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| Wake Up | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: 17 Nov 2009, 11:18 PM (338 Views) | |
| cheesebug | 17 Nov 2009, 11:18 PM Post #1 |
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Ultimate Threadkiller
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Here's a short story that I literally wrote in less than five minutes for a late homework assignment. I decided it was pretty readable for homework, so here it is. Wake Up A Short Story Chapter 1 But it was just a dream. Writers use this, to make someone realize how good something is. Or how bad something is. Sometimes they use it to shock you. The main character is falling, and finally, she realizes who she really is. But then, suddenly, she hits the ground. And maybe you are surprised, maybe tears are springing to your eyes. But then you read the next sentence- But it was just a dream. But in my case, just a dream can be just a nightmare. Chapter 2 I told them again, I said to them, "I feel in dreams." Laughing. I said, "I'm serious." I said, "What do I do?" "See a psychiatrist." they replied, still laughing. That sound, that sound coming from their mouths, the usually happy sound, was tinted with mockery. That mockery tore my fragile state, shattered it, shattered it into thousands of tiny pieces, like the pieces of glass on my floor, that are always there when I wake up. Chapter 3 The key in dreams is to wake up before you hit the ground. For years, that's what I told mysef. And, to wake up in a dream, you merely close your eyes. So every time I ended up there, there on the cliff above a shining ocean, not in real, every day life, I would say, "Just close your eyes." I asked my "friends" if they ever had repetitive dreams like mine, but they shook their heads, shook their heads and looked at me like I was crazy. I realized, that if I feel pain in dreams, and I kept having this dream, this dream that could never end, for my own sake, God must be out to kill me. Chapter 4 They ask, they ask with worry in their tone, "What happened to your arm this time?" And I would look at it, as if surprised, surprised like I had forgotten it was there. And I would say, covering my raw scratches with a cut up hand, "I don't know." Because how could I tell thm it came from a hit and run, or a skydiving accident in a mystical world, or from the whipping of a thousand plants as I fell from the sky, off a tall sea cliff that screamed that I was still alive. Chapter 5 I woke up with seven bruises, seven bruises all in a row. There was a small scratch, right above the third bruise. So I stepped around the fresh glass, this time from a photo, a family photo, a family photo ripped in half, and crept to I put a bandaid on my cut, and decided this was ridiculous. That night, in my dreams, I met a man, in a field, who could smell emotions, and tell the way the wind would blow. He couldn't promise me a life, but he could promise me an extra day, because he would not hurt me, as long as I agreed to keep up my confidence. I never saw him, the man with the promises of life and encouragement, ever again. Chapter 6 At school, they said, right there in class, the world was scary. They said the only place they could feel safe was in their dreams. I almost argued, because to me, the world is kindergarten compared to the profanities that can happen in my dreams. Chapter 7 I was there. There, on the very cliff of my dreams. Accept this time, it was real. This time, I did not fight the wind, thinking it would have the power to blow me off the cliff like a leaf. But I also did not fight the push, the friendly push, the push that you shouldn't care about and playfully push back. Because I did not push back, I fell. There was a scream, and I was falling, falling just like I did in my dreams, accept this time, I couldn't just blink, just shut my eyes and make it go away. But I still tried as I fell closer to the sandy beach. Chapter 8 Right before I hit the ground, a miracle, a living miracle happened. Before death, the wind swept me up, as if I had wings, and I went up, up above the ocean, the ocean that always symbolized more than just water to me. I spread my arms, and took flight, and I was finally safe. But it was just a dream. Edited by cheesebug, 17 Apr 2010, 12:26 AM.
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http://masochistic-goddess.tumblr.com/poetry "You will hear thunder and remember me, and think: she wanted storms." | |
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| Concolor | 18 Nov 2009, 05:51 AM Post #2 |
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Barabbas
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Wow, that was really cool! I'm impressed cheezy ![]() I really like how you use "But it was just a dream." not only to establish a central theme, but also to use it as a eh...an "indicator of things to come" (the Norwegian word is "frampek", I don't know the English one). At first I was really confused by the first chapter as a kind of breaking of the fourth wall, but I really think it worked well with the ending making it a full circle. I really think it has a lot of depth and meaning. My favorite part is the one I find to me the most enigmatic (like a riddle one does not have the answer to) is "The main character is falling, and finally, she realizes who she really is." Cool
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Life is beautiful, love heals, people come through. Reason, compassion and love comes first. Everything else is secondary. Except for Skittles. - And emperor Cheezy!
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| cheesebug | 9 Jun 2010, 02:41 PM Post #3 |
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Ultimate Threadkiller
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thanx!
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http://masochistic-goddess.tumblr.com/poetry "You will hear thunder and remember me, and think: she wanted storms." | |
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| Midst Of Vampy | 10 Jun 2010, 07:15 PM Post #4 |
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Barabbas
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That is so true, you don't even know... |
| TIMEY-WHIMEY SKITTLES! | |
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12:49 PM Jul 11