| A Not So Happy Ending...; POTW, I | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jun 21 2016, 09:42 PM (24 Views) | |
| Kage | Jun 21 2016, 09:42 PM Post #1 |
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The Incomparable
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![]() Buffalo Public Library 1 Lafayette Square, Buffalo, New York Tuesday, June 21st 2:44 PM (The scene fades in. In this day and age the place in which we find ourselves has a different feel and a different look than it did merely a decade ago. Computers and digital media rooms cover most of the landscape that were once inhabited by large reading circles and rows of bookshelves that seemed to go on forever. A Tim Hortons coffee shop has a bustling business in one corner while a large movie screening room grabs the attention of visitors in another. However, there is still one corner of the large library that seems to have been left untouched by the hands of time, the children's section. That just so happens to be where we find ourselves at this very moment, but there are no children to be found, quite the opposite actually. We find only one man, he is sitting by himself on the floor, he is the self-proclaimed hometown hero, he is ‘The Incomparable’ Chris Kage. The EWA World Heavyweight Champion is wearing a black tee-shirt with the words “The Incomparable” etched across the front, dark jeans, and his normal black work boots. The World title strap is draped over a nearby chair, while Kage is flipping through the pages of a book he has resting on his lap. As we zoom in we can make out the title of the book Kage is currently engrossed in; “The Golden Book of Fairy Tales.” Finally acknowledging our presence, he looks up and begins to speak.) Chris Kage: I've always enjoyed the purity and honesty that these children's fairy tales bring with them. Although, I do believe they all share the same inherent flaw; they offer the same false sense of reality that seems to be crushing our society every single day. Kids read these “stories” of magical forces and beings, they witness improbable events leading to the happiest of outcomes. A fairy tale by its very definition is meant to mislead its readers, offer a reality that was never fortuitous, a con if you will. But we continue to line these stories up and parade them out in front of our children. And what has that given us? A society where we all believe everything is going to turn out for the best, because a happy ending is inevitable. A society where we embrace men like Azrael Goeren, a man who has lived his life wading through the waters of corruption and treachery, because at the end of the day he is perceived as a “good guy.” A society where we applaud a woman like Laura Seton, a woman who has been gifted every opportunity she has had in this business, simply because she is the ultimate underdog. The people in this society have become so conditioned by this idea of a fairy tale, that they have become blind to their own reality. They'd rather live in a reality where being the best makes you the villain. A reality where telling the truth labels you as a miscreant. A reality where doing what's necessary identifies you as the heel. I accept every title they want to place on me with a smile and a chuckle. I hear and see everything, I know what the internet trolls are saying, I know they don't believe in anything I have accomplished thus far. And that's just fine. I am not the problem ladies and gentlemen. You are. The people, the fans, the masses, you are the problem. You are the ones that hold people like Azrael Goeren and Laura Seton up, give them accolades they never earned and engorge their egos to point they actually believe they belong. It's your fault. So in the fairy tale that is the EWA we have your two heroes, and we have your villain. The obvious outcome is one of the two heroes will enjoy their happy ending. The villainous Chris Kage will fall, and the masses will rejoice. I'm sure it's already been written that way, because it's easy, because it's the most logical outcome...right? Not this fucking time The big bad wolf is going to eat these fucking pigs. The troll is going to tear these billy goats apart limb from limb. Rumplestiltskin is going to steal their babies, and fuck their wives. And I assure you this hunter is going to slay bambi and thumper with his smoking twenty-two. There is no happy ending, there is only THE ending. The ending where the best in this business shows exactly why he is the EWA World Heavyweight Champion. The ending where Chris Kage once again rises above insurmountable odds and proves once again that he is… The Incomparable (Kage stands up and sets the book on a nearby table. He grabs his title belt, tosses it over his shoulder and begins to walk back through the giant library. We pace ourselves in front of Kage and he continues his soliloquy.) Chris Kage: As you look around this place you can see how much it has changed over time. We used to come to a place like this to look for different literary works, whether it be for work or for pleasure, this was where you came. Now it's simply a quiet place for people to come grab a coffee and sink into the digital world. Time seems to change everything and everyone. Everything that is, but our legacies. That's what this match is all about for me. My legacy. While these other two ass clowns continue to pander to the idiots and talk about their divine right to this title and how it will somehow define their pathetic existences. I stand with one goal in mind, and that goal is cementing the legacy which I began building almost sixteen years ago. While Azrael Goeren was busy being a terrible son and horrible father, I was building one of the greatest factions in wrestling history. While Laura Seton was busy deep throating Dubelicious on her way to barely mattering in this circuit, I was becoming a World Champion. Yet the outside world wants to act as if it this moment belongs Azrael Goeren and Laura Seton. I can assure you...it does not. The odds are stacked against me, sure, there is no doubt about that. But the odds are no different than they have been my whole career. Whether it was “The Final Solution” in New York, or “The Asylum” in Mexico...there is always a mountain to climb. But one thing continues to stay true… I always reach the summit first. I always win. Now Azrael and Laura have bitched and whined about this that and the other. Giving excuse after excuse as to why they should be where I am. Excuses. That's all they have. What do I have? Well… This of course. (Kage holds up his EWA World Heavyweight Title, and gives it a nice lil smooch, before tossing it back on his shoulder.) Chris Kage: If the bitches want to cry about how I got here, about how I won the title, well they have had every opportunity to take it from me, haven't they? But plain and simply, they couldn't get the job done. Everything I have done, EVERYTHING I HAVE DONE to keep this title… ...has been what was necessary. The EWA machine has tried at every turn to find a way to keep my family and I down, and this match is no different. I don't even have to be fucking pinned to lose my goddamn title!! (Suddenly a small woman with amazingly sexy horn rimmed glasses appears from out of nowhere.) Sexy Librarian: (whispering) Sir...sir, can you please stop yelling obscenities. That type of language is not tolerated here. Please. (A look of bewilderment shoots across the face of the champ.) Chris Kage: Are you talking to me? Sexy Librarian: Yes, please, sir. Chris Kage: Bitch...do you know who you're talking to? Sexy Librarian: (pauses) Ummm...some guy carrying around a giant shiny belt, talking to some guy holding a camera. No, I haven't a clue who you are sir, and frankly I don't care. Stop cursing or get out of my library, or I will be forced to call the authorities. Chris Kage: Damn girl, you got some balls. Do you happen to know Laura Seton? Sexy Librarian: What? No, I have no idea who that is. Chris Kage: Ah don't worry sugar tits, I was just being silly. We’re out of here anyways. (The sexy librarian stomps her feet, gives out a groan and storms away as Kage giggles over his most recent interaction.) Chris Kage: As I was saying. This match is yet another example of this corrupt organization trying to screw me over. But you see what the machine doesn't realize is...we always have a plan. We are always two steps ahead of them. (Kage smiles.) You won't even see it coming. We have prepared for every outcome possible. If Azrael And Laura want to climb on someone's back and ride their way to the top they need to look elsewhere. I am the world champion. I am the best in the business. I am the Incomparable. As for you two fuck sticks...well… ...You've Already Lost… (Kage finally makes his way to the door and exits. The scene fades out.) Edited by Kage, Jun 21 2016, 09:58 PM.
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10:51 AM Jul 11