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Posted Image We choose to go with Ranger difficulty, sounds like it'll provide us with decent challenge. The game has been balanced to be more difficult since the beta, back when I played it on seasoned it was ridiculously easy, so this'll be a change of pace.
The opening video plays, setting the stage for the beginning of the game, Vargas and the other rangers are attending the funeral of Ace, a ranger who was killed by unknown assailants, the same year he was set to retire. We are called to the funeral as Vargas has tasked us with finding out what happened to Ace, as well as completing his mission of installing repeater units into the radio towers. We might know more about what exactly that means but we opt to skip through the dialogue, pressing goodbye prompts Vargas to chew you out on trying to leave without knowing where we're even going. He marks our map, showing us where the first radio tower, and Ace's murder site, should be. Posted Image
Posted Image "A shovel, this might come in handy."
Posted Image "No reason to leave that hide for the worms, not when we can tan it and make use of it."
Posted Image "I'm selective when it comes to respect for the dead, no argument here."
Posted Image DL Waits for Vargas to finish before attempting to dig the spot again.
Posted Image Last warning, Recruits! Do not touch Ace's grave again!"
The rest of the group wrestle DL away from the grave. Posted Image"There's a time and a place for dealing with these rangers mate, this ain't it."
DL forgets the grave digging and the party moves on down the path, we head towards the ranger citadel, where we're greeted by a dreadlock wearing nigger with a welding helmet. As we approach he tells us that we aren't allowed access to the citadel just yet. Posted ImageRocko insists Nack talk to him as they are both niggers, the party agrees that he has the highest chance of success.
Posted Image"Good to see you, recruits. Afraid I can't open this door for you yet."
Posted Image"Nice try, recruits, but it won't get you through this door. I like your sass, though. Tell you what. I know you wanna get inside so you can get your hands on the good stuff Melson's got waiting for you in the Armory. Well, I got a little toy that just might tide you over. Interested?
Giebetz hands Nack a pistol, before he can inspect it Tonka interrupts:
Posted Image"Move away from the door. We're coming in whether you like it or not."
Posted Image"Keep making threats like that and I'm liable to take you serious. Believe me, you don't want me to take you serious."
Tonka backs down;muttering under his breath: Posted Image"Fucking nigger.." He decides he'll make fun of niggers later over the internet to vent.
The party inspects the gun, it's pretty useless to Nack, Tonka decides to pocket it, although the effectiveness of a shotgun pistol is questionable. Posted Image
The party moves on across the bridge and stops at a supply depot, we inquire about being outfitted, since a dangerous mission is probably easier to complete if we're alive.
After the cpl. tells us we aren't going to be given any freebies we start looking through the stock for shit to buy. Posted Image Tonka sells his power fist as unarmed was a fucking stupid tag skill that only exists as a reference to kyle's faggy drawing. He also decides to sell the rest of DL's cigs, DL objects, but Nack insists that Posted Image"Cigarettes are bad for your health and more importantly your complexion." Posted Image Rocko laments that he is disgustingly greyed and hideous despite not being a regular smoker.
Tonka sees a slick leather jacket and attempts to buy it, but cannot into math and realizes they'll have to come back when they have more scrap. Posted Image
DL's eyes dart to the dynamite cache Posted Image"Imagine the kind of destruction we could cause with those.." he says, his eyes glowing with excitement. Unfortunately they're far too costly, we promise DL we'll come back for them, but secretly are pleased that he won't accidentally our limbs because we were dumb enough to arm him with explosives.
For whatever reason there's a goat standing between the exit and us, one of the recruits sitting on a board by it, insist we pick up a can for them. DL eyes the goat and goes over to it, he uses his animal whisperer skill to whisper into it's ears. Who knows quite what DL whispered to the goat, but it began following soon after he was done.
DL insisted that he would Posted Image"Fuck that goat like it were a roo in heat." Posted ImageRocko looks on wistfully, wondering why a supreme gentleman like him doesn't attract the adoration of fine goats like that. The goat followed after DL as we walked towards the gate, DL gained a bonus of +1 awareness from the trait "devil eyes" -Square pupils don't miss a thing.-
Before we leave DL decides to do some digging with the shovel, he runs along wagging his tongue sniffing for various spots to dig. We find various caches of things such as: Various ammo scrap a Glass eye and a library card
While digging the last spot we run into an aged ginger slut bawling her eyes out over the loss of Ace. Posted Image We ask her what she's on about, Posted Imageand Rocko insists that she has nothing to cry about, as his life "is a living torment". She ignores him as any rational female would, and continues explaining the different positions in which her and ace used to fuck. At the end of her droning she asked if she could tag along with us to try and find Ace's killer.
Posted Image "We'll have something to fuck if the goat gets tired." Posted Image".. That's disgusting... Sex with a woman..." Nack shakes his head Posted Image "I want her to hold me like a baby while I suck on her wrinkled teats." Posted Image "I don't really like whites, least of all gingers, least of all ginger sluts, but we'll take her along, she might make good use as cannon fodder."
Everyone was agreed and we set off towards the exit of the ranger camp. About damn time..
(Now IT REALLY gets started... )
Too many people have opinions on things they know nothing about. And the more ignorant they are, the more opinions they have.
We finally get out of those fucking citadel gates, and into the Wasteland. First view of the travelling map, we're ready to go. Vargas calls on the radio to confirm our objective again. Posted Image
after a ways of travelling we stop be an oasis to refill our canteens, we avoid the irradiated zones, detectable by the ticking of our gieger counters. Posted Image
We enter the location, there's a blood trail, still fresh, probably Ace's. We search around and find his ranger star in some bushes Posted Image
Posted Image "Jesus. That's Ace's star. How did it end up way the hell over here?"
We continue on down a wide pass between some rock formations and stumble on a pile of corpses. Posted Image"You think they're still fresh?" DL asks, touching his fingers to the lips of one of the dead women. Posted Image "Careful DL, you'll make your goat Jealous." DL takes heed, and lets the corpse flop back down. Posted Image "She's no good anymore anyway." Posted ImageRocko waves to the corpse as the rest of us continue on, the corpse is distinterested. Posted Image
We find the group who were likely responsible for the wastelanders rotting back by the pass a couple of feet ahead. They tell us to go back the way we came, with a fixation mostly on nack. Posted Image
We decide to go around as they "asked", they were all armed and had decent numbers, we had our orders, and nobody cared enough to avenge some dead cunts.
Nack tiptoes around the corpses, making sure not to step on anything gross.
We took the left and found a guard with a pack of dogs and a gate, the radio tower was right behind them. Tonka threatened to kill them and eat their dog. Posted Image Posted Image "I could go for some dog.." Posted Image
the dogfuckers puss out and let us by.
We run up to the radio and make Rocko do his chink magic.
We begin looting the area around the bandit camp, finding more ammo, scrap, and an smg noone will ever use, and of interest: A metal leg. Angela gets all hot and bothered about it but no one else really gives a shit. Posted Image
We enter a cave to the left of the guard and his dog, it's somewhat spacious, inside we see a toaster surrounded by a pillar of light. A moment of confusion and silence; Posted Image "don't worry, I know how to deal with this." DL approaches the toaster, and then shoves his floppy dick inside of it, he wiggles it around a bit until the toaster clicks, and then pops, a can of spray paint lay on the ground, which DL loots., -
James critically succeeded when using Toaster repair.- Posted Image His dick is pretty much burned off in the process, but he insists that Posted Image "It'll grow back."
Behind the defiled toaster lies a shitty backer statue. We approach it and it mysteriously gives us +1 skill points and some description about something. We pretend it wasn't there, because dumb. Posted Image
We leave the cave and follow the blood trail up towards the back of the raider camp, we take a right and go up on the flank of the first bandits we encountered, we see a hill that's not only overlooking the bandits, but also has a couple of storage boxes on it. Of course it happens to be behind a locked gate, and none of us know how to lockpick. Although Rocko is convinced that Nack is simply holding out on us. DL randomly decides to check the gate for explosive traps. We move out of his radius as to not be caught in it if he fucks up. His intuition is correct and he manages to disarm the trap on the gate. Which is fucking worthless as we still have no capacity to pick the lock. Posted Image
We stand around, feeling pretty down about the whole thing. Posted Image "This gate makes me feel like a piece of shit; I might kill myself." Angela nudges Rocko out of the way and begins kicking down the gate. Posted Image "Let me show you how it's done faggots." She breaks the gate down, it is alpha as fuck, Rocko tries in vain to conceal his erection. Posted Image
We go up onto the ridge and towards the ammunition crates, DL insists there is another bomb, and gets to work on disarming it. He fails to detect or disarm and traps. Following in the footsteps of Angela he opts to kick the box, the trap explodes, it's pretty bloody, but DL is al'right, and everyone had a good laugh at his expense. Posted Image
We loot the crates and move on to the top of the ridge, which gives us a nice view of the bandits with their backs turned. A perfect oppurtinity for an ambush. Posted Image"Let's Kill ever last one of them." Posted Image "Don't you worry my friend, we will, we'll get the objective and come back here to split some heads." DL nods and we continue on after the trail towards the objective. Posted Image
We reach the absolute back of the mountainous wall and enter another cave, this one's larger and darker than the last. We head in deeper and loot some containers. Posted Image
After turning a corner we spot A HUGE FUCKING TOAD. Which isn't a big deal to DL, as he has experience dealing with HUGE FUCKING TOADS. Posted Image"Come on Bitch toad!"
Our first taste of battle in this wasteland. Everyone in the party is brimming with confidence, we're gonna slaughter this fucking toad. Angela takes the first shot, hitting the toad with her high powered rifle. It does a measly 3 damage out of his 60 health, managing to barely pierce his thick hide. Posted Image
The tremendous toad hops towards us before turning to face Angela. Angela takes her turn to put distance between her and the toad so her shots aren't disrupted. Posted Image
Posted Image"I've got something for you!" DL says excitedly as he runs up to the toad and tries to ram his knife up it's arse. It's not very effective. Posted Image
Nack fires his laser, it hits once but I have no capture, his second shot embarrassingly misses, but it still looks cool:
He retreats back towards the entrance a bit to get away from the toad, as toads cause warts, and: Posted Image "Warts are not cute."
Tonka flanks the toad and swings his blade at it, hacking into the toad's hide, doing a measly 5 damage. Posted Image
Rocko rushes the toad and gets the other flank, using his samurai skills he stabs it for 6 damage. Posted Image The toad is unamused with Rocko's bullshit and decides to slap the shit out of him for 22 damage. Posted Image
The toad sends out it's formidable tongue like a battering ram, pounding tonka in the gut for 24 damage, the heavy hit makes him double over, vomiting blood, the pain is real. At this point the boys have the toad completely surrounded,they proceed to bash it for the next couple of turns. Posted Image
Nack takes knee, a position he is very familiar with, he cringes at the idea of dirt getting on his pants, but decides it's necessary, he takes the shot. His phase blaster does a devastating 10 points of damage, he was impressed with himself, and thought the blast looked really pretty: Posted Image
Tonka took some pain pills for his earlier wound and opted to get the fuck up out of there before the toad took him out. Posted Image
Just as tonka made a run for it the toad launched it's tongue again, it managed to hit DL, smashing through his stomach, mortally wounding him. The trauma of the penetrating blow causes DL to fall to the ground in an ever growing pool of blood. Posted ImageDL's goat looks on in horror as DL lies bleeding Posted Image
Angela takes one last shot, her bullets rip into the toad's skull, killing it instantly. Posted Image
Nack rushed to DL's side, Posted Image but his field medic skills were not enough to stop the bleeding and deal with the severe wound. He quickly looks into his surgery manual while trying to get a medic on the radio from ranger headquarters, while Nack was trying to come up with a solution, DL gets up on one elbow, and turns to his mates who are gathered around him and says:
His breathing finally stop and he slumps to the ground. Nack's heart will go on, but in the moment he is devastated at the loss, so much so that he doesn't even care about the dirt and blood getting on his pants. Rocko does not really care but pretends to be saddened to garner attention and fit in. Tonka places a hand on the shoulder of his now deceased vitriolic best bud- Posted Image "He's one with the light now." He says solemnly, removing DL's ranger star and pocketing it. Posted Image "Rest in peace sweet prince." Posted Image "He meant so much to me, this is a tremendous loss and I am deepy saddened." -Tonka obeys DL's wishes and tans his hide, He makes a belt and keeps the rest to bind a book in, because that's metal as fuck.- We decide to take what's left of him back to the citadel and bury him in the ranger graveyard. Inside everyone knew this could have been avoided, we were cocky, underestimated the Wasteland, we could have kept range and played it safe, but we didn't. DL wouldn't die in vain, Nack would learn surgeon, and Tonka vows that the party will step it up. If anyone falls again, it won't be because of a dumb mistake like that.
Until we close our eyes for good~ James, born a man died a ranger. DL's goat continues to follow the party.
(I tried to level up after DL went down in order to get surgeon skill for Nack by picking up the quest objective and spamming the radio button, -tbh I cheated and tried twice, might have gotten it on the third try but it felt artificial, so that's that.)
Too many people have opinions on things they know nothing about. And the more ignorant they are, the more opinions they have.
If you guys have any suggestions for skill progression for either your avatar or someone else's, pls leave them. Since I have no clue what most of you are good at, or think you would be good at in a wasteland scenario.
Too many people have opinions on things they know nothing about. And the more ignorant they are, the more opinions they have.
rip in piece dl, you were my best friend, my brother, and my soulmate throughout all these years. i will miss you and mourn for you from today until the end of eternity.
also, im quite content with however you feel the need to build rocko. im just saddened that you think im older than you. :(
Maybe we won't get overloaded with skill points and the few tagged are good enough.. we'll see. But I would like suggestions, not for the sake of your happiness, but to save me the trouble of thinking up what to level.
As for age, I made Rocko older because of his backstory, I personally thought you were older than me, but younger than Nacale.
Too many people have opinions on things they know nothing about. And the more ignorant they are, the more opinions they have.
I'd like to keep my skill points in the direction they are going. I'm not great at many things but i am great at the few things i do know (field medic, surgeon, energy weapons). Not sure if coordination effects aim/accuracy if so i'd probs need more if imma be firin' ma lazerss. But, if you feel you needed me to learn anything new i'd be willing.
You're doing well enough with our personalities and I trust your overall decisions; if i have concerns/ideas/input i'll come to you~
Spoiler: click to toggle
DL will be greatly missed. I am going to miss our homoerotic relationship in game just as i do irl. <3
make rocko the single most autistic person on the planet then. elliot rodger be damned, rocko is a man who has finally reached his breaking point and needs to be recognized as the supreme gentleman that he is.
as a result, animal whispering is a must. every true autist has animal friends who will come to his aid in his time of need. another thing to consider is MAXING OUT COMPUTER SCIENCE. barring friends in real life (good joke), the computer is a true autists best friend. finally, since rocko is both true autist AND true samurai, bladed weapons needs to be maxed. this will ensure great honor AND the ability to commit sudoku properly.
While we were gathered around DL, Angela turned to the back of the cave , before her lay Ace's killer, a downed robot. Rocko, realizing that nobody was paying attention to him went over to see what Angela was looking at: Posted Image "Should have known it would be a robot." Posted Image Posted Image "Scuse me, I...I need a minute." Posted Image " Shut the fuck up Angela, can't you see we're coping with a serious loss over here?" Posted Image "Some people" Nack says, shaking his head at Angela's disrespect. We pack everything up and exit the cave, Tonka decides we're going to slaughter the bandits in DL's name, it would probably be smarter to try and get another recruit to replace DL first: Posted Image "Is this a good idea? We're not exactly at full strength." Posted Image "The plan is to fight smarter, not be smarter at picking fights." On our way there it is evident that DL's goat is following Rocko. Rocko is the goat's rebound, but he's okay with that, Posted Image Posted Image "Rocko's Moving on up."
We approached the raiders, who were still passive due to our earlier threat, Angela took the high ground, and the rest of us positioned around the raider furthest back. Posted Image
We opened fire, Angela wounded a raider, who was then hit by Nack's phase blaster, his body melted into a puddle of purple goo. Posted Image Tonka blasted a raider from the right, knocking him down into a pool of his own blood. Posted Image He turned his attention to the remaining hostile, the raider he had just downed got back up onto his feet, and shot Tonka in the back as he was moving forward, critically wounding him. Posted Image Rocko-san cut off the raider's legs with his blade as Tonka fell face first into the dirt. Posted Image Angela fired on the final enemy combatant from atop the high ground, filling him with lead. Posted Image Nack rushed to Tonka's side to use his newly learned surgeon skills, he removed the bullet and stitched up the wounds, using blood packs to get him back into fighting condition. Posted Image Tonka wasted no time thanking him, there were more raiders to kill. The party reloaded their weapons Posted Image and rushed into the next fight, taking the long way around to the back of the radio tower, opposite of where they'd threatened the raider with his dogs.Angela immediately opened fire, the bullets from her rifle tearing through the raider's neck, decapitating him, the rest of us took cover. Posted Image The raider's guard dogs rushed Rocko, who stabbed one in the face while running to get by a set of barrels. Tonka shot the second dog before it had a chance to react. Posted Image Posted Image "I told you we'd kill those dogs.." Posted Image "And we weren't kidding about eating them either." NacK looked put off at the idea. The final raider attacked, enraged at the death of his dogs, a phase blast hitting his gut melted his torso, his entrails were liquefying into a stream of violet. Posted Image The massacre was done, and the party felt better for it. A short smoke break and it was time to pack up and return DL's body to the citadel. We made it back to the citadel without issue, Tonka picked up that sleek leather jacket, and we made our way to the cemetery. We decided DL would have liked to be buried in Ace's grave, since that shithead Vargas was being such a hard-ass about him digging that spot. We left Angela at the entrance and tossed Ace in a ditch, replacing him with DL, and filling the hole back up with dirt. Posted Image Posted Image "That'll do pig, that'll do." Posted ImageNack let out the traditional mouring cry of his people, to honour DL:
Posted Image "I am an emotional wreck because of this. If any ladies want to help me feel better in my time of need, please do so." We figured we'd done enough mourning for the little freak and moved on, it was time we went to highpool and Ag center to attach those repeater units to the radio towers. We travelled past the radio tower and into a mountainous pass to the east, on our way there we received a radio signal from highpool Posted Image Moments later we received ANOTHER distress message from a woman at ag center, she was really abrasive and loud so we decided to shut it off. braving the radiation(And taking a bunch of damage along the way) Posted Image we finally arrived at highpool. Posted Image As the distress call had said, the town was overrun with raiders, killing them was our first priority, followed by attaching the repeater units. The ranged members of our party took behind a block of rubble while Rocko grabbed cover behind a wrecked car a little further up. Posted Image Having the drop on the bandit up ahead, angela took a shot at an explosive barrel by his side, killing him instantly. Posted Image Reinforcements came at the sound of the explosion, the first running into a volley of our bullets, he was dispatched in an instant. Another took cover behind a thick barricade of barrels. Posted Image Rocko took the flank, the bandit putting pressure on him with his rifle, smashing the crate Rocko had hid behind into splinters. Posted Image While the raider reloaded Rocko charged his position and slashed his torso for 4 damage. Tonka charged the front while the raider was distracted. Posted Image Before Tonka could rush to Rocko's side he was struck by friendly fire from a clumsy nigger. Posted Image "Wash that chicken grease off your fingers, sambo!" Posted Image(smirk) Posted Image Shells flying by the raider kept him from rearing his rifle up, Tonka approached from behind and executed the raider, it was very badass. Posted Image Posted Image "That's how it's done. (smurk) "
Too many people have opinions on things they know nothing about. And the more ignorant they are, the more opinions they have.