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when i see's what you don't
Topic Started: Oct 25 2006, 05:29 PM (237 Views)
Riikka
Member Avatar
Female

its pure crud but o well


updated version:


Beneath what's seen with a glance
There lies a heart shot with grief.
It tries to please all in front,
Giving into all that fight.

you Hand him this world you love,
Killing your soul wen'st it's gone;
Watching their smiles grow wider,
As your's falls into vast abyss.

Would you rather hide your thoughts
Than voice your cares with a friend,
Letting his strengths become yours,
Holding you up when in need.

I have become weary of this,
And wish nothing but to sleep;
Close my eyes, disown the world,
Accepting only my dreams.

No matter where my soul has gone
You, like all, can always find
A face that's willing to listen;
That'll give you what you need.
no reason for one...
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Jet Prower (TF)
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I'm Jet Prower.

It sounds good pal, it must be good, because I don't understand it one bit, I stink at understanding poetry. ^_^
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Riikka
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Female

thanks for reading it jet.

its a failure, for a major reason, but thanks for reading it.
no reason for one...
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Erikku
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Run! I'm Coming For You!

Pretty good, I think I understand it. :)
For those who've forgotten, I am TNF!
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Riikka
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Female

what did you get out of it?
no reason for one...
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Midori
Lookie im cute! *swishes tail*

Jet has given me permission to reply in this topic
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ZOMGs I love this poem
this is amazing

this isnts crud sillys

I especially love the last two stanzas, becuase guess understand them very well, ands can relate

but i cant express how much i LOVES that last stanza xD!
Definitly nice job *thumbs up and a hug*
Riikka is my lovable Kitty-Girl xD *nuzzles giving a slight kiss*Posted Image
Cyber Bro: Tailsneverfails
Cyber Sis: La Koda
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Posted Image ITS ME xD Posted Image AND My Fursona! xD
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My Deviantart page xD
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Ranger Flare
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Hedgehog, Ranger Flare

Could you maybe explain it to me, cause i have no idea what it means...
Posted Image - Don't mess with Chuck Norris there is another fist behind his beard...
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Tails is a Legend
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"Kah-Bewm!"

A lesson I learnt a while ago was to never hold back on posting your work! People may like it more than you do. I liked it you know.
My old signature was seriously cringe-worthy.
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Riikka
Member Avatar
Female

this got more replies o.0

i should post the slightly updated version.....


and i will gladly explain it in a minute



hahahah one day more and this would have been a bump! SWEET!
no reason for one...
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Maxwell The Pirate
Member Avatar


Its good. I wont go into more detail....mainly because theres always that slim chance that what I get out of poetry is completely, utterly, terribly wrong from the actual idea.
But yeah! Looks good!
Don't hate me because who I am, hate me because I'm a Pirate! MWHAHAHAH!
But lets be serious for a moment. Real Pirates are scary.....very, very scary....

Poetic Superior-Riikka
Unequalled Cheeryness-Green The Demon Fox
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Riikka
Member Avatar
Female

thank you very much for the reply, foxton. it means i dont have to edit the last post i made ;).

well what i get from this is that a person is questioning another. he is asking why that person gives lets others walk over him. he may want to just make everyone happy, but not everyone can be happy. that being that when he makes the rest happy, he slowly dies from the growing load of depression packed onto his back.

the speaker goes on to ask why the person wont just let him be his stregth, or help him in need. so he says he is tired, filled with frustration. he just wants to sleep, and to forget about the world that plaques him with its realities. in the end he reassure that no matter how far gone he is, he will always listen to the person, and help them in any way.

thats what i got, but what did you guys get from it?
no reason for one...
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Shifty Powers
Member Avatar
I'm no hero.

Mmm, nice poem indeed. You have to re-read it one-two times to understand it.

You already explained its meaning, so... I don't know what to say more. ^^;
Liberate your mind.
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Riikka
Member Avatar
Female

ah, but shifty, that would only be my interpertation of the poem. poetry can be seen many ways.
no reason for one...
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Shifty Powers
Member Avatar
I'm no hero.

Well, but your views and mine are so similar. ^^; But, okay, I'll say mine.

As Riikka said, it handles about a person, who wants everyone in his surroundings to be happy, and does everything to make them happy. But, he forgets himself, slowly gets tired, and falls into depressions. Because not everyone can be happy.
Liberate your mind.
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Riikka
Member Avatar
Female

so you see it as one person. iteresting way to see it. i agree with it :)
no reason for one...
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