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| Tweet Topic Started: Jan 14 2014, 04:24 PM (29,097 Views) | |
| Disorder | Jul 15 2016, 12:26 PM Post #1306 |
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Lt Paddy 'Chancer' Boyle
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So it seems condoms don't offer protection anymore during sex. My friend was wearing one when he was shot by the womans husband...
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| RJ Tucker | Jul 15 2016, 07:14 PM Post #1307 |
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Patrolling the MMM frontier
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He, probably, didn't read the directions & put it on the gun incorrectly.
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| beowulf | Jul 17 2016, 12:42 PM Post #1308 |
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Lt. Paul 'Red Dog' Rose
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| beowulf | Jul 17 2016, 12:44 PM Post #1309 |
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Lt. Paul 'Red Dog' Rose
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| beowulf | Jul 17 2016, 12:48 PM Post #1310 |
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Lt. Paul 'Red Dog' Rose
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![]() obviously photoshopped..............i mean, everyone knows the Incom T65 is drogue and probe!
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| beowulf | Jul 19 2016, 05:47 PM Post #1311 |
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Lt. Paul 'Red Dog' Rose
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| Olde Farte | Jul 21 2016, 12:12 PM Post #1312 |
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Lt. Derek 'Smurfy' Reeve
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Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself,'Lillian, you should have remained a virgin..' - Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter) <><> I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalogue: - 'No good in a bed, but fine against a wall.' - Eleanor Roosevelt <><> Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement.. - Mark Twain <><> The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible - George Burns <><> Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. - Victor Borge <><> Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. - Mark Twain <><> By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. - Socrates <><> I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. - Groucho Marx <><> My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. - Jimmy Durante <><> I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back. - Zsa Zsa Gabor <><> Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat. - Alex Levine <><> My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying. - Rodney Dangerfield <><> Money can't buy you happiness .... But it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery. - Spike Milligan <><> Until I was thirteen, I thought my name was SHUT UP . - Joe Namath <><> I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap. - Bob Hope <><> I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.. - W. C. Fields <><> We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. - Will Rogers <><> Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you. - Winston Churchill <><> Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty .. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.. - Phyllis Diller <><> By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere. - Billy Crystal Edited by Olde Farte, Jul 21 2016, 12:13 PM.
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| beowulf | Jul 23 2016, 05:08 PM Post #1313 |
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Lt. Paul 'Red Dog' Rose
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| Nikon User | Jul 24 2016, 07:28 AM Post #1314 |
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"BEAVER"
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I accidentally passed my wife a tube of superglue the other day, when she asked for the lip salve. She's still not talking to me. |
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| RJ Tucker | Jul 24 2016, 11:05 AM Post #1315 |
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Patrolling the MMM frontier
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| beowulf | Jul 25 2016, 10:27 AM Post #1316 |
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Lt. Paul 'Red Dog' Rose
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| RJ Tucker | Jul 25 2016, 10:31 AM Post #1317 |
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Patrolling the MMM frontier
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![]() A joke thread? That'll be pun! |
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| Olde Farte | Jul 27 2016, 09:46 AM Post #1318 |
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Lt. Derek 'Smurfy' Reeve
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This is what we seniors go through. The other day I went over to our Pharmacy.. When I got there, I went straight to the back of the store to where the Pharmacists' Counter is located and took out my little brown bottle along with a teaspoon and laid them both onto the counter. The pharmacist came over smiled and asked if he could help me. I said, "Yes! Could you please taste this for me?" Being I'm a senior citizen... I guess the Pharmacist just went along with me and picked up the spoon and put a tiny bit of the liquid on his tongue and swilled it around. Then with a stomach-churning look on his face he spit it out on the floor and began coughing.When he finally was finished, I looked him right in the eye asked, "Now, does that taste sweet to you?" The pharmacist, shaking his head back and forth with a venomous look in his eyes yelled, "HELL, NO!!!" So I said, "Oh thank God! That's a real relief! My doctor told me to get a pharmacist to test my urine for sugar!" |
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| RJ Tucker | Jul 28 2016, 01:02 PM Post #1319 |
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Patrolling the MMM frontier
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YOU GO GIRL FRIEND!!! ![]()
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| mrvr6 | Jul 28 2016, 05:41 PM Post #1320 |
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Lt. john 'Buzz Kill' burton
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haha |
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2:39 PM Jul 11