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the stupid owner guy
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hey. so. i'm posting chapters of the plasma rewrite here. rate em and give suggestions and shit.
here's half of chapter 1.
Chapter 1 June Twentieth, 4:00 P.M. Castle of the Mind. A floating being, made entirely of a green jelly-like substance, ten floating jelly-like discs around it’s body, a golden crown on top of where it’s head should be, was on a violet and golden throne, the throne covered in symbols of the brain and pen. It’s mind was calculating every possible outcome for the closest holiday, one of the few days without tension between the kingdom of the Enlightened, and the kingdom of the Emboldened: The National Peace Festival. The festival had been formed, many years ago, by previous monarchs, to celebrate the removal of humanity from the other races. The festival was full of games, merchants, competitions, and sharing. “My liege,” A knight, one that was a humanoid praying mantis in steel armor, came up to the jelly creature, the creature looking at the knight with an acknowledging gaze, it’s language being too complex for most of the races to understand. “What shall the Royal Guard do during the festival, sir?” The mantis asked, his antennae twitching, anxiously. The jelly creature formed a long wire-like appendage, connecting the guard’s head with the creature’s body. “Command: Arrive at the festival with no armor, conceal all weapons.” The mantis spoke, the creature forcing it to speak, so it could understand the command. The appendage transformed back into the discs, orbiting around the jelly-being, as the mantis nodded. “Yes, my liege. It shall be done right away.” The mantis went off, to alert the rest of the guards to the creature’s bidding. The festival was tomorrow, allowing much more planning to be prepared. The creature did not expect the Emboldened to arrive peacefully, nor did it expect peace from any sort of rogues. It brought the discs close, them whispering their own opinions on the matter, to the amalgamated being that served as the body. The discs attached themselves to the jelly creature, and changed their color and shape, giving the jelly being a less terrifying appearance, with black marble-like eyes, tiny green arms and legs, and a red horizontal slit, to give it the illusion of a mouth. This was the appearance that the entire kingdom of the Emboldened, and the regular citizens of the Enlightened, believed that their monarch truly had. June Twentieth, 4:00 P.M., Castle of the Strong. A large red dinosaur, with a golden crown, gems replaced with fangs from previous monarchs, a sword made of solid gold reinforced with titanium, a wispy white beard growing from his chin, was sitting on a very large crimson and golden throne. He was thinking of plans for the upcoming National Peace Festival, stroking his beard, visions of violence dancing in his mind. The only other being in the room was the dinosaur’s butler, a living tree, in a suit and bowtie. “Butler!” The dinosaur roared, a twinkle of amusement in his eye, watching the tree jump and scramble. “Y-yes, my lord?!” The butler stammered, easily terrified by the dinosaur’s temper, and strength. “I’ve been thinking of plans for the festival, lately. It is nearly upon us, and I do not know if I trust that disgusting alien of a leader,” He paced around the room, his colossal feet creating loud, booming sounds, loud enough that half of the castle’s residents would be able to hear him, were it not for the soundproofing magic the more magical residents had employed, for this very reason. A curl of orange fire came out of his nose, as the dinosaur snorted, amused by an idea that had just popped into his head. “Get me the captain of the guard.” He ordered, as the butler rushed off, to please his lord. “...I’ve got a plan.” The colossal dinosaur muttered to himself, laughing under his breath, rubbing his golden broadsword for good luck. The captain of the guard, a green humanoid crocodile, with camouflage paint covering all of his body, throwing knives laced with a sleeping toxin sheathed in his belt. “You wished to see me, my lord?” The crocodile asked, panting nervously, his tiny black eyes constantly surveying the room for spies. “Yes, I did…” The dinosaur let go of his broadsword, grinning with the thought of how genius his plan was. “I have a plan so smart, so devious, so… Intelligent, that it’d even put that jelly monster to shame!” He boomed, fire curling out of his nostrils from his excitement. “You and the other guards are to still come to the festival, but none of you wear any armor! Hide all your weapons under regular clothes, and don’t bring any that are too large!” The dinosaur grinned, half of his entire skull seeming to be made of teeth, now, his two largest fangs being made of what appeared to be pure gold, with a red gem in the center of both of them. The crocodile saluted, a faint smile appearing on his face, “Yes, my lord! It shall be done right away! The Enlightened won’t know what hit them!” The crocodile ran off, to alert the guards of the plan, as the dinosaur sat down, in his throne. He unsheathed his golden broadsword, looking at his reflection in it’s shine, and reached underneath his throne. He pulled out the red gem in the center of the blade’s hilt, and replaced it with a rune that had a Greek Omega symbol etched into it, causing the blade to slightly glow green. “Let’s see that bastard try anything suspicious, now that all of the guards will be there…” The dinosaur muttered, his grin slowly diminishing into a smirk of pride. June Twentieth, 4:30 P.M., The Realm of Eternal Night. A black-skinned imp had been looking into a purple, glowing, crystal ball, observing the two monarchs create their almost identical plans. The imp’s exceptionally long mouth spread into a grin, his hundreds of sharp, small, white fangs clashing with one another, as if a battle for dominance was waging in his mouth. “Whorenet, get a load of this!” The imp cackled, tossing the crystal to a human-sized dark bee, with an abnormally large abdomen and stinger, slight protrusions from her chest, not unlike the breast of mammals. The bee quickly caught it, her white eyes glaring daggers back at the mischief-filled imp. “Would you stop with the name calling, ‘O glorious leader’?” She retorted, looking into the crystal, her voice dripping with enough sarcasm to fill an entire bathtub. The ball had rewinded, giving the bee a look at what the two kings had just planned. “...Those idiots, their plans are exactly the same, and neither of them are original!” She threw the imp the ball back, her long, sharp mandibles reflecting the light, giving them the appearance of two poisoned daggers in her jaw. The imp caught it, and placed it inside of a slot inside of a black warhammer, twice the size of his small body, the crystal giving his hammer a faint purple aura, almost as if the shadows of the dead themselves were helping this hammer crush the weak. “But, they’re not the worst plans, my short-minded partner.” The imp taunted the bee, his jaw seemingly in a permanent grin from his tomfoolery, as he hefted the warhammer over his shoulder, his small arms able to hold the heavy warhammer easily. “They’re so unoriginal, that it makes them original! Nobody’s going to fall for the oldest trick in the book, so nobody tries them.” The imp’s forked tongue licked his lips, his thoughts going to devouring the flesh of the citizens in tomorrow’s festival. “Therefore, the oldest trick, has become the newest trick!” He cackled, falling backwards from hysteria, the hammer turning a pebble that was nearby into just a cloud of dust particles. The bee hovered over to the imp, smacking him hard enough that his head was forced to turn to the side, scraping his giant black ears on the stone he was lying on. “Calm yourself, you moron.” The bee ordered, her stinger dripping with a dark poison it was permanently laced with. “That green… Thing, won’t be fooled by the trick so easily, and the giant buffoon is smart enough to know his war strategies. They’ll see the plan, and then they’ll… Begin fighting…” Her voice trailed off, as she realized the imp’s scheme, the imp cackling, his eyes shimmering brighter, with amusement. “I knew you had a bit of brain in you!” The imp exclaimed, grinning, his fangs glistening from the faint glow the crystal inside of his hammer gave off. “Now, help me out a bit.” The imp’s grin faded, his expression turning deadly serious, his teeth now hidden by his black shadow-like flesh. “We’re going to be preparing spheres of darkness to fire into the festival, all night. We won’t need to bring any soldiers, if we have enough.” The imp’s grin returned, proud of his ingenious plot, to bring the two kingdoms to their knees, with just two people. June Twenty-First, 3:00 P.M., The Lucid Opal Plains. The Festival was almost ready for the public. Merchants, entertainers, and contest hosts had been setting up their stands and contests for three hours, now, determined to snag the best spots that potential customers would be around. A humanoid gecko, with blue scales, with one large black eye, a fake [COLOR] glass eye in his other socket, and a long white scarf wrapped around his mouth, was sitting on the grass. He was watching the people set up their tourist traps, his pink tongue licking his lips, fantasizing about the delicious food he could purchase from the stands, in the near future. He reached his hand into his right pocket, feeling the longsword hilt he always kept with himself, in case he needed to threaten somebody, with the bluff that it was either an invisible sword, or a sword made of magic.
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bokay
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and on a different note, to fuck with you, here's chapter one of the shade gorcha two-best-customers novella.
Spoiler: click to toggle Chapter One Marchville is a quiet town, out in practically the middle of nowhere. The town caps at just 100 occupants total, a gas station or two here and there, a convenience store, exactly what you'd expect from a small town. In a small bar, near the town square, named Kraken's Juice, a pale man with a gray hoodie, and black pants, the hood pulled up, was sitting next to a man with a pumpkin for a head, wearing a black, faded, trenchcoat and black pants, an axe imprint on the back of the trenchcoat. A mini-kraken, a little larger than an adult, with orange skin, slithered over to them, on the other side of the bar. “Shade! Gorcha! My two best customers! What can ol' Kraken get for ya, today?” He'd ask the two, as the pale man looked at him. “I'll take a cup of sheep blood, like normal.” He'd tell Kraken, pointing at himself with a gray-gloved hand. “Coming right up, Shade! And, Gorcha? What will the man who still has to pay his tab be having, tonight?” Kraken responded, looking at the pumpkin-headed man. “I'll just have a shot of whiskey, like usual, Kraken. And, I'll pay my tab... Later.” Gorcha grinned, his pumpkin-mouth opened wide. “Sure, sure…” Kraken muttered, and slithered away, to get their drinks. “...Life's real boring, Gorcha… Nothing to do each day. Just work at my dull office, all day, every day...” Shade muttered, loud enough for Gorcha to hear. “Well… Get a hobby. Seriously. I've got a great one, it-” “I know, I know, you've already told me… And I don't think turning animals into more headless is a good hobby for me. If anything, I'd make them into more vampires.” Shade pointed out. “But that just… Doesn't appeal to me. At all. I mean, it's not fun to bite things, and see them in pain for a bit.” He'd continue. “Well… Figure SOMETHING out. Since I don't need you being all depressed and emo and stuff. It'll start to bring me down, too, if you're down, y'know?” Gorcha said. “Oh, hey, here's our drinks.” He'd point out. Kraken handed them their drinks, his eye slightly twitching at Gorcha. “Here you are, gentleman, and Gorcha.” “Thanks.” They'd say in unison, as Gorcha downed his whiskey, Shade sipping from his glass of blood, slowly. A lich walked into the bar, and sat on a bar stool, on the other side of Shade. He had on a purple cloak, and a purple hood, with a skeletal body.
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