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★ First Impressions ★
Topic Started: Jan 19 2016, 01:12 PM (249 Views)
Bill Clinton
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Only I (and my wife, and my miscellaneous interns, because jokes about infidelity are GREAT) can really win New Hampshire. But I guess you guys are gonna try it out. You folks. Oh geez.

That's literally all I have to say. Have fun, kids. Remember retail politics! Shake hands! Kiss babies! Kiss more babies! Kiss adults! Kiss each other! Kiss democracy! Posted Image

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Ben Carson

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Carly Fiorina

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Donald Trump

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Elizabeth Warren

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Mark Udall

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Michelle Bachmann

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Rand Paul

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Tulsi Gabbard

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Vermin Supreme

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Vermin Supreme
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Hello everyone! Want a free pony? When I'm president, everyone will get a free Pony!
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Ben Carson
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Braniac
When I am president, everyone will get free brain surgeries!!
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Rand Paul
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"In 2000, Fisher-Price changed the rotary dial for a push-button version with lights in an effort to modernize the toy, but consumers complained and the rotary version returned to the market the following year."
I will give every American a shopping spree at the Free Market.
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Tulsi Gabbard
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Princess Lei-a
When I'm president I guarantee everybody gets lei'd
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Carly Fiorina
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Hewlett Packard and the Three-Page Tax Code
It is a pleasure to meet you all!
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Vermin Supreme
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Tulsi Gabbard
Mar 31 2016, 09:19 PM
When I'm president I guarantee everybody gets lei'd
I'm a fan of this word-play
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Carly Fiorina
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Hewlett Packard and the Three-Page Tax Code
Well, good-night everyone! I will see you all tomorrow for our first challenge!

I don't know if I will be on right at the onset, but I will be available tomorrow evening into the early morning, for reference!

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Elizabeth Warren
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Let Your Fingers Do the Walking Through the Warren
I promise to level out everyone's wages and reduce all your paychecks by 99%.
Wait. Did I say reduce. I meant increase. Yes.
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Michelle Bachmann
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Ring Around the Bachmann Gets Your Whole Wash Clean
I promise to do things I will never actually do, but sound really awesome and amazing and that obviously the majority or people want, but since the minority in power doesn't, it'll never actually happen!
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