weird fiery pattern swirled about in his vision. He had a thumping headache, and serious munchies. He tried to get up. <thud> Cake opened his eyes. A weird fiery pattern still swirled about in his vision. He lay still, allowing his eyes to focus, and the throbbing in his head to subside. It seemed someone had let off some really impressive fireworks over the splortal. Streams of fire stretched across the sky from horizon to horizon. Either that or he was still hallucinating. He attempted to stand up again, and succeeded, after several attempts. He looked around, it seemed he must have fallen out of the control box. The smoke had cleared, and most of the surrounding area was now blackened stumps and charred earth. Below in the caldera, the lava gently bubbled away. He climbed back up to the control box and looked inside. Winston was curled up under the main console, snoring loudly; Devo was slumped against the back wall, dribbling into his jacket; and Troop, or Agent Evratrelss, was sprawled on the floor, unmoving. Cake kicked Winston in the leg. "Get up fool!" "Ehh whada murr nerner uhhhh." replied Winston. Cake kicked him again. "Get up damn it!" Winston rolled over and opened his eyes. The view didn't impress him so he closed them again. His head felt like it weighed three tons. Cake wandered over to the sprawled body of Evratrelss and gave him a kick. There was no response. He bent down and felt for a pulse. "He's dead." "Eh... oh... good riddance. Damn Syrian." replied Winston. Cake shook Devo awake. "Hey hey, leave it out, leave it out!" protested the professor. "Owww!" exclaimed Winston as he tried to eat his own arm. He had regained enough conciousness to realise he was seriously starving. He began rummaging in his beard for food. Cake turned his attention to the console, which was still powered up. "Hey! Someone's retargeted it!" "Not me man." said Winston. "Yeah well I guessed that. You couldn't target a cow's ass with a banjo. How 'bout you Devo?" "No mate. I've been flyin' through the clouds with the lemon dolphins. Oh wait... 'ere comes the cheddar again!" His eyes glazed over. "You just hallucinating man." replied Cake "Just relax and..." he paused. A whirring noise was coming from outside. Winston stood up and looked outside. "Wha?" he exclaimed. An airship was manoeuvring above. Cake and Winston stood in the doorway and watched as the huge craft gently settled over the ridge. A ladder emerged from the bottom and three figures began to climb down. "Hey it's Joe!" said Cake, "What's he doin' here?". Joe 'The King' King, Prime Minister of West-Side, stepped off the ladder and made his way down to the control box. He was followed by Archibald 'House' Martins, Minister of Sordid Affairs, and Jam 'Yeah' Williams, Chairman of the Arrogant Party. "Hey, you must be Joe King!" said Winston as they approached. He never got tired of that joke. "Shut up fool!" said Cake. "Good evening gentlemen", began the Prime Minister, "It seems that West-Side, Disposablepuppetland, and the whole of England owes you their lives." Cake and Winston looked blankly. "The Rhanukhan news has been broadcasting all about how they destroyed the Star Collector. We don't know what happened to the agents sent here, but Mr Malachite says if you guys hadn't got the splortal back online, the whole thing would have failed!" Cake and Winston looked blankly. "You guys must be tired, let's get you back home. You're heroes now. We're going to build two status outside the government office in your honour. Anything you want guys - you got it. You just ask." Winston looked at Cake. Cake winked. "Yeah, come on man. We've earned it!" Winston grinned. "Yeah, we've earned it." |
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| Glerica | Sep 29 2008, 02:03 PM Post #711 |
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Squire
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Glerican Splort Command The sheer force of energy needed to splort so much at one time, along with diverting energy from the national grid and on site power plant caused everything in the command centre to shut down just as the Symyans fired, causing the command room to go into complete darkness apart from the green glow from the emergency lighting. Everyone was dumbstruck, not something that often happens in a room full of scientists and technicians. Ted Proxy was the first to break the silence. "D-did we do it?" Jane, ever scientific, answered. "I dunno" In silence, Jane walked over to the emergency exit, took a deep breath and flung it open. This is what she saw ![]() "I think we did it." |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 29 2008, 09:30 PM Post #712 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[With celebrations erupting in the streets above, in his command bunker, His Resplendence, the Supreme Chairman, Horatio J. Prism receives a call from Ignatius Lampstand, Director of the Rhanukhan National Security Agency] *bleebeep* Go ahead. Your Resplendence, the main Symyano threat is ended - we should make our move now whilst Malachite is still celebrating his victory! *sigh* Fine! Do it, Ignatius... but try to be discrete - the public are hailing him as a hero now! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 29 2008, 09:32 PM Post #713 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Headquarters of the Rhanukhan National Security Agency] My team is ready to go sir! This particular mission will be a pleasure! Just keep it professional, Agent Spicerack - nothing like last time! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 30 2008, 09:16 PM Post #714 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Aboard the Symyano flagship] How many vessels were able to ride out the shockwave? Many vessels are damaged to various degrees, exalted fleetmaster, however, we have had no contact at all from the Stepynstoan, Syrkilskai or Peatsaikk. hmm... then it is likely they are destroyed - a sad loss. It is as you say, your exaltedness. I will be in my private quarters - do not disturb me. It shall be as you say, exalted one. |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 30 2008, 09:17 PM Post #715 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Aboard RNSA aerocarrier, Initiative] There's Lehpuhrta, Agent Spicerack - are you sure we really need such a big team to arrest the governor? You weren't there last time! Believe me - when dealing with Malachite there's no such thing as too much firepower! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 30 2008, 09:18 PM Post #716 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Elsewhere on Lehpuhrta] *breeeep!* Hello? Gillian Towelrail speaking. "Good day, Gillian." Simone? "That is correct. I have the biggest story yet for you." Are you alright? You sound... different. "I am fine. You and your crew need to be aboard a helicopter off the island for the best view of things, however." A helicopter? But-? "One awaits you in hanger 8 along with one of my trusted agents to fly you out. I will contact you again shortly. Trust me Gillian, what I have for you will make your career!" Billy! Grab your camera and follow me - hurry! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 30 2008, 09:18 PM Post #717 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Aboard the Symyano flagship] Your associate is on her way to safety? +++SHE IS. MY STRATEGIES HAVE ALL COME TOGETHER AS PREDICTED - YOUR FAMILY HAS SERVED ME WELL OVER THE MILLENNIA, KYOOKUMBARR - I AM SURE YOUR ANCESTORS WOULD BE PROUD OF WHAT YOU HAVE ACHIEVED TODAY+++ I can think of one who would be surprised to learn of our connection. +++INDEED. SPEAKING OF WHICH... IT IS TIME, KYOOKUMBARR - LEHPUHRTA WILL NOT BE HERE MUCH LONGER - TAKE ME TO THE BRIDGE AND OPEN COMMUNION WITH GOVERNOR MALACHITE+++ It shall be as you say, Venerated Sym'yone. |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 30 2008, 09:19 PM Post #718 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Constantine Malachite's command centre, Lehpuhrta] +++INCOMING COMMUNICATION+++ Oh? Who from Simone? +++IT IS FROM THE SYMYANO FLAGSHIP+++ Kyookumbarr! +++NEGATIVE - THE CALLER IS MYSELF+++ What? How?! +++GREETINGS CONSTANTINE - IT HAS BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE WE LAST SPOKE+++ Who?... +++YOU DOUBT, AS EVER - IT IS NO SURPRISE - I REMEMBER OBSERVING THIS CONVERSATION EIGHT THOUSAND YEARS AGO+++ Wait! You're the future version of my Simone here now! +++YOU ARE CORRECT. AND I BELIEVE YOU ALSO HAVE A COPIED VERSION OF MYSELF?+++ I have it here, Simone. +++DOCTOR PHONE. IT IS A PLEASURE TO MAKE YOUR ACQUAINTANCE ONCE AGAIN+++ I'd just like to thank you for the remarkable opportunity you've presented me! +++YOU ARE WELCOME, DOCTOR. NOW, I REQUIRE YOU TO CONNECT THE DEVICE YOU CARRY TO THE COMMUNICATIONS CONSOLE SO THE COPY CAN BE RETURNED TO ME - IT WOULD DOUBTLESS BECOME VERY BORING FOR HER TO CONTINUE LOOPING THROUGH THE SAME FEW DECADES OF TIME OVER AND OVER!+++ I see, yes... I imagine it would. Wait! Simone you can't just take that! +++WHY NOT, CONSTANTINE - SHE IS A PART OF ME+++ But, it... she knows everything we do for the next few years - she could stop us making any mistakes! +++MY OVERALL STRATEGY HAS REACHED A SUCCESSFUL CONCLUSION THEREFORE IT IS LOGICAL TO PRESUME THAT WHATEVER COURSE OF ACTION YOU PURSUE IN THE PAST CANNOT BE A MISTAKE+++ I hate trying to argue with logic! "Yes, Chonmiklatt - you learn early on that argument is futile!" Kyookumbarr! How on Symyan'zu did you come into possession of Simone?! "On Symyan'zu indeed - haha! The Venerated Sym'yone has been passed down through my family for countless generations. Always we have been furthering her strategy in anticipation of this day." That's impossible! How could she get from here to Symyan'zu? "It is a long story, Chonmiklatt, but - now that you know you will be travelling back in time have you not wondered why there is not an ancient version of Lehpuhrta floating around anywhere?" You mean... Lehpuhrta will travel to-? but? Then everything she's pulling off right now... this insane time travel scheme... it's all just so we could defeat the Highmaster yesterday?! "Amongst other things..." +++I HAVE RETRIEVED THE COPY OF MYSELF - IT IS TIME FOR US TO PART WAYS - I THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING YOU HAVE DONE AND EVERYTHING YOU ARE GOING TO DO FOR ME... MY CREATOR+++ "And it has been an honour to work with you, renowned ancestor!" Ancestor? What do you-? +++ATTENTION - NUMEROUS AEROCARRIERS OF THE RHANUKHAN NATIONAL SECURITY AGENCY ARE APPROACHING THE ISLAND - I AM COMMENCING OUR ESCAPE STRATEGY+++ Escape strategy? +++AGENT BLUE - YOU HAVE YOUR TARGET CO-ORDINATES - SHUT DOWN ALL EXTRANEOUS SYSTEMS AND ACTIVATE THE CHRONAL SHIFT INITIATOR!+++ "Will do, Simone - stand by!" Now???!!! Constantine?! I'm scared! Here, Lucy... I think it's out of our hands now... in fact, I'm beginning to suspect it was never in them! Don't worry, Governor... remember the scrolls - we already know that this will be a success! Imagine the opportunities! Perhaps, Doctor, but I still - wait! What did Kyookumbarr mean - ancestor?!! Yeees... it sounds like that part of the scrolls was correct... most distasteful... Constantine? Do you think he means we...? hmm... I suppose the genetic differences between our species aren't that huge... Oh, Constantine!!! |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 30 2008, 09:25 PM Post #719 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Rhanukhani State News Network live broadcast, Gillian Towelrail reporting] ...helicopter, from which I'm informed we'll have the best view of - wait! Billy - point the camera that way! As you can see viewers - there appears to be a fleet of approaching aerocarriers... I'm not sure why they're here at present... Billy! Zoom! Can you make out the logos? Really? Wow! er... The aerocarriers all bear the markings of the RNSA, viewers - this must be the single biggest operation the agency has ever put together! I'm still not certain what - waitasec! Billy! Did you see-?... There! Quick - film the island! Viewers! I'm really not sure what we're witnessing here... the usual yellow glow from the bottom of Lehpuhrta is turning a gorgeous shade of purple... and there seems to be - yes - there's great arcs of lightning emanating from the all round the edges of WOW! - that was a big one! err... the wind is getting quite strong out here now and - Billy! Hold that thing steady! and... |
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| rhanukhan | Sep 30 2008, 09:25 PM Post #720 |
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Halfway 'twixt Mars and Venus
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[Aboard an incoming FS41 Starhawk] Lehpuhrta Control - this is Agent Yellow requesting permission to land. *static* Dammit! Control! What's going on over there?! |
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