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| Bad joke of the day | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Sep 3 2013, 05:28 PM (1,890 Views) | |
| towr | Jul 6 2015, 04:54 PM Post #121 |
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Defender of the pie
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pfeh, vaccuums suck. |
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| towr | Jul 10 2015, 10:53 AM Post #122 |
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Defender of the pie
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She pointed the gun at me, a cold look in her eyes. "I'm going to miss you", she said. I was relieved, I had been sure she intended hit me. |
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| towr | Jul 26 2015, 09:14 AM Post #123 |
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Defender of the pie
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If Hillary becomes president of the United States, will she be paid 22% less than a male president? |
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| Snofox Kari | Jul 26 2015, 03:00 PM Post #124 |
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Protector of the Winter Forest
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haha...if she does, would that be a step in the right direction (for a president to get less instead of taking more) or further proof of issues (by being woman)?
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| towr | Aug 7 2015, 07:27 AM Post #125 |
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Defender of the pie
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You should always be careful when going to the bathroom, because you know what they say: loo slips sink ships. |
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| towr | Aug 7 2015, 07:44 AM Post #126 |
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Defender of the pie
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Via NewScientist, the Daily Telegraph on the murder rate in the US:Apparently Americans are like cats and have more than one life. |
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| towr | Dec 23 2015, 05:57 PM Post #127 |
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Defender of the pie
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I was really disappointed when my universal remote wouldn't pause the universe. |
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| Snofox Kari | Dec 23 2015, 06:15 PM Post #128 |
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Protector of the Winter Forest
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that's because you need the "universe control panel" to work with it Universe control panel
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| towr | Dec 30 2015, 04:57 PM Post #129 |
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Defender of the pie
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Two paraplegics walk into a bar. IT'S A MIRACLE! |
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| Snofox Kari | Dec 31 2015, 12:38 AM Post #130 |
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Protector of the Winter Forest
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How does a quadriplegic cross a freeway? (take the "f" out of "free, then take the "f" out of "way) THERE'S NO F-IN WAY! |
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| towr | Jan 1 2016, 09:43 PM Post #131 |
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Defender of the pie
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My friends always complain I don't give a rat's ass when it's their birthday. But then, the one time I do, they're shocked and appalled and asking "what the heck did you do to that poor rat, you sick bastard". Hey, I don't go around stalking the sewers, hunting rats, for fun, you know. I'd have rather gotten you chocolates too, but it's what you asked for - who am I to argue. The gratitude of some people. |
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| towr | Jan 23 2016, 10:05 AM Post #132 |
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Defender of the pie
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If you use puns at too high a frequency, it Hertz. |
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| towr | Jan 30 2016, 10:34 AM Post #133 |
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Defender of the pie
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He was a diamond in the rough... Well, coal. |
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| Snofox Kari | Jan 30 2016, 05:51 PM Post #134 |
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Protector of the Winter Forest
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Was he stuck between a rock and a hard place? |
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| towr | Jan 30 2016, 08:35 PM Post #135 |
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Defender of the pie
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He was under a lot of pressure, certainly. So his time to shine might yet come.
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7:03 PM Jul 11