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Archived Eeek Archived; Plotholes galore
Topic Started: Feb 11 2008, 04:50 PM (572 Views)
Clisp
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
*Everyone is chatting on MSN*

Clisp: so the end of the last story had a pretty mixed response

BAS: XD XD it was awesome!!!

Aussie: i was just pointing out all the plotholes

jase: yeah, like you all forgetting about me :angry:

Sal: youre smaller than tom cruise, thats why

jase: i suppose that has some advantages...

Pudopist: yeah like being able to give head easier

lostboy: and stepping onto a broken rake would be less painful

Pudopist: no, hes a dickhead

jase: at least i have a dick :angry:

Aussie: you could play botta's boomstick

Clisp: yeah then his face can be even more vanilla

BAS: XD

bottaboomstick: stay away from my boomstick, its reserved for bettyboobsuck

Zar: (uses laughing woman wink)

Sal: argh! what the hell is that?

lostboy: i is askeer'd

Aussie: its zar being an ass using those annoying winks that just wont SHUT THE FUCK UP!

Zar: (uses laughing woman wink)

jase: there it is again!

Aussie: FFS!

Clisp: dammit zar if you keep doing that i WILL block you

BAS: XD that is awesome!

Zar: (uses laughing woman wink)

bottaboomstick: oh dear god...

Clisp: stop spamming, dicktits!

*everyones computer starts to fuck up*

Aussie: what the fuck?

Clisp: shit ive got a virus!

jase: me too

Sal: i think we all do

lostboy: im askeer'd

*lostgirl has been added to the conversation*

lostgirl: hi what are you guys talking about?

lostgirl: oh no ive got a virus!

Clisp: we all have

Pudopist: i think our computers fucked paris hilton too

Ausie: what the hell my sceen is swirling

jase: mine too

Clisp: shit im getting sucked in!

Sal: oh no

*everyone has been sucked into a place that looks strangely familiar*

BAS: Wow where are we?

Clisp: All this grass... and those houses...

jase: Oh my God! It's the Overgrown map from Call Of Duty 4!

Sal: What the hell are we doing here?

*Sniper shot can be heard*

Everyone: SHIT! *Everyone runs and hides in the upstairs of the middle house*

Aussie: I think we're in a team deathmatch...

jase: Search and Desroy actually.

Aussie: So we only have one life each? Shit!

Clisp: Hmmm... *Stabs Zar with spear*

Zar: What the fuck are you doing?

Clisp: It's your fault we're here! And why the hell aren't you dying?

Aussie: Friendly fire is off on CoD4.

Clisp: Oh yeah... *Smacks forehead*

jase: Oh shit I have a red ping! Aussie how come yours is green?

Aussie: Coz I'm speshul!

Pudopist: Har har jase is lagging! *Pulls jase's pants down*

jase: So anyway I'm screwed. *Starts walking and suddenly trips over his own pants* What the fuck!

*Everyone laughs*

Clisp: We can't stay here for long or they'll find us.

BAS: Shit, what are we gonna do?

lostboy: I'm askeer'd...

lostgirl: You always are!

(What are we going to do? This is quite the predicament...)
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Zar
Im So Sexy
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
Quote:
 
lostboy: I'm askeer'd...

lostgirl: You always are!


*Zar i know, hey its kinda depressing
BAS: Zar, about before, dont fucking use my charlie suit again, you cant, its not possible, its my ability, it only works for me
*Zar umm did you read the instructions i gave you, it says there, that it has a time sphere where people in a 24 meter radius are taken back in time too, it was used all the time on that ship before
Aussie: Stop fucking using logic,
*Zar dont be stupid its illogical to be logical, so me being logical, is illogical
Aussie...
BAS...
Lost..
Lostgirl

that reminds me , lostgirl, go inside one of those houses, and make us all sandwiches, im fucking hungry
lostgirl: fuck you, im not your slave
*Zar geeze lost, what the fuck, your hell pussywhipped, fuck
*Zar and lost gil, you get your ass in that fucking kitchen right fucking now fucking cunt
lostgirl starts crying
*Zar , jeeze, fuck this shit, SAL, your the closet to a girl here, go make me and the boys sandwhcihes
lostgirl, i am a girl
SAL, fuck you
*Zar no, youre not a girl, if you were a girl youed be making some fucking, food for us, in a fucking kitchen whore, and sal do what i fucking tell you, or ill tell the guys that secret
SAL runs to a kitchen
AUSSIE: what secret
*Zar i dont fucking know, i just figured hed have one
BAS Fucking A dude
Bill clinton: hey guys
Everyone WHAT THE FUCK!!!
Bill i was stalking lost girl online again, we were cybering!
Everyone: Facepalms
*Zar Okay,,,,
SAL: sandwhiches are ready guys
*Zar yeah about fucking time
Everyone eats
Bas: that was crap food
*Zar well if lostgirl made them <,<
lostgirl: shut up
Aussie: dont be so mean
*Zar anyway, i think we should get going, i can hear machine gun fire
Clisp: how the fuck can you hear MG fire, we cant
*Zar [size=14]UMMM, READ MY FUCKING PROFILE[/size]

CLISP SUIT: hahaha
Clisp: shut up suit *smacks
clisp suit: stop fucking hitting me
*Zar , im getting a headache
*Zar look lets just go other there in that bunker
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BledAngelShadow
Member Avatar
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
Everybody huddles down in a bunker to "collect their thoughts"

B A S: What are we gonna do? I never played this game... what are the controls -accidentally shoots Jase- DAMN...
Jase: OW... -gives B A S a game tutorial walkthrough... 5 minutes later...- understand?
B A S: I guess so... so um... I guess we just advance on them?
Clisp: Duh?
Aussie: -facepalm- you've played an FPS before right?
B A S: Yes, but I'm a fan of futureperfect FPS games, not modernwar ones
Aussie: futureperfect FPS?
B A S: futureperfect FPS implies its in the future/alternate timestrain future... modernwar implies its a realtime current/recent year war sim, then there is the altwar, which is past warfare sims...
Clisp: I've never heard many of these terms...
Jase: Me either
Aussie: Yeah... ditto...
B A S: I'm pretty sure its a north american thing...
Bill Clinton: I'm so confused... I don't wanna go to war...
W_R: Dude... what did you guys get me into... this so does not OWN... :o(
Elf Aussie: Yeah, I mean, here I was, jac... I mean... watching the Rosie show... and I wound up here...
Lostboy: Yeah, same here.. >_>
Lostgirl: I don't even play CoD either B A S... I'm askeer'd
Lostboy: It's okay sis -gives kiss on lips...-
Panther: rawr?
Botta: This is nuts... guys... um... turn around...
-everybody looks over to see a box scurrying across the floor-
Aussie: What the hell?
Clisp: Um... thats odd...
B A S: Yeah... I'd say so...
-somebody pops out from under the box-
Zar: Man, I always wanted to do that! ^_^
Aussie: hah, i was getting worried for a minute there...
Clisp: I just thought it was stupid...
Zar: Shut up Clisp, its always been my dream to be Snake, and I finally AM! MWAHAHAHAHAA...
Lostboy: No you're not... you're Zar... in a CoD game... not in Metal Gear...
Zar: -kicks Lostboy in the forehead- DON'T PISS ON MY DREAMS!
Pudopist: -pees on Zar's leg- sorry... couldn't resist
W_R: I'm not gonna be of any help in this game guys... I suck at FPS games... I'm all talk... I'm sorry for being such a liar... -cries- mum, i miss you... -looks at his stupid picture with the stuffed lion-
Clisp: Enough talk, WE RIDE!
-everybody runs out and starts gunning down bad guys, Clisp, Aussie, and Jase take point since they appear to have played the game before, B A S stays back with a sniper rifle poppin' heads off... W_R cowars with Lostboy and Lostgirl askeer'd... the Panther eats some bad guys... Bill Clinton runs away... Zar goes crazy with a machine gun running threw and blasting everything, even guys who are already dead-
Clisp: damn, these guys don't stop coming...
Aussie: Yeah, I know... (man i wish B A S had played this game so he could be more detailed)
Jase: i think they stopped...
Zar: Damn, i was having so much fun -pouts-
-everybody wanders into some military base and starts looking around... the door slams shut..-
Automated Voice: welcome to the test laboratory... you have been selected to run experiments of a very wacky and fun nature... you have all been assigned a ever adorable and loving companion cube , it will accompany you through your tasks here-
B A S: Um... guys... we are trapped in Portal now apparently...
Jase: AWESOME!
Clisp: The cake is a lie...
Aussie: I want cake...
Paris Hilton: Like, I like.. cant believe like, that like this is like, real like... yeah like...
W_R: -Shoots Paris Hilton- EVEN I'M LESS ANNOYING THAN YOU!
Clisp: That's arguable...
Lostboy: Now who will suck my...
Lostgirl: I WILL!!
B A S: Man... this is nuts... -grabs his portal gun and goes on to do the puzzles-
Clisp: How are we gonna get out of the game world B A S?
B A S: By winning... how else?
Pudopist: Lets go guys... this could be a long night... i wish we went somewhere with a bar atleast...
Jase: I'm underage...
Clisp: Me too
Aussie: same here...
B A S: sucks to be you!
-everybody babels incoherently as they wander deeper into the test lab of PORTAL 2...-



(it sucked, i know...)
"One bullet for my head... and two for yours!"
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Aussie
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
-Aussie- "Cool i pwned at portal"

-Clisp- "Yeah.. erm... me too"

-Aussie- "Bullshit we all know you never finished it!"

-BAS- *Starts singing end song*

-Zar- "BEST PUZZLE GAME EVER!"

-lostboy- *Zips up* "Lets do it"

-lostgirl- "Swallows"

-BAS- "Fucking A, i knew she did"

-Aussie- *Grabs portal gun and creates one portal above lostgirl and another in the corner then goes to the corner and starts urinating*

-lostgirl- "EWW! this is just like camp all over again"

-jase- "Whats that?"

-Clisp- "It looks like an area behind the wall we can get to"

-everybody- *Goes in*

-BAS- "This is strange"

-Zar- "Yeah it looks almost like"

-Clisp- "I know where we are"

-Aussie- "Where?"

-Clisp- "It's Britan"

-BAS- "Then that means"

-Zar- "We're in Resistance"
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BledAngelShadow
Member Avatar
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
-crazy alien things are running everywhere, some dumb bald guy is shooting at them distracting them from us-

B A S: Oh man, we are in the big leagues now...
Aussie: I pwn at this game!
Clisp: ME TOO!
W_R: I don't really, it was all talk... sorry guys...
Bill Clinton: Wow, those things remind me of Hillary! hyuk hyuk..
Elf Aussie: Dude... I almost got stuck in a wall cause of Lostboy being a dope...
Lostboy: The Panther wouldnt't follow me so I had to use you as bait... idjit!
Elf Aussie: I hate you lostboy...
Lostboy: -hits Elf Aussie... Elf Aussie cries-
Lostgirl: You made him cry! -slaps Lostboy-
Zar: I hate you guys...
Jase: Ditto...
Pudopist: I hate you Zar... I don't know you but I hate you... =D
Zar and Pudopist: -get in a fist fight-
-alien things spot Zar and Pudopist fighting and start flocking over to us-
B A S: You idjits! you gots their attention! Everybody, get your guns ready...
Clisp: I only have the portal gun!
Aussie: Yeah, we need a new gun...
W_R: Are you guys kidding me? Even i know what to do now...
B A S: Which is?
W_R: RUN AWAY! -runs and hides-
Cameo by Sly: HAH HAH! (like nelson from the Simpsons) -disappears-
Clisp: Sly! COME BACK! We need guns!
B A S: -fires the portal gun at the alien and watches it vanish into nothingness- O___O NICE!
Clisp: -does a barrel roll firing at aliens taking out a few-
Jase: SCREW THIS -grabs Elf Aussie and runs up to the aliens and procedes to beat them to death with Elf Aussie-
Elf Aussie: YAAAAAARRRGGG... X___X -man down-
Panther: -sees an alien that looks yummy- o___________o -walks over- YARP!
Alien: BLUUUUURCH... -dead-
Lostboy: Yarp? WTF?! YARP FTW!!
Lostgirl: Shut up baby and get to work -sucks at using a gun and shoots clisp and he disappears-
Aussie: CLISP... NOOOOOOOO! -shoots Lostgirl and she disappears-
Lostboy: My girlfri... i mean sister! BASTARD -shoots Aussie with portal gun, Aussie disappears...-
B A S: NOOOOOOOO, AUSSIE! damnit lost... hey.. wait... i got an idea.. -shoots Lostboy with portal gun, along with everybody else...-
B A S: I guess this is the moment of truth... -shoots self with Portal gun- ...

Over 2 hours later...

B A S: -wakes up- yun... -yaaaaaaaawn- where am i?
Lostboy: -kicks B A S in the face when he sets up- DICK!
B A S: X______X -wakes up to Aussie trying to give B A S mouth to mouth- AHHHH, get off me! -shoves Aussie-
Aussie: I thought you was dead...
B A S: Yeah.. sure... =D where are we?
Zar: I have no clue...
Clisp: Me either...

A Loud annoying sound can be heard in the background... BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP over and over

B A S: What the HELL is that sound?
Zar: Oh god no...
B A S: What?
Jase: Everybody... we need to run...
Lostboy: I is askeer'd...
Lostgirl: I is more askeer'd...
Pudopist: -wets himself- >_>
W_R: -shits himself-
Zar: ITS PACMAN! RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!

Everybody runs from pacman... the Benny Hill music plays in the background

"One bullet for my head... and two for yours!"
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Aussie
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
-Aussie- *Is emensly suprised that an american would know of Benny Hill*

-BAS- "Not all yanks are idiots"

-Clisp- *Laughs*

-Zar- "What can you read minds now BAS?"

-Aussie- "Kicks Zar in the dick"

-Zar- "HA HA now i can be as logical as i want i have a cup"

-lostboy- "How are we gonna get out of here?"

-Zar- "Easy dipshit just find the ghosts and lead them to pack man"

-lostgirl- "Allow me" *Throughs panties on Pac Man"

-Pac Man- "Oh shit"

-Pac Woman- "What the fuck do you think your doing?"

-Ghosts- "Im staying the fuck out of this"

-Pac Man- "I can't deal with this" *Shoots self*

*That annoying sound when Pac Man dies*

-Pac Woman- "NOO!" *cries*

-Aussie- "Ok so how do we get outta here?"

-Zar- "Pac Man had so many fucking levels nobody has ever beaten it"

-BAS- "Then we must do what millions have done before us"

-Clisp- "Way ahead of you" *Runs into ghost*

-Everyone- *Follows Clisp*

-Ghost- "Did you ever wonder why we kill?"

-Ghost #2- "No! A.I was shit back in the day"

-BAS- "So where the fuck are we now?"

-Aussie- "Well i though we could only enter PS3 games but Pac Man fucked that up" (hint hint)

-Clisp- "Yeah i have no idea"

-Zar- "Thats because you never listen to Aussie and buy games that pwn"

-Aussie- "YES!" *orgasm's"

-lostboy- "I is askeer'd of demons"

-BAS- "Oh shit no"

-Dante- *Starts doing shakespear*
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BledAngelShadow
Member Avatar
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
Nero starts out giving Aussie the stink eye cause hes a racist prick

Aussie: Guys... we gotta go...
Nero: Why go? You came here to see me didn't you? -cries- don't leave!
B A S: Erm... okily dokily?
Elf Aussie: -still man down-
Clisp: I still haven't played this game yet...
Nero: What game?
Jase: Your mom!
Aussie: Jase HUSH!
Zar: I have, Nero, you suck...
Nero: I'm gonna go emo if you guys don't stop being mean to me!
B A S: You are already emo.. look at your hair you nub!
Nero: -cries-
Pudopist: I'm so lost... who is Nero?
B A S: emo boy here... you can't see em?
Pudopist: No... i think im going blind... -cries-
Botta: OH NOEZ pud is cryin -kicks his face-
Bill Clinton: Now son that was mean...
Botta: Yer mom?
B A S: What is with everybody copping an attitude lately?
Aussie: SHUT UP BAS!
B A S: -hits Aussie- ANYBODY ELSE GOT SOMETHIN TO SAY?
Zar: Yes I DO! -takes a swing at BAS and gets attacked by Jase-
Jase: DIIIIIIIE...
Clisp: what the hell? whats wrong with you guys?
Clisp Suit: There is plot hole in the air... i can smell it...
Clisp: Ahh.. why aint it affecting me?
Clisp Suit: Because you are wearing me =D
Clisp: I love you Clisp Suit!
Clisp Suit: Shut up...
Clisp: -watches the brawl- man.. what can we do to stop this now?
Clisp Suit: Cowbell... we need cowbell!
Clisp: COWBELL! thats it! -busts out cowbell-
COWBELL...
Clisp: I hope it works...
Clisp Suit: Im not sure... -everything goes black suddenly for everybody-

2 hours later everybody wakes up in..
"One bullet for my head... and two for yours!"
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Zar
Im So Sexy
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
*Zar ughh


Drmmmmm Drmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

BAS whats that fucking sound
Aussie it sounds familar
Clisp: i cant put my finger on it
*Zar wait, i know that sound.. its its
SAL: hey Guys its a Bghhh
Aussie Bghh
Sal Zar hit me
*Zar well i was fucking talking
Clisp suit: well what the fuck is it bitch
*Zar its a DROP SHIP, oh jeez
look other there its another drop ship
*Zar runs to pilot it
*Zar guys jump in, sal, you get in that warhwak and protect me
SAL, finally something im actually good at
*Zar only because you spent 350 hours playing warhawk
sal...
Aussie: LOSER!!
BAS, mwhahwahahahahahhahaha
ORANGE WIZARD in tank: mwhahahhahaha ive come to get my revenge for making me look like a idiot Zar, and SAL
*Zar so fucking what
*Zar goes into attack mode and destroys the tank in secounds, then proceeds to destroy every vehcile around him
*Zar MWHAHAHAHAHA, guys man the turrents, lets farm everyone
*Zar WARHAWKS 12 of them
*Zar starts tap firing the megacannons destroying 3 of them, aussie gets 2, sla gets 5, and bas somehow manages 2m where clisp gets the rest
lost:how come im never in your posts
*Zar you are
*Zar look its orange wizard

*Zar theres the other drop ship, full missile barage WOOT 7 kills

Aussie: you enjoy this too much
*Zar its fun
BAS, im getting this game when this shits finished




30 minutes later
*Zar and the guys on the blue team 100000000000
orangeWizard and the trolls 0
Orange wizards KDR is now (Negative:P) - 1000000000.00000000
*Zar game over
*Zar looks like where going somewhere new
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Clisp
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
Clisp: I'm in a car here and can't see myself... I'm not using invisibility either.

Zar: Same here.

BAS: Look at me in this fat-ass van!

jase: I can see the van but not you.

Paris: Great, now no one can see me. What is the point of my existence now?

lostboy: Was there ever any point in your existence?

Bill: I may have a nagging wife next to me, but at least I don't have to see her!

Clisp: Yeah we can only identify each other by the names above our cars.

Elf Aussie: I can't see anything. (Is too short to see out the window)

BAS: How the hell is Rover able to drive? Never mind...

Sal: We must be in Burnout.

Aussie: *Takes down jase*

jase: *Hides so we don't see his picture*

Aussie: What the hell have you got to hide anyway?

Pudopist: The dick on his head probably.

lostboy: *Revs his car* Shit this is powerful! But it also makes me askeer'd...

lostgirl: No jokes about women drivers please!

Pudopist: We won't!

lostgirl: You better not. *Drives and ricochets from wall to wall, ending in a huge crash*

Pudopist: The car probably had enough of the period blood pouring onto the seat.

lostgirl: *Screams really high pitched*

Sal: Shit, my ears!

lostgirl: If we weren't invisible, I would be marching right up to you and shoving your bollocks down your fucking throat! Then you would be Pudo-Pissed!

Pudopist: Well I guess that confirms her menstrual status.

*lostgirl takes down Pudopist*

Aussie: I'm surprised she actually managed that...

lostgirl: Do you wanna be next?

Aussie: You couldn't catch me even if I was driving with my teeth.

lostgirl: That could be arranged...

Aussie: At least Paris had the decency to let her butler do the driving.

lostgirl: *Screams again*

Clisp: The chase is on!

*Everyone follows as lostgirl chases Aussie*
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BledAngelShadow
Member Avatar
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
Aussie drives into a tunnel and everybody takes chase into it.

Aussie: I think im gettin away from er!
Lostgirl: GET BACK HERE!
Lostboy: I IS ASKEER'D!!!!
Panther: -somehow driving- RAWR?
Elf Aussie: Man I'm glad I found this crutch in the back seat! -is standing up on the driver seat-
B A S: Dude, this van totally makes me look like a hippy... DAMNIT
Clinton: I can't believe it, I'M DRIVIN! WOOOHOOOOOOOO -crash-
Pudopist: This is fun guys, Aussie you okay up there?
Aussie: ...
W_R: I think he shat himself...
Lostboy: Sis, knock it off, we need to find a way out of here...
Lostgirl: ...
Lostboy: ??? sis?
Panther: YARP...
Elf Aussie: WAAAAAAAAH...
-loud crashing sounds are heard well ahead of Lostboy-
Lostboy: Guys? Whats going on, I is askeer'd!
-There is no answer...-
Lostboy: Guys? Zar? B A S? Aussie? Stupid ass Elf?
-Still No answer...-
Lostboy: Man, I really must drive like a granny... I they must have gotten out of radio range... -crashes into the ass end of Sal-
-A head of twisted metal is left behind as all of the POMer's have had a pile up crash at the end of the tunnel... which had no outro-

When next the POMers awake they are all, in of all places, a football stadium in the middle of a football game..,

B A S: OH DEAR GOD NO! WE ARE IN MADDEN NFL 08! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! ( i really like football though XD )
"One bullet for my head... and two for yours!"
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LOSTBOY78
8 inch member
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
(Madden starts the opening anoucements)
Madden - Well gang, looks like we are going to have a hell of a football game today. We have Carolina Panthers vs. the New Orleans Saints.

Clisp - American Football is dumb, they kick the ball only once in a great while. It should be called GrabAssball. What is up with those dumbass mascots?

BAS - I already told you, they are generic.

Lostboy - Nu-Uh, Saints are named after the French because Louisiana is founded by the French.

Aussie - No wander you are always askeer'd.

Lostgirl - This is so cool, I get to be a cheerleader. Where is Paris? She can be one too.

Bill - She is in the locker room giving the defensive line head. I think I will be a defensive lineman.

Aussie - What can me and Clisp do? We don't know anything about football.

Sal - That is easy, you guys can be the lineman. Just keep the defense off me 'cause I am the QuarterBack.

Botta - I am going to be the reciever.

Aussie elf and Jase - We will block for you.

Botta - I am Fucked. Clisp, can I borrow the Clisp Suit.

Clisp Suit - Why you asking him for? He aint my master. I will let you.

Clisp - Fuck you Clisp Suit.

Aussie - Can't we go through one game with you too fighting.

W_R - If Sal gets to be the QB then I am going to the other team as thier QB

BAS - I'll be the linebacker, I am going to kill that QB. (whisper-using my Charlie Suit)

Zar - What about me?

BAS - You can go carry the Fleur-de-lis flag. Lostboy, you get to be the waterboy.

Lostboy - SOB! Where is Rover?

Rover - YARF!

Lostboy - What the hell are you doing on that side?

Rover - YARF!

Lostboy - Oh, yeah. You are a Panther. Get your ass over hear we need you.

Rover - YARF!

Lostboy - We will paint you black and gold.

Lostgirl - You can understand him?

Lostboy - Yeah, I guess so. He is a reincarnation of me after all.

*Panthers kick off the ball* seconds later Madden - Well the Carolina Panthers just kicked off the ball to get this game started.

BAS - I hate when he says stuff that already happened as if we didn't see it.

fast forward past all the lame ass calls by Madden.



Madden - It is half-time folks and do we have a show for you.

(center field is Lostgirl and Justin Timberlake)

Justin -singing- I'll have you naked by the end of this song *rips Lostgirls top off*

Lostboy - Yeah baby, Yeah.

Clisp - that is your sister.

Lostboy - It is legal in some states, not mine, but some.

(Next half finishes with a score of Panthers 10 and Saints 28)

Clisp - This game sux, Everyone kept holliering "Get the quarter back"
I don't see all the fuss over 25 cents.

BAS - We must have been playing against a bunch of NooBs.

Madden - Those Panthers had to be a bunch of N00Bs to lose to the Saints.

BAS - That is it I am going to kick his ass

(Everyone helps BAS after listening to his play-by/after-play commentary)

*after his ass whoop'n, Madden manages to push a worm hole button sending the possie to who knows where*

Pudopist - That was fun guys.

BAS - Where the hell were you at?

Pudopist - I was the guy in the stands with the foam finger.

~~I am leaving it open for the next poster to decide~~
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BledAngelShadow
Member Avatar
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
The entire POM gang appears in some futuristic environment with lots of awesome looking Alien space crafts...

B A S: -GASP- Can it be?!!
Clisp: What?
Aussie: Where are we?
Sal: No way!!!
B A S: We are where POM all began... ladies and gentleman, WE ARE IN UNREAL TOURNAMENT III!
Clisp: HELL YEAH!
Aussie: It isn't out yet in Australia or UK though...
B A S: We must be in the American version then... oh well!
Sal: -shoots lostboy and POM's him with the flak cannon-
Lostboy: -regenerates- OW... good thing the regenerator is working!
Lostgirl: WOOOOO -shoots Zar and POM's him-
Zar: -explodes and regenerates- OW... BETCH! -uses neumatic hammer on Aussie and POM's him-
Aussie: -explodes regenerates- that hurt! now i know how my head feels... -cries-
Clisp: So lets play!
B A S: -blasts W_R... waits for him to regenerate, blasts him again, POMing him over and over- WON'T ADD ME TO PSN WILL YOU?! DIE YOU BASTARD!
W_R: I'm sorry, I really suck at this game, I'm all talk, okay?
-Zar and Pudopist get in a fist fight for some reason...-
Panther: -eats Aussie Elf over and over- YARP! o______________o
Aussie Elf; AHHHH fellas, help me! hes being mean!
Aussie: SHUT UP ALREADY -blasts Aussie elf with an RPG-
Aussie Elf: NOOOoo... -POMed-

The POMers continue to POM eachother, eventually each person stops respawning, B A S naturally is the only one still alive since he has both played the game before, and is a UT vet...

B A S: Well... I guess I won? -slips into a K hole- AHHHHHHHhhh.......
-B A S is falling down from the sky, and lands on Pudopist-
Pudopist: OW... -splattered-
Lostboy: Where are we now?
Aussie: I have no clue...
B A S: Me either...
Zar: I'm askeer'd... I mean... Lostboy's askeer'd >_>
Lostgirl: It smells like arse in here...
Goober: Hey guys, bet you forgot all about me?
Botta: -kills goober for interupting- shut up...
Jase: Dude... what do we do now?
Pudopist: -gets up slowly- Yeah...
B A S: Well... lets mosey... maybe we can find somebody who can tell us where we are...
Jase: This sucks... I'm hungry
Zar: I'm horny
Aussie: I'm both...
B A S: Damnit... this is one thick jungle... -sigh- we will never get out...
-Dinosaur attacks Elf Aussie-
B A S: Oh GOD NO... this game... IT SUCKS...
Zar: What game?
B A S: Turok... oh god this game is crap... RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!


Everybody runs as fast as they can... a T Rex bursts through the trees chasing us all...
"One bullet for my head... and two for yours!"
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Aussie
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
-Aussie- *Fires bow directly at T-Rex and watches it miss*
-Aussie- This is bullshit fuck you, you dirty motherfucking dinosaur bitch!
-Zar- ... Relax Aussie *Shoots 3 clips into a dinosaur with no effect*
-Zar- Oh i am going to assrape all of you!
-BAS- Guys? Guys! just equipt the knife and stab them all
-lostboy- I is askeer'd
-Aussie- If i here 1 motherfucking "That aint a knife" joke i will ass rape you all with my knife
-lostgirl- Do you promise?
-lostboy- Your my bitch
-BAS- *Stabs 50 dinosaurs*
-Clisp- Can someone help me i keep getting knocked over
-BAS- *Stabs dinosaur thats attacking Clisp*
-Clisp- I think i have a concussion
-Aussie- No you don't the graphics are just shit
-W_R- Not that i don't own at this but how do we get out of here?
-Aussie- I have no fucking idea the level design SUCKS!
-BAS- Ok enough ripping on this game just don't get shot 2 times or you will die
-Clisp- But i was just attacked by Dinosaurs over and over and i didn't die
-BAS- I know this game is really inconsistent
-10 hours later and 100 more problems with this game-
-Zar- Thank fuck we are finally out i hope that is the last shit game we get stuck in
-Clisp- Fuck you jinxed us!
-Zar- Why where are we
-Clisp- LAIR!
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BledAngelShadow
Member Avatar
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
Everybody stands in Lair wondering what to do...


*Zar yay dragons
*Zar burns thousands of men with the dragon
AUSSIE: there our troops
*Zar whats your point
AUSSIE: i KILL you
*Zar you gotta catch me first
AUSSIE wtf, your a ace player at this arnt you
*Zar Yep



B A S: So has anybody else played this crap yet?
-crickets chirp in the background-
B A S: Anybody?
-still no answer-
Aussie: Nobody has played it.. its the worst game put out on PS3...
Sal: I di... -decides not to finish that sentence-
Botta: The game sucked...
Jase: So does B A S' mom!
B A S: My mom is dead...
Jase: I know! -creepy smile-
Aussie: WHAT THE FUCK?!! -is creeped out-

The group sits around mocking Lair for a few hours not even bothering to play the game since it ate nads

Panther: RAAAAAAAAWR...
Lostboy: What's wrong girl?
Lostgirl: Its a boy idiot...
Lostboy: Sorry... I thought it was you sis...
Lostgirl: ...What'd you just say?
Lostboy: I is askeer'd...
Lostgirl: -beats Lostboy to death-
Panther: RAAAAAAAAAWR... -flies off-
Aussie: Um... thats a first... a flying Panther...
Clisp: dude... am I that high?
Jase: Probably Clisp... you sick FUCK!
Pudopist: -turns into a cat and flies off-
B A S: What the hell?
Botta: -Turns into a hampster and flies away-
B A S: -turns into a mop bucket and mop and flies away-
Lostgirl: -turns into a female dog and flies away... yeah i went there!-
Zar: -turns into a warhawk and flies away-
Bill Clinton: -turns into a pig and flies away-
Clisp: This is just wierd... -turns into a monkey and flies away-
Jase: -turns into a kangaroo and flies away-
Aussie: This is just... creepy... -turns into a Dingo and flies away-
W_R: -turns into a chicken and dies-
W_R's Mum: -shows up and turns into a dumb stuffed lion and explodes-

Eventually every POMer turned into something and flew away...
B A S: where are we... its so dark...
Clisp: I have no clue...
Aussie: It sure is dark though...
-lights turn on-
Zar: AHHH, bright...
Jase: Where are we...

*Zar what the fuck.... guys in hoods and shit
*Zar were in ASSASSINS creed
"One bullet for my head... and two for yours!"
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Aussie
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
-Aussie- Great this will suck
-BAS- So have those scientests at NASA figured out what the fuck is going on at the end yet?
-Zar- No and i doubt they ever will
-Aussie- So who else knew you would have to kill that dumb assassin fuck right from the first level?
-BAS- No kidding it's such a rip that they gave us half a fucking game with a bullshit ending... kinda like HL2 but atleast that is long
-Clisp- I really need to start playing more games
-W_R- I got owned by the christians they are bastards
-lostboy- *kills 20 guards with counters* what are you guys talking about the combat rocks?
-Zar- So you don't give a fuck about the shit story, ending, repetativeness, and last boss/ last boss fight at all?
-lostboy- No i just like using counters
-3 hours later-
-lostboy- Hay guys can we get outta here?
-BAS- I thought you were having SO much fun!
-lostboy- It's old now im bored
-Aussie- Sweet im bored as hell and Altier should be shot for his voice (acting)
-Clisp- Ok so you guys finished the game how do we get outta here?
-BAS- Erm... We um.... Sorta wake up then look at our bed...
-Clisp- *puzzled look* You haven't played the game have you?
-Aussie- He isn't kidding we just need to look at our bed
-Clisp- Oh no fuck that *loads AK rambo style*
-lostboy- What are you doing? I is askeer'd
-Clisp- i will be back
-10 hours later-
-Clisp- Im back
-lostgirl- You could have knocked!
-lostboy- Yeah thats just rude!
-Clisp- EWW!
-BAS- So where were you anyway?
-Clisp- Let's just say we can expect a few delays on HAZE
-Aussie- Oh no fuck that *loads AK rambo style*
-Zar- Now what?
-Aussie- I will be back
-Another 10 hours-
-Aussie- Huh? someone already killed all the dev's at Ubisoft... ah well
-Clisp- *Cough*
-W_R- Can we leave now so i can mass post on gamefaqs?
-BAS- Ok *looks at bed*
.....
-Clisp- Now what?
-BAS- Nothing is happening!
-Aussie- OH fuck this is what you get when a game is just a lead up to a sequel!
-Zar- So... we are stuck here?
-Aussie- I guess... intil a sequel comes out
-Clisp- So what do you want to do til then?
-1 year later-
-lostboy- YES i am finally a level 80 battle mage!
-Aussie- Come on it's time to go
-Clisp- But im level 75
-BAS- He is right we need to stop playing WoW
-Zar- Ok come on then
-Clisp- So where are we this time?
-lostboy- I don't know but the sunlight burns
-W_R- *From the background* YES level 15! Guys!?! where is everyone?
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Clisp
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
*Everyone appears in a castle with enemy soldiers approaching it*

Pudopist: Okay, where the fuck are we?

Aussie: This looks familiar...

Clisp: I think this is Heavenly Sword.

Aussie: Oh God I hated the game!

Sal: Hey at least we won't have to spend a long time here, if you know what I mean.

BAS: :blink:

jase: Read the fucking reviews...

lostboy: *Looks over the barracks and sees the enemy soldiers* I'm askeer'd...

Zar: OMG it's Nariko!

*Nariko is outside the castle killing the enemy soldiers*

jase: And Kai too! *Gets boner*

*Kai is at the top of the castle firing on the soldiers*

lostgirl:*Sigh* boys...

Clisp: Hmm I think I can take advantage of the game's physics here... *Picks up a disk and aftertouches it into Aussie's balls* Hahaha!

Aussie: *Collapses* Fucker...

Sal: *Aftertouches a disk into Clisp's balls*

Pudopist: *Aftertouches a disk into lostboy's balls*

*Everyone starts lobbing disks at each other's balls*

lostgirl: *Sigh* boys... *Disk lands between her tits* Argh!

*Everyone is on the floor in pain*

*Enemy soldiers start to enter the castle*

botta: Shit! We picked the worst time to fuck around...

Aussie: We're screwed...

Nariko: Need a hand?

Sal: You damn right we do.

*Everyone starts to get up slowly*

Kai: I'm here too!

jase: *Gets a boner*

(You continue from here)
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BledAngelShadow
Member Avatar
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
B A S: -swings a Kunai around whacking the POMer's with it accidental- how the hell do you control this thing?
Lostgirl: man, atleast I'm not the only chick now, so the guys will stop tying me up and having orgies...
Clisp: Shut up! -hits lostgirl-
Lostboy: HEY BETCH! That's my girlfriend!
Aussie: It's your sister!
Lostboy: I'm from Louisiana... there isn't a difference here!
W_R: lol OWNED! :o)
Zar: -stabs W_R in the eye with a pencil-
W_R: OWWY!
B A S: owwy? -kicks W_R in the mouth as hard as he can-
Jase: -still with bone- man, this game has awesome graphix!

All of a sudden, everything goes completely black... a loud roar can be heard nearby, a set of glowing eyes flash an erie blood red from where B A S was...

Lostboy: I... AM... ASKEER'D!
Lostgirl: me too...
Aussie: Yeah...
Clisp: ...
Jase: -no more bone-
Pudopist: B A S?
B A S: MY NAME IS JACKIE ESTACADO... and I ... AM... DARKNESS!
Zar: OH ****! (at work.. will fix later)
Lostboy: -faints-
Lostgirl: -faints-
Aussie: um... B A S... are you okay?
B A S: rrrrrrrr....
Elf Aussie: HOLY SHAT BATMAN!
B A S: -right demon head eats Elf Aussies face off, then eats his heart out-
Clisp: OH... MY... GOD! B A S is the badguy this time...
Jase: -grabs a gun- lets take em down!
B A S: But i am the goood guuuy of thiiiis gaaaammmme.... -makes snake slither sound-
Jase: then who are we?
B A S: MEEAAAAAAAAAT! -eats Jases face off then eats his heart out-
W_R: This so... does not... OWNED... -cries-
B A S: BETCH! -eats W_R's face off then eats his heart out- DIE!!!!!!
Aussie: Guys... I think this is the end... -tries to get gun from Jase-
B A S: BAD! -throws Aussie across the room-
Clisp: What do we do?
B A S: -eats lostboy and lost girls hearts out- MOOOOOOOOOORE...
Zar: YOU MOTHER... -gets face eaten off and heart eaten out-

The darkness ingulfs everybody else but Clisp and Aussie one by one...

B A S: Iiiiits TIIIIIIIIiiime...
Aussie: I guess this is the end...
Clisp: I guess so...
Aussie and Clisp hug eachother... and the lights go dark

...

...

...

The lights come back on with all POMers standing around Clisp and Aussie as they are hugging eachother

B A S: Awwww how cute!
Lostgirl: -takes a picture with phone- Thats goin on myspace!
Aussie: but... we thought we were dead...
Clisp: get off me! -shoves Aussie to the ground-
Zar: HAH HAH...
Jase: Were are we now guys...
B A S: I have no clue... but i was just startin to have fun in the last game...
Clisp: So that was you?
B A S: Not really... i was being controlled by the darkness...
Aussie: Erm, okay?
B A S: If you played the game, you'd understand...
Aussie: Ahhh, okay...

Everybody turns and starts to mosey along wondering where they are this time...

"One bullet for my head... and two for yours!"
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Zar
Im So Sexy
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
Aussie damm im hungry
Aussie eats
Aussie i need the bathroom
Aussie uses the bathroom
Aussie im hungry
Aussie i need the bathroom
Aussie uses the bathroom
Aussie im hungry
Aussie i need the bathroom
Aussie uses the bathroom
Aussie im hungry
Aussie goes to sleep
Aussie wakes up and has a shower for 2 hours
Aussie depressed
Clisp damm im hungry
Clisp eats
Clisp i need the bathroom
Clisp uses the bathroom
Clisp im hungry
Clisp i need the bathroom
Clisp uses the bathroom
Clisp im hungry
Clisp i need the bathroom
Clisp uses the bathroom
Clisp im hungry
Clisp goes to sleep
Clisp wakes up and has a shower for 2 hours
Clisp depressed
BAS damm im hungry
BAS eats
BAS i need the bathroom
BAS uses the bathroom
BAS im hungry
BAS i need the bathroom
BAS uses the bathroom
BAS im hungry
BAS i need the bathroom
BAS uses the bathroom
BAS im hungry
BAS goes to sleep
BAS wakes up and has a shower for 2 hours
BAS depressed
lostboy damm im hungry
lostboy eats
lostboy i need the bathroom
lostboy uses the bathroom
lostboy im hungry
lostboy i need the bathroom
lostboy uses the bathroom
lostboy im hungry
lostboy i need the bathroom
lostboy uses the bathroom
lostboy im hungry
lostboy goes to sleep
lostboy wakes up and has a shower for 2 hours
lostboy depressed
*Zar damm im hungry
*Zar eats
*Zar i need the bathroom
*Zar uses the bathroom
*Zar im hungry
*Zar i need the bathroom
*Zar uses the bathroom
*Zar im hungry
*Zar i need the bathroom
*Zar uses the bathroom
*Zar im hungry
*Zar goes to sleep
*Zar wakes up and has a shower for 2 hours
*Zar depressed
*Zar oh fuck where in the sims
*Zar gives lostgirl flowers
*Zar attempts to kiss lost girl
lost girl pushes away
*Zar gives lost girl money
*Zar attempts to kiss lost girl
lost girl pushes away
*Zar gives lost girl money
*Zar attempts to kiss lost girl
lost girl pushes away
*Zar gives lost girl money
*Zar attempts to kiss lost girl
lost girl Kisses
*Zar fucks lost girl

*Zar gawd this is boring

Creates room with no doors and windows and heaps of furniture infront of a fire place and burns alive everyone

Everyone awakes... IN!
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BledAngelShadow
Member Avatar
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
The POM'ers wake up in a little house in a familiar place, everybody walks downstairs to the main room and look at each other...

B A S: NO WAY!
Zar: AYE CARUMBA
Aussie: It can't be!
Clisp: PLUH!

-the Simpson's theme song plays in the background-

B A S: WOOHOO!
-everybody runs outside the house to see Bart and Milhouse walking along the sidewalk together-
Clisp: HEY BART! YOU ROCK!
Bart: Um... okay?
Milhouse: you guys look.. different
Sal: You are the ones who are different!
Bart: Chill out man!
W_R -attacks Bart for no apparent reason and beats the crap out out of him-
B A S: What the?
Jase: -jumps on W_R and chokes him-
SHAM: IT'S MY TIME TO SHINE! -beats down Milhouse-
Clinton: Gosh guys, I've met these boys before, nothin wrong with em! leave em alone!
Bart: Thanks man!
Panther: o_____________o -eats Milhouse- YARP
Bart: HEY! SPIT HIM OUT!
Panther: o_____________o -eats Bart-
Clisp: uh oh... we are gonna be in trouble...
Elf Aussie: x____________x
SHAM: -goes to say something and is promptly kicked in the jaw by B A S-
B A S: NEVER... EVER... EEEEEEEEVER correct my spelling... AGAIN!
SHAM: x____________x
Pudopist: D'OH!
Aussie: Okay.. this is gettin' weird, lets get the hell out of here..

-everybody runs along and like always, everybody disappears into darkness, and suddenly reappears...-
"One bullet for my head... and two for yours!"
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Aussie
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
-Aussie- Please be a good game, please be a good game...
-Clisp- Where are we?
-Aussie- *looks around* Oh fuck yeah!
-Clisp- Im guessing it's a good game then?
-Zar- Clisp what the fuck are you doing here if you never play games that Aussie tells you to?
-Clisp- I..
-Aussie- Shut up we are in uncharted
-BAS- *Owns some pirates GoW style*
-Aussie- Oh this game rocks
-lostboy- Shut up guys im busy with Elena
-lostgirl- Oh you motherfucker
-lostboy- *runs*
-Pudopist- Damn she is hot
-Aussie- Yeah just wait for Drake to come and fuck everything up for us
-Drake- Im so sexy and charming la la la
-BAS- *Beats Drake to death*
-Zar- Oh thank fuck i was already sick of prissy boy
-Aussie- Watch this *shoots W_R*
-W_R- What the fuck *dances like a bith in a club*
-BAS- lol the shooting in this shit is funny as hell
-Clisp- Fuck im sooooo depressed for missing out
-Aussie- Good in future listen to me
-BAS- Wait wasn't there monst....
-Aussie- Shut up don't ruin the secret
-Zar- The game ruins that little suprise right from the second level
-Aussie- True they didn't need to beat us over the head with it
-Zar- Uh... don't you think we should get outta here before we have to face them?
-Aussie- This game is jibbed you don't need to worry about them til right at the very end like they were a last minute addition or something
-Clisp- Way to ruin the game for me
-lostboy- Help IT"S GOING TO KILL ME!!!
-Zar- You were saying Aussie?
-lostboy- Not them! LOSTGIRL!!!
-lostgirl- Aww just try to get away now i have a laser attached to my gun
-lostboy- *Rolls around on the ground* im safe now
-BAS- Ok enough lets get outta here
-Zar- About time
-Everone- *Gets on boat... like that was soooooo fucking hard!*
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Zar
Im So Sexy
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
Sudenlly there was a great flash, and everything turned EGA Graphics
Aussie what the fuck... this aint no ps3 game
BAS, well we were in a non ps33 game before
Aussie STOP USING LOGIC ZAR
*Zar that was BAS
Aussie sorry
BAS hehehehe Ughh *Aussie hits him
*Zar wait, were in a space craft, guys i think know this game
clisp what is it..
*Zar its the very first computer game i ever played, its its

SPACE QUEST!
Everyon gasps
Aussie: what the fuck is space quest
Clisp: only the greates ever Space game
BAS complete with comedy
SAL: and a janitor
Lost i spent hours playing these games, nothing to be askeerd of
LG: i spent hours sucking off lost whie he was playing this game, and he still cant get it up
*Zar ...
*Zar anyway, ill lead the way, ill finish the game in 5 minutes
- 5 minutes and 2 secounds later
*Zar finished
Everyone YAY!
me looks like were going some where neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwww

****
*Zar what, this isint a game, this is the HQ
????: How did you escape
*Zar who said that
???: it was i Ryan Payton
*Zar Ryan Payton?, the westifiying Mgs guy
Ryan: the very same
*Zar are you behind this
Ryan I AM
*Zar why
RYAN, BECAUSE!, you were always kojima's Favourite
*Zar so its jealousy
RYAN, yes, after i left KP, 35 foud me and
*Zar shut up io ddont care
RYAN you will, cause ve used the time machine and 35 is back, they guy you killed was a clone
*Zar what>>?
RYAN: yes one of the clones of aussie you made, that the others refused to kill
*Zar NO!
RYAN, Yes, prepare to die

BATTLE

Ryan PAyton VS ZAR

Ryan Payton converts sushi into hot dogs
*Zar HOW COULD YOU!,
Zar Attacks Ryan for 100 damage
Ryan Payton converts Wasabi... into simon cowell
*Zar .. that makes no sence
RYANL NO LOGIC ! MY WEAKNESS * EXPLODES *
*Zar i win....!
*Zar gains a level


*Zar i wonder were the guys are now....
*Zar sees a note on the ground,,
*Zar its a list of games..
*Zar that means there now in...
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BledAngelShadow
Member Avatar
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
MEANWHILE, SOMEWHERE ELSE...

B A S: AHHHH, CAR, Watch out!
Lostboy: I IS ASKEER'D!
Lostgirl: Um... why the fuck are we frogs?
Clisp: It can't be...
Aussie: WE ARE FRENCH!
W_R: No... just frogs you dumbfuck lol OWNED
Aussie: Same difference...
Lostboy: Don't make fun of the french! they founded my Home state!
Jase: I'm sorry...
Aussie: GOD DAMNIT -attacks Jase with his tounge... how else would 1 frog attack another frog?-
Clisp: Um Aussie... are you trying to kiss Jase?
Aussie: FUCK... frogs fight with tongues... I'm straight you know >_>
Jase: I'm not... or am I? I can't tell anymore..
W_R: I'm straight!
Lostboy: -blatantly ignoring W_R- So lets go guys! across the street!
B A S: -HOP- wow shit, barely dodged that one!
Aussie: -HOP- damn B A S, slow down...
Clisp: -flies across street- FUCK YOU GUYS, I CAN FLY!
Aussie: YOU FUCKER -shits- wow... that was wierd...
B A S: -HOP- come back here clisp!
Aussie: -HOP- W_R, are you coming? W_R? -HOP-
W_R: -sigh- this is so gay... -hop- -hop-
Lostboy: -HOP- I is askeer'd now... -HOP-
Lostgirl: -HOP- -HOP- I am so done with you... B A S! Can I suck your cock later? -HOP-
B A S: FUCK NO! -HOP-

-from this point on, until further notice, everybody hops 1 spot per post-
Aussie: Have you noticed not everybody shows up in each game? -HOP-
Clisp: I have a theory that we are being fucked with somehow...
B A S: Clisp, I love you, you are awesome, and funny, and have awesome eyes, but FUCK you are slow... I figured that out like, after 1 game..
Clisp: Did you just insult me outside the insult thread?
B A S: We can't post in the insult thread Clisp...
Clisp: No... you know what, FUCK YOU B A S!!!
Aussie: Guys guys calm down! We don't need to do this here!
W_R: No, Clisp is right, B A S is a know-it-all fucking asshole!
B A S: FUCK YOU W_R!
W_R: YER MOM B A S!
B A S: FUCK! MY MOM IS DEAD GOD DAMNIT... I KEEELED HER...
-everbody stops hopping-
Everybody: What?
B A S: >_> umm... nothing?
Lostboy: I IS SO ASKEER'D RIGHT NOW.. -cries frantically-
B A S: It was a joke...?
Aussie: Dude... what the fuck?
Clisp: Um guys...
W_R: You are one fucked fucker B A S!
Aussie: dude... WHAT... THE... FUCK!?
B A S: IT WAS A JOKE!
Clisp: ...guys?!!!
Lostboy: -splat-
Lostgirl: -splat-
W_R: BAAA -splat-
Aussie: NOOOOO -splat-
B A S: -splat-
Clisp: -safe on the other side- well shit... i guess i win this time?..

EVEYTHING GOES BLACK WHEN...

...
"One bullet for my head... and two for yours!"
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Clisp
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
*Everyone appears in a mysterious room*

Clisp: Where the fuck are we?

Aussie: OMG it's Glados from Portal!

Glados: Greetings. You may have noticed that I have brought you all here for a reason.

Sal: Er... No!

Lostgirl: So it's not Zar's fault after all?

Glados: While you were in those games I have been monitoring your actions and you have proven to be a very interesting bunch indeed.

jase: Get us out of here!

Glados: I have transported Zar here now.

Zar: What the? I was in the middle of something!

Glados: If you people want to get back home into the real world, you must beat my challenge.

botta: What challenge?

Glados: You must defeat some of the toughest bosses that have ever been in videogames.

Lostboy: I'm askeer'd.

BAS: Let's do this!

Clisp: Bring it on!

Pudopist: Hey, after we do this can you sing for us?

Glados: That would spoil the surprise.

*Everyone gets teleported to another place and are approached by...*

(Guys, have Glados commentate the battles)
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BledAngelShadow
Member Avatar
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
B A S: DEAR GOD NO!
Aussie: Um... wtf?
Clisp: What is that thing?
Zar: Why did I get dragged back into this?
Lostboy: It cannot be!
B A S: IT IS! IT IS RUBY WEAPON FROM FINAL FANTASY VII
Glados: I have told you, first you will be baked, and then there will be cake.
Clisp: YOU TOLD US NO SUCH THING!
Glados: Never the less, YOU WILL BE BAKED... and then there will be cake!
Ruby Weapon: GROWLETH! -lights Elf Aussie on fire-
Aussie: OH MY GOD! HE KILLED ELF ME!
Clisp: YOU BASTARD! -clisp flies up and kicks Ruby Weapon in the face-
B A S: Um Clisp... he has 15 million hit points...
Clisp: Hit point? What is a "hit point"?
Zar: -facepalm- we are so dead...
B A S: Hit Points are his life tally
Aussie: Life... tally? Is that like a bonk tally?
Glados: -can be heard face palming- DAMNIT! JUST DIIIIIIIIIE!
-lighning crashes from the sky and explodes Jase-
Aussie: o________o -shrugs-
B A S: GUYS! I KNOW WHAT TO DO! -casts Hades on Ruby Flare- THERE! HE IS STOPPED NOW! EVERYBODY, DO AS I DO -spams knights of the round over and over-
Clisp: Sure whatever... -mimicks B A S-
Aussie: Does it aswell
Lostboy: I AIN' T ASKEER'D NO MORE -gets really angry and lands the killing K O T R on Ruby Weapon-
Zar: This is lame... you guys do what you want, I'm just gonna sit here and watch at this point...
B A S: DAMNIT -kicks Zar in the spleen- BETCH! WE MAY NEED YOUR HELP!
Zar: ow, my spleen... that was uncalled for! whatd me spleen ever do to you?!
-everything goes black-
Glados: Good job... however you must now face your fears in the darkest form imaginable. Meet your next opponent... it is...

...
"One bullet for my head... and two for yours!"
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Clisp
12" inch member
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
Aussie: Who the fuck is he?
BAS: He looks like a cockroach!
Lostboy: His giant spear makes me askeer'd!
Clisp: Ah, it's Lu Bu from Dynasty Warriors.
Glados: You are correct. He is pissed too because I told him you slept with Diao Chan.
Clisp: You bitch!
jase: Oh God that thing looks like it could really hurt!
Sal: I don't wanna be skewered on that thing!
Clisp: You guys can relax. The AI in Dynasty Warriors usually only focuses on one person, and that person obviously is me.
Zar: Why aren't you scared?
Clisp: I've beat this guy countless times, you just need to use cheap tactics. I'm going to block his attacks and you guys should attack him from behind.
Pudopist: What?!
Clisp: Not in that way!
Aussie: Right let's do this.
*Everyone attacks Lu Bu from behind*
Zar: His health is going down really slowly...
jase: We're barely affecting him!
*Lu Bu does a huge swipe and knocks everyone back except Clisp who is still blocking*
Lostgirl: Hey, you almost sliced off my tit!
Clisp: There's no dismembering in Dynasty Warriors, so don't worry. Just grab a meat bun each and your pain will be gone.
*Everyone starts to grab Lostgirl's tits*
Clisp: Not those meatbuns!
BAS: Ohh...
Clisp: Right I have an idea. We knock him into the air with a super strong attack and keep hitting him while he's in the air so he has no chance to land and fight back.
botta: Okay. *Does super uppercut*
jase: I bet that was like uppercutting a baby!
Clisp: Go!
*Everyone starts hitting Lu Bu until his health really slowly depletes*
Lu Bu: I cannot die! I.. I...
Clisp: Enemy officer defeated!
Pudopist: Why the fuck did you say that?
Clisp: It's part of the game. And it's proof that I landed the killing blow! :D
Aussie: That took forever! I'm exhausted.
BAS: Me too.
*Everyone collapses with exhaustion*
Clisp: Now we know how Rosie feels after walking to Burger King and back.
Glados: Such a shame I have to interrupt your rest. You were good. You'd suit the circus with your juggling abilities in fact. But I must take you to your next fight...

*Everyone is warped to...*
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