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| O Toon, Where Are Thou?; A parody of a George Clooney film | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Oct 1 2006, 01:53 PM (826 Views) | |
| Movie-Man | Oct 1 2006, 01:53 PM Post #1 |
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Author's Note: This my first try at a parody, I'll be doing a few others including a possible parody called Toon Plane because of a few alterations with various scenes and characters but anyway enjoy this fic and good luck reading it. The story begins in the middle of nowhere well sort of, just a road and there are basically various cartoon characters are prisoners basically a chain gang so they're just hitting rocks with sledgehammers and the Clone Troopers since they're the guards so they have to keep an eye on them and the prisoners are the Batman villains mostly at Arkham Asylum including Superman villains like Lex Luthor, Livewire, Parasite, etc. and they're also singing a tune. O muse! Sing in me, and through me tell the story Of that man skilled in all the ways of contending... A wanderer, harried for years on end... However, the Clone Troopers noticed 3 convicts mising from the chain gang so an alarm is sounded. And the three convincts are thankfully far away from where the Clone Troopers are but the only drawback is that their legs are chained and the three convincts are Ulrich Stern, Toji Suzuhara and Beast Boy, so far they avoided being caught by the Clone Troopers, ate someone's crops and they're running to get a train, Ulrich is the first to jump on one of the carts and he sees a bunch of hobos who are Sora and Kairi from Kingdom Hearts, Khyron and Azonia from Robotech/Macross, including Mad Mod and Mumbo from Teen Titans. Ulrich: Say, uh, any a you boys smithies? (No answer) Or, if not smithies, were you otherwise trained in the (Toji jumps on and Beast boy tries tp keep up) metallurgic arts before straitened circumstances forced you into a life of aimless wandering? Beast Boy trips so Toji is yanked away and Ulrich yanked away as well, he tries to stay on teh cart but couldn't and the other characters don't bother to help, so all three convincts roll doll a hill but when they stop, they got up back on their feet. Ulrich: Jesus, can't I count on you two? Beast Boy: Sorry dude. Ulrich: All right, if we take off through that bayou- Toji: Wait a minute, who elect you leader of thsi outfit? Ulrich: Well Toji, I figured it should be the one with the capacity for abstract thought. But if that ain't for the consensus view, then hell, let's put it to a vote. Beast Boy: Sweet! I'm voting for you dude! Ulrich: Well I'm voting for yours truly too. So Toji, what do you say? Beast Boy: Yeah dude, go with Ulrich. Toji: Alright, I'm in, I'm voting for yours truly. They hear something and it turns out, they're seeing The Question from Justice League Unlimited on a human propelled flatcar on the tracks, all three convincts got on the flat car. Ulrich: Mind if we join you? The Question: Join me, children. Toji: Work for the railroad grandpa? The Question: I work for no man. Beast Boy: Well, do you have a name dude? The Question: I have no name. Ulrich: Well, that right there may be why you've had difficulty finding gainful employment. Ya see, in the mart of competitive commerce in Toon Town, the- The Question: You seek a great fortune, you three who are now in chains And you will find a fortune though it will not be the fortune you seek. But first, first you must travel a long and difficult road, a road fraught with peril and pregnant with adventure. You shall see things wonderful to tell. You shall see a cow on the roof of a cottonhouse and so many startlements. I cannot say how long this road shall be. But fear not the obstacles in your path, for Fate has vouchsafed your reward. And though the road may wind, and your hearts grow weary, still shall follow the way, even unto your salvation. The three convincts get confused by this, not just how he knows that they're in chains but what he said. A/N: Well that's the first chapter Beast Boy: Is that all? Me: No, there's more but tell you what, go watch the film to know more about what I'm doing with this parody. |
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| Movie-Man | Oct 2 2006, 01:22 PM Post #2 |
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An hour later, Ulrich, Toji and Beast Boy left the flatcar wondering about what The Question said. Beast Boy: How did he know about the treasure? Ulrich: Don't know, Gar though the superhumans are reputed to possess sensitivities compensating for their lack of ordinaryness or somehting, even to the point of developing the ability to see the future. Now clearly, seeing the future would fall neatly into that ka-taggery. It's not so surprising, then, if an organism deprived of earthly vision- Toji: But he said we wouldn't get the treasure we seek. Ulrich: Well he's just ignorant that's all. Jesus, Toji, I'm telling you I buried the damn treasure myself, and if your friend still runs his war farm and has a forge and some weapon bullets to restore our liberty of movement- Then somebody fires and it almost hit the three convincts but it didn't and it turns out it was Hikari Horaki another character from Neon Genesis Evangelion fired and it looks like she was guarding a house. Hikari: Hold it right there! You boys from the bank? Toji: You Kensuke's girl? Hikari: Yes sir, he told me to shoot someone from the bank. Ulrich: We're not the bank lady. Hikari: He also told me to shoot people who have papers Beast Boy: We don't have papers dude. Hikari: Well, I'll let that one slide. Toji: Good girl. Hey, is Kensuke here? Hikari: (Pointing) He's in the back of the house In the backyard of the house, Kensuke is fixing up a WWII tank to keep it in good shape but then he sees Toji, Ulrich and Beast Boy walking towards him. Kensuke: Hey Toji, nice to see you. Who are your friends? Ulrich: Allow me to introduce ourselves. My name's Ulrich Stern, the green guy is Garfield Logan and of course you already know Toji Suzuhara. Toji: How are you doing Kensuke? How long has it been? Twelve or thirteen years? Kensuke: (Looks at Toji) You've grown chatty. (Looks at Ulrich, Toji and Beast Boy's chains) I'm guessing you want those chains off right? Later that night, the convicts including Hikari and Kensuke are eating stew and Kensuke and Toji are having a conversation. Toji: And what happened to that pink dog Courage? Kensuke: He ran away, I'm guessing he got scared of the tanks, helicopters and other war weapons I was fixing up because he thought they were monsters so he ran through the fence and never came back. Toji: And my sister? Kensuke: Couldn't say. Your sister up and R-U-N-N-O-F-T. Ulrich: Must've been looking for answers. Toji: Do miss her though ever since that Great Toon War. Beast Boy: You know dude, this stew is great, how'd you made it? Kensuke: Think so? I slaughtered a horse last Tuesday, I think the horse is starting to go bad. Beast Boy hears this so he freaks out and vomits on the floor. After dinner, the convincts are in new clothes and are no longer in chains or wearing prison gear and they're listening to the radio that features something called The Scrooge McDuck Flour Hour. Scrooge McDuck: Well, that's the last number for tonight's Pass the Biscuits Mr. McDuck Flour Hour. This is Scrooge McDuck, hoping you folks been enjoying that good old-timey music, and remember, when you're fixing to fry up some haggis or bake a mess of biscuits, use cool clear water and good pure Scrooge McDuck flour for that 'Pass the Biscuits, Mr. McDuck' flavor. So tune in next week folks, and till then watch turn to your better half and sing along with me: You are my sunshine, my only sunshine... Ulrich: Well, I guess we'll be sleeping for the night, you got a bed Kensuke? Kensuke: Yeah, in the attic. It's now midnight, and the convincts are asleep only to be awaken by the sound of a commanding voice. Voice: We got you surrounded. The convincts keep up, look outside and they see Kensuke and a group of Clone Troopers armed and ready to kill or capture. Comamnder Cody: Come out with your hands up. Ulrich: Damn, we're in a tight spot! Commander Cody: Don't try anything clever, as I said we've got your surrounded. Beast Boy: What the hell? Ulrich: Kensuke's turned us in for the bounty. Toji: The hell you say? Kensuke is a traitor? Kensuke: Sorry Toji, I had to say something besides these guys mean business. Toji: Kensuke you stupid four-eyed son of a bicth! I'M GONNA KILL YOU! Ulrich and Beast Boy grab Toji and they duck for cover as lasers shoot at the attic. Ulrich: Damn, we're in a tight spot! Commander Cody: Last chance, surrender or we'll capture you by force. Ulrich: (To the Clone Troopers) Now guys, we can talk about this, we can negociate. Beast Boy: Good idea dude. Toji: You won't take us alive troopers! Ulrich: Don't intimidate them! Commander Cody: Damn it! Burn the fucking house! Clone Trooper: Yes sir. A Clone Trooper inserts a red cartalage into the gun, the trooper pulls the trigger at the titc, the cartalage breaks through the attic window, lands on a box, beings to overheat and a fire starts. Ulrich: Oh s***. I hate fire! Beast Boy: Any ideas dude? Toji: (To the Clone Troopers) You stupid cowardly assholes! Ulrich: Can you please make them not kill us! (To the Clone Troopers) Careful with the fire boys! Can't we talk about this? Then the attic starts to burn, they were almost goners until the Troopers and Kensuke see a runaway car heading towards the burning house. Commander Cody: What the hell? Then they see that the car is heading towards the Troopers first and fast. Commander Cody: Out of the way! Everyone moves out of the way, and the car goes through the house and stops and it turns out Hikari is driving. Hikari: Get in boys! I'm gonna R-U-N-N-O-F-T! Beast Boy: (Gets inside the car along with Toji and Ulrich) Shouldn't you be in bed? Hikari: Hang on! She shifts gears, everyone except Hiakri scream for theit lives as the car burst through the back of the house. The next morning, Hikari is now on the road since the convincts decide to steal the car. Hikari: You son of b**** car theives, I'll get you stooges for this! Toji: Go and mind Kensuke! (Throws a rock but misses, walks over to Ulrich and Beast Boy and sees the hood of the car smoking) What's the problem? At a nearby gas station, Panthro from Thundercats is taking a look at the problem with the car and said his conclusion. Panthro: Well, the bad news is that it'll take two weeks to repalce this broken part of the vehicles since it's being sent from the eastern part of Toon Town. But the good news is your promade. Ulrich: Two weeks? That won't be good for me! Panthro: I'm not The Flash, it's not like I'll go get that part from Eastern part of Toon Town in about 5 seconds. Ulrich: Never mind. (Looks at the pomade) What a second, this is Bugs, I wanted Daffy Duck pomade. Panthro: I don't carry Daffy Duck, I carry Bugs. Ulrich: Damn it! I did not want Bugs! Panthro: Watch your language kid! This is a public gas station, but if you want Daffy Duck I'll have it here in a couple of weeks. Ulrich: Just forget it ok! Outside, Toji and Beast Boy are eating tofu on a stick and they're cooking the tofu and twig fire. Ulrich: Well we have no car, since the idiot said it'll take two weeks to find a sutible part. Beast Boy: Ok dude. Tofu? Ulrich: And no transmission belt for two weeks neither. Toji: Wait! They dam the river on the 21st, today's the 17th! Ulrich: You think? Toji: How the hell are we going to get there? We got four days to get to that treasure before it's on the bottom of the lake. Ulrich: But I have a plan, For transporation that is, we'll just have to sell the car. I figured it could only have painful associations for Kensuke. (Throws a gold watch at Toji and he reads the inscription) Toji: To Kensuke. From his loving sister. Ay-More Fie-dellis. (Finishes) My sister! You stole from my friend! Ulrich: Who betrayed us. Toji: You didn't know back then. Ulrich: So I borrowed it 'till I did know. Toji: That doesn't make any sense! As Ulrich says something, people in robes in large numbers walk by and they're singing. Ulrich: Toji, it's a fool's look for logic in the chambers-What the hell's that singing? (Ulrich, Toji and Beast Boy look at the mysteriosu robe wearing people who are actually Jedi) Beast Boy: Must be a ceremony. (To the Jedi) Care for some tofu? Jedi: Oh Toons, let's go down, come on down, don't you wanna go down. Oh Toons, let's go down, down to the river to pray. Oh, Toons, let's go down, come on down, don't you want to go down. We went down to the river one day, Studying about that good old way, And who shall wear that robe and crown, Oh Force, show us the way. The convincts went to the left side of the lake and see the Jedi being baptised by Yoda. Ulrich: I guess hard times flush the chumps. Everybody's looking for answers, and there's always- Beast Boy dives into the lake, turns into a pleasaur and swims to where Yoda is who is baptising the Jedi to become one with the force. Ulrich: Where the hell's he going? Beast Boy turns back into human form and Yoda dips him deep into the lake brings him back up and he's fully baptised. Toji: Well I'll be a son of a bicth, Garfield's been saved! Beast Boy: (To Toji and Ulrich swimming back) That's it guys! I've been redeemed. The Jedi Master washed away all my sins and transgressions! I've become one with the force! The ways of the Jedi are my everlasting reward! Ulrich: Gar, what are you talking about? We got bigger fish to fry. Beast Boy: The Jedi said, that all my sins are washed away including that diggly wiggly I knocked over at Toon York City! Ulrich: I thought you were innocent of those charges? Beast Boy: Uh, well I was lying but that sin's washed away too! Come on boys, the water's fine. Toji gets excited by this so he swims towards Yoda and gets baptised as well. A/N: Well that's it for the second chapter that is. Next is the chapter featuring another character and everyone's favorite song from the movie. Beast Boy: Which one? Me: You'll see. |
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| Movie-Man | Oct 3 2006, 01:54 PM Post #3 |
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After Ulrich, Toji and Beast Boy left the woods, Clone Troopers including three Clone Troopers on Clone Personal Walkers surveyed the area and they easily found out that the convincts were here. Clone Trooper: They were definately here, and from the looks of things they knew we were coming but we can still track them, let's keep moving. (The Clone Troopers and the walkers got back on walking and searching for the convicts) Back on the road, the convincts have a new car and they're traveling down the road to find the treasure. Toji: The Small Green Jedi said it absolved us. Ulrich: For him, not for the law! I'm surprised at you, Toji. Hell, I gave you credit for more brains than Garfield here. Beast Boy: But there were witnesses, they saw us redeemed! Ulrich: That's not the point, Gar. Even if it did put you square with the Jedi, the town of Toon Town is more hardnosed. Toji: You should've joined us, you could've been saved hell the Jedi guys could've gave you advice. Beast Boy: And the lake could've put out the smell of pomade. Ulrich: And join you two ignorant fools in a ridiculous ceremony? Thank you anyway. And I like the smell of my hair treatment, the pleasing odor is half the point. Beast Boy: Yo dude, pull over. There's an anime babe on the side of the road. Ulrich stops the car and he sees the anime babe is Nadia from the popular Anime Nadia: The Secret of Blue Water and she's wearing the same dress seen in the first episode but the only difference is that she's holding a guitar. Nadia: You boys going through Toonamingo? Ulrich: Sure, hop in. Nadia opens the door, seats on the seat next to Beast Boy and the car drives off. Ulrich: How are you doing? My name's Ulrich Stern and these two soggy son of a bitches are Toji Suzuhara and Garfield Logan. I suggest you should keep your fingers away from Toji's mouth, he hasn't eaten anything for thirteen years but prison food, tofu and a little greasy horse. Nadia: My name is Nadia, thank you for inviting me into your vehicle. Beast Boy: You know Nadia, just out of curiousity, what are you doing in the middle of nowhere anyway? Nadia: I had to be at the crossroads last midnight to sell my soul to the devil. Ulrich: Well ain't it a small world, Toji and Gar have just been baptised and saved, I guess I'm the only one here who remains unaffiliated! (Laughs) Beast Boy: It ain't a laughing matter dude. Ulrich: Say Nadia, what did the devil gave you for your soul? Nadia: He taught me to play this guitar real good. Beast Boy: (Horrified) Oh dude! You traded that for your everlasting soul! Nadia: I wasn't using it. Toji: I always wondered what the devil looked like. Ulrich: Well, of course there's all manner of lesser imps and demons, Toji, but the Great Satan hisself is red and scaly with a bifurcated tail, carries a pitchfork and has a son named Damien Thorn. Nadia: Oh no, he's white as you folks and he doesn't have a son named Damien. Toji: And he told you to go to Toonamingo? Nadia: No sir, that was my idea. I heard there's a man there who pays folks money to record a song. They say he pays extra if you play real good. Ulrich: (Gets an idea and Smiles) How much does he pay? It turns out Toonamingo is a record company with a huge antenna, the car pulls over to the record company and they prepare to set foot inside. Ulrich: (To Toji, Beast Boy and Nadia) Just follow my lead. (Goes inside) Who's the head honcho around here? The owener comes and it's Hudson from Gargoyles only except that he's totally blind. Hudson: I' am. Who are you? Ulrich: Sir, my name is Bob Kane and my accosiates names escape me but we are The Soggy Bottom Guys and One Girl out of Toon Town. We have heard you pay good money for recording a simple song. Hudson: Depends, you Anime toons? Ulrich: Sir, we are Anime toons all except my girl accosiate. Hudson: I'm not looking for Anime songs, I'm looking for something old timey, like something old. Why, lads and laddies just can't get enough of it since we started broadcasting The Scrooge McDuck Flour Hour, so thanks for stopping by, but- Ulrich: Sir, we can do any song especially something in fact we're silly with it (To Toji, Beast Boy and Nadia) Ain't that right? Toji: Yup, yes sir. Beast Boy: And we're not really Anime toons except our girl accosiate. They have been granted permission to record a song, now they're in the recording studio, they are now recording their song with Nadia playing the guitar real good and the song they chose to sing is Toon of a Constant Sorrow. Ulrich: (Singing) I am a toon of constant sorrow I've seen trouble all my day. I bid farewell to old France The place where I was born and raised. Toji and Beast Boy: (Singing) The place where he was born and raised. Ulrich: (Singing) For six long years I've been in trouble No pleasures here on earth I found For in this world I'm bound to ramble I have no friends to help me now. Toji and Beast Boy: (Singing) He has no friends to help him now. Ulrich: (Singing) It's fare thee well my old lover I never expect to see you again For I'm bound to ride that northern railroad Perhaps I'll die upon this train. Toji and Beast Boy: (Singing) Perhaps he'll die upon this train. Ulrich: (Singing) You can bury me in some deep valley For many years where I may lay Then you may learn to love another While I am sleeping in my grave. Toji and Beast Boy: (Singing) While he is sleeping in his own grave. Ulrich: (Singing) Maybe your friends think I'm just a stranger My face you'll never see no more. But there is one promise that is given I'll meet you on God's golden shore. Toji and Beast Boy: (Singing) He'll meet you on God's golden shore. They stopped singing, Nadia finishes palying the guitar and the recording is finished. Ulrich: (Impressed) Hot damn Nadia! I almost believed you sold your soul to the devil! Hudson: That was some fine singing, tell you what, sign these papers and collect your ten dollars. Ulrich: Okay sir but Bob and Kane have to scratch Xes, only four of us can write. After that, they're outside cheering and hollowing after just what happened but as they walk back to their car, an old 1930's limo pulls over and out comes Scrooge McDuck himself and his partners and newphew Donald Duck, Launchpad McQuack and Darkwing Duck. Ulrich: YEAH! Alright! Toji: We scored! Beast Boy: (To Scrooge McDuck and the other ducks) Yo dudes! There's a guy in there who can pay you ten dollars to record a song! Scrooge McDuck: I'm not here to record a song you dumb cracker, they broadcast me on the radio. Donald Duck: (To Ulrich, Toji, Beast Boy and Nadia) That is Scrooge McDuck you're talking to, he's the Governor of Toon Town. Launchpad McQuack: He would sure appreciate it if you vote for him for a second term. He's the finest governor Toon Town ever had Darkwing Duck: In any part of Toon Town. Donald Duck: Aern't you gonna press the flesh, do a little politicking Uncle Scrooge? Scrooge McDuck: I'll press your flesh (Whacks him with his cane) you dimwitted son of a b****! You don't tell me who to get someone to vote for me! That's the toons decision! If your mother were still alive she'd die in shame! Later that night, the Soggy Bottom Boys and One Girl are sitting at a campfire near an abandoned barn, with Nadia playing with her guitar who is actually playing a slowed down version of the theme song to Nadia: The Secret of Blue Water. Toji: Why don't we sleep for the night? Beast Boy: Yeah, it stinks in that barn. Ulrich: Pretty soon it'll be nothing but feather beds and silk sheets. Toji: A million dollars. Ulrich: Million point two. Beast Boy: Five hundred thousand. Ulrich: Try four million. Beast Boy: Is that right? Voice: We have you surrounded! The commanding voice startled the convincts and the girl, they look up except Nadia who actually ran away after she heard the voice and it turned out that the Clone Troopers are there at the abandoned barn. Commander Cody: Come out with your hands up! Ulrich: Damn! They found our car! Commander Cody: You have a choice, come out quietly or we'll do it by force. Beast Boy: We gotta get out of here! Ulrich: I left my pomade in the car! Maybe I can- Toji: Don't try it, they'll see you! We need to leave and pronto! Ulrich: Where's Nadia? Toji: Already scared of her wits, let's go! So the convicts left unnoticed by the Clone Troopers but by the next day, they'll come across somebody else. A/N: Well that's it, get ready for another chapter where a character takes the role of George Nelson. Beast Boy: I know! It's-(Toji and Ulrich cover his mouth) Me: Thanks, anyway can you guess which character will play George Nelson? |
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| Movie-Man | Oct 3 2006, 03:20 PM Post #4 |
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The next day, the three convincts are now back on the road, sort of it's just that they have no car this time. Toji: The hell it ain't sqaure one! Nobody is going to pick up three filthy kid hitchhikers, and one of them is a know-it-all who can't shut the f*** up! Ulrich: Toji, the personal rancor reflected in that remark I don't intend to dignify with comment, but I would like to address your general attitude of hopeless negativism. Consider the lilies of the goddamn field, or hell, take a look at Gar here as your paradigm a hope. Beast Boy: Yeah dude look at me! Ulrich: Now you may call it an unreasoning optimism. You may call it obtuse. But the plain fact is we still have close to... (Sees a speeding motorcycle) close to three days before they dam that river... The motorcycle stops by where Ulrich, Toji and Beast Boy are and the rider is non other than Johnny Rancid, a villain from Teen Titans. Johnny Rancid: Is this the road to Toona Betta? Toji: Toona Betta? A dozen dollar bills fly in the air, Beast Boy grabs one and he sees that it really is a dollar bill but in Toon Town, the money is different, they all have Scrooge McDuck's face on it and Beast Boy sees that there are 5 sacks of money tied up to the back part of Johnny Rancid's bike. Ulrich: Toona Betta, now that would be... Toji: Isn't it...? Then Beast Boy sees a police car coming towards them and fast and it turns out it's a Gotham Police Car from Batman: The Animated Series. Ulrich: Now it should be... Toji: No that's it! Johnny Rancid: Just get on and tell me on the way. Beast Boy: (To Johnny Rancid) But, you don't have any more room. Johnny Rancid presses a button, and an addtional seat of seats come out attached to the bike. Johnny Rancid: We do now. (The bike speeds off) Any of you guys know your way around Burton TTK? Beast Boy: Don't know, not sure if it's in Toon Town. (Sees the money flying out one by one) Uh dude, I think your money's flying away. Johnny Rancid: Don't worry about that, whatever's left will last me enough. I take it you guys aren't villains. Beast Boy: Funny you should ask, we were bad until yesterday. Toji: Basically he's saying that we got saved yesterday. Beast Boy: Right, anyway I'm Garfield Logan and that's Toji and that's Ulrich. Johnny Rancid: Johnny Rancid, a pleasure too meet you fuckers. (To Ulrich) Grab on to my bike will ya? Ulrich and Johnny Rancid switch seats so Ulrich is driving the motorcycle and Johnny Rancid is in the back but backwards because he's facing the police car with an evil smile on his face. Johnny Rancid: (To Beast Boy) Hand me the uzi will ya? Beast Boy: Sure dude. (Passes him an uzi gun) Say Dude, what line of work are in? Johnny Rancid: Come and get me you SORRY SON OF BITCHES! (Fires the uzi gun like crazy) You can't catch me! I'm Johnny Rancid! And I'm feeling fifty feet tall! (Laughs) And I'm MAD AS HELL! (Shoots again but now he sees cows) Cows... I hate cows worse than coppers! (Fires at the cows) Beast Boy: DUDE! Not the livestock! Johnny Rancid: Come and get me assholes! The entire cows is running but the police car broadsides a cow. A few minutes later, Johnny Rancid and the convicts stopped by small town called Toona Betta so they stopped by a bank called The Toona Betta National Bank. Johnny Rancid: (To the convicts) COME ON BOYS! We're going for a world record! We're going to rob five banks in three hours! Johnny Rancid bursts into the bank with the convicts following him, he shoots at the ceiling just to give various toons a scare but it doesn't really phase the toon customers. Johnny Rancid: Hold the applause and dump your cash! I'm Johnny Rancid and I'm here to take your cash! (Takes out a sack) So dump your cash into this sack or else! (Shoots at the celing) Beast Boy: (To Ulrich) Dude's nuts ain't he? Ulrich: Yup. So for a few minutes everyone has dumped their cash into the sack and he also took a sacks of money. Johnny Rancid: Thank you folks! Tell your kids that you were robbed by the best! I'm Johnny Rancid and I'm feeling fifty feet tall! (Laughs) Remember, Jesus Saves, but Johnny Rancid withdraws! But then suddenly, Mrs. Possible, mother of Kim Possible tells her husband a nickname that Johnny Rancid isn't too pleased about. Mrs. Possible: It's Gray Skinned Rancid. But he hears this and he whrils around in a menacing way. Johnny Rancid: Who the f*** said that? Now the toon customers are scared. Johnny Rancid: What idiot, stupid, slanderising, son of a b**** said that? (To Mrs. Possible, yelling in her face) I'M JOHNNY RANCID! GET ME! Beast Boy: I'm sure they never mean to say anything. Johnny Rancid: I'm Johnny Rancid not Gray Skinned! GET IT! (Shoots at the ceiling) Later that night at a campire in the woods, the convicts actually had a good time with Johnny rancid but Johnny himself however isn't too happy, he's actually gloomy. Beast Boy: (To Johnny Rancid) Some fun wasn't it dude? (Laughs) Johnny Rancid: (Depressed sigh) Yeah. Beast Boy: Almost makes me wish that I wasn't saved. Johnny Rancid: Yeah, I guess. I'm takin' off, take my bike will ya? And go ahead and take this sack of money. (Walks away) Beast Boy: (To Johnny Rancid) Where are you going? Johnny Rancid: Don't know, who cares. Beast Boy: What's eating him? Ulrich: Well Gar, they say that with a thrill-seeking personality, what goes up must come down. Top of the world one minute, haunted by megrims the next. Yep, it's like our friend Johnny is a alley cat and his own damn humor are swinging him by the tail. But don't worry, Gar; he'll be back on top again. I don't think we've heard the last of Johnny Rancid. Beast Boy: Aww, I like Johnny Rancid. The next day, a farmer sees a truck with a picture of Eddy from Ed, Edd n Eddy on it and Stella from Winx Club speaks into a megaphone and it turns out, Eddy is competiting against Scrooge McDuck for governor of Toon Town and the truck is heading to Toonamingo. Stella: Don't be saps for McDuck! Vote for Eddy! He knows what's best for Toon Town and he ain't lying! He'll clean up Toon Town real good! Seconds later, Sparks is talking to Hudson inside the Toonamingo building. Hudson: What can I do for you kind sir? Stella: Do you where I can find the Soggy Bottom Guys and One Girl? Hudson: They were here a few days ago, they did a recording and ran off not to mention that their song is going through the roof! It's a hit! Meanwhile at a music store in Toon Town, Argent from Teen Titans comes in to look for the song Toon of a Constant Sorrow. Argent: (To Dante Hicks) Do you know where I can find Man of a Constant Sorrow by The Soggy Bottom Boys and One Girl? Dante Hicks: Sorry, we had a new shipment but we ran out, toons just kept buying it off the shelves. Argent: Oh well, get me a U2 album instead. Back with the convicts, they had their own mini-adventures while looking for treasure like stealing someone's pie while Beast Boy puts a dollar bill inside someone's house and stealing someone's car for transportation so back on the road while Beast Boy plays with a banjo he found, Toji hears something. Toji: Shut up Beast Boy. (Sees something in the woods) PULL OVER! Ulrich stops the car, Toji gets out of the car fast and he runs off to the woods leaving Beast Boy and Ulrich. Beast Boy: What the hell's his deal? They found Toji staring at something wide eyed and grinning like an idiot and it turns out he's looking at Misato Katsuragi, Asuka Longely Soyhru and Rei Anayami singing and washing their clothes a river stream and apprently their voices have attracted them like what the sirens do to sailors. Misato, Asuka Rei: (Singing) Go to sleep little babe go to sleep little babe. Your momma's gone away and your daddy's gonna stay. Toji: Hello ladies, my name's Toji Suzuhara and uh, I. Misato, Asuka Rei: (Singing) Didn't leave nobody but the baby. Go to sleep little babe go to sleep little babe. Toji: I don't believe I.. heard that song before... (Goes lovestruck) Don't know their names but I saw them first! Misato, Asuka Rei: (Singing) Everybody's gone in the cotton and the corn didn't leave nobody but the baby. Ulrich: (To the "sirens") You'll have to excuse Toji... (Goes lovestruck) Beast Boy: Dude... (Goes lovestruck) Misato, Asuka Rei: (Singing) You're a sweet little babe. (Rei goes near Ulrich) Ulrich: Why thank you that's mighty- Misato, Asuka Rei: (Singing) You're a sweet little babe. (Rei makes Ulrich drink a huge jug of beer) Honey in the rock and the sugar don't stop gonna bring a bottle to the baby. Don't you weep pretty babe, don't you weep pretty babe. She's long gone with her red shoes on gonna need another loving babe. (Misato attempts to seduce Toji while Asuka attempts to seduce Beast Boy) Go to sleep little babe, go to sleep little babe. You and me and the devil makes three don't need no other lovin' babe. (Rei kisses Ulrich, Misato kisses Toji and Asuka kisses Beast Boy) Go to sleep little babe, go to sleep little babe. Come lay bones on the alabaster stones and be my everloving baby. Beast Boy: Dude... A/N: Well that's it but there's still more to come? Beast Boy: Did I just kiss a red hair german girl? Anyway, if you've seen the movie, you can pretty much guess what happened to Toji but if you didn't, there's a surprise. |
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| Movie-Man | Oct 4 2006, 01:24 PM Post #5 |
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An hour later, Beast Boy wakes up after his kiss, he then sees that the "sirens" are gone and he sees Toji lying on the ground but as he wakes up, he founds out that Toji and his clothes are what's left of him. Beast Boy: Holy s*** dude! Ulrich: (Wakes up) Uhh, how's my hair? Beast Boy: (To Ulrich) Look at this! LOOK! Ulrich looks at Toji's clothes however he's not panicked about it. Ulrich: Oh what the hell! TOJI! Toji! We don't got time for your jokes! But Beast Boy sees something odd inside Toji's clothes because something in there is moving. Beast Boy: They left his heart... Ulrich sees this but however whatever is inside is moving and when it reaches outside it turns out that it's a toad and Beast Boy screams at this. Beast Boy: (Screaming) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Ulrich: (Skeptical) What's going on with you? Beast Boy: Don't you see dude? Those sirens did this to Toji! They loved him up and turned him into a... horney toad! The toad then jumps into the river, Beast Boy turns into a Bass (A fish) to get "Toji". Beast Boy: Toji come back! (Turns into a bass and jumps into the river) After a few seconds, Beast Boy caught "Toji" after struggling to find him in a river. Beast Boy: (Changes back into human form) Don't worry dude! It's me, Gar remember? Ulrich and Beast Boy are now back on the road with their car, Ulrich sees Beast Boy whimpering due to teh fact that Toji turned into a toad but Ulrich was still quite skeptical about that. Ulrich: I'm just not sure if that's Toji. Beast boy: Of course it's Toji! Look at him! We gotta find some wizard to change him back! Ulrich: ... I'm just not sure if that's Toji. Meanwhile at a restraunt which is called Porky's Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner diner and inside, Ulrich has put "Toji" inside a shoebox in order to prevent people from being grossed out. Ulrich: (To Beast Boy) You can't display a toad in a restraunt like this, people will freak if they see a toad. Beast Boy: Sorry dude, I just don't think it's right to keep Toji underwraps like we're ashamed of him. Ulrich: Well if that is Toji which I doubt then I' am ashamed of him, the way I see it he totally got what he deserved when he kissed a "siren" which eventually led him to this. (To Minnie Mouse who's a waitress) You'll have to excuse my friend, he's a bit paranoid about the end of the world especially when he thought Damien Thorn from The Omen was real, (Gives her five bucks) here's five bucks to forget the whole thing. On another table, somebody overheard Ulrich and Beast Boy's conversation and saw Ulrich give the waitress five bucks, and this guy is wearing a white suit and has an eye patch on his righte eye and he's quite large and it turns out it's Jim from Code Lyoko, he gets up and he meets Ulrich and Beast Boy. Jim Morales: (To Ulrich and Beast Boy) I don't believe I never seen you boys around here before, allow me to introduce myself. I go by the name of Jimmy Morales or Big Jim Morales or for your amusement, Jimbo toot court. Ulrich: Well hello Big Jim, I'm Ulrich Stern and this is my associate Garfield Logan. I sense that, like me, you are endowed with the gift of gab. Jim: I flatter myself that such is the case; in my line of work it's plumb necessary. The one thing you don't want is air in the conversation. Ulrich: Once again we find ourselves in an agreement. What kind of work do you do, Big Jim? Jim: Sales, Mr. Stern, sales! And what do I sell? The Truth! Every blessed word of it, from the Force on down to the Sith! That's right, the word of the Jedi, which let me add there is damn good money in during these days of woe and want! Toons are looking for answers and Big Jim Morales sells the only book that's got 'em! What do you do? And I do mean you and your green friend? Beast Boy: Uh... Ulrich: We're adventurers, sir, currently pursuing a certain opportunity but open to others as well. Jim: I like your style, young man, so I'm gonna propose you a proposition. You cover my check so I don't have to run back up to my room, have your waitress wrap your lunch picnic style, and we'll retire to more private enviroment where I will explain to you how vast amounts of money can be made in the service of the Amighty Jedi. Ulrich: Well, why not. If nothing else I could use some civilized conversation. Jim: Wait, don't forget your shoebox my friend. As Beast Boy takes the shoebox, there's a conversation going with Scrooge McDuck, Donald Duck, Launchpad McQuack and Darkwing Duck though Beast Boy doesn't pay any attention to it so he leaves the restraunt. Scrooge McDuck: Languishing! Goddamn campaign is languishing! We need a shot in the arm! Hear me, boys? In the goddamn ARM! Election held tomorrow, that son of a b**** Eddy would win it in a walk! Donald Duck: Well he's the reform candidate, Uncle Scrooge. Scrooge McDuck: So? Donald Duck: Well people like him reform, maybe we should get a reform too. Scrooge McDuck: I'll reform you, (Whacks Donald with his cane) you soft headed son of a b****! How are we gonna run reform when we're the damn incumbent? Is that the best idea any you boys can come up with? Reform! Weeping Yoda with a lightsaber! Launchpad, you may as well start drafting my concession speech right now. Launchpad McQuack: Okay Mr. McD. Scrooge McDuck: I'm just making a point (Whacks Launchpad with his cane) you stupid son of a b****! Launchpad McQuack: Okay Mr. McD, (To Donald Duck and Darkwing Duck) he's just making a point. Meanwhile, at a field 20 miles outside the restraunt, Ulrich, Beast Boy and Jim have just finished eating. Jim: Thank you boys for throwing in that fricasee. (Burps) I'm a man with a large appetite and even with lunch under my belt I was feeling a mite peckish. Ulrich: Our pleasure, Big Jim. Jim: And thank you as well for that conversational hiatus; I generally refrain from speech while engaged in gustation. There are those who attempt both at the same time but I find it course and vulgar. Now where were we? Beast Boy: Making money is in the Jedi's service, I think. Jim: You don't say much friend, but when you do it's to the point and I salute you for it. Beast Boy: It's nothing, I- Jim: Yes, Jedi sales. The trade is not a complicated one; there're but two things to learn. One bein' where to find your wholesaler, word of the Jedi in bulk as it were. Two being how to recongnise your customer, who are you dealing with? An exercise in psychology so to speak. (Tears off a very large and hard tree branch from a tree) And it is that which I propose to give you a lesson in right now. Ulrich: I like to think that I'm a pretty astute observer of the human scene. Jim: (Holds the tree branch like a club) No doubt, brother. I figured as much back there in the restaurant. That's why I invited you out here for this advanced tutorial. (Hits Beast Boy hard) Ulrich: (Puzzled smile) What's going on, Big Jim? Beast Boy jumps on Jim's shoulder transformed into a dog, he bites him but with no effect so Jim whacks him again. Ulrich: Uh, what are you doing Big Jim? Jim: It's all about the money, boys! It's all about the money! (Beast Boy bites him again) Atsy answer! (Whacks him again to the ground) Do (Whacks him again) re (Whacks him again) mi! (Whacks him again) Ulrich: I don't get it. Jim: RAHHH! (Whacks Ulrich very hard) Do unto others before they do unto you! (Takes Ulrich and Beast Boy's money, all of it) I'll just take your cash... (Picks up the shoebox) and whatever you got in this shoebox. (Looks inside the shoebox and finds the toad inside) What the? There ain't nothing in here but a little goddamn toad! Beast Boy: That ain't no toad... That's Toji. Jim: Don't you know these things give you warts? (Crushes the toad) Beast Boy: (Gasps) Oh lord... Toji! Jim: (Walks towards the car) End of lesson. So long, boys! See ya in the funny papers! (Laughs and drives off) Beast Boy gets up and weeps upon the dead body of the toad Beast Boy: YOU MANIACS! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL! A/N: Well, things are going bad for Ulrich and Beast Boy. Beast Boy: Of course it's bad! He killed Toji! Me: It's not the end of Toji. Beast Boy: It isn't? Me: Wait until you see Toji's real fate. |
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| Movie-Man | Oct 4 2006, 06:28 PM Post #6 |
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Later that night, somebody is getting is getting whipped and is screaming in pain and it's far from where Beast Boy and Ulrich are and it turns out, the Clone Troopers have captured Toji and one of them is whipping him with a laser whip. Clone Trooper: Where are they? (Whips him again) Toji: (Screwming) AHHHHHHHHH! Clone Trooper: Talk! Talk you worthless faggot! (Whips him again) Toji: (Screaming) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Clone Trooper: Where are they headed? TALK! (Whips him again) Toji: (Screaming) AHHHHHHHH! Clone Trooper: Your screams won't save you kid! Only your tongue will, now talk! (Whips him again) Toji: (Screaming) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Commander Cody: That's enough! (To Toji) Sweet summer rain. Like a Jedi's own mercy. Your two friends have abandoned you, Toji. They don't seem to care about you. Toji: f*** you! (Spits on Commander Cody's chest) Commander Cody: Alright then. (To a Clone Trooper) Bring in the noose. Clone Trooper: Yes sir. The clone Trooper tosses the rope and at the end of the rope is a hole that is the noose. Commander Cody: It's stairway to Heaven, kid. Say hello to Damien when you get there. Toji: God damn it! (Sobbing) Yoda forgive me! The next day, Ulrich and Beast Boy are now on the outside part of a truck driven by Elmer Fudd. Ulrich: Believe me Gar, he would've wanted us to press on. Toji, rest his soul, was one sour assed son of a b**** and not given to acts of pointless sentimentality. Beast Boy: I just don't it's right, digging up that treasure without Toji. Ulrich: Maybe it's for the best that Toji squished. He was barely a sentient being. Now, soon as we clean ourselves up, get a little smell in our hair, we're just gonna feel a hundred percent better about ourselves and about... (Sees the Arkham inmates and the Superman villains) ...and about... life in general. Jesus, we must be near Deadtoon Farm. Sorry son of a bitches, Seems like a year ago we bust off the farm. As the truck is nearly out of the prison farm, Ulrich sees Toji chained next to Poison Ivy and Livewire and he is quite confused by this. Ulrich: (Rubs his eyes) Toji have a brother? Beast Boy: Not that I know of. Ulrich: The heat must be getting to me. A/N: Sorry it's short but I wanted to keep you people pumped up for the next chapter and a small spoiler, Yumi will be in it. Ulrich: She is? Me: Yeah, why? Ulrich: (Blushing) Well, I- Me: Never mind, I can see why anyway, stay tuned for the next chapter. |
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| Movie-Man | Oct 4 2006, 08:48 PM Post #7 |
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At Toon Town, there is something going on there and it turns out, there's an election move being made so there's a stage and banners and posters that say Eddy, friend of the idiots and it turns out, Eddy from Ed, Edd n Eddy is the guy Scrooge McDuck was talking about and he's Scrooge McDuck's competitor for Govenor of Toon Town anyway, Eddy is up on stage with Ed making his speech and the toons who are present are: Grandis, Hanson, Samson, Marco from Sealab 2021, Meatwad, Cyborg, Jumba, Pleakly, Harvey Bullock, and Dave the Barbarian. Eddy: And I say to you that the great city of Toon Town can't afford four more years of Scrooge McDuck, four more years a cronyism, nepotism, rascalism and service to the Innarests! The choice, she's a clear one: Scrooge McDuck, slave of the Innarests; Eddy, servant of the idiots! Ain't that right, mono-brow? Ed: He ain't lying! Eddy: (Pushes Ed aside) When the idiot says jump, Eddy says how high? And, ladies and gentlemen, the idiot has admonished me to grasp the broom of reform and sweep Toon Town clean! (Audience applauds as the truck drops off Ulrich and Beast Boy) It's gonna be back to Scotland, McDuck! The Innarests can take care of themselves! Come Tuesday, we're gonna sweep the rascals out! Clean gummint and yours for the asking! (Audience cheers) And now the little Ishiyama girls! What do you got for us, kids? Lilo: In The Highways Eddy: That's fine. (Walks off) Ulrich: Ishiyama Girls? Did he say Ishiyama girls? (Walks towards the stage) Beast Boy: You know those girls dude? The three girls begin to sing while Ritsuko Akagi plays the guitar. Girls: (Singing) In the Highways, in the hedges I'll be somewhere working for my Lord. If he calls me, I will answer I'll be somewhere working for my Lord. They stop, they see Ulrich and they run up to him also the three girls are Lilo, Marie from Nadia: The Secret of Blue Water and Jade from Jackie Chan Adventures. Marie: Daddy! Lilo: Wait! He isn't our dad! Ulrich: Hell I ain't! What's this "Ishiyama" girls stuff? Your name's Stern! Marie: No sir! Not since you got hit by a train! Ulrich: What are you talking about? I wasn't hit by a train! Lilo: Mom said you were hit by a train! Marie: Splat! Jade: Nothing left! Lilo: Just nothing left but a blood spot on the railroad tracks Ulrich: Damn it, I never been hit by any train! Jade: That's right! So Mom got us back to Ishiyama! Lilo: That's a maiden name. Marie: Do you have a maiden name daddy? Ulrich: No, Daddy doesn't have a maiden name, you see- Lilo: That's your misfortune! Marie: That's right! And now mom's got a new boyfriend! Jade: He's a suitor! Ulrich: Yeah, I know about that. Lilo: Mom... Marie: Says... Jade: He's bonafide. Ulrich: (Worried) Did he give her a ring? Marie: Yes sir, a big one! Lilo: It's a gem too. Jade: Mom checked it. Marie: It's bonafide. Lilo: He's a suitor! Ulrich: What's his name? Lilo: William Dunbarr. Marie: Uncle William. Jade: Until tomorrow. Marie: Then he's going to be our new daddy! Ulrich: I' am the only damn daddy you got! I'm the damn paterfamilias! Jade: But you're not bonafide! Eddy: And now let's fetch back the Ishiyama girls to sing I'll Fly Away. Lilo: She's at Nani's! Marie: Buying nipples! At a store called Nani's, Ulrich goes inside, he sees his three other daughters Milly Solovieff and Tamiya Diop from Code Lyoko and Melvin from the Teen Titans episode Hide and Seek but however he does not recongnise the baby Yumi is holding. Milly: Daddy! Ulrich: Hey sugar! (Hugs her, then let's her go) (To Yumi) Who the hell is that? Yumi: (Re: Yumi's baby) Starla Ishiyama. Ulrich: Starla Stern you mean! How come you never told me about her? Tamiya: Because you were hit by a train. Ulrich: That's another thing, why are you telling our daughtors that I was hit by a train? Yumi: Lots respectable toons have been hit by trains. Tim Drake over in Toonville was hit by a train. What was I supposed to tell them? That you were sent to the Deadtoon farm and I divorced you from shame? Ulrich: Okay, good point but it does leave me in an awkward position. William Dunbarr: Hey! Is he bothering you, Yumi? Ulrich: You Dunbarr? William Dunbarr: Yeah. Ulrich: Have you been using my hair treatment? William: Your hair treatment! Ulrich: Excuse me. (Takes Yumi three feet away from the kids and William) Well, I've got news for you in case you haven't noticed; I wasn't hit by a train. And I've traveled 2,000 miles to be back with my wife and six daughters. Melvin: Seven, daddy. Yumi: That ain't your daddy, Melvin. He was hit by a train. Ulrich: Yumi, you stop that! Yumi: No, you stop that! William has a job. William's got prospects. He's bona fide! What are you? Ulrich: I'll tell you what I am! I'm damn the paterfamilias! You can't marry him! Yumi: I can and I will, tomorrow! I gotta think about the little Ishiyama girls! They look to me for answers! William can support them and buy them lessons on the clarinet! The only good thing you ever did for the girls was getting hit by a train! Ulrich: Why you lying, unconstant, sccubus! William: (To Ulrich) Whoa, whoa, whoa! You can't swear at my fiance! Ulrich: (To William) Oh yeah? Well you can't marry my wife! Then Ulrich and William get into a fist fight, the bystander toons watch in confusion not knowing what's going on. Samurai Jack: (To Yumi) Is that your husband? Yumi: He's not my husband. Just a drifter, I guess... Just some no-account drifter. A few minutes later, Nani from Lilo and Stitch herself throws Ulrich out of the store literally. Nani: ...And stay out of Nani's! (Slams the door) A/N: Well, looks like Yumi's got a new boyfriend but he'll get her back soon, I think. Ulrich: why "you think"? Me: Well, at least in the film, McGill gets his wife back so anyway, stay tuned for the next chapter. |
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| Movie-Man | Oct 5 2006, 08:08 PM Post #8 |
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After Ulrich got kicked out of Nani's, he and Beast Boy are watching a movie are ironically enough, they are watching O Brother, Where Are Thou. Ulrich: Deceitful! Two-faced! She-Woman! Never trust a female, Gar! Remember that one simple precept and your time with me will not have been ill spent! Beast Boy: Okay, dude. Ulrich: Hit by a train my a**! Truth means nothing to Women, Gar. Triumph of the subjective! You ever been with a woman? Beast Boy: Well, I think I'll need a family first before I can think about that. Ulrich: Well that's right, if then! Believe me, Gar, women are the most fiendish instrument of torture ever devised to bedevil the days of man! Beast Boy: Dude, I never thoght you were a paterfamilias. Ulrich: Oh-ho-ho yes, I've spread my seed. And you see what it, uh... what it's earned me-(The movie screen turns off) What the hell? The door opens revealing a Clone Trooper holding a gun and the Arkham inmates and the Superman villains all chained go to their seats and once they found their seats, they sat down queitly and the door closes. Clone Trooper: Alright, enjoy your film. The movie starts up again and the movie resumes its scene but then Ulrich and Beast Boy hear a voice whispering to them. Voice: (Whispering) Do not seek the treasure! They turn around and they see Toji chained next to Poison Ivby and Harley Quinn however due to the interrogation, he looks haunted and traumatised. Ulrich: Toji? Toji: (Whispering) They're preparing an ambush! Do not seek the treasure! Beast Boy: (Whispering) Toji? Toji: (Whispering) Do not seek the treasure! Beast Boy: (Whispering) We thought you were a toad! Toji: Huh? Beast Boy leans closer and whispers to him with hilarious expressions on his face. Beast Boy: (Whispering) We thought... you were... a toad! Apparently Toji did not know what he was talking about but he repeats his warning again. Toji: (Whispering) Do not... seek... the treasure! Clone Trooper: Quiet! Watch the movie! Meanwhile, back with Scrooge McDuck and his associates, they're outside the front porch of his mansion and they're once again talking about the election. Scrooge McDuck: (Pacing) I signed that bill! I signed a dozen of those Wayne Enterprises bills! Everyone knows I'm a friend of Bruce Wayne! What do I have to do? Start working as a paper pusher there? Donald Duck: We can't do that, Uncle Scrooge, we might offend our constichency. Scrooge McDuck: We don't have a constichency! Eddy has a constichency! Launchpad McQuack: Those polls are ugly, that's for sure. Darkwing Duck: Eddy is pulling our pants down. Launchpad McQuack: Gonna pluck us off the tit. Darkwing Duck: Mr. McDuck is going to be sitting their pants down and Eddy at the table sopping up the gravy. Launchpad McQuack: Latch right on to that tit. Darkwing Duck: Wiping little circles with his bread. Launchpad McQuack: Sucking away. Darkwing Duck: Well, it's a well run campaign. Launchpad McQuack: Devil his due. Darkwing Duck: Hell of an organization. Donald Duck: I have an idea! Scrooge McDuck: (Stops pacing) And what would that be? Donald Duck: We can hire our own idiot, even stupidier than Eddy's idiot. Scrooge McDuck: (Hits Donald Duck with his cane) You ignorant slope shouldered sack of haggis! Why we would look like Dreamworks! Ripping off someone else's idea no matter how good it looks! And that's the goddamn problem right there, people think Eddy has fresh ideas, he's the future and we're the past. Launchpad McQuack: Problem of preception. Darkwing Duck: That's right. Launchpad McQuack: Reason why he's pulling our pants down. Darkwing Duck: Going to kick our asses. Launchpad McQuack: Kick it real hard. Darkwing Duck: Literally? Launchpad McQuack: No, as an expression. Darkwing Duck: You're right. Launchpad McQuack: If Eddy wins, he'll do it alright. Darkwing Duck: Pulling our pants down. Launchpad McQuack: Wiping little circles with his bread. A/N: Things don't look good for Scrooge McDuck. Scrooge McDuck: Damn right it is! Me: But his role as governor will be saved, you'll see why in a later chapter but anyway, stay tuned for the next chapter. |
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| Movie-Man | Oct 6 2006, 01:31 PM Post #9 |
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Later that night, at the Deadtoon Farm in doors, the Arkham inmates and the Superman villains are sleeping on bunkbeds and Toji is sleeping on top of one of them. Toji: I could not gaze upon that far shore... What have I done? Yoda forgive me! Then Ulrich comes up and he sees Toji. Ulrich: Toji! (Toji prepares to scream but covers his mouth) We're getting you out of here. Hold still (Takes out a large, long armed, short nosed, pincering tool and cuts off the chains) Beast Boy: Can you hurry a bit dude? Toji: Hurry please! Ulrich: Just qiuet Toji, time to get out of here! A moment later, Toji is three and the three convicts are walking in the woods lit up by moonlight. Toji: The girls then lured me out for a bath, then they dunked me and trussed me up like a hog and turned me in for the bounty. Ulrich: I should've guessed it, typical womanly behavior. We're lucky that we left before they came for us. Beast Boy: We didn't abandon you Toji, we just thought you were a toad. Toji: I was never turned into a toad. Beast Boy: Well that was our mistake then. And then we were beat up by a Jedi salesman and banished from Nani's. I don't know if it's the one branch or all of 'em. Toji: Well, I got worse, I spilled my guts about the treasure. Beast Boy: HUH?! Toji: They almost hanged me! I had to say something, sorry guys. Ulrich: It's alright. Toji: God, what was I thinking? Why did I tell? It's my fault! My fault! Ulrich: Look, it's alright, doesn't matter. Toji: You know one thing Ulrich? You're actually a great guy. Ulrich: Look, I have something to tell you both. Beast Boy: (To Toji) You know dude, you're a great guy too. Toji: Thanks. Ulrich: But Toji, Gar... Toji: You know something Gar... Ulrich: (Clears his throat) Look, the truth is... as a matter of fact, there is no treasure. Toji and Beast Boy: (Stunned) Huh? Ulrich: And there never was. Toji: But... but... Beast Boy: So, where's all the money from your armored car job? Ulrich: I never knocked over any armored car. I was sent to the Deadtoon Farm for practicing law without a license. Toji: But... Ulrich: Damn it! I had to bust out! My wife wrote to me that was getting married, I gotta stop it! Toji: No treasure... I had two weeks left on my sentence. Ulrich: I couldn't wait two weeks, my wife is getting married tomorrow! Toji: With my added time for my escape, I don't get out until 2090, I'll be eighty four years old. Beast Boy: (Not upset) Well, I guess they'll tack on fifty years for me too. Ulrich: Boys, we were chained together. I had to tell you something. Busting out alone was not a option! Toji: Eighty four years old... Beast Boy: (Chuckles) Well, I guess I'll be eighty two. (Toji glares at Beast Boy) Well, there has to be a silver liniing right? (Chuckles) Toji: (Enraged) (To Ulrich) YOU RUINED MY LIFE YOU ASSHOLE! Toji runs up to Ulrich and he punches him, Ulrich gets knocked to the ground, Toji picks him up and punches him again and after that, he starts to choke him. Ulrich: (Gagging) I do apologise, Toji. Toji: Eighty four years old you idiot! I'll be stuck in that damn prison! Then they roll down a hill, Beast Boy and they landed in teh bushes but then they saw a light, a light of torches and it turns out that there is a ceremony that resembles a KKK ceremony and two members of that similar group are dragging Nadia to a burning cross. Nadia: I never harmed any of you! Ulrich: It's Nadia! s*** they got Nadia! Beast Boy: Dude! A/N: Looks like Nadia is in trouble, but soon Ulrich, Toji and Beast Boy come to her rescue. Beast Boy: Do I kiss her in the end? Me: Well, you don't actually. Anyway, stay tuned for the next chapter. |
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| Movie-Man | Oct 7 2006, 01:53 PM Post #10 |
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Despite the fact that the KKK like members have the similar style of clothing like the hoods withe eye holes and such but the colors are different, the outfits have an ink-like color. Nadia: I never harmed anyone! Toji: The nooze! We gotta save her and fast! With that, they ran off to save her somehow, they knock out 3 KKK-like color guards, and they took their clothes to disguise themselves and as the KKK-like members stopped marching, they listen to the headhoncho, whose outfit is purple, of this certain KKK-like group and he make his speech and the following KKK-like members are: Barney, Baby-Bop, B.J., Mac, Bloo, Wilt, Eduardo, Mr. Herriman, Danny Fenton, Ron Stoppable, Mr. Barkin, Jake Long, Spud, Kaz, Jack Spicer, Chase Young, Arthur, Buster Baxter, Binky Barnes, other Arthur and PBS characters, Nick jr. characters, Playhouse Disney characters, Tommy Pickles, Chuckie Finster, Phil, Dil Pickles, Chicken Little and co., Brent Bozell of the Parents Television Council, Other Rugarts/All Grown Up characters, Mr. X, Danny Phantom, Juniper Lee, Dash (Danny Phantom), Paulina, Timmy Turner, Cosmo, Wanda, Mr. and Mrs. Turner, Vicky, and Ray Ray. KKK-like Leader: O Toon! O Toons! We are foregathered here to preserve our hallowed culture and heritage! From intrusions, inclusions and dilutions! Of Anime toons! Of creed! Of our old time animated religion! We aim to pull evil up by the root! Before it chokes out the flower of our culture and heritage! And our women! Let's not forget those ladies, y'all, looking to us for protection! From Anime toons! From Anime infuenced Toons! From Toons from other countries! From superheroes! And from all those smart-a** idiots who say that we suck! That's not my culture and heritage! KKK-like Members: BOO! KKK-like Leader: Is that your culture and heritage? KKK-like Members: NO! KKK-like Leader: So tonight! We're going to hang ourselves an Anime toon! KKK-like Members: (Cheering) As Nadia being dragged by Stu Pickles and Drew Pickles prepare to head for the nooze, the convicts still disguised as the color guards, hustle up to Nadia and Ulrich whispers to her but unknown to them, Jim who is another member is following them and he suspects something about them. Ulrich: (Whispering) Nadia, it's us! Nadia! Nadia: Huh? Ulrich: It's us! Ulrich! We've come to rescue you! Nadia: That's very nice of you boys, but I don't think nothing will save me now, the devil's come to collect his due and Damien will have me sign my death warrant! Toji: But we don't want you hanged. Nadia: No I don't guess they do, but that's the way it seems to be working out. Ulrich: Listen to me Nadia, I've got a plan- Then Jim whips off the hood from Ulrich and he's exposed, the other members are stunned by this then Jim takes the hoods off Toji and Beast Boy. Beast Boy: (Nervously) Uh, peace dudes? (Holds up the peace sign and chuckles a bit) The leader lifts up his hood and the leader is none other than Eddy himself, Scrooge McDuck's competitor. Eddy: The color guard is colored! The KKK-like members roar and they start to chase the convicts and Nadia. Ulrich: Run! Toji then pucnhes Stu and Dre Pickles who were dragging Nadia and he runs off. Eddy: Who made them the color guard? Ulrich then throws the Death to Anime flag at the KKK-like members. Eddy: Damn! Don't let the flag touch the ground! The KKK-like members stop chasing the convicts and Nadia as they see the flag flying towards them and with great timing, Jim caught the flag. Eddy: Good thing, the flag didn't touch the ground. Ulrich snaps the cable holding the burning cross and then the burning cross starts to fall and... you very much get the idea. Then meanwhile, the same 1930's limosuine pulls over at the Toon Town Hall and there's an election party going on and Scrooge McDuck and his associates go inside. Scrooge McDuck: I say, hire the man anyway. Launchpad McQuack: Good idea, Mr. McD. Darkwing Duck: Hell of an idea. Launchpad McQuack: Can't beat 'em, join 'em. Darkwing Duck: Have him join us, run our campaign instead of shorty's campaign. Launchpad McQuack: No one says no to Scrooge McDuck. Darkwing Duck: Very much indeed. Scrooge McDuck: What's this young man's name again? Doanld Duck: Campaign manager? Dunbarr. Launchpad McQuack: William Dunbarr Darkwing Duck: William T. Dunbarr As Scrooge McDuck and co. goes inside, Raven from Teen Titans shows Aslan from The Chronicles of Narnia who's guarding the Toown Town Hall shows her invitation and allows her inside. Ulrich: Well, it's a invitation-only affair; we'll have to sneak in through the service entrance- Toji: Hold up! Who elect you leader of this outfit? Ever since we followed your lead, we've been in nothing but trouble! I've gotten this close to being strung up, consumed in fire, whipped to end, sunstroked, soggied-! Beast Boy: And turned into a toad! Ulrich: Gar, he was never turned into a toad. Beast Boy: Almsot loved up though. Ulrich: So, you're now you're against me too? Is that how it's going to be boys? The whole world and Yoda Almighty... and now you. Well, maybe I deserve this. Boys, I... I know I've made some tactical mistakes. But if you'll just stick with me; I need your help. And I've got a plan. Believe me, boys, we can fix this thing! I can get my wife back! We can get outta here! Toji, Beast Boy think about what he said except Nadia, who has no idea what's going on due to her lack of involvement. A/N: Well, it all comes down to the party Beast Boy: Did you say party? Well, it's sort of like that, it's an election aprty anyway, stay tuned for the next chapter. |
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| Movie-Man | Oct 7 2006, 06:52 PM Post #11 |
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Then suddenly, a car pulls over to the Toon Town Hall and Eddy comes out with his suit on instead of his KKK-like uniform and he's mad as hell. Eddy: ...Goddamn disgrace! Made a travesty of the entire evening! When I get my hands on those agitators...! Whoever heard a such behavior, even among toons? Maybe, I suspect some misgeneration in their heritage! How else are you going explain it? Using my flag as a missile? Then meanwhile, Ulrich, Toji, Beast Boy and Nadia wearing fake beards for disguise enter through the back door going up on stage as a band. Ulrich: Excuse me, coming through, we're the next band. Nadia: Wait, I'm a girl, why I' am wearing a beard? Ulrich: You're right. (Takes off the fake beard from Nadia) Let's go. Beast Boy: Dude, my beard itches. Toji: This is crazy! No one's going to believe that we're the band. Ulrich: No, this is gonna work! I just gotta get close enough to talk to her. Taking off with us is gotten a lot more future in it than marrying a guy named Dunbarr. I'm goddamn bonafide. I've got the answers! Then they enter up on stage and the crowd is sort of dead as in, not having fun and in addition to that the characters who are invited are: The Teen Titans (Extended members included minus Beast Boy), Justice League (Extended members also included), Jedi Masters, Jedi Knights and Padawans, El Cuau from Descontrol, Shinji Ikari, Faye Valentine, Goku, Gohan, Goten, Trunks, Chi Chi, Krillin, Android 18, Jeremy, Aelita, Odd, Mike, Lu, Og, Cow, Chicken, Jean Roque Raltique, Captain Nemo, Elektra, Chip and Dale, Gadget, Monterey Jack, Zipper, Fantastic Four, Spider-Man, X-Men (EVO Version), Daredevil, Doom Patrol, Yakko, Dot, Wakko, Buster and Babs Bunny, Plucky Duck, Hamton Pig, Freakazoid, Slappy Squirrel, Pinky and the Brain, Ghostbusters, Holli Would, Iron Man, Captain america, Thor, Uncle Oswidge, Fang, Rocko, Brother Rabbit, Elinore,and Mad Mod. Beast Boy: (To the band members: Edd, Toad, Princess Candy, and Weehawk including Nadia) We're In The Jailhouse, Now dudes. Once Nadia starts to play her guitar, the other band members start to play as well then they start to sing In the Jailhouse, Now. Beast Boy: (Singing) I had a friend named Ramblin' Bob Who used to steal gamble and rob He thought he was the smartest guy in town... Scrooge McDuck then goes to the table where William and Yumi are, he whispers in William Dunbarr's ear and he's quite shocked about what he's hearing. William: Well that's a improper suggestion! I can't switch sides in the middle of a campaign! Especially to work for a duck who lacks moral fibre! Scrooge McDuck: (Outraged) Moral fibre! (Whacks William with his cane) You stupid black haired son of a b****! I invented moral fibre! I was displaying rectitude and high mindedness when that short lad you work for was still messing his drawers! As Scrooge McDuck and William argue, Yumi hears someone whispering to her. Voice: (Whispering) Yumi, psst Yumi! Up here! Yumi turns around and she sees Ulrich up on stage. Ulrich: (Whispering) Yumi, (Lifts down his beard a bit) it's me! Yumi: (Dismayed) No! (Turns around) Ulrich: (Whispering) No, Yumi, listen! We're leaving this part of Toon Town! Persuing opportunities in another venue! I got big plans! Not minstrelsy; this is just a dodge, I'm going be a dentist. I know a guy who'll print me up a license! I wanna be what you want me to be, honey! I want you and the girls to come with me! (Yumi ignores him) They're my daughter's Yumi! I'm the king of this goddamn castle! Toji: (Yoldeling) Eddy: (Walks by) What are yoy doing here, McDuck? I guess someone let you have free corn! (Laughs) Scrooge McDuck: You'll be laughing in your face when I win the election. Launchpad McQuack: He'll be- Scrooge McDuck: Shut up, Launchpad! Ulrich: Yumi, just listen to me, I- Toji and Beast Boy: (Singing) I' am a Toon of Constant Sorrow! The band has no shifted to sing the song Toon of a Constant Sorrow, Ulrich goes up to the microphone and starts to sing. Ulrich: (Singing) I am a toon of constant sorrow I've seen trouble all my day. The audience begins to cheer since the song is majorly popular in Toon Town. El Cuau: Hot fucking damn! It's the fucking Soggy Bottom Guys and One Girl! YEAH! Fucking A! Toji and Beast Boy: (Singing) The place where he was born and raised. Ulrich: (Singing) For six long years I've been in trouble No pleasures here on earth I found For in this world I'm bound to ramble I have no friends to help me now. Scrooge McDuck: Holy moly! These boys are a hit! Doanld Duck: But Uncle Scrooge, they're intergrated. Scrooge McDuck: Well these toons don't mind them being intergrated. Eddy: Wait a minute... Eddy takes a closer look at Ulrich, Toji, Beast Boy and Nadia and he realises it's the same toons that saved Nadia. Eddy: It's those assholes! Give me a microphone! Eddy grabs a microphone, goes up on stage and yells into the microphone. Eddy: These toons are not like us toons! These toons are not like us toons! Hell they're not even old! I happen to know ladies and gentlemen that these "toons" here, interfered in a ceremony of a lynch mob! (The audience looks at look like he's on crack) It's true! I belong to a certain society which I don't believe I have to mention its name (Chuckles) anyway, they have threw a flag that almost touched the ground! Now this music is over! I aim to- Then the crowd starts to turn ugly as they booed at Eddy. Cyborg: Hey! Turn the music back on! El Cuau: (To Eddy) You suck! Eddy: I aim to hand these boys over to-listen to me folks! It's true! Listen to me! They have desecrated a burning cross! As the crowd boos, William whispers something to Eddy's hear and then walks off. Eddy: And they're convicts! Fugitives! Escaped from the Deadtoon farm! (Crowd still boos) We need to take them to the clone Troopers, where they belong! And I have happen to know that Anime toon, the girly one! She sold her soul to the devil! (Lu throws a tomato at him) Listen it to me! Ow! It's true! It's true! Listen to me! It's true! Then Mento of the Doom Patrol pulls out the cord that connects to the microphone so now it's off, as this goes on the convicts and Nadia laugh in victory because they finally got off easy even Scrooge McDuck is joining in. Eddy: (Begins to be pelted by fruits and vegetables including Cyborg's left arm) You can't do this! Who the hell shot me? Scrooge McDuck: Goddamn opportunity knocks! All has stopped as the door opens to reveal Slade, Jason Voorhees, The Clock King, Dr. Doom, Gendo Ikari, Mystique, and Captain Gloval carrying an 8 foot rail then they stop and they carry Eddy onto the rail and they take off as the audience cheers. Eddy: Now wait a minute! You can't do this! I'm in teh goddamn election! The audience cheers and the convicts and Nadia laugh as Eddy is carried off and then they start up the song again. Ulrich: (Singing) It's fare thee well my old lover (The audience cheers) I never expect to see you again For I'm bound to ride that northern railroad Perhaps I'll die upon this train. Toji and Beast Boy: (Singing) Perhaps he'll die upon this train. Scrooge McDuck: I'm going up there! Out of the way! Ulrich: (Singing) You can bury me in some deep valley For many years where I may lay (Sees Scrooge McDuck dancing up to the stage) Then you may learn to love another (Sees Argent square dancing with El Cuau) While I am sleeping in my grave. Toji and Beast Boy: (Singing) While he is sleeping on his grave. Ulrich: (Singing) Maybe your friends think I'm just a stranger My face you'll never see no more. But there is one promise that is given I'll meet you on God's golden shore. Toji and Beast Boy: (Singing) He'll meet you on God's golden shore. The audience cheers and claps as the songs ends and then, Scrooge McDuck comes up on stage. Scrooge McDuck: Thank you boys, thank you! (To the audience) Ladies and gentlemen and those listening at home, the great city of Toon Town, I like to thank the Soggy Bottom Boys and One Girl for their wonderful performance. (Audience cheers) Now, it seems that Eddy who is my esteemed opponent isn't a music lover. (Audience boos) Yes, I know, you all hate him since he might have a hateful grudge at the Soggy Bottom Guys and One Girl because of their rough past. (Crowd boos) But I'm with you folks, I shall forgive these children if their mischief and mayhem is out of the way, (To Ulrich) Ain't that right children? Ulrich: (Hesitates) S-sure is, governor. Scrooge McDuck: Well then, by the power invested me, these children are here by pardoned! (Audience cheers) And furthermore, in the second Scrooge McDuck administration, these children are going to be my brain trust! The audience cheers loudly as Ulrich, Toji, Beast Boy and Nadia could not believe what just happened. Ulrich: Whoa... Toji: Whoa... Nadia: Whoa... Beast Boy: Cool! (To Ulrich) Uh, what does that mean? Ulrich: Well, you, me, Nadia and Toji are going to be power behind the throne so to speak. Beast Boy: Ok. COOL! Scrooge McDuck: So to close this wonderful party! The Soggy Bottom Guys and One Girl are going to lead us in a chorus to sing You Are my Sunshine! (To Ulrich) Aren't you children? Ulrich: Governor, it'll be our pleasure! Scrooge McDuck: Son, I know I can count on you. Everyone: (Singing) You are my sunshine My only sunshine You'll make my happy... After the party is over, everyone leaves the Toon Town Hall, and Ulrich, the convicts and Nadia (Without their fake beards) and Yumi talk outside. Ulrich: I guess William Dunbarr is gonna be going on relief. Maybe I'll be able to throw a little patronage his way, get the man a job digging ditches or rounding up stray dogs. Beast Boy: Is the marriage off then, Mrs. Dunbarr? Yumi: It's back to Stern. And the marriage will take place as planned. Ulrich: Just a little change of cast. Me and the little lady are gonna pick up the pieces and retie the knot, mixaphorically speaking. You boys are invited, of course. Hell, you're best men! And Nadia, you're the brides maid. Already got the rings. But Ulrich sees that Yumi doesn't have her ring on Yumi's left hand. Ulrich: Where's your ring, Yumi? Yumi: Haven't worn it since our divorce came through came through. Must still be in the rolltop desk in the old cabin. Never thought I'd need it, William bought one encrusted with jewels. Ulrich: Hell, now's the time to buy it off him cheap. Yumi: We ain't getting married with his ring! You said you'd changed! Ulrich: Aw, honey, our ring is just a old pewter thing- Yumi: Ain't going to be no wedding. Ulrich: It's just a symbol honey- Beast Boy: We'll fetch it for you, dude. Ulrich: Shut up, Beast Boy. It's just- Yumi: I have spoken my peace and counted to three. (Walks off) Ulrich: She counted to three, she did not count to three, tell me she did not count to three! Beast Boy: Well- Ulrich: Son of a b****! You know how far that cabin is? Then something gets Ulrich, Toji, Beast Boy and Nadia's attention and they see a mob with alot of cartoon character such as characters from G.I. Joe, Love Hina, Tales Spin, Martin Succesor Nadiesco and Cowboy Bebop and they see Spike and Jet dragging none of other than Johnny Rancid. Beast Boy: Johnny? Johnny Rancid: Yo guys! Well, these motherfuckers finally caught up with the criminal of the century! Looks like the chair for Johnny Rancid. Yup! They're Gonna electrify me! I'm gonna go off like a Roman candle! Twenty thousand volts chasing the rabbit through yours truly! Gonna shoot sparks out the top of my head and lightning from my fingertips! (Laughs) Gonna suck all the power right out of Toon town! Goddamn, boys, I'm on top of the world! I'M JOHNNY RANCID AND I'M FEELING FIFTY FEET TALL! (Laughs like a maniac) Rebecca Cunningham: Cow killer! Beast Boy: Looks like the dude's back on top, again. A/N: Two chpaters to go if you count the epilogue Toji: The story's almost over? Me: Yup, but don't worry, I'm planning to do alot of parodies and I can tell you that one of them in the works is Groundhog Day but I won't get straight to that after this parody, I'm still working on that but in the meantime I'll work on other parodies so anyway, stay tuned for the next chapter. |
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| Movie-Man | Oct 7 2006, 11:51 PM Post #12 |
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The next day, Ulrich, Toji, Beast Boy are walking through the woods and they've just made to the cabin. Ulrich: Well, at least you guys will get to see the old cabin, the home where I spent so many happy days in the bosom of my family, a refugium, if you will, with a mighty oak tree out front and a happy little tire swing-what the? As it turns out everything is there outside but there's no tire swing and they also see 3 body shpaed holes. Beast Boy: Where's the happy little tire swing? Then suddenly, 10 Clone Troopers including Commander Cody with their laser rifles aimed at Ulrich, Toji, Beast Boy and Nadia. Commander Cody: End of the road boys, it had its twists and turns but it desposits you here. Ulrich: Wait a minute! Commander Cody: You have eluded fate and eluded me for the last time, tie their hands. (The Clone Troopers do so) Ulrich: You can't do this! Commander Cody: Didn't know you'd be bringing a friend, so she'll have to wait her turn and we'll have to dig up another hole for her. Ulrich: Wait you can't do this! We've just been parodned by the governor of Toon Town himself! Beast Boy: It was on the radio! Commander Cody: Well, too bad... We don't have a radio. (To the Clone Troopers) Prepare to fire. Toji: God have mercy! Nadia: I never done anything! What have I done to you people? Ulrich: It ain't the law! Commander Cody: The law. The law is a human institution but it works for toons as well. Perhaps, you should take a moment to pray. Toji: Oh s***! Beast Boy: Sorry we got you into this, Nadia. Toji: Good lord, what do we do? Ulrich sees Toji in tears, Nadia terrified, and Beast Boy prays including 4 Clone Troopers aiming their weapons at them, then Ulrich had the guts to pray to the Force. Ulrich: Oh Force, please look down and recognize us poor sinners... Please Force. I just want to see my daughters again. Oh Force, I've been separated from my family for so long. I know I've been guilty of pride and sharp dealing. I'm sorry that I turned my back on you, Force. Please forgive me, and help us, Force, and I swear I'll mend my ways... For the sake of my family... For Nadia's sake, and Gar's, and Toji's... As Ulrich prays, a little stream of water is passing by then a rumble is occuring. Ulrich: Let me see my daughters again. Please, Force, help us... Please help us... Then a huge tidal wave, comes crashing down, destroying the cabin and and the Clone Troopers get wiped out by the tidal wave and Ulrich holds his breath as the tidal wave comes crashing down. So now, the entire location of the cable is now turned into a lake just as Ulrich however, Ulrich, Toji, Beast Boy and Nadia have survived the huge wave so Ulrich surfaces and he hangs on to a coffin left on one of the holes dug up. Beast Boy: A miracle! It was a miracle! Ulrich: Don't be ignorant Gar, I told you this valley was going to be flooded. Beast Boy: No that ain't it! Toji: You prayed to the force and it pitied us! Ulrich: It just never fails; once again you two idiots are showing how much you want for innalect. There's a perfectly scientific explanation for what just happened- Toji: Then why were you praying? Ulrich: Well any human being will cast about in a moment of stress. No, the fact is, they're flooding this valley so they can hydro-electric up the whole damn town. Yes sir, Toon Town's gonna change. Everything's gonna be put on electricity and run on a paying basis. Out with the old spiritual mumbo jumbo, the superstitions and the backward ways. We're gonna see a brave new world where they run everyone a wire and hook us all up to a grid. Yes sir, a veritable age of reason, like the one they had in France and not a moment too soon... Ulrich then sees a cow on the roof just as The Question said, as the cow stares at him, Ulrich stares back at the cow. Ulrich: Not a moment to soon. (Sees Nadia) Say there's Nadia! What are you riding there Nadia? Nadia: (Hanging on to a roll top desk) Roll top desk. A/N: I decided to include the prologue here so this is the final chapter of this parody Later, Ulrich is back with Yumi and as Ulrich and Yumi talk, their daughters walk with them as they sing Angel Band. Ulrich: All's well that ends well as the poet said. Yumi: That's right, honey. Ulrich: But I don't mind telling you, I'm awful pleased my adventuring days have come to an end. (Takes out the ring) Time for this old boy to enjoy some repose. (Slips the ring on Yumi's finger on her left hand) Yumi: That's good, honey. Ulrich: And you were right about that ring. Any other wedding band would not do. But this was foreordained, honey; fate was smilig' on me, and you have to have confidence- Yumi: (Looks at the ring) That's not my ring. Ulrich: In the gods-huh? Yumi: That's not my ring. Ulrich: Not your- Yumi: It's my mother's ring. Ulrich: You said it was in the rolltop desk! Yumi: I said, I thought it was in the rolltop desk. Ulrich: You said- Yumi: Or under the mattress. Ulrich: You- Yumi: Or the sofa. I don't know. Ulrich: Sorry, but- Yumi: We need that ring. Ulrich: But the ring is in a goddamn big lake. A 9,000 foot lake. Yumi: I don't care if it's ninety thousand. Ulrich: But honey- Yumi: I have counted to three. Ulrich: But you don't understand... As Ulrich and Yumi talk, the girls follow their parents but Marie stops at the railroad and sees that The Question on the same flatcar is singing along with that but Marie decides to shrug it off and continues walking thus ending the parody. A/N: Well that's it. That's the parody, hope you enjoyed it and I'll be reading your fanfics. Yumi: Ulrich, have you kissed someone in this parody? Ulrich: No, why? Yumi: Well, it's that you smell like Anayami. Ulrich: I didn't really. Yumi: Ulrich don't lie. Ulrich: Come on Yumi.... Me: Well, anyway, that's it for this parody but don't worry, I'll be doing more parodies in the near future so good day y'all. |
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7:17 PM Jul 10